A/N: This was one of those random ideas that just happened. The title popped in my head, and I made up a story to fit it. I'm still shocked I wrote 7 pages of it in one night...that's not normal for me when writing fanfic. lol
I want to give a huge thank you to my betas: Nathy, Nicole, and Robin. And a thank you to Mahtra for her suggestions earlier on. Nathy, this fic is dedicated to you because of the Andy-McNally-type-of-bad-luck week you had. I hope it helps your new week start off a little better. :)
The time frame of this story is AU. I wanted it to be summer rain, so just pretend the breakup happened in the Summer and the events in this fic happened not long after.
Hope you enjoy it!
"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." – Dolly Parton
The rain often bewildered her; on some days, it brought about peace, motivation, and made her see beauty – on others, it simply just depressed her. During those days, she felt as if the rain was mocking her already overwhelmed emotions; yet, it sometimes seemed to instill an odd sense of comfort within her, as if the rain understood what she was going through and wanted to provide a cathartic outlet. Was there a reason behind her conflicting views about how the rain made her feel? She didn't know, but she definitely hoped she would find out. Maybe, just maybe, if she did, her life would start to make more sense.
"Stupid, stupid rain. It's not like I need a reminder of that night in order to remember it," Andy grumbled while picking up her dirty clothes, roughly slamming each piece, one by one, into the basket. She briefly considered making a paper target with his name under a red bull's eye and taping it to the bottom of the basket, but decided that it wasn't necessary - her anger and the heat outside were fuel enough.
Trying to rid herself of the extra energy, she used it to her advantage and was able to wash a few loads of clothes. She knew the folding would have to wait, though; otherwise, the clean clothes may have ended up as more substitutes for darts.
A few hours later, Andy was exhausted from her impromptu cleaning spree. She had never spent so much time cleaning in her entire life. She tasked herself with not only cleaning out the refrigerator, but also completely re-organizing her kitchen cabinets. She then moved onto dusting surfaces that she couldn't recall dusting since moving in. And while her apartment was in need of the cleansing, it was her mind that craved it. However, her effort went un-rewarded. She should have known it was useless – no matter what she did, he invaded every nook and cranny in her mind.
With a loud sigh, she gave into the exhaustion and collapsed onto the couch, attempting to take a nap.
But no sooner than she had managed to place the throw pillow under her head and turn onto her side, she heard it - the sound of a rumbling sky, which only meant one thing.
The rain was back.
It had let up for awhile following her second load of laundry, providing her some relief, but now it had returned with a roar. She couldn't distract herself any longer and finally relinquished what little control she had left. The tears came down as hard as the rain, and an hour later, the wells had temporarily dried and both she and the rain went to sleep.
As she awoke from her three hour tear-induced nap, Andy heard the dreaded rain drops continue to pound away. She wasn't certain if it was the intensity of her emotions or the rain itself, but she briefly wondered if the building now had a tin roof. Had it always been that loud? Recognizing that her thoughts were both figuratively and literally muddled by the rain, she decided that her cluttered head was messy enough for one afternoon and could use a hot coffee refresher. But you like 'messy'.
"Ugh," she groaned, internally begging her mind to shut off.
Making her way to the kitchen, she started to fill up the coffee pot with water. But of course, her mind refused to listen and turn itself off. Instead, it seemed to have an agenda.
"C'mon, McNally," Sam softly teased. "You know you can't resist."
"You or the coffee you're tempting me with?" she questioned with a quiet moan.
"Well, though I am both irresistible and tempting…" Sam smirked. "I was referring to this delectable aroma under your nose."
"Yeah, true…cuz the aroma you're giving off is more like the 'I-need-a-shower' kind," she stated into her pillow with a knowing smile.
"McNally, as soon as I set this coffee mug down, you will pay for that."
Andy shot straight up, aware that any hesitation would have resulted in her being tickled endlessly.
"Ok, I'm up. I'm up." Her words rushed out in a panic.
"That's what I thought."
Sam gave her a winning smile, as he knew her defeat was the fear of a tickle fight that she would ultimately lose. It was his secret weapon of choice, aside from his dimples, when he wanted her to do something. He thought of it as his twist on 'Simon Says', except it was 'Sam Says'. Though, if Andy had the slightest knowledge of that thought, he wasn't afraid to admit to himself that she would kill him. His defense was that he only played the game when she was up to playing.
"Now that you've had your cat nap, it's time to get ready. Our dinner reservation is at 7."
"But, Sam…your couch is more comfy than those hard chairs at the restaurant," she whined.
"McNally." On the other hand, it wasn't just the dimples and tickle fight fears - his TO voice always appeared to give him an advantage.
"Fine. I'm going," she grumbled, lifting her tired body from the cushions.
