Zexion never believed in all those lies about joy, happiness and serenity.
Not even when he was Ienzo.
He was sure that when he'll have his heart back, the only kind of joy he would feel, will be the reading, nothing more, nothing less.
Still he was envious. Envious of those like Axel and Xigbar that, even if they had far less brilliant minds than his, felt positive emotions.
One day he had asked them where they took those from, seeing that he couldn't even remember those sensations. Xigbar answered that it was in his nature, he was happy and couldn't do nothing about it: not even as a Nobody his vitality wore out. Axel said that he had found his happiness in his love (Not really requited) for Roxas: his world goes pink when he sees the blond boy.
Number 6 was incredulous. Was it possible that they could feel such good things… And he couldn't?
Doubt stroke him. What if the others…?
He has never been the kind of person that goes around making questions, but curiousity (Or fear?) was assaulting him.
He asked to whoever he met if they knew what happiness was.
Everyone gave different answers: Xemnas said that it was strictly connected to the ones that live around us, it is influenced by them and so it changes; Xaldin said that he felt a similar sensation when he realized his plans, when he saw his struggles giving something back; Vexen stated that he felt realized qhen a research gave the hoped results; Lexaeus said that for him the joy was feeling in peace with the world; Saix affirmed that true happiness could be felt only when we are with our dear ones; Demyx was sure that joy meant enjoying every second of the life, following your heart (The Nobody was sure he had one), like in a muaic paper; Luxord thought that we could feel it only when we were sure of what we wanted; Marluxia said that joy was a far off memory for him, but he knew that it was the proof that our heart had found its missing half, its serenity; Larxene didn't really give a straight answer, she only stated that happiness was different in every person.
Zexion was confused; then he was the only condemned one that couldn't remember it? That couldn't feel the ghost of his heart beating again for happiness?
While his mind was crode with not so joyful thoughts, he felt a hand plein placed on his shoulder, making him turn around, ending up facing Demyx.
"Number IX…What do you want…?", the Cloaked Schemer's voice was toneless and emotionless like always.
"Err…Well…" the Melodic Nocturn was….Stuttering…? "I was wondering if you wanted to spend some time with me…No, no, wait, I mean…If you wanted to…Hear me play… Maybe… It could help you with your… Quest to find happiness, I don't know…If you want…I think…"
Tu-tum. Tu-tum. Beat. Far off rumble. Tu-tum. Repetitive, speeding up. Tu-tum. Heart. Emotions. Anxiety. Fright. Hope. All this coul be read in the ghost of the mullet-haired boy's heart.
Zexion put a hand on the hole where his heart once was. He smiled for the first time in what seemed an eternity.
Maybe it wasn't too late to start believeing in happiness.
Tu-tum. Memories. Tu-tum. Hope. Tu-tum. Realization. Tu-tum. Love.