Hee, for once I'm using dub names!

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Restraining Orders
"I don't believe I'm being told to do this. I'm being ordered about by a god damn-"

"Just do it, no arguments or anything. Nobody else should get hurt."

"But-"

"Please. Just do it."

***

That's how it all started, I guess. Maybe before that, but that's what stays in my mind strongest. The reason why I'm drifting off half-hanging in Tai's arms. Despite what everyone says about his sleeping habits he's exceptionally quiet. He mutters in his dreams, trying to hold me between his legs. A little over two weeks and it's like everything we've been through in the last four years is like a pin-drop.

***

The Digimon Emporer cracked his whip against the skull helmet of the Megadramon. "Forward, WereGarurumon!" The Spiral-controlled Digimon moved forward like a gigantic chess piece, one slow and angry step at a time, snarling furiously, red eyes blazing with pain and confusion. "Run, Matt!" Tai yelled above the rumble of thunder and the crash of dust clouds hitting the ground. The blonde stared up in disbelief at the anthro-wolf. Tai ran over to his best friend and pulled his arm by the sleeve of his ivy green blazer as hard as he could but still he would not move. "You hypocrite, get a move on!" His glazed-over blue eyes glanced at the chestnut haired boy. "He'll recognise me, he has to," he said greyly, tears forming in his eyes. "What did you tell me to do, hm? What did you tell me?" Tai cried, pulling his friend round to face him, perfect blonde hair not moving out of place in the slightest. "Well?" he barked, the blonde refusing to reply. He spun back round and looked up at WereGarurumon. "I don't know what you think you're playing at Ken, he ain't gonna follow your orders!" Matt shouted up at the younger teenager in the air, in a state of delusion and pure fear. "He's my best friend, he won't listen to y-" Another crack of the whip and Matt was sent flying, a solid kick from the anthro-wolf digimon caught him right into the stomach. "Matt!" Tai screamed. "AGUMON!" Suddenly, there was a bright light from behind, and the youngest Digidestined shot out of a Digital Port accompanied by Digmon, Halsemon, Nefertimon, Pegasusmon and Raidramon. "Tai, what's going on?" Davis asked loudly as his Digimon bolted off with a Blue Thunder attack. "Look... just... take care of things here. Do what you did with MetalGreymon. I have to find him. I'll be back later, don't wait up for us." Before Davis could have time to argue, Tai grabbed TK's arm and ran off up the hillside in the direction Matt had been thrown. "Tai, what's up? Where are we going?" Tai stopped for a moment. "Matt didn't move when WereGarurumon attacked him and I couldn't get him to move." TK's pale tan went to ill white within seconds. "This is going to sound really cruel, but you're going to have to find Matt by yourself. We're already one down, we can't afford to lose someone else." Tai nodded gravely and carried on up the hillside. The sky cracked with lightning and a heavy torrent of thunder and rain followed it, making the trip up the hill harder than before. Tai found it extremely difficult to keep his grip but he kept going nontheless until eventually he reached the top. "Matt, where are you?" he cried, fear and sadness and chaos creating turmoil in his head. The hellish rain beat down on his mess of brown hair but failed to flatten it. Suddenly, from behind, there was a loud thud and a splash as a tree branch cracked and fell to the ground after being hit by a thin bolt of lightning. "Matt!" The blonde was soaked through, his clothes plastered in mud, dark red stains seeping through his shirt which now clung tightly to his weak frame. "Guess this... is... payback..." he whispered chokily, barely able to find the energy to breathe. Tai's heart fell with the memory of four years ago when he was the one lying in a heap from defeat. With a cut-short sigh, Matt tried to speak again but his efforts were faltered by pure pain and confusion. Something in his mind cried, 'don't give in, not now, not yet!', but something else, something stronger, just wanted rid of the pain and forced him to faint. "Matt, I'm so sorry, I couldn't control-" the husky voice of the blonde's Digimon friend blurted through the downpour. Gabumon skidded over to the two teenagers. Agumon was not too far behind, TK and Kari on his tail - the others longed to come but Gatomon and Patamon, who were keeping guard, refused to let them go. "Matt, no!" the rookie Digimon howled, clinging to Matt's free arm, sniffing and sobbing. "It's alright, he's still alive. Just really, really hurt. We need to get him back." TK lurched forward to see his older brother properly, Kari trying to hold him back. "Let go, I wanna see my big brother!" he scowled, tearing his arm from Kari's grip. "TK, go with Kari and tell the others that Matt and I have gone back. Don't worry, TK, I'll take him to the hospital. I won't let him get into any more trouble." The dark haired boy picked up his best friend, whose still-perfect blonde hair nuzzled into Tai's chest.

