Debated Affection

Chapter 1 Branson's POV

It was on days like this when I really wished my uniform wasn't so dam thick and heavy. It was the hottest day I could remember for a long time there were a few fluffy white clouds populating the summer sky, annoyingly none of them crossing the path of the sun to grant me a little shade. And here I was running across the Grantham estate, I could feel the sweat building on my forehead, but the news I had to deliver made him keep running.

Being a chauffer it was bizarre to be able to move this fast, feel the warm breeze on my face, without the addition of a steering wheel in my hands.

But it was a good feeling. I tried to recall the last time I had run like this, and immediately wished I hadn't, as the details of that day flooded back.

The cries of the protesters drowning out the announcer; the feeling of panic as I fought my way through the angry crowd to find her, protect her; the drunken gaze of the bald feller who smelt not so different to that of a whisky distillery; the force of his fist as it made contact with my stomach; the fast paced fight and the world grinding to a halt as I watched her fall; the sound of her head impacting on the wooden table; being surprised at her lightness as I carried her to safety; the dark stain on my right sleeve where her head had rested; the anxiety and pain of having to leave her in the Crawley house; the guilt of telling Lady Mary and having to look her in the eyes.

But the most define memory of all was of when I stood in the entrance hall of Downton, awaiting my fate, and hearing her threaten her father that she would run away if he fired me. The warm rush that spread throughout my entire body in that instant, as that was the moment I knew that I loved her.

The two cream tents had gotten closer then I thought in the time my mind had drifted back. I could make out Lady Mary and Mr Crawley apparently in deep discussion by the large oak tree, it didn't look like it was going well. I also spotted Thomas serving two elderly gentlemen, his back to me, holding a silver tray and standing upright and stiff. I couldn't help but chuckle as Thomas turned away from the gentlemen and one leaned closer to the other indicating to his eye and nodded towards the retreating servant, their brows creased in query or disapproval; I couldn't tell which. I had never been to fond of Thomas. I didn't hate him, as he had done nothing to offend me, but I couldn't help feeling a slight hostility towards the pale skinned Footman.

As I approached the mix of servants and nobility, I slowed to a brisk walk, jogging a little when I was sure no one was watching. I doubted that Lord Grantham would be pleased if his chauffer sprinted through his garden party and disturbed his guests.

My eyes flickered from face to face of servant and guest alike, lingering on some for a second. Others, who looked similar to the one I was searching for, a second longer. Unnecessary as I knew that when I saw her, I would know immediately.

Then, on the far side of the gathering, on the edge of the furthest cream tent, in the company of Lady Edith and two other ladies, was Lady Sybil. Conveniently placed in my line of vision. She had not seen me as she was in deep conversation with Lady Edith. I resisted the nearly overwhelming urge to run to her side, and instead, took the opportunity to watch her freely. As I watched, I noticed how she did little things that I had seen her do many times before. Such as, when she twisted the ribbon of her dress through her delicate fingers, to anybody else it would be just as they saw, but I knew that she did this when she was trying to suppress a otherwise unacceptable comment on women's rights. I also knew that if the talk continued she would reach across and play with the material on her right sleeve. Much to my amusement, moments later her left arm reached across her stomach and searched for a loose bit of thread on her sleeve. Chuckling to myself I began to make my way over to her, only to be stopped by a low voice full to the brim with authority.

"Do you find something about a chauffer, loitering around his Lordships garden party, when he is unneeded, amusing, Mr Branson?" the smile that had occupied my face moments before gave way to my serious professional expression, as I turned to face Mr Carson. He was stood a few feet away, his eyebrow raised in an accusing manner.

"Not at all Mr Carson. I was merely searching for Lady Sybil, but I can't seem to find her." I did feel rather bad about lying to Mr Carson, well I wasn't lying completely I convinced myself, so it is in a way acceptable. Mr Carson's eyebrow rose a little more.

"Are you hard of sight Mr Branson?"

