Author's note:

Hi, there. :) So this is my first fanfiction ever. I always imagine what is going on with my favorite TV characters, but I have never actually written anything so I really don't know if this thing is even good. Anyway, this is my take on what could happen after "THE LAST FOUR WORDS".

'Mom'

'Yeah'

'I'm pregnant'

My mom just stood there looking at me. I could see it on her face that she was trying to find something to say. She opened her mouth a few times and closed it without saying a word. A small crinkle formed between her brows.

'But… but… how?' she asked at last.

'Seriously? Do I really need to tell you how that happens?'

'No, no, no.' She fastly refused. 'I don't need the glory details, but I thought you haven't seen Paul in a while?' Mom looked at me. Kind of embarrassed I looked down.

'It's not Paul's.' I murmured quietly under my nose.

'Then who?' Mom asked. In a few seconds I looked up, met her eyes and gave her a guilty smile. 'Oh!' Realization dawning on her. 'Oooh!' Mom straightened up a little, her shoulders back she looked at the town before us. 'When did that happen? I thought you ended things with him.' Mom asked without looking at me. I could hear it in her voice. The judging. A looked down once again.

'A few weeks ago.' I sighed. I rubbed my palms together a few times before continuing the story. 'After you and I had that fight at the cemetery I called him. I really don't know why. I mean by that time Odette was already living with him and I haven't talked to him in a while. I guess I just I knew that he could calm me down and somehow make me feel better. He's always been good at that. And I knew he would support me writing that book.' I paused for a few seconds. Mom turned her head towards me, but before she could say anything I started again. 'I called him and I knew she was there so I gathered every little bit of strength that I had in me and "broke up" with him. About a week later he showed up here, out of the blue if I may add, with the boys. A Life and Death Brigade Wizard of Oz themed stunt just for me. We went around town in costumes, shoot some golf balls off the roofs,…'

'That was you?' Mom interrupted me.

'Yeah' I confirmed.

'You know Taylor is still looking for "whoever committed that atrocious crime" as he put it?' She asked me with an evil glint in her eye.

'Yeah, I know.'

'You gonna come forward?'

I looked at her as if she'd just grown two heads and laughed at the notion.

'Are you crazy?'

'That's my girl.' She smiled at me and I smiled back. In a few seconds her face turned serious again. 'So how did you get from shooting golf balls of the roof to being pregnant?'

'We didn't stay in town long. We watched Kirk's movie and then hit the road. We went to a Tango club god knows where, which Colin ended up buying. We danced a little …'

'You tangoed?' Mom asked surprised.

'Would you stop interrupting me?' I asked her, faking annoyance.

'Sorry.' She apologized with small voice and ashamed look on her face. I smiled a little at her and continued.

'As I was saying, we danced a little, we drank a little and we talked. He wanted to give me a key to his family's house in Maine to go write the book, but I didn't accept. I asked him about Odette and if he was really going to marry her, but he just said that that was the "dynastic plan".' I frowned at those last words. I never liked the sound of them. And by the mirroring look on mom's face, she didn't either. ' We stayed at the club a while more and then we left. We somehow ended up in an inn in New Hampshire. He and the boys bought out the whole joint, so it was just us. He got us separate rooms, but I didn't want to be away from him, because I knew that this really was our last goodbye. So I went up with him and we spent one last magical night together. On the next morning I knew they had more plans, but I also knew that if I didn't leave know I never will. So I kind of said my goodbyes as fast as I could, I got a car and went back home.' I finished and placed my head in my hands. Even now I was fighting the tears. My heart was breaking. I felt moms hand coming onto my back stroking it. It felt good. I took a deep breath and looked sideways towards her. 'You know I could see the tears in his eyes when he finally realized that that was it. There was no going back. It broke my heart into a million little pieces.' A single tear came down my cheek.

'You love him.' She pointed out.

'I do. I really do.' I finally admitted to myself.

'Then why are you not with him?' Mom asked me. I looked at her baffled. Did she forget about that little thing called Odette? 'I don't mean why are not with him right now. But why did you even enter in that false relationship with him in the first place. You clearly both still have feelings for each other. And knowing Logan, true as little as I do, but the boy I got to know almost ten years ago, would never go for that sort of thing. So what happened?' She asked me probably the most difficult of all questions.

'I don't know.' I admitted. 'When I ran into him two years ago in Hamburg he wasn't engaged. True I had Paul, but we didn't see each other that often and let's be honest, I never really loved him. Sometimes I don't even know why I was with him in the first place. And believe me I know how horrible that sounds. So I ran into Logan, we slept together and on the next day we came up with this Vegas agreement. When we are together, we are together, when we are not, we're not.'

'But why?' Mom asked still not understanding. To be totally honest, I didn't understand it now either. It made no sense at all.

'I don't know. I was travelling a lot, he was travelling a lot, I had Paul. I don't know. Seemed like a good idea at the time.' I placed my head in my hands again. I felt defeated. 'I should have just asked him to be with me right then and there and broke up with Paul and none of this would be happening now.'

'So what now? Are you going to tell him?'

