James sighed and rolled his shoulders before twisting his neck from side to side to crack it. He loved his job just as much as he did when he'd first started two years ago, but staying hunched over a desk for hours on end grading exams and reports certainly did a number on his back.
"How's it going?"
He hummed in thanks when a fresh mug of tea was placed in front of him, but the sound died on a moan when Rose rested her hands on his shoulders and started kneading at his tense muscles. He set his pen down and leaned into her touch, sighing happily as her lips traced the path her fingers were taking.
"It's going," he said when she wrapped her arms around his neck in a backwards hug. "There's definitely improvement from the beginning of the semester, so that's good."
"That is good," she agreed, and she glanced across his desk at the mess of papers sprawled across its surface. "Is there anything I can do to help? Organizing, maybe?"
"Yeah, that'd be brilliant," he said. "Wait… No, you've got that big project left to fill. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. You go work on whatever you need to work on. Or just relax for a bit."
"No need. We finished the rest of our projects this afternoon," Rose said. "Now that the nice autumn weather is mostly over, the rush of photoshoots is over, too. So how can I help?"
"All right, then." James rifled through his folder until he tugged out several sheets of paper. "Would you very much mind alphabetizing and recording the scores for me? I'll input them into the computer later. Everything's more or less organized by section, but let me know if you get lost."
"Your wish is my command," Rose said, ruffling his hair before she stepped away from him to lounge on the sofa, spreading the stacks of papers out on the coffee table.
They worked quietly for several hours, and when it was time for bed, James had everything graded, and all that was left to do was put them into the gradebook.
"Thanks so much," James murmured, settling himself into bed beside her.
He tugged the duvet up to their shoulders and gathered Rose close to his chest. She draped a leg over his and wrapped her arm around his waist and nestled her head in the crook of his neck. James played with her hair, enjoying the feel of the soft, silky strands slipping through his fingers as he contemplated what they could do for their anniversary. He could hardly believe it was going to be three years since his soulmate and best friend became his wife, and he could hardly believe that he fell deeper in love with her with every passing day.
"So, I was thinking," Rose murmured, absently tracing her fingers across his collarbone.
"Dangerous thing, thinking," he said lightly.
Rose snorted and smacked his chest. He caught her hand and pressed a kiss to her knuckles.
"What were you thinking, love?"
But Rose didn't answer right away. She chewed on her bottom lip as she struggled to put voice to her idea, and she finally decided to just go for it.
"My birth control runs out at the end of the month," she said, trying to calm her racing heart when she felt him still beneath her. "And I was thinking… Maybe I could just… not refill it?"
James was silent for a few long seconds, and Rose was about to tell him to forget it when he started moving. He rolled over onto his side, forcing Rose onto her side as well.
"You want to start a family," he stated, scanning her face.
"Thought about it," she said nonchalantly.
She'd gone on a photoshoot several weeks ago for a family that wanted to debut their new twins. Seeing the mother and father cradling their two tiny babies while also making sure to give their eldest boy his due turn in their arms was heartwarming. The utter awe in the dad's face made for an absolute perfect candid shot as he sat his four-year-old in his lap and helped the boy hold his baby sister. Despite it not having been a scripted shot, it turned out to be one of the family's favorites.
Since that day, Rose couldn't help but wonder how James would look, cuddling and playing with their child, and she found herself desperately wanting to make a baby with him. She wanted to be made a mother, and for James to be a father, and for them to start a family of their own. She wanted it so much she ached.
But James still hadn't said anything.
"So, what do you think?" she whispered.
James blew out a shaky breath and reached out for her hand.
"I've thought about it," he admitted. "And I want kids one day. But I'm—"
"What?" Rose asked, stroking her thumb over his.
"My mum and dad had a lot of trouble conceiving," he said, though Rose already knew this. "And with staying pregnant. The grief nearly tore them apart; my dad wanted to keep trying, but my mum was so heartbroken, and she didn't want to lose any more babies. They were in therapy for years, and even when they were pregnant with me, they were still so tense. And Mum had trouble bonding with me, because she was so sure I'd be taken away from her too."
"And you're worried about what will happen to us if things don't go smoothly?" she guessed.
"A bit," he said. "I love you so much Rose, and I would love to have a baby with you. I'm just… I don't know."
"It's okay," she said honestly. As much as she wanted to start a family with him, she needed him to be completely on board with it too. "Really. We don't have to try yet. We're still young. We've got time."
"I just… you said it runs out at the end of the month?" he confirmed.
"Mhm."
"Let me think about it?" he requested.
"Take all the time you need, love," she said, slipping her hand out from his to cup his cheek. "I won't be upset by whatever you decide. I… wanted to put it on your radar, so to speak."
