A/N: Dedicated to Carrie Fisher.
She was gone. Our princess, our general, she was gone. She was the last of the old rebellion.
Rey sat on a bench in the Falcon. She held the two beacons in her hands. They could no longer lead her back to Leia. The general was in a place she could not follow. They all were. All of the people she looked to as leaders as…parents were gone. Even Chewie had left, had disappeared after Leia's funeral. Rey clenched her fist tight, the beacons digging into her hand. Leia had told her that even in death she would be with her. But how can she be there Rey thought if I feel this empty? If I feel this lost?
XxXxX
Leia was simply tired in the days leading up to her death. She didn't ache. She wasn't sick. She was simply tired. She knew she didn't have long to live. She walked out of the rebel compound and into the morning sun. She could see Rey practicing with her lightsaber. The poor girl was dripping with sweat. She watched the skill that Rey had with the weapon. She always found lightsabers to be elegant. As Rey finished her last imaginary bout Leia slowly walked up to her and sat on a large rock. Rey smiled as she saw her.
"You remind me of Luke," Leia said. "He was always working at becoming a better Jedi. He believed discipline was one of the keys of being the best Jedi he could be."
Rey nodded. She had heard this from him while she had been on the island. "He would always leave it at that when he talked to me, when he spoke of being a Jedi. He never told me what else was key to being the best one could be."
"The most important key, he told me once, was hope. He told me he would crumble if he ever lost hope. He told me that if he ever lost his hope that would be the day he would no longer be a Jedi. He lost his hope that night, when he went to go visit my son."
"You know?"
"Yes, I know. In that moment he wasn't a Jedi. He was only a scared old man who didn't want to revisit his past. He didn't want to see his father in the nephew he was training. He always carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. He always felt like he was the one thing between peace for the galaxy and it falling into darkness."
"Do you still have hope? After all this time?"
"Yes, I have to. I don't have any room for doubt and neither do you. Luke made mistakes and you will too. Just don't make the same ones he did." Rey nodded. "Now help this old woman up. You need to eat and so does she." Rey rushed to grab hold of Leia as she struggled to stand.
XxXxX
Kylo, thankfully, felt his mother's death when he was alone. He didn't want to show weakness in front his subordinates again. He felt as if he had been hit with a blaster, when it happened, and he fell back onto his bed. His entire body ached. He could barely move. He was paralyzed with grief. His mother was the one person in the universe he could never harm. She used to sing to him and hold him to calm him down. He could almost hear her voice singing that old familiar song.
XxXxX
"On the loose to climb a mountain, on the loose where I am free. On the loose to live my life the way I think my life should be." Leia sang as she rubbed her young son's back. He had been playing with another child when he was pushed down. The older kid laughed at him when he started to cry from the pain. It wasn't the first time this older kid had done this and it wouldn't be the last for many months until the kid moved away.
"I don't like him Mama. He's mean to me," Ben pouted.
"I know, honey. He doesn't deserve your anger or your thoughts. You are a strong little boy. All he wants in a reaction out of you. Keep your head up." She placed a hand under his chin and lifted it so he could meet her eyes. "And ignore him. It's all you can do." Ben buried his head into his mother's chest. She was safe and warm. He calmed as she continued to rub his back.
XxXxX
Several hours later Kylo had yet to move. He was wallowing in his grief on his bed when he felt Rey pop into his mind. He sat up to face her and could see she was holding her hands tight as she sat on a bench. Her face was full of tears.
"What?" He asked. He hadn't wanted to be disturbed.
"She was your mother." Kylo nodded. "How—how are you?" She asked.
Kylo clenched his jaw and shook his head. He couldn't take her asking about his pain. Anyone else he would have shouted back at them that he was fine but not her. She could see right through him. He resented it.
She held out her hand for him. Her eyes pleading that he take it. Her pain written on her face. She needed him to take it. In all that she was here to help him, she needed him to help her. In this moment, Kylo thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He reached out his hand and grabbed hers. Chills ran up his arm and over the rest of his body. All he wanted right now was her. He pulled her into his lap. He knew she wasn't really there, but he didn't care. He wanted someone, wanted her close. He wrapped his arms around her as she sat sideways on his lap. A hesitant hand went up to his hair. He leaned into her touch as her fingers played with his dark hair. There was a small smile on her face Kylo noticed. He felt the corners of his mouth tugging upward as he watched her face and the contentment that playing with his hair brought her. She looked down at him, her smile faltering as she noticed him watching her. His bare fingers brushed her temple and then his hand cupped her face. His eyes flickered down to her lips. A thought of pulling her close to kiss her had just passed when she jumped off his lap.
"I have to go." Turning away, she left. His hand was still up where he had cupped her face. He felt even more empty that he had been before. He clenched his hands and got up. He put on his gloves. He would go bully Hux. That always made him feel better. He needed his anger now more than ever.
XxXxX
"Rey?" Finn's voice called.
"In here!" Rey returned. Her heart was racing. Had she really thought about kissing Ben? Had she really played with his hair? A moment later Finn's face appeared.
"Hey, everyone is worried about you." Which meant him and Poe.
"I'm," she almost lied and said okay, "I've been here. I needed a moment alone." She opened her hand and showed him the beacons that she had been holding. He placed his hand on her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug.
"We're here for you," he said into her shoulder.
"I know. Go tell Poe I'm okay. I know he is what you meant when you said everyone," she said as he released her. He nodded and turned to go. "Come back, after," she said before he could fully leave. He nodded again and left.
