Okay...new story...it's a one-shot I know, but it took me a night to write down and a day to actually write it. Be happy you evil little sharks are getting a story!!!

Disclaimer: Don't own it blah blah blah

I reached over and turned down the music on my Ipod. I couldn't run away from reality this time. This time I had to face reality, and I didn't want to go through the pain of facing it. I guess you could say that I never got over Touya's death, that visiting the graveyard eight years past shouldn't bother me…but it did. I talked with a friend about it, he comforted me, gave me something to shoot for through the horrible nightmare in my life called 'leukemia.' I made it…but he did not.

As if I was back in that car crash that killed my brother instead of me, I remember what had happened. He was driving down the street, not speeding, not crawling slowly, just going a continual speed…and we were going under an intersection. I heard screeching tires, a horrible sliding noise…Touya had yelled at me to get down. I obeyed him without a second thought, and he covered my body with his. I had no idea what was going on, and the car jerked as something hit it hard. I heard breaking glass…and Touya's shallow breathing. I was still crouched down, too in shock to move.

"Hey, little monster," my brother's weak raspy voice came down to me and I struggled to look up at him. He had shards of glass stuck in his body everywhere and beads of bloods were slowly dripping onto the floor of the car. He smiled at me and reached his hand down, grasping mine. I looked up at him, confused. What was he doing, what was wrong?

"Yes, Touya?" My voice was shaking; I didn't know what was going on. I squeezed Touya's fingers, trying to find comfort in his rapidly fading body heat. I felt tears spring into my eyes, knowing that Touya was going to die here, sixteen…and hit by a car, a drunk driver probably. I would never forgive myself. I could have died instead of him.

"Don't blame yourself for this. If you tried to cover me…we'd both be dead because you are so small Sakura. You're only ten. Promise me that you won't forget me…but that you'll live your life…alright sis?" He was smiling the next time that I looked at him, and I smiled through my tears. "No more crying now. I'll always be with you, little monster."

"I hate it when you call me that." My voice was still shaking, I honestly didn't trust myself to talk, but these were the last few moments I had with my brother. I didn't want to spend it in silence…I wanted to remember it for later years. Touya managed a smile so I smiled back.

"Promise…me…" he struggled to get out, looking at me with pleading eyes. I knew death was at the door. Just as I started to say the words…I promise…his eyes closed and his body slumped. My brother was gone forever and I never got to say goodbye. I never even got to promise him his dying wish. I felt tears spring to my eyes and they fell down my cheeks in hopeless abandon.

I was not able to keep the promise I never made.

I did not think that the promise accounted for anything, because I never made it.

So my mental health deteriorated. I spaced myself away from my friends who had come to give me comfort, I would not go down to see them. I holed myself up in my room, just to get out of reality. After a while…I started going back to school. People had been happy to see me, but I avoided them like the plague. My old friends quickly gave up on me and I became a loner, an outcast. I should have died instead of Touya. People loved Touya…no one loved his little monster. I have sunk far from reality…I didn't want to deal with the pain.

I bent down to touch Touya's grave marker, made of bronze surrounded by forever shining granite, with my fingertips. I smiled a broken smile as the quiet surrounded me, as reality came back to me. I wanted to cry for him, tell him I was sorry…but I couldn't. Touya was dead. Life is for the living, my friend once told me. I clenched a piece of paper in my hand and I gasped out in pain. I had forgotten that I carried two long stemmed roses. The thorns still adorned their stems, and they hadn't finished blooming their deep blood red color.

I sighed and slowly relaxed my fist, looking at the pinpricks of blood now adorning my hand. It didn't really hurt now. There was the first little pain when something broke the skin…then there was nothing. I didn't feel it anymore…as my arms were already adorned in scars.

"H-hey Touya," I began in a shaking voice, thick with tears and choked with emotion. "I know that…this would…be the first…time I had…had ever visited you…after you…you died." I couldn't help it; tears ran down my face in bittersweet abandon as I talked to his grave. "I…have something to read…my friend gave it to me…and I thought that you…would like to hear…it."

