Master Quatre and the Gundam Wing Barbies

Master Quatre and the Gundam Wing Barbies

By Ariela Dawn

"Hey girls! Check this out! A new line of Barbies!" a corny commercial voice said.

"Wow!" Girl A said, she held up the Barbie, "What kind of Barbie is this?"

"IT'S A GUNDAM WING BARBIE STUPID! CHEESE AND RICE!" the voice yelled

"What the fuck is Wundam Ging?" Girl B asked.

"ITS GUNDAM WING! GET THE DAMN TITLE RIGHT! YOU'RE FIRED!" the voice yelled again.

"Fine, you asshole," Girl B said and threw the Barbie at the camera and left the set.

"DON'T CALL ME AN ASSHOLE YOU LITTLE BITCH! Look, this is a fifty-dollar commercial and we're nine million over budget! And I don't want to take another take! Introduce the damn Barbies and go home!" the voice yelled at girls A and C, who flipped the camera off.

"Quatre!" Girl C threw the Quatre Barbie at the camera.

"Trowa!" Girl A smacked Girl C with the Trowa Ken.

"Duo!" Girl C bitch-slapped Girl A with Duo Teresa

"Relena!" Girl A ripped off Relena Stacie's head and threw it at Girl C.

"Wufei!" Girl C dropkicked Wufei Christie.

"Heero!" Girl A shot Heero Tommy from a slingshot at Girl C's head.

"Ok! Cut and print!" the director shouted.

At Quatre's (PINK) Hawaiian Home

Quatre is busy watching television when:

"Hey girls! Check this out! A new line of Barbies!"

Quatre watched the whole commercial squealing the whole time. He ran into the kitchen where Rashid was making pink cookies in a frilly apron.

"Rashid! Guess what?" Quatre was bubbling over with excitement.

"They finally killed off Relena?" Rashid asked, scraping the charred remains off the cookie sheet.

"NO! GUNDAM WING BARBIES! TAKE ME TO THE TOY STORE NOW NOW NOW!"

"All right, calm down, calm down, Master Quatre, don't make me sick Wufei on you."

"Ok, can we go now? Please? Oh pretty please?" Quatre was on his knees, tugging on Rashid's frilly apron.

"Well, since that was my last batch, we can go." Rashid gave in and he went to the pink Cadillac behind Quatre.

"YAY!" Quatre shouted out the window when they drove up to Crappy Toy's 4 U, Lotsa Money 4 Us. Some women with their little boys covered their eyes and tried not to stare at Quatre in his pink shirt.

"HI TROWA!" Quatre shouted when he saw Trowa stumble out of the store, his arms full of pink doll boxes. Quatre leaped out of the car window like a dog and glomped Trowa, making him fall over and drop all his boxes.

"Whaaahhh! Quatre! What the hell are you doing here?" Trowa screamed, trying to shove his koi1 off his stomach.

"Getting toys!" Quatre licked Trowa's face, "What did you get?" Quatre asked excitedly looking at the scattered pink boxes.

"Um, I got cookies…yeah that's it… cookies…" Trowa sputtered.

"Master Quatre! Come!" Rashid called to Quatre like a dog from the door of the toy store.

"Bye Trowa! Later, we'll hook up huh?" Quatre said bounding to the entrance.

"Yeah, whatever, later Quatre…." Trowa said, picking up all the pink "cookie" boxes.

Rashid and Quatre walked in the store and saw Duo in an ugly green vest flirting with a girl, who was giggling madly. Wufei stood nearby, steam coming out of his ears and very red.

"Here," the girl said and stole a pen out of Duo's vest pocket. She wrote something on Duo's palm and stuck the pen back into Duo's vest pocket.

"Call me," the girl said, taking her items and leaving.

"Bye-bye…pretty girl…" Duo waved, love-struck.

"Maxwell!" Wufei yelled, still waiting in line.

"Eh?" Duo looked away from the swaying hips of the girl just long enough to see one pissed-off Wufei, holding several boxes, all of them, pink. "Oh, hey Wufei! How's it goin'?"

"What do you think? I've been waiting in line for forty-five minutes!" Wufei shouted.