She sat back down on her bench. She set the beacons aside and rubbed her face with her hands. She was tired. Ever since Ben and her fought she hadn't been sleeping well. He had thankfully kept their connection closed as well but every time she closed her eyes she saw him. She saw him standing there as she closed the Falcon's door on him. His anger and loss reflected in his eyes. In that moment she had truly believed he was lost to her but now after what just happened in his room she wasn't sure. She could feel that his mother's death broke him more than he already was. All she wanted to do was help but she was in no place to offer it and be able to give it to him if he took her up on it.
She heard Finn walk back into the Falcon. He grabbed the beacons and sat down next to her. With his other hand he grabbed hers. They sat there like that in silence for a while. She looked at him. She smiled and placed a lingering kiss on his check. He turned his head toward her, redness tinting his dark skin tone.
"I—" he swallowed. His mouth was suddenly dry.
Rey pulled him close and kissed him on the lips gently. "Yes?" she asked.
"Yes." He pulled her in for another kiss. They barely parted lips before kissing again. Rey moved to straddle him. His hands running down he back to cup her ass. This time when they kissed they didn't pull apart. Her tongue worked its way into his mouth. Their tongues played as Rey worked her way under Finn's top. She ran her hands up and rested them on his broad chest.
Rey broke their kiss. "This needs to be off." She tugged on his shirt. He fumbled trying to quickly remove it. Rey smiled and helped him remove the article of clothing.
He kissed her again before saying, "Same with you". Like everything else she did, Finn thought, she pulled off her top gracefully. Finn admired her as he ran his hand up from her hips. He rubbed his hands around her breasts before cupping them gently. "May I?" He asked wanting to caress her breasts with his lips. She nodded. Finn placed a kiss in between her breasts before encircling a nipple with his mouth and sucking gently. He watched her as he closed her eyes and moaned. As he switched nipples her hands went to his head and his short hair. Her fingers felt like they were missing something, like there needed to be more there. The rest of her didn't care. Her mind knew it was just an after effect of seeing Ben.
Rey pushed Finn back and brought her head down to kiss his neck. She worked her way down his neck and nibbled along his collar bone. It was Finn's turn to moan. Her hands found their way downward to rub Finn's erection. Her mouth worked back up to his neck and then along his jawline stopping at his ear. "Can I taste?"
"Please," he begged. She placed her legs back on the floor and dropped down in front of Finn. "Fuck," he swore, "Poe how long have you been there." At that Rey turned to find Poe leaning against a wall and biting his lower lip.
"Please don't stop on my account. I was enjoying the view." Poe smiled. "Oh, and since you two started." Rey looked up at Finn questioningly. "Please continue. It will be like I am not even here."
Rey shrugged and unbuckled Finn's belt. As she pulled down his pants, Finn turned from Poe to watch her. She took his erection in her hands and place her mouth on the tip. Finn no longer cared that he was being watched he was lost with the feel of her mouth taking as much of him as she could. When she did a trick with her tongue his hands went straight to her hair. He wanted to push her head down and keep her on his dick but a warning look from her stopped him. Instead he just grabbed her hair and held on for the ride. And fuck was it a wild ride. Finn didn't know if she had ample opportunity to suck many cocks on Jakku but she definitely knew what she was doing. Finn came into her mouth.
"Don't swallow and kiss me," Poe said. He was right next to her. His eyes wide with desire. Rey didn't question and turned so she could kiss him. He pried her mouth open with his tongue. He wanted to taste Finn. He let Finn's ejaculate run into his mouth and swallowed. "Carry on," he moved back to his post leaning against the wall. He was licking his lips.
Finn pulled Rey up and pushed down onto the bench. He pulled down her pants and settled his head between her legs. He thanked the force that Rose taught him how to eat out. He started out softly, only gently playing with her. When her breathing started getting heavier he moved his mouth over her clit and sucked gently. His thumbs rubbing circles on the inside of her thighs. "Fuck" she moaned. He worked through his tricks that Rose had helped him pick up. He sometimes sucked, sometimes nibbled. And Rey got evermore insensible with pleasure. Finn knew she was close when she moaned, "Finn, please." He did one final thing that he knew would make her climax and she cried out in pleasure. Finn kept it up until her orgasm rode itself out.
XxXxX
"Where have you been? We've been waiting for you for hours." Hux spat out.
"That is none of you're concern General," Kylo replied. "I had other matters to attend to. Matters that you need to know nothing about." Kylo stared Hux down. Hux looked away. "Now why have you been waiting on me so impatiently?"
"We've found the rebels. This time we have a plan that will that will not allow for escape." Kylo could tell Hux was excited. He had a manic look about him.
"What plan is this?"
XxXxX
Rey felt Ben pop into her mind as she lay in her bunk late at night.
"I didn't realize you made house calls." She said without looking at him.
"They've, we've found you and are preparing a plan that will allow for no escape." He said it as if it hurt him to warn her.
"Why are you warning me?" She sat up and turned to face him.
"I—I can't," he stopped to chew on his words. He clenched his fists, closed his eyes, and sighed. "I can't lose anyone else." He opened his eyes and looked into hers. "I can't lose you too."
"I must warn the others. We have to leave the base." Rey went to leave.
"Wait," she stopped. "They're tracking you. You can't all leave the base without them knowing and following you."
"Then what are we to do?" Kylo held out his hand for her. She took it and he pulled her close. He kissed her forehead.
"I have a plan," he told her. He closed his eyes and placed his forehead on hers. He laced his fingers through hers and told her all she needed to know.