Andy quickly snapped out of her flashback when she felt the cold water running over her hand. Looking down, she noticed the coffee pot was overflowing from the faucet water. She immediately turned off the faucet, poured the water out, and somehow didn't break the glass when she roughly placed it on the counter. I hate you, Sam Swarek. Ugh, no I don't. Her mind's apparent agenda was relentless.
Not knowing what else to do but run, she rushed outside into the rain, letting her feet guide her to some unknown destination.
Ten minutes later, she halted in her tracks, as the familiar door came in sight.
She should have known.
If she wasn't running from him, she was running to him. He was part of her, regardless of the situation or how she felt, or even where she was at. He was half of her heart, and without him, she didn't feel whole.
Carefully climbing the wet stairs, she knocked on his door, not having a clue of what she was going to say or do. All that she knew was that she needed him. Period.
A few moments passed before Sam opened the door.
"McNally? What are you doing here?" His tone was gentle, but full of surprise.
"I don't know," she shrugged. The pain in her voice was evident and accompanied the tears that were suddenly streaming down her face again. The overpowering emotions from both her day and the fact that she unconsciously ended up on his doorstep initiated another unstoppable round.
"Andy," he started. It was the same sound of concern which used to comfort her after a bad day. And that…that wasn't something she could handle right now.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come." She shook her head and turned around, bounding down the stairs. Her fear-based adrenaline kicked into high gear and took her a block down the street before she heard the sound of his voice calling out.
"Andy, wait! Please stop!" By the time she had heard him, her chest was burning, and she had no choice but to sink down to the wet ground. When she glanced up to see where she was at, she realized she was under the large oak tree in the practically secluded park near his house. Their tree.
Thankfully, or unfortunately…she wasn't sure yet which thought fit better…Sam slowly walked up to where she was sitting, before the sweet memories they had shared under this tree had a chance to haunt her thoughts.
"Hey," he said, cautiously.
"Hey." Her voice was cracked, as she was out of breath and still emotional.
"Can I sit down?"
Afraid her voice quality could still be fractured, she just nodded her head in reply.
The two sat there under their tree for several minutes merely listening to the sound of the water droplets pelting against the leaves. Andy's breath had eased, but both of their hearts were still racing with anxiety of where these moments could lead them.
It took five more minutes for Sam to acknowledge to himself that, when it came to the woman beside him, there were times where he had his own allergy to silence. Acting on the condition that only existed when it concerned her, he spoke the first thing that entered his head when he saw her under the tree.
"Do you remember the night you named this our tree?"
With a quiet voice and a few, stray tears lingering on her cheeks, she answered him.
"Yeah."
Pausing for a moment, Andy continued. "I remember that you complained when I wanted to carve our names into it. You said that we were too old for that." The smile on her face was barely visible, but it was still there.
"And then I told you that you were the one that was too old." With her words, her lips turned up just a little more.
"You know, despite how often my dad and I had played under the large tree that was in our backyard when I was a kid, and how much we enjoyed that tire swing, that night was the first time I had ever been tickled under a tree. I never imagined a first 'tickle moment' would have happened when I was an adult." Remembering how his fingers had dug into her sides until she shouted 'Mercy!', she finally allowed a small peek of her pearly whites.
"Well, that's what you get for calling me old. Though, as much of a kid at heart you are, I don't think you minded that much." Sam couldn't help but let a smirk slip out.
"I didn't," she agreed, risking a glance at him. Her eyes, tone, and grin were all filled with nostalgia.
Neither one of them wanted to break that nostalgic bubble, as it provided safety, but both knew that it would soon be popped anyway. In Sam's heart, he knew why Andy was on his doorstep; however, he understood that, especially after his idiotic mistake of letting her go, she deserved a chance to share what was in her heart. He didn't want to set himself up for disappointment, but a part of him held onto the hope that what led her to him today would lead them to back to each other, for good.
"Andy, why did you come today? You said you didn't know, but you and I both know that isn't true." His words were hushed; his goal for that moment was simply to keep her there long enough for them to talk, really talk.
"I just…I dunno…I was cleaning and considering-making-a-paper-target-with-your-name-on-it…and the next thing I know, my entire kitchen is spotless and re-organized. And remember, I like messy. Anyways, I ended up crying until I fell asleep and after I woke up, my mind still wouldn't stop, so I went to get some coffee. Of course, that just ended in me daydreaming long enough that the water flooded over onto my hands. So I did the only thing I knew to do…I ran and ran, not knowing where I was going, but I guess I should have known that I'd end up wherever you are." Her speech was rushed, but the speed of their hearts was faster.
"I hope you always do," Sam said, giving her a meaningful look.
"Sam," she sighed, both in awe and frustration.