James smiled at her, and opened his arms for her again. She scooted forward and draped her arm across his ribs as he wrapped her in a hug. She felt him press his lips to the top of her head before he murmured, "Love you."
"As I love you," she whispered.
oOoOo
"Can I ask you something?" James asked, meticulously drying the plate in his hand.
His dad shut off the water and picked up a towel to dry his hands as he turned to James. "Always."
"When you and Mum decided… When did you know that you were ready to start a family?" James asked, turning to put the plate in the cabinet.
"I always knew I wanted to have a baby with your mother," Robert said. "For more practical reasons, your mum and I waited until we were both done or nearly done with our doctorate programs. But I always wanted kids, and so did she. Are you and Rose—?"
James sighed and rubbed his hands across his face and muttered, "Rose brought it up a couple weeks ago. And I want to start a family with her, but…"
"But what?" Robert prompted.
James shrugged.
"If you want to start a family, and so does Rose, I'm not quite sure I see the problem," Robert said.
"What if we have the same troubles you and Mum did?" James blurted out. "I can't… I don't want…"
"Nobody wants that," his dad said gently. "Sometimes couples are just unlucky in that regard. But you need to stay honest with each other. That's where a lot of the problems between me and your mum started; neither of us were truly honest about what we wanted or how we felt, because we were worried about upsetting each other. I'm sure you can relate to that, mate."
James nodded, remembering the fight that had gone down on Rose's nineteenth birthday.
"But it was all worth it, in the end," his dad continued with a smile. "There was more heartbreak and disappointment than either of us would have wanted, but neither your mother or I would have traded you for the four that we lost."
"Four?" James asked, blinking. "I thought it was three?"
"Ah. Right. We, er, we lost another one after you were born. We'd hoped that because you… Well… It wasn't meant to be," Robert said, shrugging. While the pain of their losses still ached, he'd made his peace with it. As he said, he wouldn't trade James for anything. "You were little; you probably don't remember. But that was the last one."
They finished up the dishes in silence, and as the water drained, Robert said wryly, "This conversation probably did nothing to ease your concerns about trying for a baby, did it?"
James snorted out a laugh and said, "Not particularly. So, miscarriage fears aside… What if I'm just… rubbish at it? At fatherhood?"
"Oh, mate, everyone has those worries," Robert said, clapping him on the back. "No one is ever truly ready for a baby. It's a learning process. You make mistakes, but you figure it out. Those worries never truly go away. You're an adult now, but I still worry about you, and I worry I've not done enough for you, or that we could've done things differently for you."
"Really? But you and Mum were the best!" James argued.
"Thanks, mate. But my point is, if people let fear and logic dictate their family planning, our population would be a hell of a lot smaller than it is now. All that truly matters is that you love and support your child, no matter what."
James nodded as he absorbed everything his dad had told him. He tried to picture himself and Rose with a baby, and he found it surprisingly easy. He could readily see Rose cradling a tiny human to her breast, or him with toddler sitting in his lap with a book, or the three of them cuddled up in bed together watching a film.
Something deep in his chest ached at those mental pictures, and he thought he might have his answer at last.
oOoOo
Later that night, James set the final dish on the table just as he heard the front door unlock. Rose walked in and stopped when she saw the spread of food.
"What's all this for?" Rose asked, setting her shopping bags by the stairs so she could walk into the dining room.
"Dinner," he announced happily, gesturing to the steaming roast and vegetables and potatoes. "Can't a husband make a lovely meal for his lovely wife?"
Rose grinned up at him and stepped up to peck a kiss to his lips.
"Of course. Let me put my bags upstairs and then we can eat?"
James nodded and turned back to the table to finish pouring wine for them both. He lit a few candles and turned on soft instrumental music and dimmed the lights, ready for their impromptu date night.
Rose came back a few minutes later with her face washed of most of her makeup and her hair pulled back into a loose ponytail.
"Did you have a nice day with your mum?" James asked, pulling out her chair for her.
"I did," Rose said. "Got a mani/pedi and finished up my Christmas shopping. Had to sneak away from Mum for an hour to get a surprise for you."
James's belly coiled deliciously at the sultriness and suggestion behind her words, and he nearly choked on his tongue when Rose unfastened the top button of her blouse to reveal a hint of dark turquoise lace supporting her cleavage.
"How was your day with your dad?" Rose prompted, smiling innocently as she left her shirt unbuttoned.
"Good… great… yeah…" James blinked rapidly and forced himself to look at his plate of food to keep himself from hauling Rose into his arms and straight to their bedroom.
They mindlessly chattered about nothing in particular as they ate; James bemoaned the lack of visits from his students during his office hours, despite knowing quite a few of them needed the extra help, while Rose excitedly told him that her boss had given her permission to advertise digital art in addition to her photography.