***

I don't remember most of what happened but I just know that when I fell out of the tree the first face I saw was Tai's. When I woke up out of my coma I was the only one awake. It was roughly about half past three in the morning and I was exhausted. Turned out I'd bruised half a dozen ribs and fractured my left hand. Not too much then. I was so upset... not about hurting myself but I had this terrible feeling of betrayal. I'd thought that WereGarurumon would listen to me. I know it wasn't his fault but I thought... I don't know what I thought. I'd told Tai that we had to fight our own Digimon if we had to, but I totally ignored what I said. I could have killed myself and Tai. Speaking of who, he was fast asleep at my side, his hair tousled into the folds of the thin hospital sheets. He still looked racked with guilt and insomnia. Never a moment of peace for him, poor soul.

***

"He'll hate me, he'll hate me forever!" the rookie bawled, sobbing into one of the blonde's many black t-shirts. Gatomon and Agumon tried to approach him without startling him. "Ga-Gabumon?" The rookie turned to face his friends and sniffed deeply. "He'll never trust me again!" he wailed, clinging to the sodden t-shirt. "Matt won't hate you - he isn't capable of hating anyone he's spent so many amazing times with. You've been together through everything, he loves you like a brother!"

***

"I tried to clean up a bit, but I didn't know where much of your stuff went... and your dad's been really busy lately, so I don't know... well, he came to visit you loads when you were out cold, so don't be mad at him or anything-" Tai mumbled, shutting the front door of the Ishida apartment behind him. "No need to make excuses for my old man, I know he's done his best," he replied casually, smiling. "Did you go into my bedr-"

"I didn't go in there." Matt raised an eyebrow. "Well, be prepared to enter my inner sanctum. I don't know if you can see the floor any more but if all fails just crash on the bed. I gotta go the toilet, I'll be in in a minute. Make yourself at home."

***

I invited him into my bedroom. Tai knows that it's something special - he hasn't been in there for a very long time and I'm surprised he didn't sneak a look when he came over while I was in hospital. I haven't seen Gabumon yet, I really need to talk to him.

***

Matt wandered in to find Tai sitting small and formally on the edge of his bed. "I think you misheard me, I said you could be a human being in here," Matt said in a fake scowl, and despite the pain he knew it would cause him, he flomped onto the duvet, his legs missing Tai's head by an inch. He showed no sign of pain but Tai knew that it hurt him. Tai turned to the blonde, sprawling slightly, which made Matt smile. "How much does it hurt still?" he asked in a whisper. Matt closed his eyes and lifted his t-shirt. Tai winced when he saw the dark band of skin over the middle of his ribcage. "I didn't think that it'd show up on the outside," Matt growled, staring down disappointedly. "What are you so angry about?" Tai took hold of Matt's wrists, the left one much more delicately than the right and pulled them away from him so they were at his sides. "I hate being so weak. And what's worse is I'm weak and a hypocrite. I totally failed everyone." Tai shifted again so he was almost leaning right over the blonde. "You're not, don't you ever say that again. You did what you thought was right, against the odds, and okay, so you got a bit hurt but you put your friendship to the limit- and Gabumon is so upset, he thinks you hate him because he hurt you!" His eyes were burning, and locked with Matt's. "You are the strongest, most amazing, honest, loyal person I have ever met."

"Tai..." The blonde sat up a little more and put his hands on Tai's shoulders. "No, Matt, I'm not going to let you disagree with me this time." Matt shut his mouth and closed his eyes. "See, sometimes you should listen to me. I know that I don't generally have the best of ideas..." he trailed off when he realised how close he was. "Oh, God, I-" He sat back and turned away to hide the fact he blushing badly. "I should go," he muttered, and then left the blonde dazed in his bedroom.

***

That was a weird day for both of us. I know we'd come to laugh at it one day but at the time it was just plain strange. It didn't affect our relationship too badly, thank God, because wahat would happen next was the ultimate turning point.