"Not that I am aware of Mr Carson." I let my professional look broken by a slightly confused frown.

"Well, an able sighted person would be able to see that Lady Sybil is, quit clearly, over by that tent." he indicated in the direction I was facing previously. "I do hope you can see roads better than people. In any case why are you in need of Lady Sybil in the middle of a garden party?"

"A message came through on the telephone, and I thought it best to notify Lady Sybil." I answered confidently.

"Very well, but be quick about it"

"Yes, Mr Carson."

I began to walk briskly towards Lady Sybil, looking over my shoulder every so often, and when I was sure Carson was no longer watching, I broke into a run, eager to get to her side.

She was still talking to the Lady on her right and did not see me approaching. With each step I took closer to Lady Sybil, the smile on my face became harder to contain. As I approached her I slowed to a walk.

Before I knew it I was right behind her.

I tapped her on the arm, aware that one of her Lady friends seemed a little taken back by this informal interaction.

"I've got news Milady" I announced.

She turned to face me. It was unnecessary, and I knew it, but still I leaned forward. Close enough to feel the warmth emanating from her. Before whispering, "Gwen got the job Milady."

Her reaction was instant. She gasped with delight as she turned to face me, for an instant, before turning back to her sister and friends. In that instant our eyes had met, and I could see the joy swimming in them. A joy I had brought to her.

She composed herself and muttered her apologies to her company and turned again to face me, still for only an instant, before leaving at a respectable speed. I followed vaguely aware of the confused looks from Lady Edith as she watched the two of us scurry away.

It did not take us long to find Gwen. She was emerging from the main tent, holding a silver tray, and saw us approaching. Before we had come to a stop Lady Sybil burst out with the news.

"Mr Bromwich just rung. You've done it Gwen, you've got the job."

Gwen's reaction was just like Milady's, after many gasps she turned to a passing maid.

"Oh take it, take it." she managed to say before handing the tray to the bewildered looking girl.

Now tray-less, Gwen let out a small squeal of delight before launching into both mine and Lady Sybil's arms.

Next to Milady, Gwen was one of my favourite people at this place. I admired her ambition, courage and will power to push herself to greater things, with some encouragement. It was for this that I also envied her slightly.

Suddenly I realised that Lady Sybil's arm was overlapping my hand, I had a good mind to bring my own hand back slightly and place it on hers, but thought better of it. I was already pushing the social boundaries enough.

Our rejoicing was soon interrupted by a rather unhappy sounding Mrs Hughes.

"Something to celebrate?"

We broke out of hold quickly. I was still very aware of the distance between Lady Sybil and myself, the back of our hands were touching, which made my heart race.

I heard Gwen begin to tell Mrs Hughes the good news, before throwing caution to the wind and taking Lady Sybil's hand in mine, my fingers locking into place between hers. For a short time, although it felt like a decade, she did not respond. But before I had time to regret my decision I felt her gloved fingers curl around mine.

All that I wanted now was for her to look at me for more than a second, as she had not done so today.

"I'm very happy for you Gwen," the sound of Mrs Hughes voice brought my mind back to the conversation in front of me. "and we'll celebrate after we've finished today's work." she said sternly.

"Of course Mrs Hughes." murmured Gwen and she walked away. As she did I gazed down at Lady Sybil's hand enclosed in mine and I noticed that she did the same, a smile made it's way to the surface once again and I was struck with an idea.

"I don't suppose that-" I began.

"Lady Sybil-"

In a way I was glad that Mrs Hughes had chosen that moment to interrupt, as when I had started to talk, Lady Sybil had looked up from our entwined hands and directly into my eyes. In that moment I had forgotten what I was going to say, distracted by the fact that it was the first time she had looked at me properly all day.

I couldn't help but notice the disappointment in her eyes as she reluctantly turned away to look at Mrs Hughes when she addressed her.

"Her Ladyship was asking after you."

I felt annoyed at Mrs Hughes' small smile as she said this, and couldn't help but think that was she said wasn't true.

