This was inspired by all the funny pictures, sayings, and such I've been finding about Mudkip. The saying "Do you liek Mudkipz?" especially. I also wanted to do a story kind of like Buwaro's Tales of Flame, though I don't think that'll end up happening with this one.

All Pokemon that join Alice's team will be decided through using the Random Pokemon Generator found here (please take out spaces before putting in address bar):

wyncorporation pokemon/

I hope you enjoy the crazy things Destry gets Alice into. Plot ideas are welcome and, in the future, I may allow character submissions for future teammates. I still have to decide on that. Anyhow, enjoy the story!

Pokemon: Everyone Lieks Mudkipz!

Victim 1: Alice

Alice was your normal, everyday, average 10-year-old girl striving to become a Pokemon Master. She wanted to capture every Pokemon in existence. She wanted to defeat every opponent that came her way. She wanted to be the very best Pokemon trainer ever!

Today was the day she was finally going to get her first Pokemon. She couldn't wait to see what she'd get. She had her heart set on a Torchic. She wanted a Blaziken at the head of her team.

Alice had blue eyes and long, straight black hair that ended at her middle back. She was wearing a purple tank top, a faded blue jean jacket with the sleeves cut off and frayed at the edges, black pants, and black and purple tennis shoes. Two thin plastic bracelets, one black and one purple, were around her right wrist. Her lips had maroon lipstick on them and black eye shadow darkened her eyelids.

She had lived in Littleroot Town, Hoenn, for most of her life. Now she was finally leaving her boring hometown far behind. She had bigger and better places to visit now.

"Bye, sweetie! Be careful!" her cheerful mother called, waving from the door of her house.

"Bye, mom," Alice grumbled. Why is my mom always so positive? It's freaky…

She headed toward the Pokemon Lab, where she would finally get her starter Pokemon and leave Littleroot at long last. She smirked upon reaching the front door. Stepping inside, she felt on top of the world.

"Hey, Birch! I'm here for my starter!" she called.

The next thing she knew, a pair of hands grabbed the front of her jean jacket and yanked her into the lab. The door slammed shut behind her and the lights flickered on, revealing Prof. Birch. He looked terrified and desperate as he let go of Alice, scooping up a lone Poke Ball from the table behind him and shoving it into Alice's hands.

"Finally! I thought you'd never come! Hurry, take it and leave!" he pleaded quickly. "I can't stand being near it anymore!"

"Huh?" Alice stared down at the Poke Ball in her hands. What's his problem? Did he miss his morning coffee or something? "Let's get a good look at you, little guy."

"No!" Prof. Birch cried as she clicked the button, opening the red and white sphere.

Alice stood there with a smile on her face as white light erupted from the Poke Ball. Her smile quickly faded when the light materialized into a Pokemon. It wasn't the Torchic she had been dying to have.

"Why the fuck did you give me a fucking Mudkip?!" Alice demanded, glaring at Prof. Oak.

"You don't understand! It's not normal! You have to take it!" he desperately explained, looking on the verge of tears. "It's… It's…different! Just please, take it and leave! I can't even stand to look at it, let alone hear it! It never shuts up!"

"I wanted my Torchic, not a fucking Mudkip! Why the hell should I keep it?" Alice shouted.

"Just please, take it! I beg of you!" Prof. Birch cried. "You're my only hope! Please!"

"Don't tell me this is the only fucking starter left!" Alice complained, glaring down at the finned blue puppy in her arms. "Ugh… I knew I should've come earlier! Damn it!"

The Mudkip looked up at her, smiling widely. Then it opened its mouth and…

"Hi! I'm Destry! Do you like me?"

Alice froze, staring at the Mudkip. Then she screamed, nearly dropping it. "Oh my god! What the fuck? Why can it talk?!"

"I don't know! Just take it, I beg of you!" Prof. Birch begged. He shoved a PokeDex and five Poke Balls into her arms. "Here's all you need to start out! Now go, please!"

"Wait a sec! Why should I—"

"Thank you for helping me! Have fun on your journey! Bye!"

Prof. Birch then shoved her out the door and slammed it shut behind her. A loud click signaled the lab door was locked. Alice stood there for a few minutes, shocked and confused by what had just happened. Then she looked down at the Mudkip.

"What the hell just happened?" she muttered.

"He threw us out. He's weird. I asked him if he liked me and he screamed and got all twitchy. He kept screaming until you came. He liked me so much that he went insane!" The Mudkip giggled, smiling widely.

"Why the fuck can you talk?" Alice asked.

"I don't know. I'm Destry. Do you like me?" the Mudkip, Destry, asked cheerfully.

"Why do I think this journey is going to royally suck?" she wondered, depositing her PokeDex and Poke Balls into her bag. "Okay, Destry, time to go into your ball." As soon as I hit Oldale Town, I'm depositing this dude. I have to catch another Pokemon first, though.

"You do like me! You're just in denial. That's why you're trying to get rid of me. It's okay to say you like me. I know everyone does." Destry giggled.

"Personally, I can see why the professor was so desperate to get rid of you." Alice replied. "I can't wait to get rid of you, too. Bye-bye now!"

"Nope!" Destry giggled, dodging the beam of red light that shot from the Poke Ball.

"I said to get in the ball!" Alice tried again.

"Not happening! I don't like that ball! Nobody can like me if they can't see me." He dodged the beam again.

"I don't like you, period. Now get in the damn ball!" Alice shouted, trying again.

"Denial~!" Destry sang, dodging once more.

"Am not!"

"Are to!"

"Not!"

"To!"

"Get it the bloody ball, goddamn it!" Alice nearly screamed, chucking the Poke Ball angrily at the Mudkip.

Destry dodged again, watching the ball vanish into a bush on the edge of town. "Bye-bye, ball! I won't miss you!" he cried.

"Damn it!" Alice snatched up Destry and marched into Route 101. "You're so deposited once we hit Oldale Town!"

"Denial~!" Destry sang.

"Am not!" Alice yelled.

Alice's dream of conquering the Elite Four and the Champion with a super powered Blaziken was shattered that day. Instead, she got a talking Mudkip that was certain everyone in the world liked him. This would be the start of a very insane journey through Hoenn and maybe even beyond that. Would Alice and her future team survive Destry? The world may never know…