***

Going back into the Digital World was strange and turbulent for the blonde and his Digimon, both scared and dubious. "Gabumon, we're going to be okay. I'd rather die than have you caught up in one of those Spiral things again." The rookie looked up in admiration and grinned, showing off his sharp fangs. "You're right. And I'd rather die than hurt you." All seemed quiet, but things are rarely quiet for long with the reign of the Digimon Emperor. There was a rumble of a dust cloud, yet this time no rain. "Aha! Let's see you defeat this Digimon, you impertinent imbeciles! Meet BlackRaidramon!" Out of what appeared to be nowhere, a shadowlike figure, twice the size of the original Raidramon appeared. "With his Black Thunder and Roaring Darkness attacks, he's super-powerful!" Davis looked a little stumped for a second. "Okay... full scale attack?"

"Sounds like a good plan to me." Davis shrugged. "FULL SCALE ATTACK!" Five Champions to one, sounds easy enough, Davis thought as his own friend Raidramon attacked with a Blue Thunder which was balanced out by BlackRaidramon's Black Thunder attack. "Hm, I might as well capture that damn Gabumon while I'm here, therte's no point in trying to capture that Agumon any more, they appear more relucant to hurt the evil WereGarurumon," Ken muttered to himself. Wormmon looked up pleadingly. "Oh, please Master, don't-" he was silenced with a single crack of the teenager's whip. The Digimon Emperor laughed and threw down a Black Spiral at the teenagers again. "GABUMON!" Matt screamed, and dived at his Digimon friend, pushing him out of way, whilst getting the Black Spiral caught tight around his right lower arm. "What the-" Tai walked over to the blonde and looked over his shoulder. "Matt?" The Digimon Emporer looked a little stunned. "That's strange, I never would have thought it would have adopted a human... that is very interesting. I could have some fun with this." He cracked his whip and Matt felt a blinding pain overtake his entire body. As he fell to the ground he snatched Tai and pulled him down on top of me. "Matt?!" The look in the blonde's eyes was enough to instruct Tai. "But I don't want to hurt you..." The Digimon Emperor laughed hysterically. "This is why you don't want friends, Digidestined. Because without you knowing it, they could turn their backs on you at any point and you'd have to hurt them in return." Tai was close to tears as he held down his best friend, who was considerably weaker than himself. "I don't believe I'm being told to do this. I'm being ordered about by a god damn-"

"Just do it, no arguments or anything. Nobody else should get hurt."

"But-"

"Please. Just do it." Ken cracked the whip once more and Matt roared in pain as his very soul battled against the Black Spiral's negative energy. He couldn't take it any longer and he let out a long, loud scream, and a bright blue light shot out of his chest near to where his crest would have once lay. The light was even too bright for Tai to look out, and he had to shield his eyes with an arm. Everyone stopped, even the Digimon Emporer was stunned. "What? What's going on?" he scowled, standing on the head of his Megadramon. The Black Spiral shattered into a million pieces, dissolved in the blue light. The light eventually faded, and Matt's short, sharp breathing was all that could be heard for the next few seconds. "BlackRaidramon!" He went to rampage, but Pegasusmon and Nefertimon used their Golden Noose attack to hold BlackRaidramon in place whilst Digmon attacked from underground, Halsemon attacked from the air and Raidramon launched a full on tackle complete with Roaring Blaster. "Damnit!" the Emperor hissed, and the figure on the flying Dramon disappeared. "Matt, are you alright, what happened?" Tai fell off his friend and as Matt sat up, pulling his legs in, Tai held him as tight as he could, almost as if he were trying to shelter him from any other attack that might be waiting for them. "I'm... okay, just a bit tired. I don't know what that was, one minute I've got this mad pain in my head... and there was a voice, something else, and then all the blue light... Tai, what d'you think it was?" The blonde nestled his head into Tai's chest and stared out into nothingness, still dazed by the experience.

***

I never worked out what happened that day, but I recognised the voice not long after, it was almost like hearing a sound clip of a movie scene. It was when Kari saw the Digital Spirits and they asked what each Digidestined's crest of virtue was, and the voice I heard was Joe's, when he said, 'and what's yours again? Friendship, isn't it?'. I had this realisation that I'd felt and overcome the darkness before and I would never let it happen again. So maybe that was it. Then again, maybe it was just because I didn't want Tai to have to hurt me.

