Fearful Touch, an evangelion fanfic

Summary: A story in the bathroom leads to an interpretation in the classroom.

Disclaimer: This story is based on the anime and manga of Neon Genesis Evangelion and I make no money off of this story.

Edit: Okay, seems to muck up all the spacings but I've re-done this story and if you see spacing errors in other people's or your own stories then the only way to fix it is to edit the document when it has been uploaded on in the edit/preview section. Also, it doesn't allow double spacing so you're going to have to fill it in like I have which is very frustrating!

'These days, I keep finding myself drawn to him...

To Kaworu...'

Shinji Ikari, a fourteen year old boy, was currently being dragged by one of his school mates, Touji Suzuhara, while Kesuke Aida and Kaworu Nagisa walked behind him, to one of their school's bathrooms. Touji and Kensuke were wearing stupid grins while Kaworu just had his passive smile and Shinji was looking at all three of them in confusion.

"Aww, don't worry Shinji. It's not like we're going to implant a computer chip in you're brain." Kensuke chuckled. Touji stared back at Shinji when they arrived outside the bathroom on the fourth floor.

"Yeah, we just want to show you somethin'." Was all the warning the brunette Eva pilot got before being thrown into the tiled floor of the bathroom. Shinji stared up at the ceiling for a moment before looking around.

"Wait! This is the GIRLS bathroom!" Shinji warned his friends but the look on their faces told him they already knew before they walked in past him. "What are we doing in the girls room?"

'At first, I was scared. I didn't know what to think...'

"Manga?" Shinji looked with suspision into the duffel bag that Touji hauled out of one of the stalls.

"Not just any old manga." Kensuke grabbed one of the paperbacks and showed Shinji the cover.

"W-What!?" The brunette fell backwards at the sight. "S-Sex!?" Touji and Kensuke both clamped their hands over Shinji's mouth and told him to be quiet. Kaworu, ignoring his friend's antics, picked up a book and looked at the cover for a moment before giving a small laugh.

"Huh?" The light glared off of Kensuke's glasses as he turned around to face the silver haired Eva pilot.

"What's so funny?" Touji glared. Kaworu just smiled and shook his head before opening the book, the cover and its contents hidden from view.

"Where did you get all of them?" Shinji stared with open eyes at the black bag.

"I found it in a box with all of my Mum's things." Kensuke smiled before rifling through the bag. "This one," He held up a book with an army man and woman on the front. "Is my favourite!" Touji laughed before he pulled out a book with a school girl on the front. He then pulled out a book with a black haired girl in a skimpy blue, white and red kimono while a man with silver hair and a head band held her to his chest. "Go wild, Shinji." Touji spoke to which Kaworu gave another small mysterious laugh.

The book was thrown to Shinji who inspected the cover for a while and felt his face get hot. Carefully opening the book, Shinji felt as though something large and nasty would jump out of the pages and eat him but nothing happened.

He started to read.

'All of these feelings. I've never felt them before...'

The girl's name was Sasuke and she worked in a hostess house in what Shinji guessed as a modern Edo period of Japan. The silver haired man held the name Kakashi. Shinji was only nearing his ump-teenth page when he once again screamed.

"W-What the hell!?" Shinji dropped the book. Touji stopped giggling to himself and Kensuke wiped the drool from his mouth as they both stared at him in suprise. Kaworu gave him a knowing smile, his red eyes filled with mirth. "It... Its a guy!?" The brunette's face was bright red.

"... What!?" His two classmates yelled. Touji picked up the book and flipped through the pages before screaming and threw the book to Kensuke who immediately dropped into the bag.

"Holy shit! He's right!" The black haired jock held an arm in front of his face as a shield. Kaworu's laughter rang out through the tiled bathroom. Shinji shivered and felt his face grow hotter at the sound and gulped. "You knew!" Touji pointed an accusing finger at the silver haired boy.

"Oh?" Kaworu smiled mysteriously. Kensuke picked up another random book and flipped through the pages before dropping it with a yell.

"Another one!" He rushed through the books and found, out of the even twenty in the bag, only four were not gay manga. "Mom... Mom was into this!?" To which Touji promptly covered his ears and screamed bloody murder. Kaworu gave a small laugh and showed the cover of the book he was reading.

'I'm so confuesed.'

At first it looked like an elder teen with short orange hair and wearing a black yukata was holding onto a girl with black hair that barely reached her shoulders glasses. She wore a blue and white ceremonial robe but with closer inspection the other three were able to see that it was a male being held by the sword wielder.

