Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends

The Burden of Maturity

I have once again found myself in depression.

I thought I was past this.

Ever since I divorced myself from my biological mother and brother, I have been much more satisfied with my life. I've been treated with the dignity and respect that all children should be treated with. My grades have improved rather significantly and my needs are being well tended to, but why now am I just starting to feel the same way I was before again?

It can't be because I still have unresolved tensions between me and my old so called family. I have no plans on forgiving them for their failures. I put my foot down that day when I decided to run away to Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends with some assistance, and so far the place has practically been paradise. I'm finally free to be a kid here; I am finally free to laugh and play and grow at my own pace.

Most importantly, however, I am finally free to create.

At least, that's what I hoped for.

At this moment, I hardly have the energy to draw, let alone get out of my room. My best friend isn't really helping but I appreciate him for trying. He may be a troublemaker but I know that he would do anything to get me out of this funk, but nothing seemed to be working.

To tell you the truth, I know full well of what is troubling me, but I fear that my best friend simply would not understand. I fear that none of the imaginary friends would understand my dilemma. There is only one person I know that could help me; maybe she could do it. The problem, however, is that she herself is busy keeping this place running.

As luck would have it, however, this would be one of those days where I would be proven wrong. There was a knock at my door and I gave the order for whoever was there to enter. The door opened and bursting in came the excitement of both my red-haired caretaker Frankie and my sworn companion Bloo.

Frankie couldn't contain herself, "Mac! Guess what, there's a fair in town and everybody's going!"

I wish I could be happier to hear this, but my mind is so plagued with negative thoughts that I can hardly notice that she's trying to cheer me up. How rude of it was for me to ignore their attempts to put a smile on my face? I know that she was aware of my downheartedness since Bloo had to go running his mouth off as usual.

It took a while for me to respond, but I tried my best let her down gently, "That's cool, Frankie, but I'm just not feeling like it."

Both of them were not taking it as Bloo struck, "Come on, grumpy pants, you've been cooped up in this room all day! Get a load off your mind!"

If only it were that simple.

Bloo continued, "There's gonna be all sorts of rides! I wanna try out the new Barfotron 5000! It's supposed to go at least over a billion miles per hour until you puke out your insides!"

Thanks, Bloo, like I needed to hear that.

"Mac, come on, you're going. You've been locked in this room rotting away and this is gonna make you real happy, I know it," Frankie pressured me.

If only they understood that what I don't need right now is me going on rides, but a sympathetic ear.

I tried to chime in but I would quickly be interrupted, "Guys, I…"

They both yelled out, "Nobody cares! Come on!"

And just like that I was taken off my bed and out of my room and straight to the front door. I sighed as I gave into the all the enthusiasm. Was this really going to make me feel better? Even while I was being strapped into my seat on the Foster's bus, the thoughts that were haunting just kept on lingering.

It was a relatively short ride, so short in fact that I wondered how Frankie didn't get pulled over by the police. There it was, all the rides spinning and all the children cheering out in happiness. This is not what I needed, but against my will I exited the bus and we all collectively made our way to pay for our admission. I always wondered how Frankie was so loaded with cash to accommodate for everyone that was here. I guess that's one of the fortunes of being the granddaughter of an owner of an orphanage.

We started the day small and then worked our way up. Although Bloo was as impatient as ever to try that new ride, Frankie made the assurance that the best would be saved for last. The first thing we did was go to the petting zoo with Eduardo because, well, he was an animal lover.

After the petting zoo, we next hit the arcade where Wilt was scoring some major baskets with a basketball machine. Even being as lanky as he is, he always impressed me with his abilities. While we were there, he kindly handed a ball to be and wanted to me land a shot. Wilt taught me all the rules of how to play basketball and I didn't expect to catch on so quickly. With some balanced tossed, I nailed it perfectly!

