This is normal OC, not SIOC/reincarnation.

I know I should be working on Abyss... but I had this idea for so long (certainly longer than Abyss) and it continued to eat me that I still didn't write it up... so here it is.

I know where I want to go from there, but it will be side project (probably) thus don't expect regular updates (ha! regular... funny... what is that ). Though I guess it's up to how much this work will be popular/unpopular.

I am horrible in descriptions, so just imagine that Kiaria (OC) looks like the image of this fanfiction.

Warning for the whole FF: fuu there will not be a lot of swear words (at least not from OC), but this one will be a lot more bloody then Abyss ever will be...additional warning will be in future chapters

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the anime/manga One piece. I only own my OC. The image of this fiction is also not mine, blame google darlings.

I was looking down, down, down at the blue sea with pale face. Did I mention that I absolutely hate heights? No? Well, I am mentioning it now.

Sure, I've become better after all those sessions that were supposed to get rid of my phobia, but honestly? There was still little fear lingering that surfaced when I was alone - for example when I was on a look-out position

Like right now. This sucked.

I seriously didn't know who had the bright idea to stick a person who was suffering from lingering Acrophobia into Crow's nest. Like really, really high into the air.

Well I guess I could see the point as I was practically useless in fights (what with my aversion to blood and wounds in general), didn't have any talent in managing the ship, didn't knew shit about repairing ships and outside of knowing herbs and other flowers that could help health, my standard treating techniques had a lot to desire. The only thing that I had going for me and that caused me to move in ranks was my natural use of Kenbunshoku Haki - so 'naturally' I had to be put into this position. Right. Didn't mean I have to like it though.

In the first place I was satisfied with being low ranking officer who cleaned headquarters (and docked ships) all day long and whose only difficulty of the day was deciding which cleaning product to use on what. There was the advantage of spending time in the headquarters' gardens too - I was assigned as a main worker there after it was found out that I was doing a good job in taking care of them. And I enjoyed it, so nobody had to be nearby to stop me from slacking off - as was the usual for other chore boys/girls who were assigned there.

I didn't have any aspiration to rise in ranks from the start. I didn't even want to be a marine for potato's sake - but if I wanted to continue to live in Marineford, along with my grandma, I just had to.

Then everything changed when it was discovered that I actually had some use - outside of my gardener skills that is. Our relatives from my father's side were pretty thrilled. They immediately sent my father's older brother to cultivate my talent and arranged for me to have a one year long vacation too - it was scary how much influence those with money had.

I was trained by uncle in Haki - he tried to teach me Busoshoku Haki as well, but unfortunately (for me fortunately though) I was total failure in that. When he didn't have time to teach me (he was pretty high in the ranks afterall - no matter how he may look), my grandma continued her hellish training that I had to endure from the moment it was decided that I will be marine. Though throughout that year her training was very different and harder from what l was used to. Her reasoning was that there will be high possibility of me encountering enemy once I leave the safety of the Marineford. She gave me her old gun, too, saying that she would hardly ever used it again.

All those training came in handy once I experienced my first fight (and simultaneously my last). I was holding my ground until… well until blood landed on me. I don't remember clearly whose blood it was I think I didn't even register the source as all I did was look at the red liquid with growing trepidation. It felt so nauseating and I couldn't think clearly anymore. I probably should be glad that nobody killed me in my frozen state.

Of course I had become laughing stock after that - marine that is afraid (I wasn't afraid… I was just disgusted by the crimson body fluid and what it meant when there was some of it on you, especially if it wasn't your blood) of a little blood? What a joke! They tried to get rid of it as they did with my fear of heights… but as it wasn't phobia per se, normal methods weren't working. I knew that spilling blood was considered normal by most, however I just… couldn't see the point of it. Was it really necessary? I know that it was just wishful thinking of a naïve girl but after seeing children twice younger than me actually look forward to executions that sometimes were organized at Marineford (and there was so, so much blood - why did they choose such bloody way of executing?!) I couldn't bring myself to let go of thinking that.

Well… from that day onward I became lookout. I was either up the mast or down under the deck- sleeping or preparing psychically for the next shift. At least the other lookout was good guy- a little on a morose side, but I can't really fault him as I was sour most of time as well.

