While this may be somewhat maudlin, and not what many wanted to read, I decided to write this as an important element in the Deep Regrets storyline. It won't be the last story in that storyline, but it will be the endpoint of the series in terms of a chronological ordering of the stories. I hope that despite the nature of the story you all enjoy it nonetheless. Gregg.
Disclaimer: I don't own, or profit from, these characters or franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
The elderly woman walked slowly along the rows of markers denoting the names and basic information of the individuals who were buried in the cemetery. Dr. Temperance Brennan had been to Arlington National Cemetery many times over the decades for a variety of reasons, but this was the most difficult. Not even one month ago when she had been here last to attend the funeral of her beloved husband of 58 years, Seeley Booth. He'd died peacefully in his sleep, his health good until the end, but he had been nearly 100 years old. Being in her mid-nineties she knew that she herself would likely not have much time left herself, despite her exceptionally good health, but as long as she was alive she would come here and fulfill a promise she had made to him a little over six decades previously.
Her Great-Grandson was walking beside her holding a folding chair for her to use. The young man was 22 and had been enamored with her since he was a young boy. He always brought to mind for her the memories of a very young Parker who had been equally enamored so long ago. As it was he had been staying with her since Booth had passed away and she was grateful for the help, and the company. Finally they reached the spot and she halted, leaning a bit on her cane. The walk was difficult on her, but she was up to the challenge.
"Can I be alone with him for a while?" she asked her Great-Grandson.
"Sure, Grandma," Seth replied. "How long?"
"I believe 30 minutes should be adequate," Brennan told him, her clinical tone coming through slightly. "Please come and help me then."
"Are you sure you don't want me to stay here?" he asked.
Brennan felt her eyes watering slightly, almost angry with herself at the lack of emotional control, but worked to compartmentalize it well. "I'm sure, Seth," she said as she placed a frail hand on the strong young one. "This is something I need to do myself. I promised him a long time ago, and I couldn't imagine ever breaking a promise to Booth."
"I'll be back in half an hour, Grandma," Seth said and then walked away after setting up the folding chair for her and helping her to sit down, ignoring her protests that she was perfectly capable of sitting down onto a chair.
Bones looked at the military cross and the words on it. Then the rank. Sergeant Major. She mentally cringed at that. If she hadn't hurt him so badly when she foolishly rejected him that one night so long ago it would read Master Sergeant. The hurt, and emotional trauma that both had gone through as a result of that foolishness, still haunted her slightly, no matter how much his forgiveness, and the life they'd had together, had eased the anguish she felt.
"If you were here I would kick your ass for making me have to do this," she said finally. "I have no idea what to say, Booth."
She stopped. She recalled another time she had believed him dead. The memory of those two weeks brought a chill to her, and she shivered slightly. The hollow emptiness she'd felt at that time had been so devastating that she'd completely lost all emotional feeling. The utter relief she'd felt when it turned out he was alive had shown itself in her utter fury over not having been told. Over the years they had laughed at it, usually when she would come into the bathroom and he would be in there wearing that ridiculous beer hat that she hated so much. Another of those missed opportunities she dwelled on sometimes.
"I once thought I'd lost you, Booth, and you came back," she said finally. "But this time you won't be. I won't get to be held by you in our bed. I won't be able to enjoy your company in my study while you read one of your graphic novels," she continued, allowing his comics the nomenclature he preferred. "You know what the worst part is, though? I won't ever get to see your face, and the smile you give me which makes me feel like I am the most special woman in the world. You gave me so much for all these decades, including the time before we were married, and now it's all gone except for the memories. You just had to go and die first, didn't you?"
Another lengthy pause. She looked down at her hand and pondered the wedding ring that was on her ring finger. The light captured the facets of the diamonds perfectly, and the brilliance intrigued her. Her mind, ever active, thought of the process of cutting and setting such a beautiful stone. Despite all the technological advances in the last however many decades, something as common as cutting diamonds was still done on the time honored way. In many ways it was like Booth. No matter all the electronic toys the man accumulated, or how sophisticated their home had become, he had kept his routine, and his ultimate enjoyment, simple and unchanging. Spending time with her and reading his graphic novels.
"You knew, didn't you?" she asked. "You knew you would die first, and gave me all those memories to help me to survive without you. Those wonderful memories of all the time you spend with me in my study, or on our stone slab just watching the beauty around us on our property."
It struck her then like a lightening bolt. She suddenly knew why he had extracted that promise from her to come visit him at his grave. The trust he'd had in them even at that point, before all the pain and misery of her rejection of him, overwhelmed her, and brought another tear to her eye.
"And you knew that I wouldn't share most of those wonderful memories with anyone because what's ours is ours," she observed. "That's why the promise to come visit you. Even then you were looking out for me, and gave me a way to share what we had. To share my memories out loud, even if you aren't here with me. It may have taken me over 60 years, but I finally understand."
She pictured in her mind him standing there beside her saying "I told you so, Bones." She chuckled briefly. Then she said her goodbye.
"I don't think I can put into words how much you mean to me, even now, Booth," she stated firmly. She noticed Seth coming her way and knew that her pauses and halting thoughts had taken up a great deal of time. "You gave me more than I think I ever deserved, but what I needed anyway. And while I can't explain it, I feel you here with me. I will continue to keep my promise, Booth, until I myself die."
She stood up and haltingly walked the short distance to the cross. Leaning down slowly, she kissed the top of it.
"I love you, Seeley Joseph Booth, and I will be back in one week to share some memories, and remind you of how much I will always love you," she said in a whisper. Standing straight she looked over at Seth.
"Are you okay, Grandma?" he asked, not sure he'd ever seen her so emotional before. It wasn't so much the outward appearance that made him think she was emotional, but, rather, the feel of the whole situation.
"I will be," she assured him. She smiled. "Why don't you take us to the Diner? I think I want to try some pie. I have the feeling that your Great-Grandfather may have been right about a lot of things I disagreed with him about."
Seth laughed. His Great-Grandmothers long running argument with his Great-Grandfather about whether to have some pie was legendary. If she was going to actually eat pie, then he was definitely going to be there to witness it, and take pictures. No one would believe him otherwise.
For her part, Bones felt a slight warmth run through her like it always did when Booth entered a room she was in. She smiled, realizing that in all likelihood he was right again and he was right there with her, despite how illogical that may sound. She was very glad she had fulfilled her promise.
A/N: I wrote this one as a short one, but I think it was effective. I hope you all enjoyed it. Gregg.