My voice shaking, I began to recite:

"Love has no boundaries,
It can last forever,"

My voice became bolder, more sure as I continued,

"Yet death waits for no one,
It can tear anyone apart."

"My friend was right Touya. I still love you, it hurts me still. I know that you are dead, and that life is for the living, but I just can't help it. You left when I least thought you would, when you were having fun in your life. I guess I took that away from you, and I wish that I really hadn't. What that drunk driver did was the worst thing anyone could have done."

My voice was sure as I completed the last lines of the poem,

"Yet, think of what lays beyond,
Think of the beloved you will see once more
Death can't keep two apart,
They always come together in the end."

"My friend was right about that too. Touya, I will see you again, won't I? I will die, even if it wasn't when I was so sick. I will be back with you one day, won't I? Happy wherever heaven might be…I've got to go now, Touya, but I'll be back again, don't worry." As I stood up, crumpled piece of paper and other rose in hand, I felt a breeze. It was gentle and hesitant and it swirled around me in the softest manner. I swear that I could hear the faintest traces of voices among the many that carried the wind.

"Live your life, little monster." My eyes widened as the wind died down and I stood there in that spot for many moments. Then I realized. Even if I didn't complete the promise to him all those years ago, it was still a promise to his memory. It still meant something to the dead. The faintest of smiles came over my lips, the traces of happiness glowed in my eyes for a moment. Just because Touya was dead and I never really did complete the promise…he still valued it.

"I will," I whispered softly, turning away from his grave. I turned away and I walked away from where his remains were buried without looking back.

Now I was carefully walking along the rows of perfectly arranged graves, looking for the funeral procession. I walked quietly; it was a sad day, even if I did have the happy revelation. I was dressed in black, like the day that Touya was buried. I felt responsible for his death. But not now, not my friend's death…my best friend's death was not my fault, it was leukemia's, it was the nightmare that claimed my normal existence. I walked to the other people of his family and friends that were also clad in black.

"How is it going?" I questioned his best friend. I felt tears spring to my eyes again, why was I crying so much today? I shouldn't be crying…death is a happy time in other countries. I hastily wiped my tears and his friend, now my new friend, wrapped his arm around my shoulder, giving me comfort.

"The priest is just going to say a few words, and then we all leave. Would you like to stay for a while and tell him goodbye, Sakura?" I looked over at my friend and gratitude showed clear in my eyes. "I will wait for you; he was my best friend too, as well as my cousin you know." I managed a little smile at him and he smiled readily back at me.

"Thanks, I would like that a lot," I told him quietly. "Do you know why he died so early? I mean…he only had the cancer for two months at most. It's usually a longer procedure than that. I had it for six months without knowing, and I was too sick to get chemo. I had a bone marrow transfusion three days after they diagnosed me…"

"He also had AIDS. He couldn't fight off the cancer…he knew that it was a lost battle. He didn't go on chemo, because he knew that it would be harder to say goodbye that way, sick from all the toxins in his blood. Isn't that weird though? A man with AIDS manages to get leukemia too. They're exact opposites! AIDS attacks the white blood cells, but leukemia makes them go out of control. Weird deals in the medical world today." I nodded, he was right. We weren't even listening to the priest, who had closed his book and everyone was moving away now.

"Promise to stay, even if it takes longer than you want it to?" he nodded and squeezed my shoulders. He went and stood by his girlfriend, a girl who accepted my dead friend even with his sickness accepted me with mine. I carefully walked forward and laid a hand on the casket, tears sliding down my face. I stroked the dark shiny wood, the bunches of blossoms on top of it, and I breathed out a long sigh.

"You wanted to protect me, I understand, my friend. I'm glad that you were there through all of this, that you were always by my side, even if it was for only a few days. I was ready to give up when I got into that hospital, what reason did I have to live? I had ignored the warning signs, I had let it get horrible, no hope of returning. Did I want it? Yes…I did want the end of my life…but you changed that. I remember you as my friend in the same room as me, willing to talk and spend time with me.

