ALIENS VS. PREDATOR….
POLITICAL EDITION!1!1!one!21
One day Alien and Predator were fighting to see who was better. Of course they beated the crap out of each other so much they could never finish the battles. So they decided to run for president! They even got those ties that make you look all important and stuff. Then came the reporters.
A reporter says "Mr. Alien and Mr. Predator, what will you do when your president?"
Alien says "I will ban abortion, FOR IT IS NOT NICE TO KILL UNBORN BABIES, ESPECIALLY ONES THAT COME OUT YOUR CHEST AND KILL YOU!"
Predator says "I will make hunting the national sport, to show other nations that we kick ass in wars and we will always win if we fight them for some reason."
Another reporter says "speaking of wars, Mr. Predator, what will you do if were in one?"
Predator says "I shall go to the battlefield myself and cut the enemy's head off and put in my trophy collection!"
Many people cheered, and Alien was mad. So the next afternoon he made a campaign ad commercial.
The commercial says "Predator likes to……..PLAY WITH DOLLIES! Do you want a president that plays with dollies? Or do you want a real man, like Alien? VOTE FOR ALIEN!"
Predator saw the commercial and was pissed. Those were action figures, god dammit! So later that day he and Alien went on live TV to smack talk each other.
Predator says "how dare you make that ad!"
Alien says "the people need to now the truth!"
Predator says "I should destroy you here and now!"
Alien says "MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR DUDE!"
Predator says "TAKE A BATH YOU FILTHY HIPPIE!"
People cheered, this was better than fondue night.
Just then a important guy comes with some papers. SOME PAPERS MAN! ISN'T THAT FREAKING AWESOME!
The Important Guy says "I have the results! Our new president is………………………………...Barry the Disco Biscuit!"
Alien and Predator says "OMGWTFBBQ!"
A biscuit then appears.
Barry says "thank you all, fare citizens, for choosing me as your president, NOW LETS PARTAH!"
And they did.
END?