The room looked the same as when Elsa had left it four days ago. Her bed was still neat, as if she had made it mere moments previous. Her dressing gown was neatly folded at the foot of her bed. She remembered wearing it and pacing the room back and forth for hours before the coronation, sick with worry.
Nothing has changed.
Then she happened to glance at her mirror, standing in the corner, and she caught her breath. She had caught distorted glimpses of her reflection in her ice creations, but she had not yet taken in her full appearance.
The moonlight flooding through the window made the spectacle all the more surreal. She seemed to glow as it fell on her hair and skin. The ice crystals on her bodice glittered gently. In her mind she saw a snowflake, delicate and fantastic.
Elsa was so unused to seeing this version of herself that she stood frozen in awe.
And yet everything has changed.
She stepped out of her shoes and gently undid her braid. White waves of her hair came cascading down her back. It felt good. Softly, she dressed for bed, leaving her ice dress abandoned on the floor.
The room was eerie and empty, and shadows seemed to reach out from the dark corners.
I never thought I'd be back here.
She did not like it. There were too many horrors hidden away in this room, too many memories of past fears.
Anna.
She needed Anna right now.
She walked to the door, determined to walk down the hall to her sister's bedroom. She opened the door to find Anna standing right outside, also dressed in her nightdress, hair lose. Her hand was raised, ready to knock the door Elsa just opened.
The two sisters gave identical starts of surprise. Then, giggling, Anna reached out and hugged her. Elsa smiled and enfolding her little sister in her arms.
Oh, I've missed this.
"Elsa?"
"Mmm?" She stroked Anna's hair.
"Can I stay with you tonight?"
Her eyes were wide and almost scared. As if she was still worried that Elsa would disappear behind closed. The look broke Elsa's heart.
I promise you, little sister, I will never go away again.
"Of course," she glanced back at her bedroom door, "but let's not go back in there."
She reached out and grabbed the door handle hesitantly. Then she gently and quietly shut the door. The soft click seemed to echo through the halls with solid finality. Elsa took Anna's hand and smiled.
The door's closed. And I'm finally on the right side of it.
Unable to contain her joy, a giggle escaped her and she half tiptoed, half ran down the hall, pulling Anna along with her.
"Elsa!" Anna shrieked with mirth, "Shh! You'll wake everyone up!"
"C'mon, c'mon!"
It was as if they were little girls again, racing down the hallways in slippered feet and giggling at the naughtiness of it all; playing through the castle when they were supposed to be sound asleep.
"Where are we going?" Anna asked as they sprinted past her bedroom, the main stairway and their father's study. Elsa pulled Anna around the corner and they stopped short. The doorway was closed and the moon fell on the door handle. Anna shivered next to her as Elsa's hands shook. Neither sister had been down this hallway in three years.
"Mama and Papa's room?" Anna whispered, her breath unsteady.
Elsa squeezed her sister's hand tighter and felt her inch closer. Taking deep steadying breaths, the girls approached the door, treading silently on the carpet. As Elsa reached out to touch the door, it seemed to open of its own accord. She blinked in surprise. Then she shook her head.
Just a trick of the light.
They stepped into the room.
The first thing that hit her was the smell. It was covered heavily by dust, but the smell of her parents was still there. Her father, pine and sea breeze, and her mother, wild flowers and summer rain. Elsa felt her knees go weak. It was all too much.
She sunk to the floor and buried her face in her hands. Through her fingers she could see her parent's bed, the window balcony, the wardrobe, the fireplace… it went on. Elsa began to cry. She missed her family more than ever now. Her family had been torn apart by her powers, and there was no getting it back.
She felt Anna crouch down and hold her. Elsa tok big, gulping breaths, trying to control herself. She could feel the snowflakes she had accidentally conjured fall to the ground and fade. As she allowed Anna's embrace and warmth to comfort her, she heard her sister whisper, "I've got you, Elsa."
At least I have Anna back.
Anna grabbed Elsa's hand and pulled her to her feet. Together they padded over to the large bed in the middle of the room, turned down the covers and crawled under the sheets. The two sisters held each other for a long time, not daring to speak. I'm sorry, Elsa wanted to say, I'm sorry for everything I've put you through for so many years, especially over the last few days. I'm sorry.
Anna seemed to understand her silence. "It's okay," she yawned, "it's okay". She snuggled closer to Elsa and her breathing slowed gradually until she had obviously nodded off.
Elsa smiled down at her little sister. She still snored like she did when they were little. What else had remained the same about her? Was Anna's favorite color still purple? y? Did she still hate peas? And what about bike riding?
I hardly know you anymore.
The smile slipped off her face. She had a long way to go to catch up with Anna again. And it would take a long time before Anna could trust her completely.
"We were so close. We can be like that again," she had said.
But how long would that take?
Elsa suddenly felt a warmth surround her. A soft breeze came from nowhere and played across her face. It was accompanied by a soft, whispered voice, and whether it was spoken out loud or just in her head, she didn't know.
"You'll be fine, Elsa."
She started. How?
"Papa?" she breathed in wonder.
The breeze whistled and tickled her ear. It smelt like pine and sea. It was soon joined by a twin breeze, this one smelled like wild flowers.
"Mama?"
"You'll be fine, Elsa. You'll be fine, dear," the breeze seemed to whisper over and over.
Elsa smiled as a warmth flooded her heart. Her parents were here. She knew it. Her family was here, all of it. She smiled down at Anna. They'd never be separate again. Her family would always be together.
She closed her eyes and slid further under the blankets. She allowed her breathing to slow and match her sister's.
I'll be fine. I'll be just fine.