"Look, Andy, I messed up and lost the best thing that ever happened to me, and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, if you'll let me…but don't you think there was a reason your instinct was to come to me, no matter how angry you are at me? I do, and it's not just because we've always had each other's backs at work; we've been partners both on and off the job since day one, whether you want to admit or not."
Her tears were instantly renewed, as his words touched her heart and soul. She was utterly shocked at his blunt honesty; she wasn't sure she had ever heard that many words out of his mouth at once, unless it involved him yelling at her for some stupid mistake she did on the job.
"I know," she softly let out. "But that doesn't mean I know where to go or what to do from here."
"Neither do I, but when I told you I couldn't wait to see where this was going, before you asked me to fix Marie's plumbing, I was already in it with you; I have been from the beginning. And if I'm not reading things wrong, you have been too."
Andy nodded her head again; her disbelief at how open he was being temporarily silenced her.
"So that means, thick or thin, no matter where this goes, I'm here."
"Then why did you leave me when things got thick? You promised me a fight."
"You're right, I did. But since I let what happened get the best of me, I'm now giving you the fight that I should have before. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I let you go. I took my anger at the world, and even Jerry, out on you, and it was stupid. I hate myself for it, but I promise you, that I'm ready to do things differently and never let you go again. And I would rather die than to break that promise. "
"Sam," she repeated gently, overwhelmed by his confessions.
"I mean it, Andy. I love you. I never stopped loving you, and I never will."
"I feel the same, Sam. I still love you, but how can I just jump head first right back into the thing that hurt me more than my mother abandoning me?"
With that thought, Andy's voice gradually rose to a muted yell.
"Do you not get that, Sam? You hurt me more than my mother ever has or ever could, because you mean more to me. You're the one who has been there for me, and then all of a sudden, you're gone, running just like she did. And yes, Sam, I went to Temagami, but that was only because I was trying to save both of our jobs. And of course our relationship meant more than our jobs, but it doesn't mean I wanted us to lose them. But what you did, Sam…I didn't do that. I didn't leave in the way my mother did. I didn't end our relationship because things got tough. I tried to be there for you, you know I did, but you wouldn't let me. How am I supposed to get past that?!"
Andy's admissions broke him even more than he already was, but he refused to let that stop him from getting his other half back.
"It won't be easy, Andy. But all I can do is ask you to at least try to trust me. Trust in us. Trust that we'll figure everything out because we're meant to be. I wasn't lying when I said I couldn't imagine my life without you in it."
Andy's tears re-emerged in that second. "Why do you do this, Sam? I'm so frustrated with you, and then you go and say something stupidly sweet. It makes it hard for us to fight this out." Her response was best described as a cry-filled chuckle.
"Like I told you before, McNally, I'm irresistible." Sam offered her his signature grin.
"I can't believe you remember that," she gasped.
"What do you mean?"
"That's umm…that coffee thing…that's what I was daydreaming about before I ran out of my apartment." Her tone was hushed; the man just kept throwing her for a loop.
"Really?" To say he was astonished was an understatement.
"Yeah," she breathed out.
Their eyes were locked onto the other, having a wordless conversation themselves. A minute later, Sam spoke, hoping his next confession would be the true ice breaker. After all, once Andy had told him about how she had put him on ice, he was adamant that he would never be on it again.
"At the risk of losing my…uhh…reputation or sounding cheesy…isn't us thinking the same thing a sign that this is meant to work? I know I said something similar earlier, but you can't deny that these things keep adding up." Sam's seriousness then expectedly transformed into his usual teasing.
"Face it, McNally, you're stuck with me."
Andy gave him a quick smile before turning somber. "I want to be, I really do, but I'm scared it won't work."
"We've made it this far, right? At least we're talking. I know you were the one that came to me, but I'm not afraid to admit that it probably wouldn't have been long before I caved and begged you take me back. I haven't gotten much sleep, and I've bitten everyone's head off that talks to me." Recognizing she wasn't likely to let that go, Sam beat her to the punch line. "Well, a lot more than usual," he smiled.
Andy couldn't hide her own smile at that point, appreciating that he still had the ability to read her mind.
"But more than that…I haven't been myself. Although I know I have a long way to go when it comes to opening up, you still know me better than anyone ever has. And I've been miserable without my partner."
"I have, too," she quietly answered. "But like you said before…how do we start?"
Sam knew it was risky, but he put his pride aside and pulled out the best card he could think of to pull.
"Well, for starters, I need to let some more walls down, so why don't we start with that?"
"By doing what?" Andy was thoroughly confused and tried to come up with a scenario while she watched him get back on his feet.
"Dance with me," he said, holding out his hand towards her.
"What?" she loudly stuttered out.
Sam smiled at her stutter, knowing he had caught her off guard.
"You heard me." The smile was plastered to his face.
"But…you've never…you…I uhh…I thought you were too cool to dance." Normally, she would have teased him about being too cool, but she was still reeling from his command.
