I don't own any of the Twilight characters playing with my characters; hopefully they'll all play nice.

Spelling and grammar mistakes are all mine, I'm working on improving.

Living Dead

Chapter One

She rarely dreamed of him anymore.

His face had faded over the years and she could hardly bring his features to mind, not in the great detail that had been etched so vividly in her eighteen year old memory.

Last night had been different. She'd seen him distinctly, she'd felt him - the unmistakable cool marble of his chest pillowed under her head. For a moment, she'd almost smelled his scent, just a hint - but enough to make the memories of their time together crash once again into her long numbed heart.

Ten years had still not broken the habit of glancing toward the window when the dreams woke her. Ten years hadn't stopped the pain that would come from her subconscious having free-run with her emotions. Ten years had however, seen her keep her window closed. After the first few months of leaving it open, desperately staring into the night and praying for his return, she'd finally closed it - and her heart once and for all.

With wakefulness came her conscious mind, and with a firm shake of her head she banished her wanton sub-conscious once again. With a frown she rose, hugging her arms around her against the chill in her body. She turned to the window without a moments thought for the old habit that came with the dreams. Suddenly, the vision of his perfect alabaster chest, shirt undone, and his unmistakable scent overcame her. Her heart pounded, filling the room.

It was gone almost as quickly as it came but as always, it managed to undo her, no matter how briefly. For a heartbeat she was seventeen again. For a heartbeat he loved her still, and she was his world. For a heartbeat, she still filled his thoughts and she imagined him seeing the sunrise with only her in his mind. Then her heart would beat once too many times and the fantasy was gone, the bittersweet pain in her chest, the way her stomach flipped at the idea that he would indeed still love her. The truth as she knew it was that he would invariably not have thought of her from that day onwards, that some other distraction was now getting his attention. She tried not to think about his full attention.

A very hot shower, almost hotter than she could stand always served to eradicate any lingering effects of the now infrequent dreams. Once, she'd grieved herself almost to death. When her life restarted, her morning shower became a shield for her. Never again would she allow her conscious thoughts to run to him and the hotter the water the further he was removed. All thoughts and chilly feelings of his icy marble most perfect skin were always burned away.

A scratching on the front door followed by a pathetic whine had her bounding down the stairs and throwing it open, her face smiling sympathetically.

"True, did he lock you out baby, c'mon, let's get something nice"

She leaned down to body-rub her black and white Border Collie as he wriggled his whole body at her. His kisses washed her face before she could pull back far enough, and his tail whipped her legs, no second invitation required.

"You're pretty sprightly today for an old boy, aren't you my love." She bit her lip at her own comment, pushing away the thought of just how old her boy really was.

True was nine years old, a present from Charlie. More like a desperate attempt from Charlie to make her reconnect to the world. It had worked though, and in approximately five seconds flat at that. True, a skinny little bundle of black and white fur and only days old, had been abandoned. He'd been found on an old property on the outskirts of Forks. Charlie had been checking into claims of squatters in the area, and that's when he found the tiny shivering pup trying to suckle from his ice cold dead mother. His litter mates hadn't survived. The vet confirmed later that the mother had gotten into difficulties passing a pup. She'd been dead for a good day or more. Somehow True had hung on. Charlie didn't hesitate to take him home to Bella. She knew all about trying to hang on.

It was a match made in heaven for Bella - and for True. More than once Charlie had marveled at the connection they had, True never leaving her side unless she made him stay home, and even then he would spend all his time watching the driveway, a stoic sentinel to her return. Charlie doubted there could ever be a love greater than the one shared by his daughter and her canine.

The phone rang as she pulled down the box of dog biscuits from the kitchen cupboard. Grabbing it from the wall bracket she cradled it between her shoulder and ear, and fished out a couple of heart shaped liver treats. True trembled before her, sitting as straight as a die, paw outstretched.

"Swan residence" she said brightly, then smiled warmly, dusting her hands off as True headed for the living room rug to devour his breakfast.

"Hey Bells," Charlies voice answered her. "Did you sleep well?"