"That's brilliant!" James praised, so proud of her. She'd come a long way from the five-year-old who was convinced she couldn't follow her love of art because she wouldn't be able to financially support herself.
James leaned back in his seat, full and drowsy from their meal. He stretched his legs out until his toes came into contact with the top of her foot, and he lazily brushed his feet against hers as he finished off his glass of wine.
"I've been thinking a lot lately about what you said. About going off your birth control."
Rose stiffened minutely, and James rubbed his foot up her calf soothingly.
"And?" she asked, biting her lip.
"And I really want to make a baby with you," he murmured, unable to contain his grin.
A slow smile spread across her lips, lighting up her face and making her look so beautiful.
"Yeah?" she asked.
James nodded and laughed as Rose jumped out of her seat to fling herself into his lap. He held her snugly to him as she peppered kisses across his face.
"And you're sure you're not saying yes just because I want it?" Rose verified.
"I've always known I wanted a family with you," he replied. "I knew I wanted kids one day. But then when you mentioned it… Well, I didn't realize how much I wanted it until you planted the idea. God, I want it so much, Rose. And yeah, I'm still scared, but I'm also so excited and impatient to start a family with you."
She cradled his cheeks in her hands, and James nuzzled into the touch. He reached up and guided her head down so he could catch her lips in his. Warmth and pleasure simmered inside him as he leisurely kissed his wife. Her tongue swiped across his bottom lip, and he opened his mouth on a happy sigh as he dropped his hands to her bum.
Her tongue slid across his before darting up to tease the ridges on the roof of his mouth. He shivered in desire and moaned when she scraped her nails across his scalp. He let his fingers dip beneath the waistband of her jeans and knickers to teasingly scratch and squeeze her bare bum. He delighted in her gasp of pleasure, and returned it with one of his own when Rose moved one of her hands from his hair and to his chest so she could scrape her fingernails across his nipples through his shirt.
He broke their kiss and nipped his way down her jaw, scraping his teeth against the skin below her ear before continuing down to the even more sensitive patch of skin where her neck met her shoulder. A peek of dark turquoise lace caught his eye, and he groan in anticipation, his mind's eye providing him with plenty of source material to imagine what Rose would look like in nothing but her bra and knickers.
He continued licking and sucking at her neck long enough to leave a bright pink mark he knew would be gone by morning. They'd perfected the art of knowing when to ease up on the love bites to prevent any hickeys from being on full display to the outside world. When he reached that limit, he continued to migrate across her neck to give attention to the other side.
On the next downward pass of Rose's hands, she opened her fingers to palm the front of his trousers, sending a potent bolt of pleasure low in his gut. He moaned into her shoulder and bucked up into her touch, but she'd moved her hand away to continue scratching at his chest.
He panted in desire and sucked hard on her neck as he moved one of his hands to the front of her jeans to press just so against her. She gasped out his name and her fingers clenched tightly in his hair. He popped the button of her jeans and lowered the zip to give him more room, and Rose thanked him by resting her hand against his erection again.
His eyes fluttered shut as sparks of pleasure swelled through him at her touch. He reached into her jeans to brush his fingers down the front of her knickers and to the small wet spot that was soaking through the fabric. It felt like lace, and James forced his eyes open to confirm that it was the complementary piece to her bra.
Rose gave him a hard squeeze that made colors burst behind his eyes, and he panted raggedly as she continued rubbing him through his jeans.
As brilliant as everything she was doing to him felt, he was aching for more.
"Hold on tight," he warned, moving his hands to the back of her thighs.
Rose wrapped her arms around his neck and he felt her abdomen tighten for balance as James stood with her in his arms. The chair toppled backwards, but he couldn't bring himself to care as he carried her to their couch, and unceremoniously dropped her onto the cushions.
She shrieked out a giggle, before she reached up and tugged him on top of her. He groaned and settled himself between her hips, grinding against her as he made quick work of the buttons of her shirt.
"This color looks fantastic on you," James rasped when he finally saw the bra she'd teased him with throughout dinner.
"You say that about everything," Rose moaned, arching into his touch as he palmed her breasts.
"S'true though," he answered, squeezing her breasts through her bra as he pushed them together to make even more cleavage. "You look fabulous in anything, love."
"Flatterer," she breathed, hooking a leg around her hip to grind against him harder.
"Always. Let's get these jeans off so I can see the bottom half, eh?"
James kneaded her breasts once more before he stood up to tug off her trousers. He shivered in desire as he looked down at his wife, clad in nothing but her knickers and bra, and looking thoroughly snogged and aroused.
He made quick work of his own jeans, tossing them to the floor with hers, before he tugged his jumper over his head and set it on the couch.