"Who are you?" a boy with messy brown hair asked. He was sitting on a hospital bed on the other side of the room, staring at me. I looked back at him, and then I turned away again. The boy cautiously got up and walked to me, putting his hand over mine. "What's your name, I want to know."

"Sakura Kinomoto, that is my name." I had stated it simply; I didn't want to talk to this guy any more than necessary. He smiled at me again and brought my hand to his lips. I blinked at him, confused. Why was he being so nice? He wasn't dying of a deathly illness; he wasn't going to give up on life. I blinked slowly and looked at him. "Why did you do that?"

"Because you are the most beautiful girl that I have ever met," he told me. I blushed and looked away, embarrassed. No one had ever told me that before. No one had ever implicated that I was pretty in any way. He smiled and stood, towering over me. "I guess you're in for leukemia too, huh?" I looked at him, astonished. He WAS in the same predicament I was in. "I've had it for two months now. How about you?"

"Six months, I've had it. I ignored the warning signs." I looked up at him and I patted the bed beside me. He sat down next to me and smiled at me. "Even when some bruises didn't go away, I ignored it…I mark up easily. And then, I got a cold and it just wouldn't go away. So my dad brought me here. The cancer is already in my bone marrow, I need a transplant."

"Sakura, I think that you ignored the warning signs because there's something that made you want to give up, there's no reason to live anymore. Whatever that reason is…you just have to know…life is for the living. Don't waste the short time you have here on earth." The boy got up and moved back to his bed.

"Wait," I said quickly, as he had been closing his eyes for a nap. He popped open an eye and looked at me curiously. I tilted my head at him and asked my question. "You never told me your name. What is it?"

"My name? Sakura Kinomoto, my name is Syaoran Li."

I smiled at the memory of my first meeting with him. I got my transplant days later and I still went to the hospital to see him regularly. We became friends, he was my light in the dark world that I lived in. I remembered when he first kissed me; it was on the day that he was getting to go home for a couple of days. He asked me to visit him there.

"I'm going home for a while today." I smiled at him, saddened that I wouldn't really be able to see him. It was two weeks since I first met him. "I'm happy; my cousin is going to bring his girlfriend. I like her because she doesn't shy away from me like a lot of other people do. Her name's Tomoyo." I blinked, I remembered that name. She was a friend from long ago, a passing memory. "She says she knows you."

"As I know her as well."

"Sakura, promise me that you'll visit me, okay?" he handed me a piece of paper, curling my hand over it with his fingers. I held it tight and put it in my purse that was resting on his bedside table. I sat down on the bed beside him and he beckoned me with his arms. We always hugged, so this didn't seem weird at all. I welcomed myself into his warm embrace and he looked down at me. "Promise me Sakura."

"I-I p-promise Syoaran," he was looking at me so intensely; my words came out a bit shaken. He came towards me hesitantly, and I knew that he wanted to kiss me. He dragged me closer and advanced again. He placed his lips over mine in a soft kiss, a sweet kiss that made my heart jump and throb.

"Good, because I want to see more of you."

I smiled at the memory; it had been the sweetest kiss of my life. Of course, since I had promised him, I went to see him every day I could. This was pretty much every day, not counting Sunday because I was always doing something that day. Our relationship grew to extreme liking…and we got to…know…each other very well. I remembered the day, only one week ago, when Syaoran was so sick, he was dying…fast. His cousin, Eriol, called me at two in the morning because he didn't think that Syaoran would last much longer. I rushed over there as fast as I could, I wanted to spend the last moments of his life with him, I wanted to see my love once more.

"He keeps asking to see you," Eriol told me, leading me to his room. I walked in without another word and saw him lying on the bed in an in-home hospital room. He had told me a couple weeks ago, that if he was to die, then he wanted it to be at home.

"Hey," I started softly, knowing that he was awake. He slowly, ever so slowly, opened his eyes. He beckoned me closer with his arms and I walked into his hug. He moved over on the bed and pulled me weakly…I complied and lay down next to him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close to himself.

