The Divinity of Sayuri Tougeika

Summary: Severus Snape's life might not have been virtuous, but in its own way it was safe and predictable. Teach potions to bunches of teens and pre-teens that mostly didn't care, ride herd on a horde of the same who think that they're clever and seem to have caught Chronic Backstabbing Syndrome, fight a spy's war playing the two opposing sides… And then a new bunch of transfer students come to Hogwarts; his life will never be the same again.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya – which, while not actually being in this fic (for the time being), I will be taking a (rather large) page from it. And yes I'm using the movies version of the uniforms. Umm… I did this for the lulz? Cookies (and a bit of public recognition) for whoever can catch references to other fandoms. As always praise is loved, constructive criticism will help me grow as a writer, questions will be answered so long as I have a way to get back to you, and flames will generate head scratches.

Enter the Transfer Students – Part 1

It was the beginning of another 'fine' year at Hogwarts. The returning students were split between gossiping with their friends and housemates that they hadn't seen since they got off the train earlier that evening (which everyone should know was, for a teenager, practically forever) and panicking over the summer homework they still had yet to even start. The new first years were all sorted and now being subjected to the usual round of non-sorting related horror stories courtesy of the upper years. The anticipation to gorge one's self was running high and yet the Headmaster had yet to spout off the bit of sheer utter nonsense that acted as a cue for the castle's house elves to start sending up the feast. As if on cue the Headmaster stood up, opened his mouth, and spoke.

"Before we get down to the long awaited feast, there is one more little matter that needs to be taken care of." Dumbledore proclaimed. Almost as one the entire hall deflated as their hopes of filling their empty bellies sometime soon were dashed to pieces. There was hope, fleeting and farfetched as it was, that Dumbledore's little pre-supper surprise wouldn't take too long. Dumbledore continued on as if he were totally unaware of the hungry despair he'd just set everyone to, "This year we've been graced with a wondrous opportunity. One that Hogwarts has never before witnessed in all its glorious history. This year, in addition to all the new first years we were lucky enough to be graced with, we are happy to welcome four transfer students from our cousins in America. I know you all will do your best to make them feel welcome."

It was at that point when the four mentioned teens walked into the Great Hall to a hungry (and somewhat tired) silence. It was clear that these Americans were not used to wearing uniforms, unlike their British counterpoints. The boy of the group, although with his long pale blond hair (pulled back in a loose ponytail) and slight, almost effeminate features it would be easy enough to mistake him for a girl, was the closest to being properly in uniform. He at least was wearing the robe unlike his compatriots although he left it completely open and his shirt, blazer, and slacks were neat and unaltered. The tallest of the girls, who could have easily been Latina, Native American, or a mix of who knows what, had her robe slung over her shoulder and was wearing the boys uniform tailored tightly enough to her so that it was obvious that she was a girl even with her ink black hair cut in a rather boyish pixie cut. The other blonde in the group didn't even bother wearing either robe or uniform. Instead she was dressed in a rather elaborate, lacy, all black dress that almost seemed right off of the set of a Victorian drama that made her china doll pale skin virtually glow which was complimented with the wide black bow holding her hair in place. The last girl was a shock to the system – even among those used to muggle fashions. She was, in a way, wearing the girl's uniform but it was far from proper. The blazer was outright missing and the robe had been cut down to jacket length. The skirt had been hemmed to within an inch of its life to fall to barely mid-thigh (and that was if one was being generous) while the first couple of buttons on the shirt were unbuttoned leaving the barest hint of bra lace peeked out. Her shiny chestnut colored hair was cut to shoulder length and, like her blonde friend, held back by a – red in this case – ribbon although hers was tied in more of a headband fashion. Certainly they garnered attention, and now the silence had moved from 'oh my god when are we finally gonna be allowed to eat'' to a mix of 'what the bleeding hell were these yanks thinking' and (to a lesser extent, but you have to remember that you were dealing with a mixed bunch of hormonal teenagers) 's/he looks hot'. Professor McGonagall gave a near invisible distasteful sniff at the new transfers (or more accurately, they're lack of respect for propriety and Hogwarts' traditions) and got back to the business of the sorting.

"Chavez, Julia." she called out and the tallest of the girls stalked over to the stool. Sitting down with an almost feline grace despite the awkwardness of someone who was approaching (if not already having reached) six feet tried to fit on a stool meant for people nearly two feet shorter and five years younger, she waited as the Sorting Hat was placed on her head.

"What have we here?" asked the familiar yet unfamiliar voice of the Hat, "I must say that we do not see many of your kind here. In fact I can think of only one other that has passed under me since the founding of this very institution, and even then he was not quite your sort."

"You have dealt with other lycans?" came Julia's quiet reply.