"Lovely as these are," James whispered, kissing his way up her thighs until he was hovering right where she was radiating moist heat, "these need to go." He scraped his teeth lightly against the crotch of her knickers, delighting in her moan of pleasure and the way she arched closer to his mouth. "Lift up, love."
Rose raised her hips up far enough for James to tug her knickers down her legs and situate his jumper under her bum to keep from needing to clean up too much later.
"You too," Rose ordered, reaching out to slip her hand below the waistband of his boxers to take him in hand. "Kit off."
James's eyes fluttered shut as she stroked him lazily.
"Position?" he asked, shoving his boxers down his legs. "Top, bottom, front, back?"
Rose regarded him for a minute, then sat up and rolled over until she was on her hands and knees. James swallowed thickly and absently stroked himself as Rose smirked back at him and said, "Will this do?"
"Oh, yes," he croaked, settling himself behind her.
He admired the view of her soft, pale skin, broken up only by the bra she still had on. He rested his hands on the swell of her bum, kneading and squeezing the firm flesh beneath his palms. He trailed his lips up and down her spine, before he leaned over her and sucked her earlobe into his mouth.
She hummed and arched back into his touch. James rested his front against her back as he wrapped his arms around her so one hand could tease her breasts and the other could dip down to stroke through her folds. He nestled his cock against the cleft of her arse and rutted slowly as he worked on making Rose delirious with pleasure.
She was moaning constantly as he moved between nibbling on her ears and sucking at the join of her neck and shoulder while he pinched her nipples and rubbed her clit.
"James, please," she begged, writhing against him for more stimulation. "Fuck me."
He shuddered with need, and found he could no longer deny either of them the ecstasy of release.
"As you wish," he murmured, scraping his teeth across her neck one more time before straightening up.
Rose rested her forearms against the armrest as James took his cock in hand and gently rubbed himself through her wetness. She mewled in pleasure as he stimulated her clit for a few seconds before lining himself up with her entrance.
"All right?" he breathed, clenching his jaw as her heat teased him.
"Yes, James, please."
He rolled his hips gently, slowly inching his way inside her. She was so tight and her walls were already fluttering around him.
"A bit worked up, are you, love?" he bit out when he was buried as deep as he could go.
"Piss off," she gasped, tightening her muscles around him as she thrust back against him, desperate for him to move. "You know how turned on I get around you."
James giggled and draped himself across her back again, wanting to feel her skin against his. The lacey band of her bra provided a contrast to her warm, smooth skin, and feeling it scrape across his chest made goosebumps prickle across his skin.
He wrapped his arms around his wife as he began to move, thrusting in and out of her as Rose braced them against the armrest. James grunted into her neck as he continued licking and sucking at her shoulder while his hands danced across her front. He teased her breasts and clit as he held her tight against him.
Rose's cries began increasing in pitch and tempo, and James felt his belly swoop in response. He wrapped his arms more securely around her ribs as he snapped his hips faster into her, chasing the pressure of pleasure that was quickly building.
He buried his face into her shoulder and dropped his hand to rub clumsy circles against her clit as her muscles clenched tight around his cock. She shouted out a jumble of words—curses and his name, mostly—and James's breath choked in his throat as his vision warped.
With a grunt of her name, his hips jerked forwards a few times before stilling so he was as deep as he could as the pressure in his groin exploded outwards. He squeezed his eyes shut against the stars in his vision and he clenched his teeth as he groaned his relief into her skin. Hot shivers rippled through his veins, making him shudder and bury closer to the woman who made him feel such intense pleasure.
He'd been making love to Rose for five years, and yet it was still as intense and special as their first time. And soon, their lovemaking was about to serve a greater purpose than simply sharing in a mutual pleasure.
"Love you," he murmured, nuzzling into her shoulder as he slipped out of her.
"Love you, too," she answered. "That was bloody brilliant."
James hummed in agreement before he tugged his jumper out from under Rose's knees and gave himself and Rose a quick wipe to clean them. He then tugged her down onto the cushions and spooned his body around hers and held her close, loving the feeling of having her in his arms.
His palm brushed across her belly, and he could almost imagine the way it would feel as she grew round with their growing child.
"I really want a baby with you," he admitted, tickling her bellybutton with his fingertips. "I really, really want it."
Rose turned her head back to look at him. She reached back and threaded her fingers through the hair on the back of his head to tug him in for a kiss. It was a slow and lazy press of their lips, a kiss to offer love and comfort and solidarity, and Rose murmured against his mouth, "I do too. I'll give my gyno a call tomorrow, see if it's safe for me to just go off my pill. And we'll let whatever happens happen."
"Sounds like a plan," James said, pressing another soft kiss to the corner of her mouth.