He Has A Video Blog?
Disclaimer: I do not own Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. I am, however, very excited for the sequel.
The head of the LAP sat in his office, trying to figure out what had happened to the Wonderflonium that had been stolen a few days ago. It was very dangerous and very valuable. It probably should have had a stronger guard, but its rarity meant there were few who would have a use for it.
"Captain Hammer said that the culprit was a 'Doctor Horrible,'" he announced. "I'm willing to bet that's not his real name, though. Do we have anything on him or is he an amateur?"
His deputy did a quick search. "No, it says that a few weeks ago the deputy mayor issued him a letter of condemnation."
"For what?" the chief inquired. If it were big enough for that, why hadn't they heard of it?
"Vandalism, sir," the deputy replied. "And disturbing the peace."
"I see," the chief said neutrally. That wasn't much to go on.
"Oh, look at this!" the deputy exclaimed.
"What is it?" the chief asked.
"It would appear that our 'Dr. Horrible' has a video blog," the deputy announced.
The chief stared at him. "…You're joking."
"See for yourself," the deputy invited, turning the monitor so the chief could see.
"Well, what do you know…" the Chief murmured. "Let's check out the most recent entry."
"Do you really think he'll put anything in there about his criminal activities?" the deputy asked dubiously.
"Unlikely," the chief admitted. "But we could gain valuable insight into his character nonetheless."
The deputy pressed the 'play' button and Dr. Horrible's image appeared on the screen. "Wow. He looks like one of those geeks you'd find at a comic book convention," he noted.
"That may be so," the Chief agreed, "but he's supposed to be very dangerous. He IS Captain Hammer's nemesis after all and I heard Johnny Snow has run-ins with him as well."
"Alright, the wait is over!" Dr. Horrible announced dramatically.
"What were we waiting for?" the Deputy asked.
"I'm sure he'll tell us," the Chief guessed.
"This my friends, is my Freeze-Ray which, with the addition of the Wonderflonium I obtained at my famously successful heist last week," Dr. Horrible cut himself off.
"I suppose this shows he's the right guy," the deputy said.
"That or he's an idiot," the chief agreed. "Could be an idiot anyway if the signal's traceable."
"I'll get right on that when this is done," the deputy promised.
"I say successful in that I achieved my objective," Dr. Horrible clarified.
"What else could he possibly mean by successful?" the deputy wondered.
The chief shrugged. "Who knows? Maybe he's just really anal about semantics."
"Still, 'successful' seems like a pretty straightforward word," the deputy pointed out.
Then Dr. Horrible cleared up their confusion, sounding almost adorably nerdy. "It was less successful in that I inadvertently introduced my arch-nemesis to the girl of my dreams, and now he's taking her out on dates, and they're probably going to French kiss or something."
The deputy started snickering. "Or something alright. God, he sounds like a virgin…"
"We don't need your personal opinion, deputy," the chief said tiredly, although he kind of agreed. Who worried that a date would progress to 'French kissing' status? Hell, who out of high school even used the term 'French kissing'?
"Sorry," the deputy made a valiant effort to stop laughing. "Ahem. Well, his two nemesis' are Captain Hammer and Johnny Snow and since Captain Hammer is the one who was at the heist, we should be able to find this girl easily enough and hopefully from there we'll be able to find Doctor Horrible."
"I'm not sure how well that will work," the chief replied. "Captain Hammer is has some philandering tendencies, I've heard."
"Still, if he's going out with this girl often enough to upset Doctor Horrible that badly, he should be able to remember her. And even if he is going out with several girls at once, the fact the dates have been multiple means that even if he doesn't know who the Doctor Horrible's talking about, he'll have a way to reach her and we can investigate the various girls, show them a picture of Horrible, and see if any of them recognize him," the deputy decided.
"He might not help, though," the chief mused. "After all, if we find out Doctor Horrible's secret identity because of Captain Hammer, then he might feel obligated to reveal Captain Hammer's secret identity and the heroes and villains are said to be very protective of those."
"Who said that Doctor Horrible even knows who Captain Hammer really is?" the deputy asked.
"Trust me on this one," the chief said firmly. "Archnemesises ALWAYS know."
"She called him sweet," Doctor Horrible confided, looking lost. "How is he sweet?"
The deputy started laughing again. "Sorry, just…I can't believe he introduced them! That is just so…I wonder if he'll get an invitation to the wedding."
"Captain Hammer would probably throw the organ at him if he attended," the chief said dryly. "I heard he's rather fond of physically besting his various nemesises."
"This guy, though?" the deputy raised an eyebrow. "He looks kind of like a lightweight."
"Most evil geniuses are," the chief remarked.
"He sounds more like a love-struck teen than an evil mastermind," the deputy noted.
"For all we know, all villains are like that," the chief pointed out. "They're certainly all melodramatic enough. They just don't have video blogs."
Doctor Horrible looked off into the distance melodramatically and caught sight of what the blog was supposed to be about. "RIGHT. Freeze-Ray. SO as of tonight I am in the Evil League of Evil if all goes according to plan; which it WILL because I hold a P.H.D in Horribleness. See you at the aftermath. PEACE!" He paused, thinking about that for a second. "But not literally..."
"A P.H.D. in Horribleness?" the deputy repeated. "What the hell kind of university did he attend?"
"There are some things we are better off not knowing," the chief replied. "We really are. It appears he's an applicant for the Evil League of Evil, which is serious news. From what I understand, Bad Horse hasn't let anyone in yet who hasn't committed a murder, so tonight we'll have to be on our guard lest we lose someone."
"But what's he planning? He didn't say what he was going to do, just that it was going to take place tonight," pointed out the deputy.
"The Mayor's dedication of the Superhero Memorial Bridge is tonight," the chief responded. "That will probably be his target as that's the biggest event going on and the League is nothing if not ostentatious."
"And evil," the deputy added solemnly. "So very evil."
The chief nodded his agreement. "Well, nothing for it then. Let's contact Captain Hammer and beef up security at the event."
"Right away, sir," the deputy agreed, standing up. "It really was thoughtful of Doctor Horrible to warn us in his blog. Otherwise he might have gotten away with it…"
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