Our third attraction was the dart boards and Coco was displaying some surprising talents. You're not supposed to put darts in your mouth and then spit them back out, but Coco found a way to make it work. Coco then, of all things, issued a challenge to me, betting that I couldn't pop the most balloons within the time limit. As much as I felt like I should've said otherwise, I accepted her challenge. Believe it or not, I won! My prize was a giant stuffed dinosaur and I wanted to give it Coco, but she suggested that I keep it so it could fuel my creativity some more.

We were taken to the Ferris wheel for our fourth event. The evening was just setting in but it was still young. Frankie had taken everyone to get ice cream before that and she left us for a quick second to use the restroom. I was sitting down on a bench and I decided to reflect back on everything that had happened today…as well as in the past.

Initially I wasn't as brimming with joy as he was, but the moment I laid my hand on a baby goat, I swear I could feel a bit of a load being taken off my mind like Bloo said.

My biological mother never allowed us to own a pet, and that is how she viewed my best friend. I was never allowed to so much as lay a finger on another animal even with permission. What was she afraid of? Was she afraid of germs or that I would touch inappropriately? I could just wash my hands and I know what is private!

Well, now that I've removed her from my life, I could touch whatever I wanted and pay the consequences for it later. I was now free to make my own mistakes and learn from them. She could no longer tell me what was right and what was wrong. I could find all of that out for myself now.

My so called brother would never let me have turn at anything. He would hog everything for himself and when I asked politely to let me have a try, he would do nothing except curse me out. What was his gosh darn problem? He didn't own anything!

Now that he's gone, I could finally have my turn on the swing. I could now experience everything that I had been missing out on. I could actually try and fail at something and then try again. I was free to improve my art.

Whenever I wanted something, my mother would tell me that I wasn't responsible enough for it. When I proved that I was responsible for it, my brother would just take it away from me, and what's worse is that my mother had the gall to say that this was just proving her point. Well, now they're gone both and I can take what rightfully belongs to me!

Wait...

What's that?

Is that…a teardrop?

Am I…crying?

I couldn't believe it, I was crying! These tears, they are not tears of pain, but of relief! Bloo was right, this is almost the happiest I have ever been in a very long time! However, something was still aching in my head. What was it and why was it bothering me?

Now I remember.

The answer lies in the past.

I need that answer to unlock my future.

"Mac? Buddy, you okay?"

That voice came from none other than Frankie, my adoptive guardian. She had just came back from the restroom. She must be wondering why I'm so overcome with emotion like this. She laid a gentle hand on my shoulder and we looked into each other's eyes. Who knew that our relationship would blossom in such a way?

"Bloo told me you were feeling really down in the dumps today. C'mon, let's go talk about it."

Frankie signaled for everyone to hop onto their appropriate seats. I'm surprised one seat was able to support Eduardo's weight. Frankie had setup a private seat just for me and her so we could discuss what a bothering me so. Are seat continued to rise up until we were at the very top of the wheel. I could see the sun setting from where we were and it was so beautiful.

It was then that I noticed that noticed that we weren't moving anymore. I looked down below to see that Eduardo, Wilt, Coco, and Bloo had all exited from their seats to let everyone else have a turn. They would stay down there and wait for us.

I asked to sister, "Frankie?"

She responded, "What's up, pal?"

This was it, this was finally my chance to let out some more of my pent up feelings, "Do you…like being an adult?"

For a moment I thought she was going to spill her guts out over how being an adult is the most awesome thing in the world. Surprisingly, she closed her eyes and let out a sigh. It was then she explained, "Buddy, when you're raised by someone like my grandmother, the line between adult and child becomes a bit indistinct and the terms become a bit pedantic. You know what I'm trying to say, right?"

I nodded and said, "There's no real difference?"

"Yeah." She continued, "I mean, I know I got a lot of chores to do around the house and bills to pay and whatnot, but when you do it all for the right thing, such as taking care of people who make you feel young, it's all worth it."

"I see."

"Why're you asking, pal?"

I thought about what Frankie had just said to me and felt that she had it made. She was raised to be herself. She wasn't raised to be a robot unlike me.

"Frankie, what if I told you that I didn't want to become an adult?"