"Hey yourself," he said with a small smile. Then, he suddenly got serious. "I'm dying, Sakura, I won't be able to make it through the night, I know. I wanted to see you before I went to sleep, because I knew that I wouldn't wake up again." I nodded, tears starting to brim my eyes. "I love you. I have since I first saw you in the hospital, out cold from the medicine that they gave you. You talked to me and gave me something that I've always wanted: true love." By now I was crying and he tugged me closer, pushing my head into his shoulder.

"S-Syaoran…I-I love y-you too…" it didn't come out right because I was crying so hard, but I knew he heard it. He tilted my chin up and kissed me once, twice. He looked over at the bedside table and reached behind me, grabbing something. I heard the crinkle of paper and soon, he was holding something in front of me.

"Here's a poem that I wrote for you. Don't read it until I'm gone. And here," he held out a cream-colored box. "This is for you. I know we can never get married, but I want you to know, that if I could have, it would have been you." I started to open my mouth but he shushed me. He opened the box and slipped a beautiful diamond ring on my finger. I looked up at him as he kept speaking. "Fall in love again, get married. I'll be waiting for you on the other side. Promise me, Sakura, promise me."

Tears streaming down my face, I nodded. "I promise you, Syaoran…" he smiled and kissed every one of my tears away, ending on kissing my lips. This was as sweet as the first kiss he ever gave me, and I felt my heart break in two, and my world explode into pain.

"I love you, Sakura Kinomoto, goodbye." He smiled at me again and rested his head back on the pillow. I got off his bed and sat in the chair beside it.

"I love you as well, Syaoran Li, and goodbye doesn't mean forever." I saw him smile again and nod, agreeing. Then he closed his eyes and I watched him sleep. I watched him sleep until the last breath left his body. I could hear his voice in my head, telling me not to cry, he'd see me again. I watched as Eriol came in and a saddened look crossed his face. He looked at me and went to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"He loved you, you know." I nodded, telling him I knew. He got up and walked out of the room, going to call Tomoyo. I looked down at the piece of paper in my hand and I slowly opened it to read.

'To my dearest love—
Love has no boundaries
It can last forever,
Yet death waits for no one…
It can tear anyone apart.

Yet, think of what lays beyond,
Think of the beloved you will see once more
Death can't keep two apart,
They always come together in the end"

I turned back to Eriol and Tomoyo, ready to go. Eriol smiled and they both put their arms around me. "Oh, this is for you, it's from Syoaran." I nodded as he handed me a crumpled envelope.

I waited until I got home to read the letter and I smiled as I deciphered his messy scrawl.

To my love—

If you are reading this, it means that I am dead, yes. It means that you've figured out how I died so quickly. I was protecting you from the truth my love. What if you knew? Would you still have loved me, would you still have been my girl for those glorious two weeks? I knew that I never had much time, Sakura. I was ready to die when you came into that hospital. You were the most beautiful thing that I ever did see, and I did love you right from the start. How could someone not have loved you? You're sweet and gorgeous…and just one of a kind. I loved that I could have spent that time with you. I held on that long for you. You awakened in me something that I had never felt before and I liked it…so I kept myself near you. Live your life Sakura. Find a new love, get married, have children. Don't let the dead hold you down. I once told you that life is for the living, and I still stand by that. Live your life until it's your time to die. I will be waiting for you on the other side.

Love—

Syaoran

Tears came to my eyes as I held the letter close. I found a photograph of us with the letter and I smiled. I had taken him to the fair and he had enjoyed himself with me. I couldn't believe that he kept it. I put the letter away in a safe box and I framed the picture. I would always be reminded of my first love. I heard the telephone ring and I picked it up.

"Hello Sakura, this is your nurse speaking." I listened carefully, not really knowing what to expect. "You're pregnant. You don't have any viruses in your blood stream. Not a one Std. I would like you to come to the hospital within the next week."

"O-okay," I was stunned. My nurse hung up and I dropped the phone. I was…pregnant?

Yay for twists at the end!!! Woo~! At least she didn't get AIDS .

Inspired by my gay friend...=(
Review story sharks!!