"Sorry…but pretty girls get me…" Duo scoffed, then looked at the number that the girl wrote on his palm. Duo looked at Wufei again and began to run the pink boxes through the scanner. Then realizing what Wufei was purchasing, Duo asked: "What's with all the Barbies, Woofy?"

Wufei stood straight, sweatdropping, "They're uh, um for my niece…she's having a birthday next week and I thought I should get her a doll…"

"Twelve Wufei dolls? Come on." Duo scoffed.

"I have twelve nieces! And they all want dolls of me!" Wufei shouted, trying to prove his innocence.

"Whatever, that'll be two-hundred four dollars and ninety cents."

"CHEESE AND RICE! The total can't be that much can it?" Wufei yelled outraged.

"Well it is, twelve Wufei dolls at seventeen dollars each comes to two-hundred four dollars, plus ninety cents for tax, now pay up." Duo said, grinning widely.

Wufei dug into his pocket for his wallet and fished out a pair of hundreds, and a five. Duo rung up the total and gave Wufei his dime. Duo sacked the dolls and gave them to Wufei. As Wufei was heading toward the door, Duo yelled:

"Thank you for shopping at Crappy Toys 4 U, Lotsa Money 4 Us, have a nice day!"

Wufei flipped Duo off and fell over from the imbalance of the weight of the dolls.

"Duo!" Quatre cried happily and glomped him too.

"Ahhh! Get off me Q!"  Duo cried, shoving his friend off of him. When Quatre got off, Duo sat up. "Let me guess," Duo put his fingers to his temples mocking a psychic, "You came here to buy as many Gundam Wing Barbies as you possibly can too?"

"How'd you know?" Quatre asked.

"You just told me, and Wufei and Trowa just came in and bought some themselves, of themselves. Trowa also bought one of you too, Q."

"Really!? Trowa said those were cookies! Trying to surprise me…" Quatre went all bubbly and shoujo style, pulling out a compact mirror and primping his hair.

"Just go get the dolls you want." Duo said, getting really impatient (Well, if you were Duo and lived with Hilde, you'd go after any pretty girl that gave you her phone number immediately too!)

"YAY!" Quatre squealed and ran to the doll aisle.

Duo looked to Rashid, who winked flirtatiously at him. Duo turned away and began to sweat profusely. Quatre quickly returned with the whole sha-bang; all the GW dolls, clothes, a house, car, pool and golf course (I didn't even know that they made golf courses!)

Duo scanned all the items that Quatre brought up to the check out and rang up the total. "It comes to two-hundred and forty dollars," Duo said, then got close to Quatre, "But since you're nice to me, unlike Wufei, I'll give it to you for one-ninety, and I'll throw in this shiny key-chain as an added bonus!"

"Sold! Quatre said and paid Duo two hundred fifty dollars. Duo rang it all up and began to give Quatre the change, when Quatre said:

"Keep the change, use it on dinner with that girl."     

"All right, whatever you say Q." Duo responded and went in the employee room and clocked out.

Later that night…

"Trowa…come here," Quatre Barbie said.

"What is it my darling?" Trowa Ken asked.

"Kiss me…" Quatre Barbie said.

"EW! GROSS!" Relena Stacie shouted.

"Yucky!" Heero Tommy chimed in.

"Eeesh, I'm playing golf now, care to join me anyone?" Duo Teresa asked.

"I'll go, anything to get away from those two." Relena Stacie said, grabbing Heero Tommy by the ankles.

"NOOOOOOO!" Heero Tommy screamed.

"I'll grab Wufei," Duo Teresa said and picked up Wufei Christie.

"Put me down you weak-assed asshole bitch!" Wufei Christie demanded.

"Awwww, Wufei called me a weak-assed asshole bitch! How cute!" Duo Teresa said.

"Heero threatened to kill me the other day!" Relena Stacie said, "They're both growing up so fast!"

"OOOO, I just LOVE these things, don't you Trowa?" Quatre squealed, "What happens now?"

"You'll see," Trowa said, "Now, let's concentrate on Quatre Barbie and Trowa Ken…" (Author -_-; )

"Hee hee hee, I'll get you now Heero," Relena giggled from atop a high desert cliff. She was dangling a gun that her name on it from a fishing rod over a road between two canyon walls.