Frankie let out a soft chuckle and said something I thought I would never here, "Buddy, how can you not become what you already are?"

I asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Frankie explained some more, "Mac, you are already an adult as far as I'm concerned. You're creative, you're intelligent, and…"

I interrupted by saying, "But I'm not an adult."

"Lemme finish," Frankie said. "Adults solve their problems by learning from what happened and moving on. You managed to create your own unique way of expressing that. I know you dealt with a lot of crap in your life, but didn't let that stop you from being who you wanted to be. I wish I could say the same about your mom and brother."

That was the tick that set me off, "I don't wanna hear any more about them!"

As much as I didn't mean to exclaim that, it was true, but Frankie did not chastise me because we did have this talk before I left them.

"I don't want to hear any more about those two!"

There was a brief silence until Frankie asked me, "Mac, what do you think about adults?"

I gave a glance as I was sitting down with my arms folded, "You really wanna know?"

She nodded.

I revealed to her, "Adults bother me."

What followed was not a shocked gasp or an angry outburst, but a simple question, "Why?"

I was blunt, "Because I think they're all the same. I think they're liars, enablers, and bullies."

She continued to be understanding, "What makes you say that?"

I began my elaboration, "Adults are so irresponsible. They have no accountability for what they do. They form prejudices that children never had and they spend a good chuck of their lives trying maintain some make believe system so they feel right. My mother is just one example, she was a woman who felt that she could force her way onto me because she couldn't handle when my father passed on."

I continued, "Adults enable because they're afraid of change. Let's say that there is this one guy who is different from all the rest. Outside he's different, but inside he's the same. People recoil from him because he refuses to give into the make believe norms that have been set. It's often said that if you tell a lie long enough, it eventually replaces the truth, so how is any of that right when he knows the real truth?!"

I kept on going, "I don't care about what others opine, I want the facts! Adults are afraid of the facts because they feel it threatens their worldview. Instead of looking for new ways to enrich their lives, they choose to stay cozy with their same old routines, and they stomp out all those that threaten that mediocre routine! Only a bully cites the status quo when they oppose the happiness of different people just for being different. Only a bully feels that his way is the only way when there are millions of other possibilities out there."

Frankie was listening with intent to my bombast, for even though this may not have been first she had heard this, she did not dare to interrupt.

I was still fuming, "The worst part is when we children point this out, we get casted aside and get punished. Some if not most even call us the bullies for just telling the truth! That's why some of us lie, because we fear that punishment. We lie because we fear that we may lose our individuality. Can you really blame us, though?!"

I was just about to wrap it up now, "That is all why I view maturity as nothing but a burden. Maturity means conformity, to save face. I hate it."

Wow.

That was a rant.

I sat there quietly for about a minute when I noticed that it was time for both me and Frankie to vacate our seat. Frankie helped me up and then guided back to the bench. I didn't care if I was in trouble with her, the truth needed to come out. Amazingly, though, it didn't come. Frankie wrapped one arm around me and we both looked into our eyes again.

Frankie then said, "Mac, I'll say it again, you are already on the path to maturity. You're right, there are people out there who will use and make excuses and feel that they have the right to rule over others. You and I both have never lost sight of who we are just because some people had a problem with it. We're both children at heart and we can keep it that way."

Frankie then retraced her steps, "Actually, let me rephrase that. Maturity is…it's not measured by age. When you created Bloo, you came to the realization that life is precious and fragile and just way too short to arguing over minor differences. I came to that realization when my parents died. Life and maturity are both what you make for yourself."

Frankie was right.

As I was spending more and more time with Foster's I became more alive.

That was it!

Finally, I could move on!

I wrapped my own arms around Frankie and she returned the favor by kissing me on the forehead. I could grow up whenever I darn well please! Nobody else but me could tell me when I could because it was necessary, and right now I don't feel like it!

"Thank you so much, Frankie," I expressed my gratitude.

"Anytime, pal," she returned.

After that we finally took Bloo to the Barfotron 5000…and he appropriately puked his guts out.