'I went and talked to dad about it. I didn't tell him I was pregnant, I passed it as if I wanted to talk to him about the book, but in reality I wanted to know how he felt about you raising me alone.' I straightened up and looked at mom with tears in my eyes. 'I can't do this alone mom. This wasn't supposed to happen like that. I'm not even sure I want to keep it.' At that last sentence I looked down, afraid of what I was going to see in my mother's eyes.

'Oh, honey. You're not alone.' She started stroking my back again. 'You have me and Luke and those other people around you that love you so much.' I smiled a little at that thought. 'You even have Paris.' My mom said and I couldn't help but laugh. I stood there looking at the ground before I whispered:

'But I don't have him.'

Mom had nothing to say to that. And neither had I. We just sat on the steps of the gazebo in silence, with her hand stroking soothingly my back.

'I don't mean to be rude here or judgmental…' mom trailed off, 'but haven't you guys ever heard of birth control? I thought I told you a long time ago to never leave it to the guy.' I sighed. I was waiting for that exact question from the moment I told her I was pregnant. I was surprised it took her this long.

'I don't and we have. And we've been safe. I don't know what happened.' And looked at her and she was looking at me expectantly. She was waiting for me to elaborate. 'I'm on a birth control shot. Have been for a few years now. I went in to get a new one and ….' I shrugged. 'Surprise, surprise.' I said with a wry smile. 'My doctor said that probably I burned trough it or something faster. She says it happens sometimes. Rarely, but happens.'

'What about condoms?' Mom asked next. I looked away from her. I wasn't sure if I wanted to answer that question, because I knew she wouldn't like it. Not a bit.

'Actually Logan and I have never used condoms. Not since that first few months before we officially started dating.' I answered not looking at her, playing with my thumbs. I felt her hand fall from where it was on my back.

'Oh… wow.' Was the only thing mom said.

'We always relied on pills, or patches, or… shots. And before now I've never had a problem.' I said, still not looking at her.

'Ok. But what about diseases and STDs?' I could hear she wasn't very pleased with me right at this moment.

'Logan's clean. I trust him. And I haven't done that with anyone else. Ever. Just Logan.'

'Oh.' Was again the only thing she said.

'Yeah.' I didn't know what else to say. The silence between us dragged on for a while. Non of us knowing to say next.

'You need to tell him, hun.' Mom said the thing I was most afraid of, but knew very well nonetheless.

'I know. And I will. Just not right now. I'm not ready yet.' I answered and she nodded. 'I'm not exactly sure how to tell my almost married ex-almost-fiancé that I'm pregnant with his child.' I confessed and me and mom both laughed at how absurd that sentence sounded. The silence went on again. 'Let's go get ready for your wedding, okay?' I said when I couldn't take it any longer. Mom just looked at me for a while, searching my face for any major distress indication and when she saw that I was more or less okay for now, she reluctantly agreed. So we got up and headed home.

The wedding was beautiful and went on without a hitch. Grandma arrived from Nantucket, just as we got home early in the morning, so she could help with whatever she could. Turned out that Kiefer Sutherland really did show up. I had to pinch myself a few times just to be sure it was really him. He danced with the bride and then with me. I suspect Luke put him up to that. I nearly fainted. Miss Patty and Babette were all over him at one point, but I took pity on the guy and took him away from their dirty old palms. We talked for a while about books and movies. Turns out he read a lot of my stuff. I guess Luke pointed me out to him on one of their fishing trips and he kept an eye out for my pieces. He liked them, or so he said, which was nice.

Everybody was having fun. There was a lot of dancing, a lot of drinking, a lot of food. Sookie had definitely outdone herself with the foot this time. Everything was extremely delicious and the cake was just divine. Kirk received well deserved praises for his decorations. Mom looked radiant and Luke couldn't keep his eyes off her. Neither could she. They never parted, not ever for a second, the whole evening.

I was watching from them from my seat at the table and couldn't help but smile at how happy they looked. And at the same time I couldn't help but think about Logan. I wondered what was he doing right now. Where was he? Was he already married? I mean it has been five weeks since I last saw him. I lot can happen in five weeks. Right after I left him in New Hampshire I disabled my Google alert on him. I didn't think I have it in me to see all those wedding photos that would no doubt fill up the tabloids. But then again if he did indeed got married, I would have heard about it somehow. I looked down at my still flat belly and placed my hands over it. I knew I had to tell Logan, I just didn't know how. This isn't something you just blurt over the phone, or write an email about. I also wasn't sure what to expect from him. I knew that most likely wouldn't be happy or thrilled about it but other than that I had no clue. Would he be angry. Would he blame me. I doubted that, but a girl in my situation never knows. The only thing I knew with absolute certainty is that I needed to make decision about this baby and couldn't do it without Logan. And not just because it was his baby. It was because I always needed him, his input when I needed to make big decisions about my life. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see mom behind me.

'You ok, hun?' She asked me looking concerned. I turned my head forward and just stared into nothing in particular. After a few seconds of contemplating my options I made my decision.

'I'm going to London.'

So? What do you think? Should I continue or should I just drop it and we never have to speak of this again? Reviews are highly appreciated.