Scroll One
"How do you stand the Akatsuki Macintoshes?" Sasuke yelled angrily, "They're so vexing!"
"How are the Macintoshes annoying? I find them quite calming," Renate argued doggedly.
"You're just saying that because you're afraid to get your precious pink tunic blighted!"
"Shut up, before I beat the infallibility out of you!"
"Make me you imperious Sheika!
"How in the world can you handle her Orochimaru-sama?"
"Well, Kabuto, you have to be firm but gentle with her. Not as gentle as the precarious Hyuuga girl, but gentle nonetheless. As for the firm side, you have to reiterate what you say, but eventually she listens. When you become a sensei you must be impartial, but don't let your punishments have dire consequences."
"Thank you for the advice. The Hyuuga girl's first name is Hinata, by the way. Is Renate really the heiress of your clan, sensei?"
"Well she's my only daughter, so she's duly the heiress of the Sheika clan. Well, daughter to the woman I married. The others… Well, that's how the Akatsuki made their money at the time."
"Holy cow! Renate beat Sasuke up so bad she turned him into a moor!"
"Orochimaru-sensei, what's a moor?"
"You should know that by now, Renate."
"Well, I kinda don't so could someone explain, please?"
"Allow me, Orochimaru-sensei. A moor is a wide open area, often with bogs."
"I'm still confused Kabuto-kun. What's a bog?"
"A bog is a marsh. How do you manage to be so self-possessed in public, but a time bomb in private, Orochimaru?"
"I don't know. I've been like that for as long as I can remember."
"How can you just say that and shrug? And stop saying words I don't know darn it!"
"Renate, if you'll calm down and stop yelling, I'll make you a deal. If you don't understand a word I say, just say the Japanese word for 'what'. If you beat someone else to a pulp, the writing's on the wall."
"What's that mean?"
"I know what it means! Can I explain it, dad?"
"MayI explain it, and yes you may, Renate."
"Kabuto-kun, when someone says 'the writing's on the wall' they're basically saying 'destruction is imminent.'"
"Was?"
"Good grief Kabuto. You're turning my clan into human dictionaries."
"I'm sorry, Orochimaru-sama."
"Imminent means likely to happen soon. By the way, that was a very good idea to use the German word for what, Kabuto-kun."
"Renate, you're a lifesaver. Thank you for the definition and compliment."
"You're welcome. Hey, Kabuto, I've got a question for you."
"Fire away, Ren-chan."
"OK, make that two."
"Still fire away."
"Ok, one, why are you calling me Ren-chan, and two, will you go out with me?"
"Renate, you filthy, miserable cur."
"Sasuke, shut up. To answer your question Renate, I'm calling you Ren-chan because girls that are as beautiful and novel as you are scarce in Otogakure. On that note, in any hidden shinobi village, not just sound. Why do you ask?"
"Well…I, um… That is… um…"
"Renate, how insecure are you? How much infirmity do you have even though you've been in your new habitation for a year?"
"Sasuke, shut up! Just shut up! You'll never understand how a kunoichi feels, never!"
"Nice going, Sasuke! You made the strongest kunoichi in Otogakure bawl her eyes out. I could tell by her tone of voice that she was really fervent about it, and she honestly meant it. If you don't shut up on your own accord I will endeavor to do it for you! Renate! Ren-chan, where are you? I want to talk to you!"
"You and Kabuto are too soft on her Orochimaru…"
"Kabuto's right, Sasuke. If you can't say anything nice to Renate, you need to keep your mouth shut. You need to learn to presume responsibility for your words and actions."
"Renate. Renate, may I come in please?"
"Go away! If Sasuke hasn't learned his lesson-"
"Renate please let me in. You want the answer to your second question don't you?"
"You - hic - interrupted me. That's - hic - exactly what I'm - hic - talking about."
"OK, I'm sorry for interrupting you. Please let me in Renate, please. Renate, I love you. Please let me in, please. Your answer is -"
"If your answer - hic-"
"Have you been crying?"
"Yes… not that - hic - it matters to you."
