Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. And anyone who thinks I do has obviously been drinking some of 'Upscale British' Quatre's tea.

Author's Notes: These are not to be taken seriously. I just wanted to joke around about the rules that seem to be set in stone for 1x2 fan fictions. I really find them silly. That's why I'm not longer a fan of 1x2, infact the shear thought makes me want to hurl. I'm a full blown 2x5 girl now.

I'm not meaning to offend anyone with my commandments. This is just for fun. Don't hate me.

Oh and another thing. I am NOT on drugs. Thank you.

Our word is law.

Ten Commandments (+some) of Gundam Wing 1x2 Fanfics

I. Plots don't matter. As long as the end result is the same, it doesn't matter how you get there. And if you have to distort stuff and the laws of physics to make it work, oh well. In fact, that makes it more believable.

II. Personalities matter even less that plots. If anyone thinks that your portrayal of the characters were wrong just tell them that it is quite obvious that it was a mistake on the part of the writers of Gundam Wing, not you. Your portrayal is perfect and if the pilots wouldn't have acted that way in Gundam Wing, they should have. If you don't like a certian aspect of their personality, do away with it. Lord knows, all the other authors have.

III. The only thing that could ever matter less than personalities, is grammar. Why make your fic easy to read!? The readers will thank you for giving them a riddle to solve. And plus, isn't it more fun just to guess at how a word is spelled then to have to go look in that awful thing called a 'dictionary'? So do away with that abomination that microsoft likes to call 'spell check' and go ahead and spell hilarious like "hylereus". It's improvization, not a misspelling.

IV. The less the reader sees of the other pilots the better. Limit their appearance to one paragraph at the most. Remember, less is indeed more.

V. Except of course when describing either Duo's or Heero's hair. You must be sure to spend vast quantities of time and space describing hair. Remember, describing their hair is much more important than focusing on personalities and if you have to use large similes that don't even make sense, so be it.

VI. There must be multiple reiterations of how opposite Heero and Duo are. Some examples include, but are not limited to:
Fire and water, angel and devil, hot and cold, summer and winter, good and evil, Autobot and Decepticon, red and blue, democrat and republican, yin and yang, and Scorpio and Aquarius.

VII. Duo must tell Heero of his tragic past (or vise versa) and break down while Heero soothingly comforts him. This must also happen within the first or second chapter.

VIII. Duo must always submit to Heero in some way. Always! The writers were wrong in portraying him as a strong, independent character. He clearly cannot live a single day without Heero.

IX. Heero is, in reality, a mushy, romantic sap and is to kill himself, or everyone else, if anything were to happen to Duo. And if he is to kill himself, it has to be in some way rebellious against people in general to express his undying love.

X. One of them must be shot, raped, and/or captured while the other must come to the rescue. But don't worry about the recovery time for any injury, it isn't important, just focus on the fact that they did get hurt at some point in time. Sometime, somewhere, this must happen.

XI. There must be angst. Lots and lots of angst! I don't care what type of fic you're writing, if it doesn't angst like an emo than you just suck at writing.

XII. The pilots must always be stuck in a safe house some where with each other for long, extended periods of time. It doesn't matter that on the show, the pilots really only saw each other when their missions happened to coincide and disreguard the fact that housing all of them at the same location would just make them an easier target for the enemy. The people who wrote the show obviously just aren't as smart as you.

XIII. There must be Relena bashing. And lots of it.

XIV. The rules are not to be deviated from, altered or otherwise created into something original, for that would result in disastrous consequences. Please keep them in mind while writing.

If you can think of any other commandments that I forgot, please remind me. But please comment.