Whenever Eddy needed to think, he went to the junkyard. The view wasn't pretty, and the place smelled even worse than it looked, but there was something about it that kept his head clear. Nostalgia, he ventured. Lately, he'd spent many nights snoozing in the trunk of an old van he kept parked at the crest of the junkyard's tallest spire of scrap metal. The van had a nice, cushy waterbed built into the trunk, and a well-stocked fridge to boot. It was a good place to go when you needed some space. He settled into the driver's seat and cracked open a bottle of pop against a few screws poking through the shattered gearshift. Placing his legs against the steering wheel, Eddy rolled down the window with his empty hand and stared at the stars. A great, quivering mass of green and red bubbled menacingly against the skyline. It seemed to be getting closer by the day.
Eddy drained his pop in one labored swig. Not feeling particularly satisfied, he snapped open the glove compartment and fished around for some loose candy. He frowned. He had been so busy this week, he had forgotten to stock up. Now he was down to his last jawbreaker. He thought about digging in, but something held him back. Instead, he settled into the guts of his seat and nibbled on some crushed peppermints instead. They weren't very good. When peppermints sit for too long, they get awfully chalky. He closed his eyes and tried to dream of better sweets. Just before sleep overtook him, there was a knock at the passenger door. Eddy nudged the door open with his feet. He didn't open his eyes. He didn't need to.
"This seat taken?" A young man in a knit cap and knobby knees stepped inside and plopped into the passenger seat, not bothering to wait for his friend's reply.
"No, as a matter of fact, it ain't. I figured you'd be coming along pretty soon, so I unlocked the door for ya." Eddy felt something heavy fall into his lap. He opened his eyes and flared his nostrils. A big bag of candy was nestled in between his knees. He licked his lips, and took the bag in his hands. Then he frowned. "They out of jawbreakers?"
"Afraid so. More and more stuff is being rationed these days, and I was late to grab a ticket." His friend folded his arms into his lap and smiled. "But thanks to my connections within the brain trust, I was able to make off with some of these beauties."
Eddy raised a piece of candy to his nose and sniffed it. Sugar-free lemon drops hardly qualified as "beauties" in his book, but they were better than the peppermints he had been sucking on earlier. He shoved a handful down his throat and grumbled his thanks. He passed the rest to his friend, who took just one. He wedged the candy carefully between his teeth and bit down hard, crushing the lemon drop in one swift bite. The two boys sat in silence, chewing their candy and watching the stars. They drained the bag in minutes. The boy in the knit cap folded the bag into neat little squares and then tucked it underneath his seat. He turned to his friend. Eddy sucked on one last lemon drop, his eyes fixed against the glowing green blob staining their skyline. It made for one ugly moon.
"So...when's he goin' up?"
"The day after tomorrow. The brain trust agrees it is best if we get them all off planet before that thing gets any closer." Eddy's eyes narrowed, but they remained locked on target. His friend waited long enough for Eddy to collect his thoughts, and then continued. "If we launch the day after tomorrow, we can slingshot them all around that thing before it has a chance to grab them. The plan is to bury them at the very back of the Milky Way, somewhere they won't be found."
"You really think that's for the best, Double D? You make it sound like we're runnin away." The boy in the knit cap nodded slowly. He thought about telling Eddy he was the one who suggested the early launch, but decided to keep quiet.
"I do. He'll be safer that way. They all will." The way Eddy managed to cross both his arms and legs at the same time told him he didn't agree. Double D smiled gently and tried to coax some sympathy out of his friend. "He always wanted to be an astronaut, you know."
"He ain't an astronaut."
"I didn't say he was. I think what he's something way cooler than that." This made Eddy smile a little. At least they could agree on something.
"Where is he now?"
"In stasis, underground," Double D replied, pointing to the city lights reflected in the van's rear view mirror. "Dexter and his crew wanted to run some last minute tests, just to make sure when the time comes, all systems are go." Eddy's eyes flickered.
"So why ain't you there watchin' him?"
"I trust Dexter to behave himself," Double D answered calmly, folding his arms in a proud, know-it-all kind of way. "Besides, he knows better than to go tinkering with anything I've set my hands on."