"Yes, it does matter. Renate, please emanate so that I may see thy beautiful face."
"And you're talking like that, why?"
"Hmmm…. How to put it? Your room is the east and you are the sun! Good night Renate-sama."
Two days later Renate is looking for Kabuto to get the answer to her question.
"Daddy, have you seen Sasuke and Kabuto-kun lately? I haven't seen them for two days."
"Don't worry Renate. They're young men; they can take care of themselves."
"Oh Kabuto, Kabuto, wherefore art thou Kabuto? If only you could change your name or I mine."
"I'll be whoever you want me to be. As long as you don't leave me to go off to some other boy, that is. It looks like we are quoting Romeo and Juliet again."
"Yes, it seems we are."
"You sound dulled. Are you all right?"
"It's just… Well, you and Sasuke were gone so long; it was really lonely and boring. I guess you could say the loneliness was from not talking to you and not tormenting Sasuke. Kabuto, it's been terrible without you. You know what; I'm going to ask again. Will you go out with me?"
"How could I say 'No' to the perfect kunoichi? Sigh… Renate, you get depressed over such little things. On that note, you get any emotion very strongly from such little things. I like that on the positive emotions but you go overboard on the negative ones, sweetheart. Please try to stay as calm as Orochimaru-sama when it comes to the negative emotions. By all means, get as crazy as you want when it comes to your positive ones, though. Sigh… I'll see you later, I'm going to bed."
Kabuto lay in bed thinking about when he and Sasuke were in the Land of Lakes. Having to go to the Land of Lakes wasn't that bad, he thought. The worst part of it was Renate being excluded from the mission. The scariest had been when a shuriken the size of Orochimaru-sama's ribcage had been unnecessarily thrown at him. The most thrilling had been when it careened at a very light tap from his kunai knife. Yet there had been thoughts of never seeing Renate again. Somehow, Sasuke could have sworn he'd seen his brother, Itachi, in the water. He remembered how Sasuke had shared his memories of Itachi massacring the Uchiha clan and telling him to kill his best friend so he could get the Mangekyou Sharingan. However after breaking his best friend's neck, thankfully not paralyzing him, Sasuke decided to acquire the power a different way.
"Kabuto, can you help me out here for a minute?" Sasuke's voice cut into his thoughts.
"Sure. What can I do you for?"
"The Village took a vote on who was going to be the next Otokage and Orochimaru wants us to tally up the votes."
"And we're voting why?"
"Otokage-sama had a hard time choosing between two candidates because they're pretty much at the same experience level. He had the village pick which person was better suited for the title of Otokage. Tell you what, let's split the votes between us and each of us will split our piles into candidate piles."
"So each of us will take our pile and put one person's name in one pile, and the other person's name in another?"
"Yup. OK?"
"OK."
Three days later Orochimaru is preparing to announce his successor's name to Otogakure.
"OK, Otogakure. Do you want to know who my successor is?"
"Yeah!"
"Spit it out you old geezer!"
"Can it, Zaku! Orochimaru-dono is still in his early thirties!"
"Would you lot shut up? I want to know who the second Otokage is!"
A hush fell over the crowd at Renate's yell.
"Thank you Renate. As I was saying the votes have been tallied by two of my students and the second Otokage is Sheika Renate!"
"What? That bossy-"
"Zaku, you don't want to finish that sentence!"
"Shut your trap, Kabuto!"
"Make me! I'll defend Renate-sama with my life! Even if it means putting an Otonin in a coma, I'll defend her!"
"What are you, her boyfriend?"
"Yeah, I am!"
"All of you, shut up!" A hush fell over the crowd, this time at Kimimaro's yell.
"Renate do you accept the rank, title and honor of Second Otokage?"
"Yes, Orochimaru-san, I do."
"Then if you'll come by my house later, I'll give you the kage robes."
"Of course, thank you."
"Okay, next item of business. Chunin exams. Genin, your jonin teachers will recommend you. Chunin, while the genin are at the Chunin exams, I'm going to hold an ANBU - black ops Exam. Genin and Jonin are going to the exams together. Genin may go back to their homes if they wish."