"A werewolf actually, poor boy; things are not so easy for the likes of them what with their being classified as dark creatures and all. But I can tell that that is not your curse – although for your sake I do hope that you have arranged to take the proper protections; our esteemed potions master is actually quite skilled and has had little trouble brewing up Wolfsbane Potion when we needed it a few years ago." the Hat advised.

"That will not be necessary. My curse as you put it is different from that of a werewolf. For one, I do not turn into a wolf when I transform. For another, my transformations are not tied to the phases of the moon but rather to my very heart. And lastly, while certainly painful my bite in my transformed state is only infections as the bite from any other large cat; the curse is transferred another way entirely and you can be assured that I would never infect anyone without their wanting it." Julia placated.

"If you are sure…" the Hat said with a hint of disbelief. Julia just nodded as best she could while wearing the hat that had yet to sort her as was its job.

"I am curious though," Julia began, "Just how you were able to tell that I was… more than human."

"Well," replied the Hat puffing up a bit with pride, "the Founders imbued me with the ability to see into the hearts and the minds of the students so that I would be able to properly figure out where they belonged and what you are does play a rather large part in who you are although it does not – and should not – fully define you."

"In that case," Julia warned, "I must ask you that when it is time to sort my friend Sayuri that you do not let on that you know that she is not fully human. I might not have room to speak, not being fully human myself, but it is vitally important that she does not know what she is beyond being a powerful witch."

The Hat didn't believe her; after all, it was fairly dangerous not to know what you were when you factored in magic as what you didn't know could kill not only yourself but everyone around you. But it wasn't really his place to judge in that respect and any way, as these sortings were private affairs it really wouldn't hurt to let Julia believe that he was planning to heed her warning. "And speaking of finding people places to belong, it is time for me to find the proper place for you. I can clearly see that you have a fine if cunning mind, as well as a fierce determination to see that those you care about are protected. All noble things that would suit you well in any of the houses. However, I can clearly see that you would gladly step between a killing curse and the people you hold as precious and that you have travelled across an ocean, away from all that you knew out of a desire to stay close to your friends. Such loyalty as that is certainly worthy of any of those who have ever or will ever sat beneath the black and yellow banner of Hufflepuff!"

And with that last announcement the hall erupted in polite clapping as Julia was sorted. Julia handed the Sorting Hat back to Professor McGonagall and made her way to the indicated table while all the while silently hoping that being in a different house from Sayuri (who, while herself being a loyal and wonderful {if at times overbearing, but what could you do} friend, she knew did not have the right kind of disposition for Julia's new house) wouldn't cause any trouble.

With Julia sorted and seated, Professor McGonagall then called on the next transfer student to come forward for their turn in the Hat. "Goodfellow, Robin."

Robin sauntered over to the stool and took his seat managing not to look as awkward as Julia had from the size difference by sitting on the stool cross legged. Sure it looked a bit weird and it'd make standing back up again a little harder, but frankly Robin didn't care.

"My, my, my. I can't say that I've ever had to sort a fae before. In truth most consider your kind to only be the stuff of children's tales these days." the Hat commented, mind to mind.

Robin shrugged flippantly. "What can I say; I am unique."

"But surely one of your kind has no reason to learn human magic." the Hat countered, puzzled.

"That is true," Robin admitted, "However, my Lady and Queen asked that I look into a small matter of some importance and I felt it was… prudent… that I obey with little complaint. And I must say that I am glad I did; I had almost forgotten how entertaining the mortal world was. Why I haven't enjoyed an assignment this much since my Lord and King bid me to… Well, that's not really important now to the task at hand."

"Oh?" the Hat questioned.

"Sayuri does keep things interesting even if she's really more trouble than she's worth. But Lord and Lady knows what would happen if she ever found out the truth – and I trust you can help on that front. If not, I could always place a geis on you; I cannot stress enough how vital it is that the masquerade remain unbroken as far as she's concerned."

"That will not be necessary I can assure you." the Hat sweatdropped, "Anyway, let's get down to business shall we."

Robin just nodded and let the Hat do its magic, helped along with a bit of surreptitious time manipulation magic as Robin had in truth lived a very long and complicated life (often under many names) which would have taken the Hat hours if not days to go over had Robin not essentially pressed the fast forward button, and Robin could easily sense the impatience of the crowd who felt it was well past the time of their dinner and just wanted things to go on so that they could eat, sleep, and (for some) finish off the last of their summer homework.

"Well," the Hat said after about ten minutes objective time and ten lifetimes compressed subjective time, "It's safe to say that you display the qualities exemplified from all four houses, but having not only survived but practically thrived in the Seelie court for so long you should have no problem navigating the political viper's nest that is Slitherin!"

"Not unexpected, and it shouldn't be too big an obstacle to my mission." Robin commented before he removed the Hat to, once again, quiet applause. And if the applause seemed quieter and lacking in luster compared to Julia's sorting, he choose to ignore it.

