INSPECTOR: Hello my dear and devoted subje-er…I mean my dear and devoted fans!
KYO: Pretending you're king of the world again Dum-spector?
INSPECTOR: *pouting* I believe your contract says that you must call me "Your Majesty", when I decide to act like this…and We Are Not Amused.
KYO: *grumbling* Stupid…yes….Your Majesty…grrr….
BUTTONS:…this…came…from…a…movie….any…who….can…gues s what it…is…g-gets…a…prizzzzzzzzzz
RINA: And lo siento, but nobody happened to give the correct answer…which was Golden Girls…but you have another chance! So be careful…and think…X…and 2008!
KYO: *wearing a jester's outfit*….sigh…His Majesty doesn't own a thing. Prepare the fanfare!
NICKY: *wearing cat ears* And don't forget to check out his Collab with the TEAM TITAN WRITERS! Entitled As You Were!
DuhDuhDuhDUH!
It was another normal day at Jump City Kindergarten. The birds were singing the sun was shining, small children were gathered in a circle chanting, and Raven was in the middle of the circle standing over a shocked, and crying five year old…
Over towards the side there was a rather interesting cactus in the shape of a T-180…what…oh…you want to go back and see what Raven is about to do to the poor whimpering little boy on the floor who is acting like he is about to meet the Lord of the Underworld himself instead of just his son, and never ever ever play with his toys or see the light of day…are you sure? Because that cactus sure looks mighty interesting!
Oh fine, whatever. We'll go back to Raven standing like a fierce Amazonian about to go in for the ki—what! You want to find out WHY Raven was about to violently sacrifice a pitiful little kindergartener who needed a new pair of underwear? Oh…fine…but are you sure you don't want to look at that cactus somemore? It's so romantic! There's even a carved SR & T 4ever…
Well it all started when a certain 6'6 bleached blonde named Parker decided that he was going to take Zeek's students to the nearby park…in Tokyo…needless to say…Zeek wasn't exactly pleased with his best friend…
Parker grinned sheepishly as Zeek's brown eyes slowly began to turn black. Well…Tokyo is much closer to Gyu-Won than Jump City was…
Gyu-Won looked up from her gayageum, a frown on her face… she could have sworn that she had just heard Parker's voice…crying…but…Parker was on the other side of the planet…mmmm…..
As Parker ran away screaming for his life with a pissed of Prince of Hell sending out his horde of hellhounds after a certain irresponsible giant…Zeek's students decided that they wanted to play Casa Cristo—a game that Parker had told them about—and they were all divided into teams of three to see who would win…
The object of the game…to cross through the desert of the sandbox, go through the mountainous slides, and then slip through the Maltese Ice Tunnels…and then get to the finish line first…
Beast Boy grinned as he fixed his special yellow ascot adjusted his goggles and tapped his white and red helmet. He was going to win this thing. Sitting on a bench, reading—or at least pretending to read—sat Raven, and she hid a smile behind her book when she saw how adorable her grass stain looked.
It was then, just as the toddlers of Jump City Kindergarten were getting ready to play that the number one racer of Togokhan Kindergarten appeared…and his name was Taejo…
Taejo smirked as he walked up…which was rather impressive for the little five year old…who knew a five year old who could smirk?
Finally reaching the others Taejo's smirk widened. "I wish to join in your race." The toddler said arrogantly. The others were rather perturbed by the little boy, but BB being BB grinned and told them let the boy play.
Parker came running with Zeek not too far away when they spotted the assorted toddlers. Looking at one another and deciding to take a rain check on their death chase they pulled out some sunglasses. Grabbing their microphones, the two best friends grabbed a nearby bench and began to do what they did best…
"We're just minutes away from the start of the Casa Cristo! You know Parker a lot of people call this the Grand Dame of Playground Racing!"