Eddy shifted in his seat and massaged his headrest with clenched fists. He couldn't seem to get comfortable. Double D gave his shoulder a reassuring pat.
"You'll still have a chance to see him off, you know." Eddy perked up. His voice cracked with a cautious optimism unbecoming of his usual cocky disposition.
"That right? Cuz I heard rumors -
"Mandark fought to get them up today, but Numbuh Two and Utonium weren't having any of it. They've got a few close friends going up too, so there's no way they were going to let them go without saying farewell." This brightened Eddy's mood tremendously. He never liked Mandark. Then he tackled the elephant in the room.
"When they comin' back?"
Double D didn't answer. Eddy raked his fingernails against the steering wheel and tapped the brakes, bracing himself for an answer. A minute passed in silence.
"You don't know, do ya?"
Double D shook his head.
"That all depends on a lot of things, Eddy. And they're all things we don't know yet."
"Give me an estimate, then. I wanna know." Double D inhaled sharply and went to work crunching numbers on an invisible calculator only he could see. Eddy watched him work with unblinking eyes, as though he was trying to think the answer he wanted into existence. Double D lowered the last imaginary decimal point into place with his thumb and mulled over his figures. He knew if the brain trust found out he'd shared this info with a civilian, he'd land in a heap of trouble. But a part of him couldn't help but spill his guts. He didn't like keeping secrets, especially from his best friends. Deep down, he knew it was selfish, but for once in his life, he didn't care. He wanted to share his burden. He cleared his throat and tapped the windowsill, Eddy's signal to pay close attention.
"The satellites are rigged to return to Earth if seven years pass without contact with Dex Labs. We can call them back one at a time whenever we want, but we want them in space for at least a year after the moon makes landfall." Eddy looked very confused.
"I don't get why we even hafta send them into space in the first place. Why not just keep them here? Isn't that why you and the rest of the trust has worked your fingers to the bone? So we can protect ourselves when that thing does touch down?" Double D shrugged his shoulders and offered Eddy a humbling smile. He knew he wouldn't take it, but it was all he had.
"Things have gotten more complicated since we drew those blueprints."
"How complicated?" Eddy placed his knees on the dash and leaned in close. Double D could smell the lemon candy on his hot breath. "You better know I ain't gonna stop askin' questions till you tell me what I wanna know." Double D tapped the glass again. Eddy returned to his seat. Explaining their current situation in terms Eddy could understand would be tricky. Inside his brain, Double D paced back and forth.
"We have reason to believe the entities living on that planet are parasitic." Eddy raised his eyebrows. What an underwhelming answer.
"So what? They're like tapeworms or something?"
"Not tapeworms, exactly, no. Something much worse than that." While Double D was impressed Eddy knew what a parasite was, he still didn't feel like his friend was any closer to understanding the gravity of their situation. He stared at a few movie posters plastered against the back of the van through their reflections in the side-view mirrors. Then, the answer came to him.
"Remember how the robots in Robot Rebel Ranch used to be cowboys, but had their brains stolen by evil machines?" Eddy nodded enthusiastically.
"Well, we think the creatures living on that big green planet are capable of doing something similar. And not just with people. Machines too. So we don't want our trump cards lying around when the hostiles make landfall." Double D clapped his hands and pointed to his friend with all ten of his fingers. "Does that make sense?" Eddy nodded back to him, looking both enlightened and a little bit terrified. "We thought about just burying them real deep underground, but when we took a closer look at the moon, we realized that green goop has gobbled it up whole, right down it is core. So sticking them all in a bunker somewhere was a gamble." Double D's eyes drifted back towards the green mass. The clouds had cleared now, so it was easier to see now more than ever before. A faint, green light pulsed venomously from its center, casting out the starlight coloring the night sky. "We figure if they are out drifting in space, they'll be almost impossible for the enemy to track." Double D felt satisfied with his explanation, but Eddy seemed less convinced than ever any of this was a good idea.
"But what about food and water and stuff like that? And what about his family? Does Sarah know?"
