Then Kurt got it in the butt.
"Ding dong!" Blaine Screamed.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. It was Tina. "Um, Tina, you're kind of interrupting something." Kurt announced, still getting it aggressively up the bum-bum. Tina ignored Kurt and walked into their room holding vapor and ass-less chaps."Put these on." Tina instructed Kurt, throwing the chaps at him. Tina then grabbed the vapor and looked at Blaine. Blaine gave Tina a horrified look, still giving it to Kurt up the bum-bum.
Blaine awoke with a jump. It was the vapor dream again. He had fallen asleep while watching "Broke Back Mountain" for the ninth time this week. He always seemed to doze off part way through, causing his dreams to be riddled with sexy cowboy foreplay. Only recently had Tina 'rubbed' her way in there via vapor, spoiling his sexual fantasies. Blaine sat up straight on the couch and reached for the remote to turn off the TV that was now just scrolling credits. He got off the couch with a stretch and decided he needed a cold shower as he made his way to the bathroom. When Blaine had reached the bathroom he pushed the door open and turned on the light. He walked on the cold tile as he made his way to the mirror that hung above the sink. Blain enjoyed looking into the mirror. "I swear these eyebrows could win an Oscar." Blaine went to smooth his perfect triangular eyebrows, but noticed there was something wrong…There was an eyebrow that was unwanted and out of place. Quickly, Blaine opened the medicine cabinet and rummaged through the types of hair products to find his $1,000 tweezers, but before he found his tweezers he found…vapor. He froze up. He didn't remember leaving vapor there. In fact, he didn't own any.
"Kurt!" He called out.
Kurt hurried into the bathroom. "What?"
Blaine raised a trembling finger towards the vapor. "I-Is this yours?"
"No." Kurt said, the same terrified expression plastered on his face.
They both gawked at the small container. Thy knew this could only mean one thing… Tina was there, where? Blaine and Kurt didn't know. "Kurt, stay here it's me she wants. If you hears any screams—don't leave this bathroom," Blaine walked to the door and grabbed the knob, and looked at Kurt. "Ding Dong." Blaine Whispered.
Blaine Quickly opened the bathroom door and shut it behind him. "Tina?" Blaine called, but there was no response, "Tina." He called still no response. He walked into the living room, and before he got too far in there was a scream—it was Kurt. Blaine rushed to the bathroom and kicked down the door because knobs were to five minutes ago. To Blaine's surprise, Tina wasn't there…it was Sebastian. Sebastian was giving Kurt a patriotic wedgie, which surprisingly made him look more American.
"Sebastian, what the actual fuck?" Kurt hollered as he hung from his sparkly green undies. Sebastian just laughed at Kurt's compromising position.
"Put him down!" Blaine ordered.
"Not until Casper the Pasty Ghost here admits that he is not worthy enough for you or your immaculate obtuse eyebrows." Sebastian snickered.
Without any warning, Blaine lunged for the aggressor. His fist made contact with Sebastian's cheekbone, taking him down in one swift punch. Kurt broke free and went to his fiancés side, attempting to unwedge his underwear. Sebastian laid motionless at their feet. Blaine leaned down and whispered in his ear, "That's why they call me Blain 'The Pain' Anderson, fuck wagon."
"Not the only reason!" Kurt joked, but honestly it wasn't a joke ask Kurt's anus. As Blaine and Kurt laughed Carole came in the bathroom.
"Carole, what are you doing here?" Kurt asked. She didn't respond, she just grabbed Sebastian's leg and started to drag his limp body out of the room.
"Carole?" Blaine questioned.
"I need this." Carole stated.
"For what?" Kurt asked.
"Shhhh, don't ask." Carole slowly left the room.
"We really need to change the locks on our door." Kurt shrugged and smacked Blaine's bodacious booty. Blaine's tummy rubble," Boy am I hungry!" "You wanna go out and get something to eat?" Kurt asked.
"Why not."