I have as much of a chance of having a dragon in my backyard as owning Warriors. But you don't know if I do have a Dragon in my backyard or not.
Warning this is a one shot so if you don't like those don't read this,...but you already clicked on it and why would you click on it if you weren't going to read it? You might as well read it.
That's it they're all insane, the dead squirrel over there has more IQ than them all combined, Tigerclaw thought as he looked around him suddenly realising that he was surrounded by the idiots that are called Thunderclan. Letting a kittypet into the clan was bad enough, he only stomached Firepaw because it was funny being able to imagine him being pushed into the river but this was too far.
They were making him a warrior for surviving his first battle, his first battle. He had like three moons of training. Firepaw probably only survived because the Shadowclan warriors thought he was a rock, he certainly has the brain and skill of one and that's an insult to the rock.
"I name you Fireheart and here's this shiny gold metal for your bravery." Bluestar said giving a large gold metal that had the words, For being awesome, engraved on them. O my god, he fought in one battle Tigerclaw had fought in more than he could count and what did he get, a bunch of scars and a pat on the back.
"And you can have that big squirrel over there." That was it, he could exept becoming a warrior, even forget the medal but that was his fat squirrel.
"Wait you're letting Firefart, sorry Fireheart have the squirrel. He survived one battle and you've already made him a warrior and gave him a medal." he called out. Most looked at him like he was crazy others were looking at the butterfly that had landed on the rock near him. They have the attention span of a goldfish, he thought rolling his eyes, wait what's a goldfish?
"You're right Tigerclaw," Bluestar said shaking her head, " We should make him deputy!"
"WHAT! I'm deputy, you can't give it to that buffoon, the clan will be destroyed in five seconds! He can't even lead his tail to the dirt place and it's attached to him!" he yelled.
"You're just jealous!" Graystripe said hissing.
"Says the talking lump of fur, I didn't even know that you could talk you only ever eat. And what am I supposed to be jealous of!" he said looking at Firefart who was puffing out his chest importantly. That's the person they want to be deputy!
"At least I'm not evil!" said the walking train wreck, "You killed Redtail!"
"Yes! Finally!" he said at the gasps, "Don't acted so surprised, I've been dropping hints like crazy! Seriously how many times does a guy have to cackle maniacally before someone points out the obvious! Kitty breath over there's brain is the size of an atom and even he figured it out!"
"Tigerclaw how could you?!" Bluestar cried while everyone else was still trying to remember what a brain was. Must…...resist….urge….to…...facepalm. He failed.
"How could I?! From the moment I was apprenticed you looked at me like I was made of pure evil! And were I would have been punished for moons golden boy over here would get a pat on the back and a mouse!"
"I'm not even sure that I want to lead you all anymore! They clan couldn't take over the forest even if it was begged to."
"Fireheart would do a better job then you ever had!" someone shouted causing others to call insults at him.
"Well good luck with that! I'm out!" he told them walking out of camp only to sit by to out side of the camp wall and count. Suddenly there was an explosion behind him. Correction the clan will be destroyed in 4.5 seconds if he's deputy.