***

"I figured you might be a bit shaky after what happened in here last time but if you don't want to talk in here just tell me and we can go out onto the sofa," Matt explained as he led Tai into his room. He was just about to go to bed when Tai turned up on the doorstep, so he was only wearing his boxer shorts when he opened the door. He was still only wearing his boxer shorts; he had made no effort to get dressed. Now that the painful bruises from WereGarurumon's attack was gone he was all too happy to strut around the house almost nude. That was Matt for you. "What did you want to talk about?" Tai turned to face the blonde, who was playing with his feet. "I know it's kind of late and I should've waited until tomorrow but I won't be able to sleep until I know the answer." Matt raised an eyebrow, but shrugged as a gesture for Tai to continue. "What..." he continued, a little quieter, "what, I mean... last time we were together in here... what were you thinking before I... honestly-" The blonde covered the chestnut haired boy's mouth with his left hand and smiled casually. "Are you sure you want me to be a hundred percent honest? You won't go mad or run away and commit suicide if I tell you? And you promise to keep it a secret?" Tai nodded, though starting to wonder if he should have agreed. "Well... the truth is... please don't hurt me or anything, but... I kind of... liked it. I mean..." Before he could finish his sentence, Tai was on top of him, knees either side of Matt's legs, his hands just behind Matt, at his sides. "I just want you to be happy. I hate seeing you upset." The blonde smiled again, bare inches away from Tai's face. "I'm always happy when I'm with you. I can't be not happy and be with you." Tai took a deep breath and advanced in the slightest bit. The light in the bedroom was extremely dim and Tai was God thankful for it. "No... wait, Tai, I don't think-"

"Oh God, I knew I shouldn't have-"

"Shh, hold that for a second, I know what you're thinking, and... look, Tai, I know that I love you and you love me, but the fact is, no matter how hard you're trying you just can't make it fit. We're not 'in' love. I don't..." Matt couldn't find the words to finish the sentence, but it had saved them both a lot of embarrassment, he'd worked that out long before he'd finished. The dark haired boy closed his eyes and sighed, the sigh caught somewhere between failure and relief. "Shouldn't change anything between us. Don't let it. Like I said - I love you, I'm just not 'in' love with you." Matt felt this sudden pang of guilt and regret as the words fell from his mouth. "No, no, I need to shut up, I need to shut up right now," he squeaked, trying to think of some way he could lighten the situation. "Don't stress out, Matt. I made a really big, stupid mistake."

"What?"

"I thought that I could... well, I dunno what I thought." He had a casual sly smile forming as he spoke. "I guess I must've thought I could tame you or something." Matt glared at Tai through the darkness. He switched off the lamp, it wasn't much use anyway. "Tame me? What'cha mean?" He lay back, arms bent slightly behind him. Tai shifted back a little more, but rested his head on the blonde's chest. He was surprised that Matt was hot to the touch, Tai supposed he had a naturally high skin temperature. "Exactly what I say. You're a wild, passionate free spirit. I don't know what gave me the idea that I could tame you." The blonde played with a few stray ends of hair near the back of Tai's neck lazily. "I wouldn't think so, I always thought I was kinda... well, not as wild as you think I am."

"Well, I guess you're never around a mirror when you get angry or anything, you can get pretty scary if people push you around too much. I could see it when Ken took Gabumon. There was something in your eyes that made you look like a caged animal. But... it's not just when you're angry. When you're really happy, your eyes sparkle more than usual. It's a decent explanation to why every girl would drop at your feet." Matt laughed softly, his hand working its way through Tai's hair slowly. Everything seemed so much easier when you couldn't really see. "Tai, be honest with me here. What do you want? You looked really upset when I said... what I said before. I know this sounds really bad so don't take it the wrong way, but what do you want from me?" The chestnut haired boy lifted his head and stared Matt right in the eyes. "If I could really tell what I wanted? I don't know, I'm still working out whether I want to kick your arse at sports like I always do, or hold you down and kiss you into oblivion. But... I can't say for sure." Matt scowled in anticipation. "Look, d'you wanna kiss me now and try and kill some of those weird hormonal urges or are you just going to sit there staring at me?" he hissed. Tai didn't need any more prompt, he leaned forward and kissed the blonde, holding him down by sliding his fingers into Matt's hands, which were now somewhere above their heads. A few moments later they stopped, both catching their breath, adrenalin surging. "Did that make it fit?" Tai asked in a whisper.

***

Okay, so you're not meant to mix love and friendship or whatever, but how could I resist it? He was totally in love with me. At first I was more or less impartial, and let him have his way simply becuase I didn't want him to get hurt, but as time went on I found it harder and harder to convince myself I was only doing this as a kind of favour. So I guess he did make it fit.

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Okies, so it's a bit of a weird one but I think it's kinda cute, and my head is buzzing from the amount of lactose and sugar in my bloodstream so I'ma go sleep - hope you liked the fic!

Ikobe