I wasn't allowed to participate in fights after that first failure (so that I didn't burden others with my presence), instead I was ordered to stay under the deck and after crew returned I dully counted how many didn't come back. It wasn't like I hated to stay out of harm's way, rather opposite if I was being honest, but it just made me feel so… useless. Well no use in crying over the spilled milk, was it?

Without me looking, days merged with months and next thing I realized, it was already two years I spent on the same ship, in the same nest. It was already two years and strangely enough I still couldn't place names to faces and the only ones I talked with were my superiors when I was informing them about what happened on my shift and my colleague - his name was Dopup (and of course my grandma - through letters or when we stopped to resupply in the headquarters).

I sighed and closed my beaver colored eyes, my hands going up to readjust rubber band in my long hair that came lose because of the wind. Then I opened my eyes to observe in boredom the icebergs we were sailing through, my senses stretched past the iced-over sea to look for the potential enemies.

Enough thinking about the past, I had job to do after all.

We were on our way to aid captain Hina in capturing some rookie pirate crew as she had to send half of her fleet with the traitorous Shichibukai (he was being transported to Impel Down).

I scoffed at the thought of that disgusting pirate. I did dislike pirates in general - the only thing they did was causing chaos and bloodsheds. However what brought the revulsion in me the most were backstabbers. Afterall my relatives abandoned us without backward glance and came back once I proved to have a use; they were traitors of a worst caliber who only cared about money and fame.

I was bitter, no point in denying it, especially because it was their fault I was on this ship.

Said ship suddenly changed course nearly making me fall over the railings if it weren't for me swiftly grabbing a rope.

I fell to my knees and breathed deeply to calm my frantically beating heart. Sweet potatoes, I hated this work so much... At least the pay was good.

#####

Climate was starting to calm down, signifying that we were close to Alabasta and meaning that I could descend down from my personal hell.

Finally.

I was so happy to go down, you couldn't even imagine.

I carefully got over the wooden rail and was in the middle of letting go of it and instead gripping ladder when it happened.

The ship jerked.

I was not a clumsy person, I just had a problem with coordination if I was nervous or afraid and... in that moment I was both, thanks to my former phobia.

Thus... I fell.

Now I don't know what others would do in my situation maybe yell at the top of their lungs and wave around in a parody of a bird? Well, I certainly didn't do that. Instead I just... froze up? I wanted to yell, oh sweet carrot, I so wanted, however my mouth clamped up along with all of my muscles. I was falling like a sack of potatoes right into a sea... On the bright side I wasn't destined to splat against deck.

Instead I splashed into waves...

And it seriously hurt. Mother of all cucumbers, why did it hurt so much?!

Though the pain was good for something - it forced my frozen up limbs move again which saved me from drowning, so I was not about to complain. Much.

After I finally got my head above water I proceeded to do all the steps I knew to not let myself fall into the panic attack. The reason for panicking? The damn ship was already so far away!

Now I had two options: thrust all my strength into my limbs and try to catch up (and probably sooner exhaust myself than I actually reach the ship) or preserve my energy and hope that somebody will sail through here and notice me (again highly probable that I sooner drown).

Seeing as both of them had the same chance of survival I chose the one that would let me live a little longer. It was also partly because I just didn't have a willpower to chase after continuously receding ship.

I wonder how long it will take them to notice I wasn't on board? I wasn't social butterfly and usually stayed out of everyone's way until it was time for me to do something... So probably long.

Raising my head I looked detachedly at the blue sky. It was nice day. The shining sun's rays were warming up my damp face. The warm feeling was what broke the dam and I let the first tears fall. This was so unfair. I didn't want to be marine, but it was expected of me. I wanted to take care of colorful flowers at the headquarters' gardens but instead I was transferred to the dull ship. I hated it up in the crow's nest, but still I was forced to go up there.

Yes I was being melodramatic, but hell this was probably my last moments and if I wanted to be melodramatic, I sure as hell will be.

Gaaah, this only made me sad more.

I thought back on my life and funnily enough in this moment, where my mind was suffocated by desperation mixed with regret, all I was remembering were words from the book I read years ago... It was forbidden by the government to own it, but grandma was always a bit of a rebel, whatever she said to counter that.

Anyway, I found the book in the basement of our house and read it secretly after that (though I am sure grandma knew I found it... nothing escaped her notice, especially in her home).

I swiftly realized after only reading few pages why was the book forbidden. It had small undercurrents here and there where the book undermined and made fun of the government and the law power in the world.