"Schwarzchild, Victoria." Professor McGonagall called and the girl clad in the gothic lolita dress came forward to perch as best she could on the stool.

"A vampire!" the Hat exclaimed.

"Yes." Victoria replied plainly.

"Aren't any of you normal witches or wizards?" the Hat questioned with a snort; even taking into account the whole transfer student thing this whole affair was completely unprecedented.

"No." Victoria answered despite the fact that the question was probably meant to be rhetorical.

"And I suppose you too are going to warn me away from letting the last of you lot know what whatever the hell she is is." the Hat said almost sarcastically.

"Yes." Victoria answered back, ignoring the Hat sweatdropping again.

"Anyway…" the Hat continued on, "let's get you settled in. Loyal to the death for those who you've felt earned it… courageous enough to place yourself amongst people who would cheerfully see you burn to ash under fiendfyre… cunning enough to be able to keep up your masquerade amongst said people to the point where they have no clue what you are… and a love of learning so strong that you're willing to put up people centuries younger in hopes that you can learn something new… Then might as well make you Ravenclaw!"

It only took Victoria a moment to hand the Sorting Hat back to Professor McGonagall and make her way to the table where her new house mates sat. Hat back in hand, Professor McGonagall read off the last name on the scroll. "Tougeikai, Sayuri."

"Hai!" the last transfer student chirped happily (much to the confusion of those in the room who didn't already know her) as she pranced over to the stool. With little ceremony (for even Professor McGonagall agreed that the sorting had gone on long enough and it was well past time to eat already) the Hat was placed on Sayuri.

"Well let's get this over with." the Hat grumbled (and what did it say when even an inanimate albeit enchanted object wanted things over and done with). The Hat blinked as it began its traditional mind dive, "Well no wonder the others warned me about you."

"How so?" Sayuri asked curiously.

'Oh crap.' the Hat thought; it wasn't supposed to be keeping mum on the whole 'Sayuri isn't human' thing. "Well…" it began as it started to sweat a bit as it tried to come up with something plausible to tell the girl, "They mentioned that I might just have a tad bit of trouble finding just the right house for you; what with you're being so complex and all and having the qualities that the Founders decided were the hallmarks for their houses in spades." Which was even true (mostly).

"Oh." Sayuri said, her earlier question answered satisfactorily.

The Sorting Hat let out a metaphorical sigh of relief as she bought his cover up. "I don't suppose that you have a House preference do you?" the Hat asked. True it was somewhat unusual to have a student decide which of the four Houses they wanted to be in (and downright rare for the Hat to come right out and ask), it wasn't entirely unprecedented (the famed Harry Potter being one notable example) and yes even a hat could become tired and just want to get things over and done with.

"Uh-uh." Sayuri replied with a head shake.

Once again the Hat sighed; of course instead of doing the sane thing that pretty much any other incoming student would've done if they'd had the same rare chance and actually, you know, picking which House they wanted to be in, this one was going to be difficult and delay everyone's dinners even further by basically… forcing the Hat to do its job. Ok so the Hat probably should've been happy to do what it was literally created to do no matter what the circumstances were, but the night was dragging on and it had a sinking suspicion that if this sorting dragged on any longer than it already was, then it was going to be lynched by the hungry students and faculty (forgetting for a moment that it was pretty impossible to hang something that had no neck and didn't need to breathe). Of course nothing said that the Hat had to do its job properly at this point, so it decided to go with the 'pull crap out of what would be its ass if it actually had one and just pick something at random paired with as lame a justification as it could get away with' method of sorting. "So as I said, you'd fit equally well in any of the Houses, possessing a great deal of intelligence, diligence, ambition, scholarly dedication, loyalty, cunning, and courage. However, I detect just a smidgen more of the courage than the other values so I think – in my oh so magical (read scientific except science is a Muggle thing and this is the Wizarding World) opinion that it is best if the House you go to is Gryffindor!"

"Yay!" Sayuri said happily as she was sorted in an actually reasonable amount of time (and less then her friend Robin at that). Handing that Hat off to her new Head of House she happily skipped over to the table her new House (that she had secretly wanted to be sorted to because not only was it the house of the Boy-Who-Lived, but because all the stories she had heard regarding the four Houses of Hogwarts made it out to be the most adventurous House, and she lived for adventure; not that she was about to tell the Sorting Hat that – even though it had came out right and asked her which House she wanted to be in because that kind of defeated the whole purpose of being sorted now didn't it, and she wanted the full Hogwarts experience which meant getting somewhat psychoanalyzed by a collection of wool and magic) was seated at.

The sorting finally over, the Headmaster rose once again. "Now that the last of our students have found their places, I have a few short words: Caelum. Vocate. Navis." And with that said, he retook his seat and the formerly empty platters finally (finally!) revealed their bounty.