Uchiha Uzume.

My Mother said I was named after a goddess of fertility, Ame-no-Uzume.

Right from birth, my parents had expectations, it seemed.

To accompany my name, my Father said I will be the bridge between the Clan and the Village, the night before I entered the academy.

If I could sigh in front of his face when he said that, I would. But I was too tired that night (it was after training), so I only nodded and went to my room like the good heiress I was.

Not.

"Yume-chan, did you go off to your own world again?"

I glanced at my back and found Shisui standing there looking at me. Not once could I change his mind to call me 'Uzume'. I had protested that Yume was not even my name, however, it seemed there's no changing his playful mind. He was quite peculiar, that one, even back when we were four. It's my fault that the first meeting between him and I was when I was daydreaming. I had accepted that I was stuck with the nickname since then.

Grudgingly, of course.

"Is there a problem with that, Meikyō (clear/polished mirror)?" I did make a nickname for him out of spite. I actually liked his name, but he was practically asking for it when he went ahead nicknaming me 'Dream' with a cutesy -chan attached to it. His name was written in Katakana シスイ, but I would pick 止水 if I had to choose the kanji. I quite liked the phrase 明鏡止水 (meikyō shisui: clear and serene as a polished mirror and still water) back then when I was still in Japan, and that's where I got his nickname. "You know my only hobby is this or training."

He chuckled and plopped down next to me.

"It's dangerous you know. You can forget reality if you kept that hobby of yours."

Oh, Shisui. You didn't know the half of it. I already halfway through losing my sight of reality, and sometimes I couldn't tell if you were real. I would never tell anyone, even you, my closest friend. Sometimes it's nice to ignore the absence of my sanity with daydreaming and trying to remember my past life.

I don't want you to worry, my mind whispered.

I shrugged my shoulders and said, "I will stop someday." No promises.

I heard him sigh and I felt a bit bad for making him worry.

"Did your mission went south?"

I pressed my lips together, my stomach dropped.

I couldn't lie to him so I nodded. I knew he wouldn't ask the details. ANBU are not, under any circumstances, give details of their missions aside from the Hokage or the Jōnin commander, unless ordered or permitted so.

Entering ANBU was only for appeasing the Clan and for keeping their reach off of my brother. I had to enter to shield him from becoming the boy who would be pressured until he gave out and his only option was to massacre his own kin.

Not on my watch. I would not allow it, over my cold dead body.

Something called me to activate my Sharingan, and I did so without hesitation. The moon was up on the sky, and it's quite beautiful if only I hadn't known that a literal goddess was locked up there because she went mad.

Nevertheless, I appreciated the beauty of the sight. It was a full moon and the moon actually glowed red.

I used my Sharingan to memorize the rare sight.

What a fitting scene for someone like me.

Assassinating the Hokage and his elders took quite a lot of my mental health.

Oh, it's not an order. I did it on my own volition.

"Took my advice quite literally, Uzume-kun? As your leader, I'm sorry it has come to this, but please protect the peace, this village, my people, my beloved children."

"I understand, Sandaime-sama. I will do it even without your request."

To protect, one must sacrifice something.

I did it as a Shinobi. And Shinobi is one who endures.

Even if betraying the oath I made when I took orders from the Sandaime.

Shisui might suspect, but he wouldn't, couldn't rat me out. He, in fact, would see the benefits from it, no matter how cold-hearted it sounded.

Tomorrow would be the day they announced that the Hokage was missing.

I knew the Hokage candidate were either Jiraiya, Senju Tsunade, or Hatake Kakashi. It's full of Senju influenced candidates, however, if I played my cards right, there will be an Uchiha Hokage by the next full moon.

As I tore my eyes from the red, angry moon, I kissed my best friend's cheek, careful to not make it like I was forcing myself on him. This is my first real attempt at showing my pathetic crush on him. It was a tradition here for the man to move first, but I had enough of holding back. I couldn't meet his gaze as I stood, silently bid my goodbye as I use Kamui to get away.

I hoped he didn't see the desperation etched deeply in my eyes as I left.

"I recommend Shunshin no Shisui, Daimyō-sama."

I joined in on the meeting between the daimyō, his advisors, the ANBU commander, and the Jōnin commander. I was here as Nara Shikaku's trusted Jōnin.

Shikaku would be the one who recommended Shisui. I talked to him to see the reasons behind it, as 瞬身のシスイ (Shunshin no Shisui: Shisui of the Body Flicker) was as famous as 黄色い閃光 (Kiiroi Senkou: Yellow Flash, Namikaze Minato) already. No one seemed to know this, but before he mastered Hiraishin, the Yondaime was famous for his quick use of Shunshin.

Uchiha Shisui was seventeen and a bit young to take such responsibility, but I trusted his skills in not messing everything up when he became Hokage.

I wanted peace, and I had the feeling he would do everything he could to achieve it.

Sarutobi Hiruzen and his advisors wouldn't allow it to take place. I could see it. They were raised in the middle of the First Great Ninja War and lived through the Third. Anyone lived that long would end up mad for they saw the darkness for like, six decades of their lives. Hell, Danzō even went as far as implanting Senju Hashirama's cell into his right arms and a... handful of sharingan on it.

Out of four people I had erased from this plane of existence, it was only Danzō that I had completely burned and throw its ashes away. Sandaime and his teammates? Completely disappeared.

Yeah, sue me. I couldn't leave their corpses behind, alright? Otherwise, it would cause even more uproar that the Hokage and his dynasty-like throne were assassinated. The disappearing act was more acceptable in this Shinobi World.

"Uzume."

The tone Shisui use was so odd, I actually checked his chakra signature to see if he was, well, Shisui.

"Yes?"

"... you," Shisui sounded like he was fighting himself inside. "Why?" He gritted out, eventually, with a tone that made my heart broken just by hearing it.

There was only one word that I could think of.

"For peace."

I couldn't believe the tears that suddenly flowed down my cheeks. I thought I was better than this. I thought, I thought I could hide the emptiness inside me. I thought I could hide the feeling of helplessness from the world.

The world.

Shisui looked grim, head bowed down in what seemingly exasperation and...

... understanding.

I broke down in front of him, while the sky was weeping for the failure that I was.

Someday I would tell him, for he was my best friend, my confidant, my crush, and the person I had become to trust so much.

I'm sorry.