She knew then that he'd heard her in the night and swallowed carefully before she continued, forcing her voice to be almost overly bright.

"Sure did Dad, I guess you heard me though…" she asked him, deciding suddenly that being direct might be much easier than days of him hovering. She couldn't take the hovering anymore.

"Um… no, did you dream honey? – you haven't had that kind of dream for a long time …" Bella may not have had Edwards gift for reading minds, but her fathers was always an open book to her. He was genuinely surprised, and worse still - now he sounded worried.

"Oh, nothing special… I thought since you were asking I must have been talking in my sleep." It wasn't far from the truth, she thought to herself.

Charlie was silent for a moment. "No, I didn't hear you but I just wanted you to know from me first… I saw Alice Cullen in town. I think she's back to sell the house or something."

"Oh," Bella managed, her first reaction to suck in a lungful of air. She immediately regretted it. No doubt Charlie had heard.

She was more than a little disappointed in her reaction. After all this time this kind of news should not have elicited such a response from her. To her knowledge the Cullen house was still just that, so they still had property in the area, so it had always made sense to Bella that one day, perhaps in her lifetime even, one of them at least would have to come back. At the beginning, she'd hoped it would be soon. As the years had passed she'd become calmer about it, believing more and more that she'd never ever lay eyes on any of them again.

"Um… Bella, are you ok honey?" Charlie knew her to well. It had only been ten years. To Bella, ten years was a lifetime ago, but to Charlie it was still only yesterday - and he'd never forget the fear of watching his daughter slip away before his eyes, powerless to save her.

She sighed carefully; "I'm fine; I knew this day would come and honestly, Dad – I don't care, I'm not eighteen anymore, and I know I put you through a lot then and you know I regret that, you know I regret everything I said, everything I did…" but Charlie cut her off.

"Bells – stop. I know – I know all that stuff. I just thought it might be a shock to the system, sort of take you by surprise, so I wanted to tell you before you bumped into her."

"Ok, - well thanks, I really love you for worrying, but honestly, I'm just fine – and I'm now…." she looked quickly at her watch "about to be late for work. Do you want to have dinner at the diner tonight?"

"Sure honey, whatever you think…" she was relieved to hear Charlies voice relaxing.

She quickly hung up then leaned her hands against the counter tops, gently hanging her head. She breathed slowly, decisively, eyes closed, meaning every breath, measuring, and counting. There were no tears, no trembling nor feeling faint. The day had come, and to her relief she really didn't feel that bad. The minor shock at hearing the news from Charlie was relegated to a nothing in the Cullen corner of her mind. Now as a more mature young lady of twenty eight, the only thing really bugging her was that when she did run into Alice, she wouldn't have aged a bit.

Bella was already late leaving the house so after quickly setting True up for the day with fresh water and kibble, having last cuddles and promises of walks after work, she decided a detour for a coffee wouldn't take that much more time, the day was already getting painfully out of control.

Parking was a bigger problem than she'd anticipated that blustery Monday morning, but even having to walk almost a block didn't deter her. Coffee was a treat, and today she'd already made up her mind that she needed to spoil herself.

She was making good time, keeping her face turned down away from the gusting drizzle blowing around her. She'd almost reached the cafe when she was suddenly body slammed to the pavement.

"Oh my God I'm so sorry!" The voice was distinct and Bella didn't need to see her attacker to know it was Alice Cullen. Cool hands were pulling at her, trying to help her up, but she waved them away with a groan.

"I didn't see you! I'm so so sorry, please! – let me help you." The cool hands were very insistent and kept plucking at Bella, trying to encourage her to rise. The voice continued, alternating between apology and panic and all the while telling Bella she hadn't seen her. Still lying on her side, Bella did a quick inventory before she allowed herself to move. This was going to hurt later she told herself, grimacing at the throb building in her shoulder. Somewhere there was a sore spot on her head and she wondered if she'd been laying there for more than the few seconds she felt like it had been. Suck it up Swan. She had to get up, and by herself. The very last thing she needed was her first meeting with a Cullen to have her at a disadvantage, not to mention looking like crap.

