Disclaimer: I do not own Wicked or any of the characters mentioned in this story.
To Live a Lie
It was sad, really, knowing that her life had been nothing but a lie. From the day she was born, Galinda was expected to be so perfect and above all others. It was enough to make her sick. And yet she continued playing their games and even fought to gain her parents' non-existent approval by at least trying to act like one of the higher society. Eventually their actions clung to her subconscious, and she became one of them—a total bitch.
The day she was accepted into Shiz, however, her parents and so-called friends began to turn the blind eye. Galinda spent her last summer at home planning on how to fall back to everyone's good graces. She would go to Shiz and act the way she was taught. In truth what she really wanted to do was attend the university to improve her sorcery skills. But education was not a woman's top priority…. She decided she could do both behind their backs. What was there to lose?
Everything changed when she met Elphaba Thropp, her roommate at Shiz. Now she was the perfect role model for Galinda's true nature. Strong, powerful, outgoing… she always knew what she wanted and she didn't let anyone get in the way of her getting it. The blonde wanted so much to try to get along with her, to try to become friends with the green girl so that Elphaba could somehow save her from the mess she was already in. But no—the other girls wouldn't allow it, and she might as well listen to them.
Galinda did exactly what the society-girls did. She talked about her roommate behind her back, spread rumors, did everything she could to humiliate her. Nothing worked. Silently she thanked the Unnamed God or whoever was in charge of the cosmos for not letting anything affect her green roomie. Her joy was short-lived, however. Pfannee and ShenShen, two of her "friends" at the school, had found one of her hats and dared her to give it to Miss Elphaba. It was black, wide-brimmed, and had a pointed top. It was Galinda's most prized possessions because of its uniqueness.
And now it was going to be used to humiliate the one she so secretly admired.
Why must she be so weak?
The blonde watched in horror the next night at the Ozdust Ball as her roommate walked into the ballroom wearing a simple blue frock—obviously her best choice of clothing she had available—and the black hat that Galinda had given her. She was the only one not laughing at the green girl, she noticed. When Elphaba looked as though she was going to leave, or at least burst into tears, Galinda rushed over to her and grabbed her before she could manage a single stride. She then curtsied without a single word being spoken, and she took a hold of the green girl's hand.
With every move that they made on the dance floor, Galinda felt a strange feeling surge within her. Joy, nervousness, elation, weakness, pleasure…. She felt like she could stay within that frame of time for the rest of eternity if she wanted to, which she did. But she couldn't; it would be wrong. And it got even worse when she began to assess the true meaning of her feelings for the green girl.
She was in love with Miss Elphaba.
Galinda tried to stay as far away from her roommate as possible, driving herself into the arms of Prince Fiyero of the Arjiki Tribe in the Vinkus. It was back to the lies with her—back to the way she was supposed to be. She hated herself for lying to herself for how she truly felt about Elphaba. But it was too wrong to love someone like her. And yet it felt so right at the same time….
No, she couldn't think like this! Elphaba was a woman, like she was. A woman could never be in love with another woman; there were laws against it, laws that could mean instant death if their relationship was discovered. No, there is no relationship between you and that green creature! Galinda's mind screamed, though her heart wept for the opposite to be true. Even if you did love her, she could never return your feelings. She's heartless, soulless… she's not even human!
She would cry every night when she felt this inevitable longing to be beside her roommate. It isn't right, she tried telling herself, but her heart still ached for Elphaba. Galinda went to Madame Morrible on occasion to have her board with someone else. Unfortunately the Headmistress of the university would remind her that there were no other places for her except for in the Pink Dorm, which held at least fifteen other girls. And so she was forced to stay with the green girl, suffering all the more.
If only she was prepared for what came next.
"Come with me… to the Emerald City, Glinda."
It was like Elphaba was trying to run a knife through her, to end her misery once and for all. It was too painful…. And yet she felt like she had to go with her. There was nothing else she could do—she had the feeling that her roommate would force her to go whether she agreed to or not. And she did. Before she knew it, they had already left Shiz without a word to anyone else, leaving to set up a meeting with the Wizard that would probably never happen.
Glinda nearly died at the devotion and protectiveness of her that Elphaba had shown throughout the week-long trip to the City of Emeralds. She would always snap at some fool boy or anyone else who would come within two feet of the blonde, bringing her closer to her own green body protectively when they would not take a hint. Something told her that Elphaba was just acting on instinct—she had lived all of her life tending to her armless younger sister, Nessarose. But she couldn't help but hope that maybe the green girl felt something more towards her.
They did manage to land a meeting to the Wizard. It was a mere four minutes—whoever could actually carry a four-minute conversation with anyone had Glinda's immediate respect—but it was enough to get Elphaba's point across. As Glinda waited in the carriage that night for her green roommate to return, she began to think. It was about time that she got rid of this façade and lived the way she wanted to live. She decided that she was going to go against everything she was ever told. She was going to confess everything, thrown everything away. She was finally going to tell Elphaba that she loved her.
But her chance was lost. Elphaba was sending her back to Shiz without her. Glinda tried to reason with her, tried getting her to come back with her, to get in the carriage with her and never leave her—she couldn't leave her! But the green girl sadly refused. "Hold out, Glinda, if you can," Elphaba said before kissing her softly. "Hold out, my sweet," and she kissed her again before letting her go. Glinda wanted to yell at her, to say the words that she had been dying to say ever since the Ozdust Ball, but her voice died in her throat as her tears fell.
