For Kat because she had a bad day and for helping me come up with the title. Love you soul sister!

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Chapter 1

Betty Cooper sighed and threw her messenger bag on the worn plaid couch before sitting down in front of her desktop computer.

"What's wrong Bets?" Jughead Jones asked, not looking up from the article he was editing for one of the freshman who had joined the Blue & Gold staff after their principal had told them for it to be school funded, they needed to let other students join.

"Archie's dating Valerie now, did you know that?"

"He might have mentioned he was going to ask her out. Why? Still waiting for the day when Archie wakes up and realizes you're the one he wants?"

"Are you taking over my job as editor-in-chief?"

"Only because we have a deadline to meet and you weren't here."

Betty nodded and pulled up the news story she had been working on all week. "Hey Juggie?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think Archie and I are endgame?"

"English please," Jughead answered.

"Do you think we're going to end up together, like happily ever after stuff?"

"Well, shucks Betty. I don't know. We're not even out of high school yet. And I don't think Archie is really the settling down type." Jughead's expression softened when he saw the look on her face. "But if he was going to have happily ever after, the little yellow house and white picket fence then it would probably be with you."

Betty sighed. "Thank you but you're just being nice."

Jughead shook his head. "No. No, any guy would be lucky to have you. You're perfect."

"That's what Archie said."

"He's not all bad," Jughead reflected. "He's just a teenage boy and he only has one thing on his mind and you're not that kind of girl."

"You're a teenage boy and you don't have one thing on your mind," Betty pointed out.

"I've got too much going on to be like that," Jughead answered. "Besides, you've seen my family life. Do you think I could drag a girlfriend into all that?"

"I don't know. I'm here, aren't I?"

"We've already established you're not like the other girls," Jughead answered, leaning back in his chair and clicking his red pen with his thumb. He smiled at her. "You know, Archie's the kind of boy who wants something he can't have."

"What do you mean?"

"If you were involved, he might be interested."

Betty rolled her eyes. "Yeah, there's a long line of guys who are so interested in taking me out."

"I could do it," Jughead said tentatively.

Betty frowned at him. "What's in it for you?"

"My motives are pure, I promise!" Jughead swore.

"You're not going to write a scathing exposé about girls being the absolute worst just so you can get into the college of your choice?" Betty asked. "You don't have a bet with Reggie and the guys to see if you can get me to date you?"

"This isn't a chick flick, Betts. They're not paying me to date you so they can go out with Polly or humiliate you or anything. And you are hardly the stereotypical "ugly duckling" type they portray in movies."

"The ones that is so obviously not ugly?" Betty added.

"Yeah. There's nothing going on like that," Jughead assured her. "They pretty much all think I'm a women-hater, anyways."

"Well, let's be honest, you haven't exactly been taking girls to Pop's Diner and a drive-in movie every Friday night."

"That, my friend, is our ritual! I'll only be sharing French fries with you, thank you very much."

Betty smiled. "You're the best, Juggie."

"So do you wanna?" Jughead asked, uncomfortable with her praise.

"Do the fake dating thing?" Betty clarified.

"Why not? We're almost always together these days, people might think it progressed naturally," Jughead said.

"I don't know. . . if it's not going to be mutually beneficial, I don't see how it's going to work out."

"Maybe if we date, people will stop assuming things about my sexuality."

"I thought you didn't care what people thought about you," Betty said.

"Oh, I don't! I'm just coming up with justifiable reasons for you to let me help you. Pretend it's working," Jughead answered.

"Okay," Betty replied. "BUT we need to come up with terms and agreements first. We want to be believable."

"Our long-standing Friday night date continues as usual," Jughead said automatically. "We'll accompany each other to school functions."

"Like prom?" Betty asked hopefully.

"I would be more than happy to take you to prom with me," Jughead answered. "I know how disappointed you were last year when nobody asked you to go with them."

Betty smiled. "Thank you!"

"No problem. So, what else do you expect from this deal? Holding hands? Long kisses against your locker in the hallway?"

"Holding hands would be nice," she agreed. "But we don't really have to make out in the hall. I mean, we can have some propriety. We don't even have to kiss at all, really."

"Ah, yes. We're still saving ourselves for Archibald, aren't we?"

"And how many girls have you kissed?"

"Less than the average male high school student," Jughead replied. "When should we start our epic ruse?"

"How about right away?" Betty answered. "We've got nothing to lose."

"Except everyone's gone for the day," Jughead reminded her. "Except for Patrick. He was waiting for me to finish editing his piece about the mystery meat in the cafeteria."

Betty shook her head. "All the freshman do pieces about mystery meat. WAIT! Patrick's still here!? Do you think he heard?"

They both looked over at the curly-haired teenagers, he was leaning back in a chair, tapping his beat-up Vans against the desk, Five Finger Death Punch was pulsing through his headphones, his eyes were closed while he head banged along to the music.

"I don't think he can hear anything through that," Jughead reassured her, tossing a wadded up piece of paper at Patrick's head.

"Huh? Is it time to go yet?" Did you finish looking over my article?" Patrick asked, yanking out his skull earbuds.

"See?" Jughead said, winking at Betty.

"See?" Patrick repeated. "See what!? Is it bad!?"

"Calm down, you're fine!" Jughead answered. "It's not a hard-hitting news story but it'll do for your first piece. Why don't you leave? Don't you need to be home for dinner?"

"Eh, it's fine! I told my mom that I had to stay after school for extra-curricular. Why?"

Jughead cleared his throat. "Well, it's just that. . . Betty and I haven't been alone all day and I really wanted to be with her for a little bit."

Patrick's eyes got as big as saucers as he flew out of his chair and grabbed his backpack. "You and Betty!? Cool! I'll go now! 'Bye! See you tomorrow!"

"There's no backing out now. It'll be all around school by tomorrow," Jughead said as the Blue & Gold doors slammed shut. "Teenage boys talk just as much as teenage girls these days."

Betty smiled. "Hey, I'm game if you're game!"

TBC. . .

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Author's Note:

Okay, so this is not EXACTLY "10 Things I Hate About You" so much as it's a mashup of all my favorite romcoms and 90s teen movies. I hope you guys don't mind too much! It will be heavily "10 Things" influenced. I just rewatched it this weekend and there are too many good moments to leave out. I hope you enjoyed this! Chapter 2 will be up this weekend. In the meantime, I hope you'll tell me what you thought.

Until Next Time!

Love,

Holly, 3/13/2017