He dropped to his knees, dirtying the pants of his suit and letting the bouquet of roses that he brought tumble to the ground into a puddle of water. Rain poured down and created an even more depressing atmosphere. He let the drops soak his hair as he hung his head low, not daring to spare another glance at what lay before him.
"Hello, Midorima-kun," Kuroko greeted with a straight face. Midorima huffed and leaned in the doorway.
"What do you want?" Shintaro was busy studying for upcoming AP finals, but was taken away from his work when someone knocked on his door. That someone just happened to be a guy that he played basketball with back in middle school and Midorima had seemingly tried to cut off all contact with him, but apparently failed to do so.
"I was lonely," the teenager deadpanned, "and there are a few things I'd like to get off my mind." He appeared emotionless, but on the inside, he was resisting the urge to make a break for it clear down the street and bury himself alive, which seemed like what Midorima wanted him to do. It took all of his courage to try and reach out to someone, and Kuroko figured that Midorima would be the best person to open up to. Who would give better advice than him?
"I do not have time for your miniscule problems, Kuroko." The bespectacled male paused for a moment, contemplating his next words. "This is not middle school and we are no longer friends. Why'd you contact me of all people anyways?"
Those words struck Tetsuya right in the heart, but he didn't dare show it. "No reason. I'm sorry for bothering you. Have a good night, Midorima-kun." And with that, the greenette nodded and closed the door, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his index finger afterwards.
"Who does he think he is, coming all the way from Tokyo to try and talk to me on a Thursday night," the green eyed ace of Shotuko mumbled to himself. A thought nagged at his mind, despite his silent pleads for it to go away and never come back. What if what Kuroko was trying to tell him really was important? He quickly shook his head. If it was that important, he would have told him even after Midorima said he was busy, or so he thought.
"I'd do anything to take it back, Kuroko," the tall person said, resting his head on the tombstone infront of him as tears rolled down his cheeks, mixing with the drops of rain that also made their way down his pale face. He pushed the lost boy away when he needed him the most, and Midorima regrets that more than anything. Kuroko really tried to reach out for help.
"Look up," fourteen year old Kuroko said. Midorima's eyes traveled upwards, landing on the trillions of dots of light sprinkled over the sky above them.
"They're stars," the middle schooler stated simply, and Tetsuya nodded.
"I like to think that inside every star is a completely different world. That the only way we get any glimpse of that universe is through its outer shell, which doesn't give us much to judge them on," Kuroko said. "But even the brightest of stars can burn out at any given moment. In the end, it's what's inside of them that really determines their fate."
Midorima tried to imagine that for himself, billions of living organisms inside of one chosen star. What if our universe was also inside of a star, and like Kuroko said, it could burn out at any given moment? He shook his head, ridding it of those fictional thoughts.
"That's only science fiction," the greenette said blandly, making Kuroko laugh lightly for the first time ever. He looked at the phantom with surprise in his eyes, seeing a weary smile on his lips.
"They're a lot like people when you think about it."
"Explain yourself," Midorima ordered, feeling intrigued against his own personal will.
"You can never judge someone by their appearance, like a star. You never know exactly what's going on inside of a person. They can snap at any moment, totally out of the blue," he explained, his soft blue eyes never leaving the dark sky as he talked.
Midorima wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. It was all true... a little too true for his liking.
"Was I too blind to see you struggling, or did you hide it on purpose?" Shintaro asked like he actually expected an answer from the body burried six feet under. Kuroko chose him of all people to open up to, only to get shot down. It was the guilt of that eating Midorima alive, keeping him up late every night. Tetsu didn't deserve this one bit.
"Shintaro, I'm afraid there's a problem," Akashi said in a strained voice. If Midorima didn't know any better, he'd say that the redhead was close to tears if he wasn't already crying.
"What is it?" asked the ace hesitantly. He heard his ex-captain suck in a deep breath, and he did the same.
"Tetsuya is hurt. Please come visit Oniwa Hospital if you want any further details." And with that, the redhead hung up, leaving Midorima speechless at the other end of the line. Kuroko was hurt, and judging by Akashi's reaction, it couldn't have been good. Maybe he was just having an off day though. Yeah, just an off day. Surely it couldn't be too bad, right?
God, was he wrong.
According to the nurse, Kuroko had tried to commit suicide. That stole the air right out of Midorima's lungs, and he stood as still as a statue. That was when Aomine lost it, running out of the room with tears in his eyes that were threatening to fall. Momoi ran after him, already crying. Instead of asking any further questions, the greenette took a seat beside his former teammate and held his cold hand, rubbing it to try and make it warm again like it always had been. Blue eyes flickered open and settled on the boy gripping his pale palm.