Heero was speeding along the road when he saw the gun dangling in mid air and grabbed it. Relena felt the assassin pull on the gun and reeled it in, pulling Heero up. When Heero got to the top, he saw Relena and fired the gun. Then with the twitch of his tongue, he sped off Road Runner style.

At Wufei's house…

"WE ARE THE WUFEI SQUAD!" the dozen Wufei Christies yelled and saluted to Wufei.

"SUGOI!" Wufei shouted and squealed in a high pitch.

"We are the Wufei squad! We worship you Wufei! You are much better than Duo-the-devil-worshipping-dirty-smelling-little-girl-imp! Wufei rules! Duo sucks! Wufei rules! Duo sucks! Wufei rules! Duo sucks! Wufei rules! Duo sucks! YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"Now attack!" Wufei commanded to his followers, pointing to a scandalously dressed Duo puppet, hanging from a post. The Wufei squad did nothing.

"ATTACK!" Still nothing.

"DAMMIT WHEN I SAY ATTACK YOU ATTACK! DON'T MAKE ME MELT EVERY ONE OF YOUR HEADS!"

Nothing.

Wufei was really pissed off now and he scooped every one of the dolls up and went into the kitchen. He got out a plate and threw the dolls on it. He slammed open the microwave door and set the timer to 3 hours, to make sure they melt all the way.

"Well, now you know it's not fun to mess with Woofy…er, Wufei." Wufei declared watching the dolls melt into a big pile of yuck.

Meanwhile at Dorothy's Apartment…

Dorothy is busy idolizing herself in the mirror with the TV on when she heard the all too familiar commercial voice…

"IT'S A GUNDAM WING BARBIE STUPID! CHEESE AND RICE!"

Dorothy turned to the TV and watched the commercial. When it was done, Dorothy was mad.

"What?! How dare they make a doll of Relena and not me! I am appalled and furthermore PISSED OFF! I am going down to the toy company and complain!" Dorothy went up to her room and got in a very ugly outfit courtesy of Relena's school and went downstairs.

Dorothy got in her god-awful car and drove to Crap-tell Toys, Int.

Relena stood near the road on which Heero was speeding along. Hearing the infamous "Omae o korosu," that Heero would say, she plopped her ass on a huge bottle rocket bundle and lit a match. Heero sped past, putting out the match with his wake of fast moving air. Relena lit another match and lit the fuses of every bottle rocket slowly.

What happened next? Well, let's say that Relena now has a personal grudge on fireworks, bottle rockets in particular, because, they all went up her dress and exploded.

Heero sped by again and stopped. He laughed at Relena and with the twitch of his tongue, sped off again, making the road separate from the ground like the Roadrunner.

Dorothy stopped at an intersection, where she saw a bum who looked very familiar. The bum cleaned off her windshield and asked Dorothy for some dough. Dorothy looked at the bum and asked: "Zechs?"

The bum then stared at her and then finally recognized Dorothy.

"What are you doing?"

"Noin kicked me out…"

"Aw, po baby…you want a lift?"

The light turned green and Zechs got in.

Some random driver guy yelled, "'ey, lady! Why'd ya pick up that bum?"

"That bum is Zechs Merquise! Now get outta 'ere!" Dorothy yelled at the guy and sped off.

"So, Dorothy, where we going?" Zechs asked pressing a button on the dashboard, making fumes spew in the back seat. "What's that?"

"Chloroform gas, I used it once on Relena." Dorothy grinned evilly. "We are on our way to Crap-tell Toys, I have a complaint."

"Um, isn't that at least a week by car to get there from here?" Zechs asked.

"Oh yeah…" Dorothy said and did a cookie and headed back to her apartment.

"Whaaa! Are you crazy?" Zechs yelled, while Dorothy did the cookie, clinging to the dash.

"No, my nose is sensitive. When did you last have a shower?" Dorothy snapped.

"Um, uh, three weeks ago?" Zechs was questioning himself.

"Cheese and rice! When we get to my place, take a friggin shower!"

The same time, only at Duo's home…

"Sexy mofo coming through!" Duo declared, all slicked up for his date.

"Sexy mofo?" Hilde raised an eyebrow, she was watching Korean soap operas.

"How can you understand that shit?" Duo asked, checking his threads in the mirror.

"How can you not date me?" Hilde asked.

"Easy, you're not beautiful!" Duo said and the doorbell rang. Duo bounded to the door and opened it.

