I do not own Twilight, and all rights go to Stephenie Meyer.

Chocolate Chocolate Chip cookies

Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Bella. Her dad, Charlie, told her to deliver the cookies he made to her boyfriend, Edward's, family. Bella gladly took the basket of cookies. Lucky her. Her truck stalled halfway to the Cullen's house in the middle of the forest. She sighed, knowing that she HAD to get the cookies to their house. They were chocolate chocolate chip, Edward's favorite. He would be heartbroken to find out that his favorite cookies never reached him. She skipped through the forest, swinging the basket gaily. Suddenly, a loud crack came from behind a bush. She peered around and saw a wolf. It looked an awful lot like her old family friend, Jacob Black. It didn't take her long to realize that it was Jacob.

"Hey Bella," Jacob greeted her.

"Hi Jacob!"

"What are you doing?" Jacob asked kindly, eyeing the woven basket Charlie had weaved.

Bella smiled, "I'm delivering this lovely basket full of chocolate chocolate chip cookies to Edward's family!"

Jacob nodded, "I see. Well, then, you'd better be off then! It's getting cold."

Bella nodded back, "Thank you Jacob."

Jacob watched her skip through the forest, I want those cookies! Chocolate chocolate chip is my favorite! He crept behind Bella until the path split, and he took the quicker route to the Cullen's house.

Knock, knock. 'Come in,' Bella heard Edward's voice answer. But it was different, it wasn't velvety. She followed the orders and stepped into the roomy home. Edward was sprawled across the couch with a large blanket covering him. Bella placed the basket on the table.

"Charlie wanted me to deliver these to you, " She looked around the quiet room, "Where's Alice and Jasper? And Rosalie and Emmet? And Esme and Carlisle?"

Edward didn't make eye contact. He grabbed the basket of cookies and devoured them. "They…um…went hunting…" His unvelvety voice answered.

Bella frowned, "My Edward… what long legs you have…"

"All the better to run with, love.""My Edward…what ugly toenails you have…"

"All the better to taste you with, love."

"Huh?"

"I mean…all the better to…run with…love…"

"Huh?"

"All the better to-"

Bella didn't let him finish, "My Edward, what a raspy voice you have!"

"All the better to…ah…WTF! ALL THE BETTER TO EAT YOUR EDWARD WITH!"

"What?!" Bella sounded alarmed. Edward popped up and faced Bella. She hadn't been talking to Edward at all. It had been Jacob on the couch all along.

"I'll eat you now too! Then you can finally be mine!" Jacob laughed.

Bella tried to run away…but…gulp! Jacob swallowed her whole. His stomach grew unusually large.

Meanwhile in Jacob's stomach…

"Have a cookie Bella," Edward said, handing Bella part of a cookie Jacob had eaten. They ate all of the cookies in his stomach in a few short bites.

Outside of Jacob's stomach…

All of the sudden, Alice walked into the house. She held a large axe in her hands, "OH NO!" She shrieked. Alice swung the axe. WHABAM!

Jacob's belly sliced open and out fell Bella and Edward.

"Oh Alice!" Bella ran over to her friend to give her a hug. Ching.

Bella fell over into her own blood. And out of her stomach fell cookies! Alice sliced open Edward too, and took the cookies up to her room, leaving Edward, Bella and Jacob to be found by Carlisle.

Moral of the Story: NEVER trust Alice when she has an axe and can smell Chocolate Chocolate chip cookies.