With quite a few of the genin leaving the assembly, there were calls of 'see you guys tomorrow!' and 'Congratulations, Renate-sama!' After about five minutes, it quieted down again.
"As I was saying to the Jonin, you must accompany your students to the Chunin exams. If you do not wish to go, you may assign an ANBU member to go in your stead. Failure to do so will result in your students' failure in the exam, and I know that you do not want that embarrassment. ANBU, if you are asked to step in, I want you to treat the Genin as if they were your own students. Chunin, the ANBU exam is an Otogakure only tradition. You may try as often or as little as you like, but you normally don't become a member of the ANBU - black ops on your first try, so I suggest you keep trying. The Chunin and ANBU are dismissed. Jonin, if you want to recommend your students for the Chunin exam, there are forms at the academy. You're dismissed."
After thirty minutes of 'goodbyes' and 'congratulations', Renate and Orochimaru went home.
"Renate, stay on your toes. If any other Shinobi village figures this out, they will kill you."
"Yes, Sir! Kabuto! Where are you? I want to talk to you."
"I'll leave you two alone, then."
"Thanks, dad! Kabuto-kun!"
"Yes? You called Renate-sama?"
"Kabuto, I've got a question for you. Not as the Otokage or as the Sheika clan heiress, mind you."
"OK. What is it?"
"Will you marry me?"
"I…Wh-what? Are you…I mean…have you?"
"Have I what?"
"Have you asked sensei?"
"Have I asked him what?"
"Asked him permission to get engaged!"
"SHHH! Keep it down! No, I haven't. Why?"
"I'm not going to give you your answer until you do."
"I…OK. Daddy! Daddy, wo bist du?"
"Right here, why?"
"Daddy, can I get married?"
"What? Who the hell have you been seeing behind your squad mates' backs?"
"Yakushi, Kabuto."
"I… Oh, all right, since we already know the lad."
"Thank you, Oh, thank you, daddy! You won't regret it! Kabuto-kun! He said okay! Kabuto- kun!"
"Sigh…teenagers," Orochimaru says while Renate continues to yell.
"Kabuto-kun! Kabuto-kun where are you?"
"He's in the dojo, why?"
"Sasuke! What are you doing here?"
"Nothing. What's with all the noise? And why the hell are you looking for Kabuto?"
"Nii-kun go boom!"
"Holy crap, Kabuto! Don't do that!"
"Nii-kun! He said yes! Daddy said yes!"
"Yeah, I know, sensei told me."
"Yeah! We are Fighting Dreamers Takami wo mezashite…"
"Renate, enough of the fighting dreamers!"
"Oh, come on Sasuke. Why do I gotta-?"
"Okay, enough bickering. Renate, let's leave Sasuke alone to his stupidity."
"OK!"
"You know you have a really wild split personality."
"And you have a serene one. What do you mean wild personality?"
"Well, you can be calm sometimes and others you can be as wild as a bijuu."
"That's bipolar for you! By the way, what's a bijuu?"
"One of the nine tailed demons, each ranging with a number of tails from one to nine."
"And there are nine demons?"
"Yes, I just said that. Now, you also can be sweet as can be but you can also be as blood thirsty as the Kyuubi. Do you even know what serene means?"
"Probably not."
"Serene means calm, peaceful, undisturbed."
"Oh, Okay!"
"Hey, uh, when do you want to get married?"
"I don't know, but we have to plan it out."
"Yeah we do. Hey, how about in October?"
"No we want to do it when there's nothing going on that month and dad's birthday is October 27th."
"Hmm . . . You're right. Let's see, August 12 is your birthday, so we can't do it then. December is Christmas, November is . . ."
"Nothing!"
"Yes there is. Thanksgiving"
"Bah, humbug. Who give a crap about that useless holiday?"
"Then there's February."
"Valentines Day"
"March."
"That might work. Let's make a list. Okay, so there's September, November, March and April. When else?"
"May and June"
"Mothers Day and Fathers Day. July would work too. When's your birthday?"
"Let's just have the wedding in November."
"Alright, works for me."