"Are you Hilde Schbeiker?" a stripper asked.

"No…Hilde! Did you order a stripper?" Duo asked very embarrassed.

"Yes! NOW GO AWAY! Franz and I have business to attend to!" Hilde got up, ice cream dripping off the corner of her mouth and shoved Duo out the door.

"Jeez, what a bitch…" Duo muttered.

The girl who gave Duo her number pulled up on the street in a red Mustang GT and honked the horn, which played "La Cucaracha". Duo looked to the girl and went up to the car.

"Hey, you're Trinity, right?" Duo asked

"Yeah, hop in." Trinity said and sped off when Duo was fully seated.

"What are we doing?" Duo yelled over the sound of the racing wind.

"DINNER AND A SHOW!" Trinity yelled, forcing the car to a stop. Trinity hit a button on the dash and the roof popped up and over the pair. "You do like Italian cuisine right?"

"Like it? I love it!"

"Who was that guy that went into your place?"

"A stripper."

"Nani?"

"My roomy hired a stripper. I guess I'm too good for her."

"Good enough for me…"

"I heard that you're a stripper."

"What?!" Trinity gasped.

"I thought I saw you at a strip club once, and I put a twenty in your G-string."

"That ridiculous! You must've been high or drunk to think that."

"Yeah, I was when I think about it." Duo pondered, "By the way, what are we seeing?"

"The Rocky Horror Picture Show…"

Duo's eyes bugged out when she said this.

"You have something wrong with a classic like that?"

"I just didn't think you were that kind of girl." Duo confessed.

"Well, I am. Beauty, brains, talent and a little kink for good measure." ^_^

"Wow, Trowa that was great." Quatre said, laying back.

"I told you, I was good." Trowa smirked.

"Where did you learn how to do that?"

"Rashid." Trowa said calmly.

"What? I'm sure that Wufei would've teach you that." Quatre said.

"Well, soufflés are easy to make." Trowa said. (Bet'cha you weren't expecting that were ya?)

"Let's see what's on the tube…" Quatre said, clicking on the TV. Quatre was flipping through the channels, saying "Crap" at each.

"Whoa! What was that?" Trowa shouted, seizing the remote from his koi's hands, he clicked back a channel, which was airing the new Gundam Wing Barbie Commercial.

"Hey! Look! It's a new line of Gundam Wing Barbies!" the corny voice declared.

"Ooooo, ahhhhh," said Girls D, E and F.

"I got Hilde the Ugly-Assed German Shepard!" Girl F said proudly.

"Eeeeeewwww, Hilde?" Girls D and E asked in disgust.

"I like dogs…so sue me." (Author's Note: I have nothing against German Shepards, but I do have something against Hilde, have a nice day!)

"Better yet, you're fired!" the director yelled. Girl F left the view of the camera and kicked a stagehand in his gonads. 

"Continue on!" the director called.

"Um, sir, we're still rolling." Cameraman 1 said.

"Who gives a flying fuck?" the director asked.

"Can fuck fly?" Girl D asked curiously.

"YES IT CAN!" the director yelled.

"Cool." Girl E said.

"Will you finish your damn lines now?" the director yelled.

"Fine, this is Dorothy, the four-eye browed bitch who hates Relena with a passion and was cut out of the Endless Waltz Toonami showing!" Girl D yelled, holding up a Dorothy Skipper doll.

"This is Zech Merquise, what a dream!" Girl E held up a Zechs Kelly doll, complete with tiny helmet.

"Ok…what the hell was that?" Trowa asked holding the remote in utter shock.

"My god, they've made a Dorothy doll…" Quatre said in total shock too.

Trinity and Duo pull up to that Italian restaurant that they were going to. They get out of the car and walk in and are seated.

A waiter begins to take their order and looks at Trinity.

"Ah, bellisima, what is your request tonight?" the waiter kissed her hand. Duo scowled.

"Chicken cacciatore and a garden salad with a wine cooler." Trinity said.

"And for you?" the waiter asked sharply at Duo.

"The Special." Duo said plainly and the waiter snatched the menu from Duo's grasp.

"Hey, Joe! Bellisima is here!" the waiter yelled

"Bellisima? Ah, bellisima!" Joe called from the other side of the room.