"I was, but I figure it's time for a change." The double meaning did not go unnoticed by Andy.
"But why now? Why here?" Andy still couldn't get her head wrapped around the fact he was opening up himself to her this much, while putting aside his pride to do so.
"Because you said you always wanted to dance in the rain, and I was an idiot for not doing it with you that afternoon you asked me to. So I'm not missing the opportunity this time. I'm through with missing opportunities." Once again, his words conveyed much more than what was on the surface, and Andy clung to it.
Another moment had swept by, and she still hadn't answered him.
"C'mon, McNally, I need my partner."
With that request, she was powerless and slowly placed her hand in his. As he pulled her into a standing position, he moved them out from under the safety of the tree and into the rain.
He immediately drew her into him and enveloped his arms around her waist. Feeling oddly secure in his arms, despite the fears that still lingered, Andy wound her arms around his neck and let her head fall to his shoulder. But who was she kidding? She had always felt secure in Sam's arms.
A minute into the dance, Andy broke the silence. "We don't have music."
"We never needed it." The conviction in his voice melted her in a way that had nothing to do with the rain, and her arms tightened around him even more.
As the partners gracefully swayed in slow circles, their hearts began to beat in sync, and just like always, Sam and Andy found their rhythm again.
During one of their revolutions, Andy decided to take a chance, since she was certain Sam was apprehensive about how much he could push her right now. She raised her head from his shoulder and untangled one of her hands to carefully grip his cheek. Turning his face towards hers, she leaned in and delicately pressed her lips against his. It didn't take long for Sam's lips to respond. As the rain started to pick up in speed and intensity, so did their kiss. Whether it was subconsciously or not, their lips continued to match the rain, drop for drop.
The goosebumps on their skin were not even associated with the rainfall; they were purely a result of feeling them. While they were apart, both were numb. But now…not only could they feel again, but they could feel them again, and it was a sensation unlike anything else.
Though their senses were on high alert, the smell of the rain-covered atmosphere seemed to be bypassed. Their senses were overflowing and inhaling each other, refusing to acknowledge the outside world. All Sam could grasp was the beautiful invasion of Andy, filling him to the core. And all Andy could comprehend was the thrilling wonder of Sam, reaching out and touching her soul.
Regardless of the fact they could taste the rain, the only taste they registered was one another. It was a kiss that sealed the unspoken law of Sam and Andy – the intrinsic truth that neither of them would ever be able to get enough of each other and that their love would never fade.
Once they were finally forced to pull apart from the kiss, their foreheads melded together, as they tried to refill their breathless bodies with much-needed oxygen. While they breathed in as much air as they could, their hands carried on with their caresses. Andy's hands made their way tenderly up and down Sam's face at the same time his were soothingly rubbing her upper back.
It took some time, but soon after they gained a little more control over their breathing, Andy said the first thing that came to her. "Well, I guess that's definitely a way to start," Andy remarked in a breathy tone.
Sam's laugh continued the rejuvenation of Andy McNally that had been instigated under that tree - or rather, their tree. Apparently, there was a whole new meaning to those words now, and considering Sam Swarek just danced in the rain with her, she was pondering the idea of asking him once more, in the near future, about those carved names.
"You're something else, McNally." The realization that her rough and tough man was almost giggling, as he grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her, incited an eruption of giggles from her. "You love it."
Spurred on by the feeling of having his adorable and irresistible McNally back, Sam eased himself away from her lips to make the declaration he'd been itching to make again. "I do, and I love you, Andy." His admission was both soft and strong, just like him.
"I love you, too, Sam." She smiled and hauled him against her for another long kiss.
Although neither would deny they had a long way to go, one thing they weren't ready to admit just yet was the fact that, in that moment, both of them were thinking about a future tire swing hanging from that tree. A swing that would be donated to the park and be greatly used by them and a dimpled-face little boy pushing a bambi-eyed little girl.
After all, that's what the trees were about – providing a place of shade and solace when the world was too much, but then prompting life-changing revelations that only nature can provide. And years later, despite the constantly changing weather, seasons, and age of the tree, it would still be changing and growing, bringing about more revelations, as time and life passed by. In the hard and cold winter months, the leaves and branches would fall, but with protection from both nature and up above, it would bloom again, becoming even stronger with each ring, or mark, that branded it. And though some trees would eventually fall and cause damage, there would always be the special ones to survive it all and live to share their stories. What person could find inspiration from the fallen and destroyed trees? No, it's never been those trees. It will forever be the strong trees with stories of tire and rope swings, club houses, the privacy of special kisses, the carvings of names, the wide yellow solider ribbons, and more. It's that type of natural love that leaves a lasting impact – the kind that carves memories into the heart. The kind that the world couldn't stop. The kind that defined Sam and Andy.