Twenty years had passed and not a thing had changed. Sure, Glinda was married to a baronet, but anything other than that was never altered. She still did as others told her to, she still acted as society did… she still loved Elphaba with all her heart. Her husband never caught on to her secret desires for the green woman—the Wicked Witch of the West, as everyone called her now—and for this she was glad. Her love for Elphaba was the only shard left of her true self that had not been torn asunder by the press and people of Oz.
Glinda was thrilled to see her again despite the sadness of the circumstances—the death of Elphaba's sister, the Wicked Witch of the West. But the green woman didn't seem to be all that depressed or even worried about her sister's demise. She looked equally glad to see her old friend, and she told her so. "You look as gorgeous as ever," she commented, making the blonde blush.
They quickly caught up to things in each other's lives. Elphaba was single—she was never one to think of marriage as an option, and who would marry a green person, anyway?—and she was just as behind in the latest fashion trends as she ever was, so don't even go there. Glinda was surprised to hear that her words became rushed when she talked to her old friend and she became tongue-tied on occasion during their bouts of conversation; she hadn't felt that way since Shiz! And the green woman also seemed a bit nervous as well. Maybe there was still hope after all….
The blonde took a deep breath and moved closer to the Witch. She opened her mouth to say the words that had formed on her tongue and in her mind, but they were torn away just as quickly. Glinda felt the Witch place a hand on the small of her back, pressing her gently to her own body before she claimed her pink lips with her own. The blonde found herself become breathless as the kiss progressed; she slipped her tongue into Elphaba's slightly parted lips, kissing her back with as much passion as she could muster. "I love you," the green girl whispered in her ear before kissing right below her earlobe. "I've always loved you, Glinda—ever since the very beginning."
Glinda's eyes welled with tears as she clung to Elphaba's body, letting her tears fall against the scratchy fabric of the black dress her friend wore. "I love you," she repeated over and over again, like a prayer that would somehow save her from destruction. But that was before the Gale Force pulled them apart, before everything fell to shambles. She cried out to Elphaba in panic, but her voice was drowned out by the shouts of men. They tried pulling the green woman away from the area, away from their so-called "Glinda the Good", but the Witch resisted, pulled herself towards the blonde.
Her attempts were futile.
Glinda could feel the tears burn in her eyes as she watched the guards try to haul away the woman she loved. She was the only one free to move, but she found herself rooted to the spot, speechless. Tell them! her heart screamed. Let them know that she isn't evil—it's all a lie! But once again her mind won over her heart, and the only thing she could do was watch as they dragged her away…. But then Elphaba finally broke free and used that broom of hers to fly off.
After that, Glinda was once again pulled back into the life of lies that it seemed she was born into. Fake smiles, fake cheeriness… nothing seemed real to her anymore. She could never walk out in the streets anymore without someone recognizing her, and even then it was all another part of her created by others. "Glinda the Good," the citizens of Oz called her. What food had she ever done in her life? Nothing except pleasing everyone but herself. That and they had to pick someone to play the part of the Witch's enemy. Why not put two friends against each other?
Of course, they don't know that we used to be friends, the reasonable side of herself said, and like so many other times Glinda gave in to it.
The blonde couldn't help but think of the green woman from time to time, wondering if she was okay. Ever since the kiss they shared, Glinda's thoughts and emotions had been mixed up. She hoped to one day break away from the people and the media, divorce her husband, and set up a life with Elphaba if she really did mean what she said. Those three little words made a big difference in Glinda's life, and they were the only ones that gave her the will to live.
"I love you…."
The next time the two met, however, was under very dangerous circumstances. Glinda went to her friend to warn her of the rebellious citizens—the so-called Witch Hunters. They were coming to kill her. "You must get out of here," the blonde pleaded, but the Witch refused. Elphaba told her not to try to clear her name, fearing that they might turn against her as well. "I don't care!" Glinda cried. "I don't want to leave you. I love you, Elphie."
Glinda saw Elphaba smile sadly at her. She got the legendary Grimmerie from her desk and handed it to the blonde. "Take this," she said. "Try to learn the language—it'll help you later on in life, I'm sure of it." She then pulled her friend into her arms and kissed the top of her head. "Hold out, Glinda. Try to hold out for me…."
The blonde turned her head up so that she could press her lips against Elphaba's in what looked to be their last kiss. Glinda wanted to hold onto her forever, to never let go. She wished that all of this was just some horrible nightmare and that they were back at Shiz, back to where all of this started, and they could live their lives as normally as ever. All she ever wanted was a normal life!
The beating on the door caused them to break away. Elphaba quickly pulled the crying blonde into an empty wardrobe, keeping it open only a crack by mistake. Glinda could only watch in panic as the door was knocked off its hinges, letting a mob of people flow through. A small brunette girl led them, holding a bucket of water in her hands. The blonde's heart began to race when she saw her Elphie's look of anger transform instantly into fear.
The girl took the bucket and flung the water in Elphaba's direction. The moment the water hit her, the green woman let out a deafening screech of pain…. Moments later, it was over. The people cried out in sudden celebration—the Wicked Witch was dead at long last! They followed the girl out of the room, singing and chanting in glee and merriment.
Glinda made sure they were gone before she even dared to come out of the wardrobe. What she saw made her heart split in two—nothing remained but Elphaba's hat and the fabric of her dress. The blonde fell to her knees, taking the hat into her arms and holding it to her chest as the tears and sadness took over her. How could people be so cruel? Elphie didn't do anything to deserve death! I'm the one to blame, Glinda thought. I'm the one who should have died. I'm the wicked one, not her!
And for the first time in her life, she didn't have to lie.