"Yah, and she brought a friend!" the waiter called.

"Just go get our food," Duo snapped and the waiter left for the kitchen.

"Why are you being so rude?" Trinity asked, sipping on the table water.

"They're hitting on you…" Duo pouted.

"It's their culture, Italian people are very hospitable."

"Ah, bellisima, good to see you again!" Joe walked up shirtless, Duo fell over.

"Hello, Joe," Trinity said.

"You order cacciatore? It coming soon, is very good tonight, like you are." Joe said.

"Stop it Joe, I'm too young for that kind of talk." Trinity giggled, this made Duo more jealous.

"Ey, boys! La Bellisima is here tonight! Marco, Roberto, Leonardo!" Joe called.

Marco the waiter walked up, in a black thong, with the salad; Duo smacked himself in the forehead.

"Your salad bellisima," Marco said as he set the salad on the table and swung his hips like a stripper.

"Dinner and a show…" Duo muttered.

"Thank you Marco. How's your mama doing tonight?" Trinity said.

"She doin' all right, right mama?" Marco called to the kitchen.

"Right." A big fat burly guy roared from the kitchen.

Marco left and Leonardo and Roberto came to the table, and hopped on Trinity and began to neck her.

"Oh, that's it!" Duo shouted and pulled Trinity away from the two men. Duo marched out of the restaurant.

"What the hell are you thinking, Duo?! Don't you like Italian people or something?" Trinity demanded.

"Not anymore." Duo said. "The way they were treating you was…was…ah hell, they were perverts!"

"No they weren't, it's their culture. You insulted them by doing that…" Trinity insisted.

"Look, you want to stop at Burger Buxx and get some real food?" Duo asked.

"Well, I'm hungry. Let's go." Trinity sighed and they walked down the street to Burger Buxx.

"Aw, bellisima! Come back!" the waiter, Marco, Joe, Roberto and Leonardo were at the restaurant window, licking the glass and holding themselves, begging for Trinity to come back inside.

Relena grinned evilly as she devised the perfect way to get Heero.  On top of two close cliffs, she had placed a huge boulder on a peg; and when Heero was 3.226 seconds away from the boulder, she'd let it fall and he'd be trapped beneath.

"I'm brilliant!" Relena declared to herself, "Now Heero will be mine forever!"

"Omae o korosu." Heero said, signifying that he was drawing close.

Relena hid away from the road and counted. "One, two, three!" She yanked the rope that would release the peg from beneath the boulder. The boulder didn't budge and Heero zipped underneath unharmed.

"What the hell?" Relena asked and yanked on the rope again. It still didn't fall. Relena climbed to the top of a cliff and began to jump furiously on the boulder. It still wouldn't budge. Relena climbed down again and went beneath the boulder. She dropped the rope and examined the bottom of the boulder from the ground. Heero zipped up, and grabbed the rope.

"Omae o korosu." Heero quipped and yanked the rope and successfully made the boulder fall with a whistle and an earth-shattering crunch when it hit the ground and Relena.

"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Quatre screamed, and ran downstairs holding his pile of GW dolls.

"What happened Master Quatre?" Rashid asked.

"MY DOLLS HAVE BEEN BEHEADED!" Quatre shrieked and fell to his knees crying.

Quatre's shrieks were very high pitched and were heard throughout the world.

"MMM, morning Quatre." Trowa yawned happily, grinning.

"HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALM?!" Quatre screeched in Trowa's ear.

"Because, I had fun last night." Trowa replied simply.

"DID YOU DO THIS TO MY DOLLS?!"

"Maybe," Trowa teased.

"YOU DID THIS WHILE I WAS SLEEPING!" Quatre hurled Trowa Ken's head at Trowa, hitting him in the forehead.

"I HAD MY REASONS!" Trowa yelled and left, slamming the front door behind him.

"Well, Master Quatre, shall we go back to the store and buy some more for you?" Rashid asked, jingling the car keys.

"No, I have my own doll to catch." Quatre said and chased after Trowa.

A slow motion sequence shows Trowa walking down the sidewalk with Quatre running behind him, trying to catch up with Trowa. Trowa pauses at a busy intersection and waits for traffic to clear up.

"TROOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Quatre cried in slow motion.