Parker nodded. "Yes and there are some who would say the most dangerous. In recent years there have been talks by the International Playground Committee to outlaw the game…"
"Ah yes," Zeek said, "there have been major owies in the last three years which have prompted the IPC to consider discontinuing the game…"
"You know there are some toddlers who would say the hardest part is the start!"
"Oh, the Murquanna?"
"Yeah those sprinklers are tricky…"
A movement to the right caught both of their attention. "Ah, speaking of starts, here comes the Queen of the Playground herself. The moment she sees the light glint off the slide, she'll signal the start of the race."
The little girl squinted off into the distance. The toddlers narrowed their own eyes, making race noises as they waited with bated breath. And then finally… "BOOM!"
"And the racers are off!" Parker and Zeek shouted.
As the little racers took off, they all ran to see who would make it to the finish line first! Just as the racers made it to the beginning of the sandbox, three of the racers fell to the Murquanna, unable to navigate the deadly sprinklers.
"Ooh!" Parker Cringed. "it looks like another few bit the dust!"
Raven watched as Starfire and Dick perished in the deserts, taken out by Cyborg's questionably legal double mace hammer…
"It is nearly impossible to see what happens in those sands." Zeek remarks to Parker, who simply nods, viciously munching on some popcorn.
"Next are the hills!"
Taejo chuckled darkly as he passed the other toddlers. Haha! No one could beat him! He passed by another kid, and tripped a little redhead.
A certain pinkette stopped to coo over the boy's hurt.
Parker stopped munching on his popcorn to announce, "And it looks like Wally is out of the race, his ever loyal pink shadow Jinx taking a DNF to help him. Taejo is in the lead, leaving only Cyborg and Beast Boy as his contenders."
"And you know what's next Parker!" Zeek said, sharing a look with the redeyed giant. "The Maltese Ice Tunnels."
Cyborg slipped the moment he entered the tunnel, leaving BB and Taejo as the only remaining racers.
They twisted and turned, and Taejo put everything he had into this race. He couldn't lose to that stupid Green Boy!
As the two burst out of the tunnels, Beast Boy gave an extra spurt of speed. He needed to win this for Raven…
Just before he hit the finish line…he tripped…on his own shoelace. He had never quite learned that bunny around the tree and into the hole…
Taejo shouted out victoriously as he passed into Victory Lane! He won again!
"It looks like young Taejo-kun is the winner of the Casa Cristo once again." Zeek sighed.
Parker was crying, "Yes, but young BB always has next year! And then he'll have tying shoes down to a T!"
Taejo basked in the approval of his peers. When one asked if he had thought that the green boy was a challenge the Japanese boy laughed. "No, because he's dumb. Probably the dumbest boy in the whole playground! What a loser."
Raven, who had just been making her way over to comfort her poor grass stain heard the remark made by the cocky, arrogant, mean little doodie head and before she knew it she had stomped up to Taejo pulled her fist back and punched him right in the face.
Which brings us back to the beginning of our story. With Raven standing over the whimpering Taejo, who's cheek was throbbing with pain; and who's eyes were wide and fearful. As Raven brought up her other hand, a blur of green had jumped in.
"Rae?" the green toddler asked. Nodding for him to continue, Raven waited. "W-would you like to see my car collection?"
Smiling Raven nods. "I'd love too."
As she dragged her smiling changeling, Raven had only one thought. You'll always be a winner to me.
Parker cooed in the background. "Would you look at that folks! Young Garfield Logan better known as Jump City Kindergarten's Beast Boy may not have won the Casa Cristo, but he won the girl! And all that matters is the Game of Love! I'm coming for you Gyu-won!"
Gyu-Won looked up once more from her table in Catharsis. She could have sworn that she had heard her large American boyfriend for the second time that day.
Thinking about her giant, ever-changing hair color, hyperactive, lovable boyfriend Parker, Gyu-Won couldn't help but smile. She had never felt like more of a winner than when she knew that Parker was all hers…
Now don't you think that story about the cactus would have been much more interesting?