Cautiously optimistic nothing was broken, Bella eased herself up from the damp pavement - with the help of Alice's frantic hands. She dusted herself off, looking at Alice for the first time. She was still beautiful, Pixie-Like, her golden eyes more beautiful than Bella had remembered and Bella's stomach lurched at what she herself might have been - if only.

"Hi Alice…" she said, her tone even, without inflection.

If Alice could have blushed she would have been the color of a beet; "Oh, Bella! – I'm so sorry, I was just coming out of the Lawyers office and the wind must have caught the door and well… I didn't think..."

She reached out to take Bella's hand, but Bella chose instead to pull her hand away to tidy her hair back behind her ear.

Bella gave her a genuine smile. "It's fine Alice, I'm quite unhurt" then a thought occurred to her and she heard herself saying " I'm sure I'm not broken and bleeding so there's a plus for a change. How have you been Alice?" Bella maintained her pleasant smile, never taking her eyes from the raven haired beauty before her.

Alice's face fell, then she smiled back quickly, but the smile didn't reach her amber eyes. Bella felt some gratification that her words had hit the mark so effectively.

"Um… good, Bella, I…. we've been good…. I'm just back to..."

"Hmm… the house, you're selling… or so the rumor mill goes. You've got to love Forks!" Bella never took her eyes from the vision before her. Somehow her mouth was saying words but her mind was reeling back through the years to that magical time when they were all together. Alice hadn't changed a bit. Knowing that as fact but seeing it as fact was a whole new ball game for Bella.

"Um.. the house… yes… but it's not… oh…" then she stopped, and sighed. "How are you really Bella" her voice was as gentle and melodic as Bella had ever heard it.

The swift change of topic away from anything to do with the Cullen estate didn't surprise Bella, nor did the automatic smoke and mirrors exclusion really hurt that much.

"Sorry Alice, I didn't mean to pry. I'm good Alice, just fine thanks except" Bella made a show of looking down at her watch. " I'm going to have to run, I'm pretty late for work today."

Alice pursed her lips and reached out, taking Bella's hand in hers, squeezing it gently. Bella did not return the squeeze, rather waiting patiently for Alice to return her hand.

"It's good to see you Bella." Alice whispered.

Bella smiled again then turning purposefully towards the cafe called out "Good bye Alice…my regards to the family." Alice watched her walk away, and if Bella had turned perhaps she would have seen the pain in Alice's face.

The cafe smelled wonderful as usual. Bella never tired of the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and couldn't help but order a warm cinnamon roll as well. So she had two weaknesses now. Today she deserved them both.

"Bella love, you look like you've seen a ghost, are you alright dear?" Mrs Hanson asked her as she prepared Bella's coffee. Inwardly, Bella laughed at the cliché wishing in some ways she could say that it was actually a vampire and not a ghost, but she didn't.

Instead she smiled warmly at the elderly lady and shook her head. "No, just took a little tumble outside…"

Mrs Hanson grimaced. "Oh, love, you need to be more careful!"

Bella nodded to appease her. "I'm fine, really – actually it wasn't my fault."

Mrs. Hanson raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "This time…really?"

"Alice Cullen just bumped into me, literally." Bella explained dryly.

"You know, I saw that Cullen girl yesterday and I swear she hasn't aged a day!" Mrs. Hanson now mollified about her accident went back to bagging her purchase.

"Must have had work done." Bella suggested innocently.

"I think so… you know I think you must be right about that…" Mrs. Hanson prattled on a little more about why Alice would be back, and the big house in the forest being empty for such a long time, and all the other gossip around Forks about the Cullens.

Bella nodded politely, answering when she had to, her mind busy on other things – like controlling the pain in her shoulder that was starting to really make its presence felt.