Duo and Trinity speed by in Trinity's Mustang GT honking the horn, Duo screaming "HEY YOU TWO GET A ROOM!" at some people on the sidewalk, then Heero zoomed by, quickly followed by Relena on rocket-powered rollerblades and Wufei on a little minibike screaming "THAT IS WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH WOOFY… AHHHH WUFEI!"

Quatre meanwhile, catches up with Trowa and glomps him to the ground. Dorothy and Zechs roll past, and Zechs reaches out and grabs the two and throws them in the back seat.

"Wha—hey! Do you mind?!" Quatre gasped in shock.

"We need you two for balance!" Dorothy screamed, putting the petal to the metal, chasing Wufei.

"Damn you, Relena! You ran over my pile of melted mes!" Wufei screamed.

"HEERO, GIVE UP! YOU'LL NEVER ESCAPE ME!" Relena screamed after Heero.

"HELP ME! DUO!" Heero yelled, trying to catch up with Trinity and Duo.

"ITS LIKE A FUCKIN CIRCUS PARADE!" Trinity screamed speeding up, and busting through a guard rail to plummet the car over a HUGE cliff into the ocean.

"I say we got a twenty minute fall to the bottom, wanna do it?" Duo said.

"Beats twenty minutes of screaming." Trinity said ripping off her shirt and attacking Duo with passion.

Heero zoomed off the cliff, and began to fall, closely followed by Relena, Wufei and Dorothy, Zechs, Trowa and Quatre.

"I LOVE YOU QUATRE!" Trowa yelled on the way to the bottom.

"I LOVE YOU TOO!" Quatre screamed and instantly started to make out with Trowa.

Dorothy kissed Zechs passionately. "I always secretly loved you Zechs Merquise." Zechs muttered to himself.

Wufei put his head between his legs and…kissed his ass goodbye.

Relena just wailed on the way down flapping her little chicken arms trying to float up, but was hit by Wufei kissing his own ass.

"And we still have ten minutes to spare!" Duo said, gasping for air.

"Hold on," Trinity said and hit three buttons on the dash. One setting out a parachute, the second, popping out a flotation device for the entire car and the third to set the car upright. "All right, show me what you got, Shinigami!" Trinity cried and attacked Duo again.

** SPLASH! **

Trinity's car hit the water. Shortly followed by Heero, Relena, Wufei and Dorothy's car,  with Dorothy, Zechs, Quatre and Trowa, who were all making out.

"I hate dolls." Heero muttered, smacking Relena with a 2x4 piece of driftwood.

The End (it sucked didn't it?)

Author's notes:

Ok, yeah the ending was rushed, so sue me, no…wait…don't I have no money or a job…whatever. Here are a few things that should be explained. Well, that wasn't the real ending…

Koi—casual way of saying girlfriend/ boyfriend in Japanese.

What happened to Hilde and Franz? Well, Hilde sued Franz for sexual harassment for $9,000 dollars and won the case, after which Hilde came out of the closet and is now a raging lesbian. Franz now works at Burger Buxx

Duo and Trinity: they got married in a bar and now have 2 dogs, a cat, nine fish and 3 parakeets. They plan on having kids someday.

Heero and Relena: Heero killed Relena and began to stalk Dorothy. Relena's ghost still stalks Heero.

Dorothy and Zechs:  Dorothy claimed she loved Zechs, and then denied it. They broke up and Dorothy is now claiming that she is currently dating Heero.

Wufei: Sued Crap-tell Toys, Int. and lost his case of not making the Wufei Christies not real enough.

Trowa and Quatre: Let's just say that all's well in their bedroom.

Rashid: Won a prize for his pink cookies and now owns Rashid's PINK COOKIE Bakery.

Ok, I don't own Gundam Wing, never have, probably never will (unless I become filthy rich ^_^) and if I did own it, it would probably be as screwed up as this fic. This was purely for fun, and after reading it, you're either

A) Laughing your ass off

B) Laughing your ass off on the floor

C) Plotting to take over the world

D) Going to send me one nasty-ass e-mail saying that my creativity sucks ass and I should be examined.

I own Trinity, Franz and Burger Buxx, and if you have a problem with that, well too bad because they're mine! ::author laughs evilly::

(for real this time) The End

Created on: June 28, 2001

Finished on: July 11, 2001