"Akashi, Murasakibara... Can I have a moment with Midorima?" the sickly male asked, not using any formalities since it would take more air, which he wasn't getting much of to begin with.
"Yes. Come, Atsushi." And with that, the both of them walked out of the hospital room. The giant ruffled Kuroko's hair before leaving, bidding a kind farewell to the two teenagers that remained in the room.
"Kuroko, why?" Midorima's grip on his hand tightened, and Tetsuya gave a faint squeeze back. He had a thick white bandage wrapped around his head and there was a huge scrape on the side of his face and neck, along with a dark blue ring around his right eye. His lip was busted, and it was quite a disturbing sight to see. Midorima guessed that he landed on his face when he jumped off of the Seirin rooftop.
"Am I a coward for taking the easy way out?" Kuroko asked, avoiding his former teammate's question. Midorima shook his head. If anything, he was the coward for being too afraid to talk much during a time like this. Tears were burning his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. A deafening silence fell amongst the two, and neither bothered to break it. Midorima felt Kuroko's hand become colder by the second, but still tried to keep himself collected.
"Please do not blame yourself, Midorima-kun. I asked for this." Kuroko's lungs filled with a deep breath of air before deflating for the last time. The star had finally died out, leaving Midorima in the dark.
"Forgive me, Kuroko," the greenette cried out, not caring about sounding pathetic anymore. "I should have listened. I should have noticed that something was wrong. What kind of friend am I?! God, I didn't even claim you as a friend that night..." Midorima's conversation with Kuroko kept replaying in his mind. That night, most likely after he left Shintaro's house, Kuroko Tetsuya jumped off of the rooftop of Seirin High. Midorima couldn't help but blame himself after practically telling the boy to fuck off when he came to him for help.
Midorima's blood went cold as he felt his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. "Kuroko?" he whispered like talking any louder would make this nightmare a reality. This couldn't be happening. The dull, flat beep echoing throughout the cold room alerted doctors and nurses, and they all came rushing in, pushing Midorima out of the way. He couldn't leave Kuroko though. Not until he apologized for the mess he made. "K-Kuroko, I'm sorry," he said flatly with wide eyes. Then, it hit him. This could be the last chance he will have to talk to the phantom ever again. This could be the last time he'd ever see Kuroko out of a coffin.
"Wake up, please, get up!" he begged. Midorima was shoved out of the room and into the hallway as the medical staff poked and proded at the lifeless body.
"I'm so, so sorry," the greenette said, tears rolling down his cheeks. His shaking form slid down the door, and he let his head lean back. "I love you, Kuroko." And he wasn't lying. Kuroko was like the brother he never had. Midorima was glad that he didn't have a brother, because he'd probably treat him like shit, too.
"How can I make it up to you?" the bespectacled guy asked, looking at the tombstone for any form of an answer. In his ear, he swore he heard someone whisper, "keep living." He nearly jumped out of his skin until his eyes landed on Kagami Taiga, the shadow's last light.
"It's what he'd want you to do. Blaming yourself won't get you anywhere," the redhead said in a voice as hard as stone. Needless to say, he was pissed at Midorima for being a jerk to Kuroko, but as his eyes searched the broken boy, he couldn't help but feel a pang of empathy for him. Kagami, too, felt lost without his shadow sleeping by his side every morning and every night. Besides, the last Kuroko would want is for his friends to argue over him.
Taiga locked eyes with Midorima. They held nothing but sorrow and regret, while his own showed anger, sadness, and a small hint of understanding. He held out a strong hand, and the basketball prodigy hesitantly took it, letting Kagami pull him up off of the wet grass.
"You should be getting home before the weather gets any worse. This storm won't be lightening up any time soon," Midorima informed Taiga, pushing his glasses up a little. The red orbed boy rolled his eyes.
"Shut up and come with me," he ordered, and the other person complied, too tired to put up an argument.
The two walked past the cemetery gates, and with one last look at the gravestone he found little solace in, Midorima wiped off the tears that remained on his face and followed Kagami down the side walk with a dark aura engulfing the both of them. He let Taiga lead him wherever without asking any questions.
They arrived at a basketball court only a few blocks away from their last destination. Seirin was also a short distance away.
"Why are we here?" Midorima asked, talking for the first time since they left Kuroko's grave site. Kagami knowingly picked up a basketball that sat beside a metal bench and threw it to the three pointer.
"This is where me and Kuroko became 'friends'," the redhead explained, his eyes becoming misty.
"I understand, but again, why did you bring me here?"
"Shut up and play me," Kagami said. Midorima sighed and threw off the blazer of his suit. He loved to play ball in the rain as a child. He wouldn't have to stop for a drink of water as often, and the feeling of the drops on his heated skin always cooled him.