"I am so late!" Bella chanted through gritted teeth as she hurried down the wide hospital hallways to the administration section, juggling her bag, two coffees and a paper bag that was getting more and more scrunched by the minute. It was with relief that she finally made it into her office unseen. Her assistant wasn't at her desk so she set down her now luke-warm coffees and cold cinnamon rolls on her own desk. In theory it had been a great idea to swing by and grab them, she and Phoebe both had a weakness a good coffee, but the reality was everything needed reheating. The trip from the cafe might have been short, but the weather not so friendly to warm pastries and hot coffee. No matter, she was looking forward to her caffeine and carbohydrate crutch.

Since she was going to have to detour to the kitchenette for a reheat she decided it would be prudent to check the damage done by her fall before anyone else commented on her appearance. In the bathroom adjacent to her office she carefully moved her shirt away from her shoulder and grimaced at the angry bruise already blushing her skin.

She closed her eyes and sighed. "Hi Alice, nice to be body-slammed by you… still working out?" she grumbled to herself, chiding herself for having put herself in this situation. Why couldn't she have just come to work instead of giving into her coffee craving.

"Here I go again…" she murmured to her reflection, her jaws clenched tightly. Already her head was starting to pound. Tentatively she touched the bump on the side of her head and hissed at the sudden sting. Looking at her fingers she saw a faint smear of red. Her eyes widened at just what her hair was still hiding. Thankfully a more detailed inspection showed only a light graze to the surface of the bump and a tiny amount of dried blood. Satisfied there wasn't too much to be concerned over she searched her handbag for Tylenol and then rolled her eyes – again. True to her haphazard morning, she'd left them beside her bed.

"Ok, down to see Nick" she grumbled to herself resigning herself to having absolutely nothing go her way today. She tried not to think about what she was going to tell him.

Bella had been working at Forks hospital since she'd left school. It was something she'd really fallen into, no pun intended, and she'd taken to it like the proverbial duck to water. Instead of going away to college she decided to enroll externally and completed her business studies over the internet, only visiting the college campus when she absolutely had to.

By the time she'd washed her face and re-applied her lipstick Bella could hear Phoebe in the outer office. She checked the mirror once more, took a deep breath and made sure her game face was on.

"Hey Phoebe – how was your weekend?" Bella asked brightly as she exited her office. She tried not to let Phoebe see how careful her movements were.

"Hey, Bella – look I'm really sorry – I'll make the time up… I just couldn't help it today… I was running late and then my car! Oh my God! That heap of junk…" but Bella waved away the excuse with a laugh.

"Phoebe, I dare you to have had a worse day than I have had today – and I know I'm going to win that bet, - I've only just arrived myself."

Phoebe looked relieved. "You did? I mean, ok, great, yes you did – and you're the best you know that? – but, what happened to you?" Bella could see Phoebe start to give her the full top to toe appraisal, her car nightmare relegated to forgotten.

Bella shook her head and smirked. "You just wouldn't believe me if I told you – but lets just say to add to my woe I've left my Tylenol at home so I'm going to see if I can steal some from Nick – be back in a minute."

Bella made a bee-line for the door, ignoring the look of sympathy in Phoebe's eyes. Since her accident she'd tried to ignore the sympathy in everyone's eyes.

"Oh, and there's coffee and comfort food on my desk… if you're willing to do the honors?" she didn't need to look back to know the delight that little remark would have caused.

The hospital halls were still reasonably quiet and Bella made it all the way to the Admissions section without any further interruptions. She had just managed to convince herself that she'd be fine until she got home that afternoon, then she heard his voice.

"Bella" she turned quickly, the sudden movement causing her to grimace at the pain grabbing her shoulder and neck.

"Hey, Nick… ouch!" she stared into his deep blue eyes.

"Now that doesn't sound like the most promising start to the day?"

There was little point in sugar coating things to Nick; the man literally had X-Ray vision. Bella sighed.

"I had a bit of a tumble this morning and before you say anything it wasn't my fault, but I've left my Tylenol at home and I was hoping I could just …."

Nick put his hand up to silence her, grinning at her. He couldn't fully disguise the immediate worry in his eyes from her though.

"Ok, ok, I get it, slow down – and follow me…" He turned to walk backwards, making a sweeping bow before her. Bella would have rolled her eyes at his antics if it wouldn't have made her head hurt so much.

