A/N: Because I needed them to have one final closing scene. =) This is coming after B left the Columbia girls on the street and before he got the call from Jenny, before he got B's text too. ;)
*I own nothing. =)
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"Chuck," she stopped abruptly. He stopped too when he saw her. "I thought you would have left by now," she said, tucking a few brunette locks behind her ear. He smiled ever so slightly.
"I guess it took me a little longer to leave than I thought."
She looked down briefly, wondering if this would be qualified as an awkward conversation or a heartwarming one. She hadn't really thought when she'd gone to him earlier on and confronted him about Lily. It'd just seemed like instinct. The minute Nate told her the situation, Columbia no longer mattered, and yet somehow Chuck had even given her that.
"Thank-you," she said abruptly. He looked at her slightly confused. If she focused enough, she could see the remains of almost tears in his eyes from his confrontation with Lily. That thought warmed her stomach. That she was able to do that for him.
"…and me, being the woman that encouraged you to do it."
"For Columbia," she clarified. "One of the admissions staff on the board was there tonight, and he said I've been accepted." She smiled a little, wondering if it would be tossing away one of their memories after all his confidence-building for her at NYU had essentially been thrown to the wind.
He nodded, smiling a little in return. "It was the least I could do," he said simply. She nodded again. Stupidly, she thought.
"Well…I should go," she said, gesturing towards the long empty street. For a moment she contemplated telling him she didn't have a ride and suggesting that he take her home. The limo held too many memories for her though and she didn't know if she could stand being so close to him for so long, knowing what had taken place in that limo and how everything that was them had happened. She wouldn't analyze this night too much, but she knew the power of her love still loomed over their relationship. She wouldn't have gone to him if that hadn't been the case. And he wouldn't have come if he didn't care what he thought, and if he didn't believe she loved him.
"It was good to see you, Blair," he said. She halted in her step, barely two feet away and looked back at him. She saw the tears shining in his eyes again and knew every thought in his mind – you were right, I am terrified of losing her, you're welcome, I love you….and more, she knew, so many more. She didn't want to think of all the possible implications in that stare.
"Goodnight, Chuck," she said before she could get lost in him again. It was far too easy, even when she had set out to rid her mind of him or at least be at peace with herself. Even when he deserved to be forgotten.
"Blair," he called after her again when she was no more than two steps from where she'd been. She stopped for him again. She knew she'd always be stopping for him, even if she wouldn't let herself be with him. She'd be everything else. Because even if she moved on with someone else and fell out of love with Chuck, she'd always love him more than anyone else. She was in far too deep to break that bond. She'd always be drowning in him.
"I didn't want you to tell me what I needed to do or how I was feeling when you came to me earlier," he said, slowly walking towards her.
"Stop telling me how I feel."
She was still beneath his gaze, searching his face and somehow losing all train of thought.
"I know," she managed, still dazed by his words and his stare.
"I didn't want to know that you cared, because I know you won't someday and I didn't want to…" he sighed, trying to grasp the words to define what he was feeling so intensely, "feel that again, knowing that someday I won't ever feel it again."
Her lips parted. She swallowed hard, wondering if she should bestow onto him the knowledge that might make her struggle to be apart from him more difficult.
"You'll always feel it, Chuck," she said, resisting very hard against the need to touch him, reassure him by holding his hands tightly and falling against his chest. "I'll never stop caring about you," she said. She was a breath away from cupping his face in her hand. It felt dangerous to be so close to him. Her resistance was faltering. She had to get away.
Chuck nodded, but she saw the doubt within him. He was convinced that when she finally moved on, she'd block him out of her life completely. Or maybe he'd block himself out simply because he couldn't bear to see her so in love with someone that wasn't him. She couldn't picture it herself, and what was worse was that she couldn't picture him in love with someone else. The idea itself though, burned her to think about.
She still loved him so very much.
"I won't," she said very softly. He looked at her and smiled a little.
"I know," he said, repeating her response from earlier, but not nearly in the same state of mind as she had been. She couldn't soothe or reassure him like she'd been able to do before. Sex or just kissing was obviously out of the question, but even holding him in her arms threatened her resistance. It threatened them being broken up entirely.
At least while it was so soon over the break-up. Too much physical contact would cause their resistance's to break and they'd fall into each other, even if it was only for a night, simply because they were both so sorry and still so very in love with each other.
She kept her distance. "Goodnight, Chuck," she said again.
He smiled lightly once more. "Goodnight, Blair."
The two disappeared into the night and soon enough the incident seemed entirely like a dream. Except for the fact that they'd never touched. Blair knew for sure that in the safety of her dreams, she would have touched him endlessly and forced him to see her constant love for him, even if she still kept hidden how hard it was for her to resist him.
When Chuck returned to The Empire, he realized he'd gotten a text sometime throughout the evening that he'd somehow been unaware of. He guessed it was during the conversation he'd had with Blair. The world could have stopped spinning during that short period of time, and he wouldn't have known.
Thank-you
-B
The butterflies' fluttering in his stomach immediately increased. It never stopped. And he knew it never would.
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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. =) Please review.