Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

Note: Written for the Astronomy Assignment Task 2 (Write about a character finding an alternative way to solve a problem) and the Water Balloons Challenge (coming into a room covered in blood and grow your own boy toy).

WC: 1497

Summer Shenanigans

It started as a joke—or rather, a gag gift. He expected as much from Fred and George, but it always caught him by surprise when Bill decided to pull one on him. The eldest Weasley was a laid-back individual, calm and sensible on a good day, but few were aware he possessed a mischievous streak long enough to rival the twins. It only emerged on rare instances, but when it did, Ron was prepared to halt right in his tracks and walk in the opposite direction. Too bad that never stopped Bill's assault though; if anything, it only made him more determined and resulted in greater amusement on his end.

After Bill returned from a job in Asia, he parceled out presents to his family. Ron should have paid more attention to the dread pooling in his stomach when Bill handed him an unsuspecting box with that suspicious glint in his twinkling blue eyes.

And now a confused boy was staring back at him, drenched from head to toe, looking distinctly awkward as he stood in that tiny basin of water. Ron stubbornly refused to glance down at the boy's state of undress, and instead he snatched the opened kit that lay discarded on his bedroom floor. He had tossed the thing once he read the contents, rolling his eyes at Bill's gift. But his brother must have snuck into his room and placed the little figurine in water while Ron was out. He cursed Bill in his head, vowing to enlist the help of Fred and George for payback.

But he had a more pressing matter to deal with: the boy standing stark naked in his room. Ron rummaged around for a dry towel and some clean clothes before shoving the bundle into the boy's arms, only to receive a curious stare in return.

"Put those on," Ron ordered gruffly, pointedly looking in the other direction.

"Is that what you want me to do, Master?"

Ron immediately winced. "Don't call me that."

The boy blinked, tilting his head. "What should I call you?" he asked. Ron told the boy his name, hearing a faint rustle behind him, and he turned around when it stopped. Even he was given Ron's smallest clothes, the red Weasley sweater from three years ago dwarfed his slighter frame and the shorts nearly trailed down to his ankles.

"And what's your name?"

"I'm Harry. Is there anything you'd like me to do?"

"Just, just stay here," Ron said, pausing at the door. "And don't touch anything," he added as an afterthought, hesitant to leave him alone, unattended. Harry nodded, examining the Quidditch posters on the wall with interest. The redhead carefully closed the door behind him before storming down the stairs, rounding on Bill as soon as he saw him. The man was in the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of tea when he suddenly found himself with an irritated younger brother to deal with.

"Hey, Ron. Want a cup?" he asked, gesturing to the kettle.

"No, I don't want a cup," Ron growled out. Bill was taken aback by his tone but grinned when he realized the source of his ire.

He leaned against the counter, crossing his arms languidly across his chest. "Why so tense? I thought you'd appreciate my gift."

"I don't," Ron glowered. "What am I supposed to do with that thing in my room? And what am I going to tell mum?"

Bill shrugged. "Just think of him as a pet. Clothe him, feed him, bathe him," he emphasized the last part, smirking at the rising blush on his brother's cheeks. Ron sputtered indignantly, looking as if he were moments away from strangling Bill before he stomped away, cursing him loudly. Bill chuckled when their mother scolded Ron from the next room. Ah, it was much too fun messing with his siblings. Now he just needed to wait for the others to open their presents.

That night, the Weasley family gathered around the dining room table, preparing to eat a hearty dinner. Ron was busy piling his plate with an impressive amount of food when Bill cleared his throat pointedly.

"Aren't you forgetting about a certain someone upstairs?" Ron froze, the spoon full of mashed potatoes still in his hands. A loud splat filled the now silent room as the mush plopped onto his plate.

"You have a friend upstairs, and you didn't invite them down?" Molly asked, voice dangerously quiet. When she placed her hands on her hips, Ron winced at the threatening gleam in her eye. "You will march right up there, and bring them down to eat with us," she ordered sternly.

"I was going to bring him a plate of food later," he grumbled, rushing out the room when she shot him a warning look.

Not even five minutes later, Harry was seated next to Ron who forcefully shoved a forkful of food into his mouth.

"So, Harry dear, how long have you known, Ron?" Molly asked kindly, spooning an alarming amount of food on a plate for him.

"I have known Master Ron for approximately 2 hours," he said seriously, frowning curiously when everyone was struck speechless for the second time that night. The plate in Molly's lax hand crashed onto the table, the mashed potatoes splattering all over the surface. No one paid that any mind, staring instead at the confused Harry and the reddening Ron. And that was when all chaos broke loose.

"Master Ron?" the twins cried out. Percy shot him a disgusted look while Ginny merely rose an eyebrow, examining the two in a different light. Charlie shrugged it off, leaning in to quietly explain what was going on to their dad. Bill was busy laughing his head off, and their mum… Ron was too afraid to even look in her direction.

"Ronald Bilius Weasley," she said slowly, and he flinched at the full use of his name. "Did you hire this boy and invite him over for sexual activities?"

He hurried to explain himself, sweating profusely under Molly's condemning glare.

"Master Ron has yet to touch me," Harry offered helpfully, not understanding the disapproving pinch to the woman's mouth.

"Stop talking!" he panicked. At Harry's "Yes, Master," Ron wanted nothing more than to shrivel up and die in a hole. "Stop calling me that!"

"You shouldn't ignore your little friend," Bill said, watching as Ron rummaged around for a snack. "He might get into some trouble."

Ron stubbornly ignored his brother but froze at Bill's next comment.

"I just saw the twins looking for him a moment ago," he said casually. Ron immediately dropped the bag of chocolate frogs and started scouring the house for those two culprits and their victim. He opened his bedroom door with sweaty palms, hesitating before swinging it open. He was greeted with the chilling sight of Harry kneeling in a pool of his own blood, white shirt soaked in red, covering as much of the pale skin as it could.

"Are you alright?" Ron exclaimed, stepping closer to look at his wounds but it was so difficult to see under all the blood.

"Oh, yes, I'm fine," Harry stated, staring at the contraption in his hands. "Fred and George wanted me to test out this product. It explodes quite a bit of paint for such a small thing."

Oh, thank Merlin, Ron sighed, sagging in relief. He didn't have to explain to his mother that their new guest died because of the twins's antics.

Maybe he was approaching this the wrong way, Ron thought, eyeing the other boy warily. If he ignored Harry for too long, then Fred and George wouldn't hesitate to snatch the unsuspecting soul in their wicked clutches, and this house didn't need another prankster. Ron shuddered at the thought. He had to start paying more attention to Harry, invite him to a game of Quidditch since Percy never played, and the teams were uneven now that Charlie left.

But first, he had some cleaning to do.

Ron hid behind a tree, clutching his weapon close. Fred and George were currently dominating, working together as a team to attack the others, but Ginny was another force to be reckoned with. That girl wasn't afraid to play dirty. Bill had been strangely absent for a while, something that didn't sit well with Ron. He could handle Percy and maybe even Charlie; he just needed to play his cards right.

Just as he stepped out from his hiding place, a balloon smashed into his face, sending a gush of water down his throat. Ron sputtered, blinking rapidly to clear his vision. Coughing, he gaped when Bill gave Harry a high-five.

"Good job, Harry," Bill praised, handing him another balloon. "Let's see if you can hit him again."

That was all the warning Ron got before it flew toward him, smacking him in the chest. He yelped as a shower of water and balloons came soaring at him from all sides.