The two played one on one, neither keeping score. It didn't matter anyways; it would have been Midorima that won, even if the call was close more often than not in their street games. Kuroko had put Kagami at the top and helped him reach his full potential. There was no way that Taiga would have made it where he was without him. That's something he'll never be able to repay him for.
Kagami succeeded at a hook shot, one almost exactly like Mitobe's, and raised his fist into the air. In his blinding state of pride, he was about to ask Kuroko if he saw it, but he quickly remembered the beaten body of his best friend in a hospital bed and felt tears well up in his eyes.
To return the favor, Midorima stole the ball and made a shot from halfway across the court, scoring with ease like always. For a moment, it was as if nothing had changed. Both thought they were better than the other and did everything they could to prove it. Midorima nearly expected Kuroko to come up and jab both of them in the side for acting so concietedly. The greenette looked over at his opponent that was seated on a cold bench. Dark clouds slowly swirled in the sky above.
"Have you accepted your defeat already?" he joked in a dead tone that really wasn't for playing around. He took a seat beside Kagami and eyed him with a frown that had never left his face since the night of Kuroko's death.
"Where did you first meet him?" Kagami asked in what sounded more like a statement than a question. Midorima quickly knew what he was talking about and sighed.
"Actually, at the library near Teiko a few weeks before basketball tryouts was where we first met. He was too short to reach one of the books at the very top, so I grabbed it for him. It just so happened to be one of my favorite books, That Was Then, This Is Now by S.E. Hinton. That sparked a conversation about the author and her other works of art that he had never read. I recommended a couple of them to him, and a week later, we ran into eachother again at school. Kuroko claimed to have seen me around every now and then, but this was the first time I had ever noticed him at Teiko," Midorima explained with a sad smile. "He told me that he loved the books I recommended for him. I told him a few more that he may like along with some authors that he had never heard of with similar writing styles." Midorima paused for a moment, remembering his first memories with Kuroko.
"A couple of weeks later, we spotted eachother at basketball tryouts. Like last time, we discussed the books that I recommended along with the other authors I had him try out. Kuroko loved them all, just like I had. It appeared that we both had interests that expanded far beyond books and basketball, and before we knew it, we were talking about poets that we looked up to and a few famous musicians aswell. It was as if the gods destined us to become friends. Of course, I wasn't his first choice after Aomine came into the picture, and although that sparked a hint of jealousy in me, I let them be. We still met at the library often before he passed away," Midorima said. "I cannot believe that I told him he wasn't my friend, when truth be told, he was one of the few I had."
"There are a few things I'd like to take back, too," Kagami admitted, keeping his head hung low as he rested his elbows on his knees. "When we first met here, I underestimated him. I even called him weak. He really fucking showed me though." The redhead laughed, and a single drop of what could have been rain or possibly even a tear rolled down his cheek. Recalling these memories was starting to cut cords in the depths of his heart. Kuroko was no longer here to make memories with. All he had left of the boy was their past.
"He was different from the start, always way more determined than the rest of us. I was lucky that he chose me to be his light," Taiga concluded.
"You have an immense amount of talent and he was able to sense that from the start," Midorima explained. Kagami nodded contently. It was true that Kuroko had a nose for the weak and strong.
As the bad weather finally began to clear, they watched the sun set on the horizon. The beautiful hues of gold and orange painted the Tokyo sky, casting a warm glow on both of their faces. It was amazing. Midorima was the first to stand up. He brushed off the pants of his suit, though it didn't help much. The trousers were stained green from the grass he was kneeling in, and the dark clothing was soaked from the heavy rain they were cursed with most of the day. He picked up his new blazer and threw it over his shoulder.
"It's getting late," the teenager stated, "so I will be heading home. I'll see you around, Kagami."
"Uh, yeah, see ya..." Taiga said as he watched Midorima walk away from the court. Not another word was said, and Kagami remained in his seat. The fading sun toasted his skin, and he relished in the warm feeling.
On his walk back home, he passed the familiar gates to the cemetery he had visited. That felt like centuries ago, when in reality, it had only been a couple of hours. The past seemed so far away, including his past Kuroko. At the thought of his friend, he walked through the rows of tombstones until he arrived at his old phantom's. For the fifth time that day, he felt his vision become blurry, and he didn't make any move to hold back this time as he cried softly.
"You better save me a spot next to you up there," Kagami told Kuroko who he knew had heard him with a shaky smile. He picked up the roses that Midorima dropped earlier and sat them infront of his grave. The warm sunset that was quickly dying illuminated the light grey rock. Kagami gave the tombstone a small fist bump as a tear fell onto it.
"So long, Kuroko."