Dr Nick Hunter had arrived at the hospital in the years following the departure of Carlisle Cullen. It hadn't been easy for the tiny town of Forks to attract a doctor that was not only committed to their community, but was settled enough to stay in a small town, not looking to move on after a year or two as others had. As nice as Nick Hunter was, it had still been even harder for Bella to meet yet another milestone. It was one more firm slap in the face to cement the fact that the Cullens were really gone, permanently.

"Are you sure you've got the time now?" she asked, feeling a little guilty at whining so easily at him, not to mention the regret at giving him quite so much detail. It shouldn't have surprised her that he wasn't going to hand over the pills quite so easily.

He guided her into an exam room and helped her to sit up on the bed, slipping her shoes off for her. "For you, always…" he told her playfully, putting them neatly on the floor so she'd be able to slip them back on easily.

"I'm fine really, just got a bruise starting on my shoulder and my headache is getting a little…" she stopped and closed her eyes, sighing…. "Who am I kidding, I feel like death warmed up and the headache is moving to out of control status – which could be fixed! – if I can just have some Tylenol?" Bella bit her lip and smiled as innocently as she could.

Nick nodded, his face passive as he listened. "So - I'm going to ignore the fact you only want me for my drugs – and you can tell me where it hurts."

She gingerly moved her shirt to expose her shoulder. Nick screwed his face up and grimaced. "and I think I need this shirt off too."

"We're probably going to need to get you an X-Ray kiddo, anywhere else I need to know about?" Nick held his hand out for the navy hospital uniform shirt Bella was grudgingly unbuttoning. She held it out, her face a little paler than he'd like it to be. Even before he'd started her exam his mind was ticking boxes, underlining them to come back to later. Shock hadn't been ruled out yet, no matter how long ago this incident happened.

Bella was a creature of habit, and Nick new them all. She didn't need to ask and he didn't need to offer. Bella needed to be warm, being cold upset her, shivering upset her and right now he wanted her as calm as possible until he had fully accessed her.

He nudged her to lie down; carefully swinging her stockinged feet up onto the bed, then turned to get a soft cotton blanket from the warmer and tucked it around her. He set about examining her carefully, asking questions, sometimes verbally, sometimes just a questioning look. He could have examined Bella with his eyes blindfolded and still know every inch of her body. She felt the start of his question before he could ask.

"My back is fine" Bella sighed, choosing to stare at the ceiling rather than meet his eyes. "I landed on my side, not my back…"

"Ok… "Nick worked in silence for a few more moments. "Tell me from the top what happened. He raised an eyebrow when the name "Cullen" come up and Bella wondered if she should have stuck with "someone bumped into me" rather than "Alice Cullen body-slammed me."

"Are you Ok with that?" Nick asked, eying her critically.

Bella nodded. "God Nick, you sound like Charlie! It was a long time ago and yes I'm fine."

Nick lifted his hands in surrender. "I was only asking… I'm glad you're Ok with it."

"There is nothing to be Ok with! – So Alice is here to do whatever with whatever… none of my business and frankly Nick I don't want to know! - her presence here has already – ouch! Bella jumped as Nick's gentle probing found the egg on her head.

"And you were going to tell me you hit your head… when?"

"For heavens sake, I told you, I hit the pavement, I was a bit stunned… whatever, it's my shoulder that's hurting..."

"And you've got a headache, you already told me that Missy, so you just won yourself a CT scan as well – look at it as a two-for-one Monday morning special" Nick told her glibly.

Bella scowled at him then started to pull herself up only to have her attempts thwarted.

"Oh no you don't…" she tried again to get herself upright.

"Oh yes I do….and remember, I can write paperwork too… if I'm pushed…" Nick raised an eyebrow and waited for the fight to go out of her. Finally he felt her start to relax.

"You can stay there, I want to get you done quickly so I can give you something for the pain before this gets out of hand." He smiled down at her, then patted her head and left the room to make the arrangements.

Bella stared at the ceiling trying to calm her rising fury.

Why was it that when a Cullen was involved her life became so unbearably complicated.