Okay, this is the first time I've ever written for iCarly, even though I've always wanted to. Watching iGo to Japan sort of forced me to write this though. This story is inspired by the scene in the car where Freddy questions why Sam has underwear with I Heart Las Vegas on the butt and she tells him to stay out of her suitcase. Then he says that he wasn't in her suitcase. The dirty thoughts that followed led to this story.
iShould Have Closed My Eyes
I can't sleep. It's not like I can't fall asleep on a boat or anything. I just can't clear my mind enough to sleep.
It doesn't help that Sam is half asleep on my shoulder. I know she's not completely asleep because I can hear the clicking as she skips songs on her iPod.
Carly and Spencer are both asleep, and mom is on the deck, most likely puking. I'm amazed she let me out of her sight, even for this long.
I was messing around on the iCarly page, doing miscellaneous housekeeping procedures, and kept stopping to watch the old vids.
Had Sam really always looked that amazing?
I shouldn't be thinking that. I mean, I'd always liked Carly, like, ALWAYS. Why was I suddenly in love with the bane of my existence?
I should have closed my eyes.
Okay, that makes absolutely no sense. No-one outside my mind has any idea what I'm talking about. I'm talking about that first night in Japan.
I really need to learn how to knock, seriously; because that first night, I walked in on Sam changing. I mean, I didn't see much; a bathing suit would have covered less, butt it's the principle of the thing.
Butt? Wow, I really do have one of those one-track guy minds.
Just as I start thinking about Sam's butt and those hot 'I Heart Las Vegas' panties, she stirs. I watch as she takes her headphones out and looks at me. I feel my heart stop for a second before it slowly starts ticking again. That had NEVER happened with Carly.
"How did you know I had those Vegas panties?" she asks. For a second I fear that she can read minds, but then the rational side takes over and I look for a normal explanation.
"How do you even remember that?"
She holds up the iPod and I can see Viva Las Vegas scroll across the screen.
"That and it's kind of been dwelling on my mind. You said you weren't going through my suitcase."
"I swear I wasn't!"
"I know that. You may be a dweeb and a geek, but you're not a pervert, and you're definitely not a liar. So how did you know?"
"So did you like Japan?" I say, knowing my changing of subject is completely transparent.
"Don't try to change the subject Fredward. Why do you know what is written on the butt of my underpants?"
I close the laptop and bite my lip. How do I tell her?
"You know when you were changing our room because Carly was in the bathroom?"
"Um, yeah, I guess?"
"Well, I was in our bathroom, and when you came in to change, nobody told me."
"I have a bad feeling I know where this is going…"
"And I sort of walked in on you. You were turned around so you didn't see me."
"How much did you see?" she asked, sort of fearfully.
"Nothing really. Just the underwear and a tank top."
"You saw me in my underwear, and you didn't plan on telling me?"
"Actually, I was hoping you'd forgotten and I could take it to my grave. I didn't think that you've been thinking about it as much as I have."
"Wait a minute, you've actually been THINKING about this?! Maybe I was wrong about you being a perv…"
"Not so much your butt," she shoots a glare at me. "Okay, your butt, but sort of, the fact that I can't forget about it."
"Am I getting you right now? You've been thinking about…us? As like…a thing?"
"Don't sound so disgusted, okay?"
"I'm not as disgusted as I am…shocked. It couldn't work could it, I mean, we're complete opposites," she was denouncing it, but at the same time she leaned toward me.
"They say that opposites attract, you know," I said encouragingly. I'm still kind of amazed she was considering this.
"You're a geek. Isn't there some way to test it?"
I'm not sure she'd like my idea, "Well, there's one."
"What's that?"
Well, here I go.
In seconds my lips were on hers and I was pulling her closer and everything was about to explode. I could see fireworks behind my eyelids, and my skin was burning. She wasn't resisting. If anything, she was more into this than I was.
I pulled away, lacking the breath to continue. I looked at her and I knew it had worked.
Without trying to be smug, okay, I was trying to be smug I whispered, "I think the test was a success."
"Really? Ya think?" she said smacking my head. I knew she was being flirtatious though, because she was blushing. That, and the fact that the hit didn't bring tears for once.
I looked over at Carly and back at Sam, "How are we going to tell her?"
She reached into my hoodie pocket where I kept my camcorder and pulled it out.
"I have an idea…"
-
"I love random dancing, don't you Sam?" Carly asked as we started to wrap up our first webcast since coming back from Japan.
"Of course, random dancing and pudding; best things in the world!"
Sam winked at me and we both smiled as she announced, "This is a new segment we like to call iSam&Freddie."
Sam turned toward the screen and Carly looked like she had no idea what was happening. Well, she didn't, actually. We had to break the news to her somehow.
I saw as our faces flashed on to the screen. Not my best job as a filmmaker, but we were in a rocking boat.
"Hey, this is Sam," I said, pointing to her.
"And this is Fredward!" I remembered glaring at her. "Fine, this is Freddie"
"We've been meaning to tell Carly something that she missed on the way home from Japan," Carly started looking at us, and I moved up to stand next to Sam. I put my arm on her shoulders and Carly looked like her eyes were about to bulge out from her sockets.
The camera went to show Carly asleep on Spencer's shoulder and then it came back to us.
"Well, Sam has this pair of Las Vegas underwear," my on-camera voice said.
"And Freddie, has no sense of privacy," followed-up hers.
"So, put into few words…" both my on-camera and real-life selves took their cue and kissed Sam.
Both of our faces looked at the camera as Sam pushed the 'Awww' button, and the on-screen voices finished.
"This is my girlfriend, Sam"
"And this is my boyfriend, Freddie. Seddie out!"
We left the camera shot, but you could still hear murmering, "What the hell is Seddie?"
"It's a couple name, don't you get it?"
"Why do we need a couple name?"
"Because we're a couple doofus."
"But Seddie, why can't it be Fam?"
"Because that sounds ridiculous. Hey Fredward, what's that red light for?"
"Crap, the camera's still o—"
The show came back to the studio as soon as the tape stopped rolling. Carly was frozen, so Sam and I closed the show.
"This is Sam and Freddie, and Carly…Thanks for watching iCarlySam&Freddie!"
-
By the time we made it to the bottom of the elevator, Spencer was standing there repeating, "Sam, Freddie, Sam, Freddie…"
Worse, my mother was there. Boy did she look mad…
"Fredward Benson, you are coming home with me this instant!"
"Mom!"
"Fredward…"
I looked at Sam one more time and we both smiled. It would all work out eventually.
"Bye guys. Bye Sam…" I blew her a kiss, which infuriated my mother.
"Fredward!"
"I'm coming mom."
And I knew that whatever, my mother, or Carly could do to me, Sam was worth it.
So guys, tell me if my attempt at iCarly was worth it. I love Seddie! Reviews are much appreciated!