"Each satellite has enough resources to sustain one person for a decade, so even if the satellites stay up longer than planned, we have a window of three extra years to retrieve them." Double D placed both hands on his friend's shoulders and squeezed tightly. "Ed's just going to take a long nap. And when he wakes up, he'll shoot back to Earth with his killer armor and state-of-the art weapons and demolish whatever monsters we haven't already sent packing." He flossed his fingers against Eddy's hairline and smiled. "We've had the support of all their families since the project started, so there are no problems there. They've been expecting this day to come for a long, long time now. It'll probably be a relief for most of them when their loved ones are finally off planet."
Eddy went quiet for almost half an hour after that. He had come to the junkyard to clear his thoughts, but it hadn't done him much good. Now, more than ever before, his brain was spilling over with things he didn't want to think about. Double D waited patiently for his friend to come to terms with the reality of their situation. Eventually, Eddy found his voice again.
"How long can I visit him tomorrow?"
"You can spend the whole day with him, if you like. I know that's what I'll be doing." Eddy raised his knees to his chest and gave himself a hug. He could feel his heart beating through his clothes. He licked his lips. He tasted salt-water.
"You know, those cheap lemon drops of yours left a pretty bad taste in my mouth, Sock-Head." Double D smiled at his friend apologetically.
"I'll be sure to get something better next time."
"You better. They tasted bunk." Double D reached into his pocket and then shoved his hands into Eddy's lap. His friend jumped out of his seat, hitting his flat head against the hood of the van.
"Wazzat for, Sock-Head?" Eddy grumbled, nursing a crop of knots swelling against the base of his neck. "And why you touchin me like that?" Double D pulled back his hands and rested his head on his chin. He was smiling.
"I don't know, Eddy. Maybe I just wanted to do something nice to make up for those lousy lemon-drops." Eddy glared at his friend and then his pants. A little silver box was sitting in his lap. He scooped it up and pressed it against his face. It was very cold and smelled like cologne. Eddy rolled the box between his hands and rapped his knuckles against it. He shot Double D an amused look.
"You seriously just give me flask?"
"Just open it up," Double D insisted, tapping his fingers against the windowsill. "Quickly, now. Before I change my mind."
Eddy did as he was told. A little glass cylinder stared back at him. It was wrapped in the same silver finish as the box, and was just as cold to the touch. Eddy weighed it in his palms. It didn't look especially valuable. Eddy's interest level was dropping fast.
"What is it?"
"It's a telescope," Double D said simply, taking Eddy's hands in his own and pointing the lens out the window. "I want you to look into it."
"Like this?"
"Yes, just like that. See that big cluster of stars up there?"
"The ones that look like a big shiny bucket?"
"That's the one. What do you think that is?"
Eddy paused and adjusted his grip.
"Geez, Sockhead, I dunno. What the heck is it supposed to be?"
"That's the big dipper."
Eddy stared at Double D like he had just turned wood into gold and then crammed the lens against his eye socket. He seemed quite enthralled now that he knew what he was looking at, but when he tore his eyes away to scratch his nose, it was obvious he didn't know why it was supposed to be important. Double D traced his fingers against the windshield and gave it one more hard tap.
"In order to track where our satellites go, we assigned each person a constellation. After Ed goes up, his satellite will be somewhere in that general direction, right under the Big Dipper." He heard the telescope drop to the floor and then Eddy scramble to pick it back up. "Whenever you want to check in on him, just look for those stars. He may not be able to wave back, but I'm sure if you look for him every night, he'll have sweet dreams."
Eddy cupped the telescope in trembling hands. He stared at it, and then his lips spread into a smile. His palms closed around the telescope tightly, and he hugged the device close to his beating heart. His seat was very wet now.
"Well, if 'ol Ed's got me lookin' after him every night…then I guess he'll have to try a little harder than normal to get himself killed up there." Inside the van, someone sniffled loudly. "So long as I can keep an eye on him...you got my permission to send him into space." The radio clicked on, and the sounds of classic rock flooded the van.
"I'm going to turn this up pretty loud. Is that okay with you, Eddy?" Eddy nodded slowly, burying his head in one hand. He placed the other around Double D's thin shoulders. Double D did the same, placing his own arms around Eddy's thick neck.
"He's coming, back. Eddy. Even if we got to go out there ourselves and drag him back, Ed's coming home someday." Eddy chuckled to himself, half laughing, half crying.
"He'd better. Cuz if he don't, I swear I'll kill ya."