I glanced at Lady Sybil as she said nothing and turned away from her. My heart skipped a beat when she looked at me again as she left. The small smile she wore didn't hide the disappointment which still lingered in her eyes. I got the feeling that she also thought that this request was lacking in truth, but I gave a small grin in reply as she left my side.

Giving in to the urge, I looked over my shoulder to watch her walk away, before letting out a sigh, and starting off in the opposite direction.

"Be careful ma lad" Mrs Hughes said, before I had taken more then two steps away. "Or you'll end up with no job and a broken heart."

"What do you mean?" I replied with a put on grin.

I could see that she was trying to be kind through her strict tone, and the truth that she spoke. But I didn't want to think about it at the moment, let alone have someone explain what I already knew very well.

She opened her mouth to say something else, but apparently thought better of it. Instead she simply sighed and walked away, leaving me stood there.

I knew that it was impossible, I had always known. I'm a chauffer not a high standing Lord, as she is the daughter of Lord Grantham. We could never be.

I looked down at my hand. It was strange, but I could still feel her hand on mine, it was if it had never left.

"Mr Branson?"

I turned around to once again find Mr Carson standing behind me, this time he was holding a silver plate, with what looked like a telegram, on it.

"I trust you have delivered your message to Lady Sybil?"

"Yes Mr Carson, I was just on my way back to the house in fact."

Carson gave me an approving nod and went on with his work. I began to walk back to the house.

I had made it half way back when a call from the party caught my attention.

"Please would you stop, please."

It was the voice of his Lordship, I stopped in mid stride. I could easily pick him out as he had run out of the tent and started to wave his hat around. Something didn't seem right.

"My Lords, Ladies and Gentlemen, can I ask for silence." he called.

I noticed that he had a piece of paper in his hand. A telegram?

"Because I very much regret to announce," he continued, everyone had now given him there undivided attention. "That we are at war with Germany."

A rustle of murmurs swept across the crowd. I could feel my throat tighten. We had all known that war was coming at some point, but even so it was still a shock to hear those words be announced on what was a very nice summers afternoon.

I remained still watching the reactions of the crowd. Daisy had gone over to William and grabbed his arm, like she was worried that he would be dragged away to war there and then. Thomas hurried over to Doctor Clarkson, probably to confirm his place in the medical corps. Her Ladyship had gotten out of her chair for the first time that day and made her way over to his Lordship, who place his arm around her and gently kissed the top of her head.

But there was one person I searched for the most.

Lady Sybil was standing next to Lady Mary, her eyes wide. Lady Mary had, like her Father had to her Mother, placed and arm around her youngest sister. I dearly wished that it could have been my arm wrapped around her. I noticed that her sisters hold didn't prevent Lady Sybil from looking frantically around the crowd, her head twisting around to get a better look behind her.

I wanted to go back and be by her side again. But if Carson saw me there again I doubt he would be best pleased with me, and I was on dangerous ground as it was already thanks to the Rippon incident.

I made to continue back to the house, when just as I turned I felt someone watching me. Looking back at the crowd the only face I saw looking this way was the only one I wanted to see.

Lady Sybil's concerned expression was the clearest out of the whole lot. Her gaze shot through me making me want to go down there even more then earlier.

I took one step back down. But then her face was gone. His Lordship had taken each on of his daughters under an arm and was steering them into the tent, closely followed by her Ladyship and Lady Edith.

I sighed and turned back towards the house.

This is what would always happen. His Lordship will direct his daughters lives to give them the best ones possible. Unfortunately this meant marring them into high class families, families with the most financial and social security.

He would not let one marry a penniless chauffer with no social standing or influence.

No matter how much that particular chauffer loved Sybil Crawley.

~oOo~

Okay, first Downton fic, I just love these two. Easily my favourite couple on this fab show. So ye, I would love it if you could tell me what you think and also point out if I have made any stupid mistakes.

Thank you

xX Big HugsXx