Chapter One
My Monologue
If you were given a chance to find true love, would you take the risk? Leave your love ones behind to be with them? What if it turns out to be someone from your past, someone who loved you? Not to mention she much younger than you. Well I guess you could say that was me, in a way.
It's been twenty seven hundred years, and one hundred and ninety self induced reincarnations. Face after face always different to the next, each more foreign than the ninth. Adventure after adventure running for my life but always coming back empty and alone, without you by my side. Each time my hearts broke more than the first.
When exactly was it when I fell in love with you? Was it when you smile at me after a visit with Ricky or your mum, or was it the simple fact that you always come back. No that's not it, that's what keep me in love with you. Was it the fact that you would risk your human life with me every single day? Or that you came back to me even though I sent you out of harms reach. But will you take me back? Probably not, not after I left you like that with a broken heart. A heart that I broke, 'Oh, god what have I done?'
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I think I've finally done it, I have cracked my deoxyribonucleic acid, finally I can choose. I can choose my attributes. I can be with you again. This will be my one hundred and ninety fist reincarnation. All I have to do is drink this drink, no poison, that's still not right it's more the elixir of my life. For you my Rose are my life. It's to you I drink, 'Cheers.'
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Has it worked am I able to return to you. Yes, yes it has worked. 'I am me.' I'm slightly paler, and on the skinny side, exactly it's more like on the skin and bone side of things. But that's okay, I am me, I just need to eat something and go for a nice quiet walk. Now more than ever do I like my big teapot ears, and just goofy looking grin. But is it enough to get you back? I can only hope.
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The co-ordinates are set for Cardiff, Earth, June 18, 13 hundred hours and 15 minutes. The day I made the worst mistake of my life, nothing felt quite right after I... after you were gone. There was always something tugging, nagging for me to return to you. But I was afraid and ashamed of what I've done. Knowing the heart ache I most have caused you only broke mine even more. I was so stupid, I was too afraid of this feeling to do anything but push you away from me. It's my greatest flaw. I've never been the domestic kind of guy. You out of all of them knew this the best; you never really pushed it, and always gave me the space I needed. I should have known better, you were never one to hide your emotions, for too long. I knew it was coming for a while, I saw the timid look you gave when you thought I wasn't looking. Even then when I shied away trying to shield my feelings for you found way to make it clear that you know.
'Rose my beautiful Rose how could I be so cruel?'
I promised to protect you from harm, but in the end I was the one who caused you the greatest wound for all, a broken heart. God, how could I have been so heartless. I loved, yes loved you from the moment we meet.
'So why did I push you away? What was I afraid of love ... death ... your death ... no!'
Who am I kidding? Your human you only live a hundred years at the most. Even if you never meant to leave me behind you always will. If my people were still alive something could have been done, but they're not, they're gone, you're gone. I always end up alone.
Rose I've missed you so much, I can only wait until we meet again. I only hope I'll be there in time. I can't even imagine how it would feel to be left by some one you loved. Some one who loved you but never it clear enough to be heard.
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If know what to listen for a could hear the TRADIS fading in and out, arriving in at the location of Cardiff, Earth, June 18, 13 hundred hours and 15 minutes.