And as I was easily influenced child at that time who was to that moment only taught that the word was white and black, with white being Word Government... it was entirely new experience for me. I devoured the book in one go. It was like eating a forbidden fruit, knowing I shouldn't but still doing it. It was fulfilling, entertaining, charming… I finally had something solid to build my beliefs on...this book was something of a holy grail to me after that. Of course I was mature enough to hide my new obsession fwith a book.

And funnily enough the content of a book wasn't something intricate and breaking. It was about a man who decided to find the wisest person in the world. Soon he became famous for his quest and people from every corner of the world started to visit him, thinking that they were the ones he was looking for. However nobody from them was proclaimed as such by him.

Until one day, the ruler of the world decided to visit him too... he was then insulted by the man's refusal of saying the emperor was the wisest and he ordered for a man to be executed.

Some tried to help him escape, but the man was already too disappointed by the world and people in general and decided to accept the death with open arms. But not before deciding that his quest was impossible from the start as wise people didn't flaunt their wisdom around instead they taught others silently and didn't look for acknowledgement.

So no, it wasn't about content so much as it was more about the style of writing. It was mixture of a dry humor, hidden scathing remarks and sober wording that touched my core. I had never read something like that before in the obligatory two years school.

Of course when I read other books in the basement they had better content, verbalization and even the language itself was easier to read, but they never made such an impact on me like that first book did. I wonder why?

No point thinking about that now, really. However my impeding death made me realize something... I always thought that everyone around me (except Grandma) were fools like in that book... looking back at it, I was the biggest fool of them all. My death will be stupid too... marine dying because she fell over the ship, when sea was relatively calm.

Gaah... My grandma will so kill me when she gets her hands on me in the afterlife.

I chuckled through the tears at the thought. She probably would be too impatient to wait and instead will revive me just to kill me again.

Well I could at least appreciate the fact that my dead wouldn't be a bloody one... though drowning was certainly an unpleasant and painful way to go too. I shuddered.

I didn't know how long I was floating in the water but probably for long as my hands were starting to cramp up and biting cold was cursing through my whole body.

"If you are somewhere out there, Prince in shining armor and on the white horse, now is the best time to appear," I whispered without any heat in it. I was too tired to fully articulate.

The panic was starting to crept onto me, even though I was attempting to suppress it.

I was taking short frantic breaths; tears were flowing tirelessly from my eyes as tremors shook my whole body.

I don't want to die. I don't want to die. I don't... want... to... die...please... please somebody... helphelphelphelp-

Suddenly on the edge of my shortened range of Haki (that I was taught to have activate even in my sleep) ship appeared. There wasn't a lot of people on it for it to be marine or even normal ship, but I didn't care. There was still hope for me. And I wanted to live even if I had to sell my soul to the devil.

I weakly waved to bring their attention to me, however I didn't know if I achieved that as in that moment my limbs failed on me. I renewed my efforts to stay upright, because hell no, I refused to die, when I was so close to being saved.

My struggle proved to be futile though as few seconds later I couldn't hold my head above the water anymore and I started to descend into the murky depths of the sea.

I stretched my hand towards steadily receding surface through which I saw baby blue sky that looked like it was mocking me with its pureness.

I was distantly aware that my lungs were starting to hurt. It would be so easy to breathe in the water now, however I stubbornly held onto the hope that the ship roused in me. Someone will come, someone will save me. I was sure of it.

However as seconds ticked away, the burning of my lungs increased and my conscience started to fade away, it was harder and harder to clutch onto that hope.

Just as I felt my body to give up, someone ruptured the stillness around me and started to quickly approach me. My sight was blurred, but I made out a black clothes that the person was wearing.

'Is that a Grim Reaper?' was my last thought as my consciousness completely slipped from my grasps.

Explanation of a title:

Ivory tower - A sheltered, overly-academic existence or perspective, implying a disconnection or lack of awareness of reality or practical considerations.

I choose this title because Kiaria-chan here is a little... naive as I implied in the chapter, she is aware that world is not black and white, but she still categories pirates as bad and marines as good, same with her dislike of blood and hurting in general, she will need to have a few wake up calls to be more... practical and let's say realistic.

And about her name, it's Japanese and it means "fortunate"... well let's see how lucky she will be onwards with me as writer.

Well then... I would like to know what you liked/disliked about the chapter, so if you have something to say review or PM me if you want.