I do not own Naruto.
More KakaObiRin. Angst. Spoilers for Kakashi Gaiden.
Remembering
challenge: remembering
Kakashi stood, the wind softly blowing the silver strands of hair out of his eye, only to make it fall right back into place a second later. Still, he didn't move to push the hair back forcibly, nor did he move at all, really. His one exposed eye kept its steady gaze on the name written in the stone.
Uchiha Obito
"…you're full of crap, asshole," you growl, throwing another snowball in my direction. Rin's laughter echoes down to us, but neither of us look up at her.
"That doesn't change the fact you can't throw for shit." I swallow a curse, not wanting to lower myself to your level.
You take the bait so easily. I love taunting you, the words coming so effortlessly to my lips, and you react perfectly. I have you mapped out perfectly, your expression, your voice, your actions, then my reaction—
Or not. I don't expect the face full of ice I get a second later.
It still hurt to think of him, of that simple, yet maybe not so simple (is anyone simple?), soul that expired that day in the woods. That idiot that never really matched up, never really could, still haunted the man. In his dreams he'd imagine that Obito was alive, that his red eyes could look into Kakashis', when Kakashi could gaze at him back evenly.
And then Rin would wrap her arms around them both.
"Relax. It's not like we're having sex…" I whisper these words into your ear, and I pull you closer. I hear that whine in the back of your throat, but I ignore it.
You can't hate this when I'm enjoying it so much, can you?
"Kakashi," you groan, and you don't sound like you're enjoying it. Why? Would you rather be held by Obito, by that half-wit monkey!
I see the way you look at him, that soft glint in your eyes. I don't even need to see the way he looks that you to know that he's completely infatuated with you. Well, he won't have you, not while I want you.
"Kakashi, stop it," you murmur, sounding a little more firm. With her small, thick fingers you're trying to pull your shirt down, and push my hand away. Why should I? I bet you'd let Obito do it.
I won't lose to him.
He hadn't deserved her. She'd been beautiful, in her own plain way, and she'd been careful when no one else cared to. He'd taken advantage of this, of her feelings towards him.
She'd let him touch her; because she trusted him, because she thought he'd never hurt her. Even when he…
He didn't want to think about it.
I look up at you, and you look down at me, and I hate that look on your face. You're looking at me like I'm sick, like I'm trash, like I'm something disgusting you want to step on. How dare you? You're the worthless one, not me!
Not me.
Meanwhile Rin is just lying there, not looking at anyone, not me, but at least not at you either. See, she doesn't go to you, either.
"What . . . what did you do to her?" you hiss, your voice cracking dangerous, as if you're holding back. Don't hold back, I can take whatever you shelve out.
"Nothing she didn't want done."
Obito had refused to talk to him for weeks, he remembered. Rin had just avoided the two of them, only keeping company with Yondaime in all that time. Even though on the surface it had been about her, it really wasn't, and Kakashi realized this now. Obito and him had made it about them, and had stolen Rin's pain from her.
Even so, Rin had loved them, no matter what, it seemed.
"I'll kill you!" he yelled, rushing at me. I dodged to the right, and stuck out my foot. He fell right over, and before he could lift himself off the dirt, I straddled his hips. I hadn't planned on hurting him, not really, but the blood pounding my ears won't let me stop.
I hit the back his head with my fist, and I hear the muffled groan below me. Again and again I hit him, until my fist aches.
Then, leaning over slowly, loving the fact his mouth must be full of dirt, I whisper teasingly in his ear. "Like you could, Uchiha."
"Kakashi!" I turn at your voice. "Oh my god, Obito! What . . . what are you doing, Kakashi?" I roll off my teammate, but I don't say or do anything as you turn Obito over onto his back. Just like I thought, his face is brown with dirt, and he seems to have passed out.
Then you look at me, but not like I thought you would. You don't look angry or anything. You just look sad, maybe even verging on pitying.
You pity me.
Kakashi remembered the forced apology that one glance had stolen from him. He was grateful now Rin managed it. Obito had only punched him in the nose once for it, too. Probably at Rin's insistence.
Did it even matter anymore? Obito was gone, Rin had disappeared, and did these memories of mistakes and childhood and friendship mean a damn thing? They only compelled Kakashi to visit this same spot every day, staring at his name until he wished he were blind.
She holds my hand, her face mostly covered by a large green hood. I can barely make out those eyes, staring calmly out at me even now. Even at farewell.
"You don't have to leave, y'know," I whisper, half-hoping someone will hear despite it all. Then it won't be my fault if she can't go; she can't blame me.
She shakes her head at me. "Yes, I do. This village isn't the place for me. This world of men isn't a place for me. All your sex seems to care about is killing, and killing, and killing. What Konohagakure needs is a female Hokage, but…I don't know if I'll live to see one in my lifetime."
I frown. She's starting again. Ever since you died, it's like she's been blaming each and every man for your passing. I guess that gives her an excuse to not blame herself. "Of course this is the place for you. Where else could you go?"
She doesn't answer, but I know. It's not a place she can describe in simple things like words. You can't describe perfect, it just is.
"Don't forget, Kakashi. Whatever you do." She moves forward clumsily, and presses a soft, aching kiss against my lips.
I miss her already. I miss you still.
Kakashi remembered. He kept visiting that name, and at night when the only noises were the faint howling of wild creatures in the distance, he would allow himself to pretend that his bed is warm, and that his life is blissful.
I push him down on the snow, and I'm blinded momentarily by the flurries of snow that fly up into my face. Then your arms are around me, and I'm falling too.
We lay there, a thin layer of white blanket covering us. All is good and fine, with you and Obito next to me, freezing in the snow.
It's also just a memory.