This prompted Shinji to stare at the girl on the cover of the book that was reading and found that the face no longer held any resemblance to the female one he thought was there a mere moment ago. Kensuke and Touji were still stareing at the book in Kaworu's hands with their jaws hanging. Kaworu then twisted the book around so they were stareing, instead, at the page the red eyed boy was currently on.

The teen with orange hair had his black yukata open at the front and was kneeling down while saying the name 'Ishida' as he held the naked black haired boy above him and intimatly touching his partner's dick. The next page showed Ishida being positioned over the sword wielder before being pulled down onto the other's dick.

Kensuke and Touji read the scenes twice before realising what they were doing and jumped back from Kaworu and his mirth-filled eyes. Shinji was still red.

"N... No way..." They both whispered. The bell rang and they hurridly, and awkardly, packed the books away and headed off to class.

'And then... he said something to me...'

During the lesson, Shinji , Kensuke and Touji said nothing and kept their heads down, out of anyone's sight. Kaworu sat through the class as he always did. Red eyes on the teacher and passive smile ever present. At the end of class, after everyone had done their cleaning chores, Kensuke and Touji ran off home.

"Shinji." The brunette turned and came face to face with the silver haired Eva pilot. Shinji jumped back a foot his blush still in full force. "Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. Are you alright?" Kaworu spoke softly. Shinji gave an awkard smile and nodded. "Ah, good. I didn't want you to endure any pain on my behalf."

"Ah, no. I'm fine. Is there something you wanted to talk about?" Kaworu's eyes looked past Shinji and out the window behind him. The brunette turned and saw Touji half-run, half-hop, out and away from the school.

"I think that things will become normal again tommorrow, do you agree?"

"Y-Yeah. Um, I'm sure that we'll forget it soon..."

"You haven't forgotten, have you?" Shinji blushed harder. "You are still red. Were you upset? Seeing two men together that is."

"NO!" Shinji yelled and held his hands up. "N-No... it isn't that... I, umm... I was just..."

"Shocked?"

"Yeah! Umm, that. Shocked." Shinji gave another strangeld laugh.

"Ah. So you wouldn't mind?" Kaworu stared at him with un-readable eyes.

"Mind?"

'I felt more confuesed then I was to start with...'

"A male partner. Being with a male partner." Shinji swallowed and looked away.

"... I don't know..." The brunette fumbled with the strap of his bag.

"Hm. I'll see you tommorrow, Shinji."

"Oh! Yeah.. see you." He waved goodbye and Kaworu waved back before leaving. Shinji grabbed hold of the closest desk and leaned on it, his face too hot and his hands shaking.

'Mother... What should I do...?

What should I do?!'

Kaworu was right. Kensuke and Touji had forgotten about what had happened yesterday and were acting like nothing along those lines had ever happened to them. Shinji still remembered it in the back of his mind but was able to stay calm and go along and soon it was out of his mind completly.

Lunch went by and nothing that had to do with yesterday was brought up. The last class came up and went by and Touji went to Kensuke's to play video games. Shinji finished off a work sheet before packing his books away, by which only a very people were still around.

"Shinji."

"Hmm?" The brunette turned to see Kaworu approach him.

"Have you forgotten?" Shinji stared at his friend in confusion. Then he remembered yesterday; 'You haven't forgotten, have you?' he had said. Shinji blushed deep red and the images of Sasuke and Kakashi and the book Kaworu was reading bombarded his mind. "Ah. You remember."

Kaworu closed the space between them and leaned into the the left side of Shinji's neck.

"So do I." He whispered heatedly before licking the smaller boy's ear. Shinji gasped and tried to back away but was stopped with a hand on his right hip. He was pulled closer and his chest contracted as his ear was nipped. The hand on his hip moved up to on the back of his neck, lips moving to caress the side. The gentle movements made him lax and his eyes closed.

Slowly stepping forward, Kaworu manuvered Shinji up against the wall. Clamping his mouth onto a point on Shinji's neck, where he knew everyone could see, Kaworu gently nibbled on the skin, licking it at random points. He used his right hand to hold onto the smaller's hip as he pushed himslef closer on to the brunette.

Silver hair was in Shinji's left eye so he opened his right one and gasped as a harsher nip attacked his neck, causing him to automatically move his head away from the lips claiming him, giving more room for Kaworu to move over him.

Shinji quietly whimpered as the hand on his hip started to ghost up his stomach, then his chest, before unbottoning his school shit in smooth movements. The shirt was pulled out of his pants and sneaked under his black singlet top, long, pale fingers, drawing unknown patterns across his small belly.

Kaworu started to kiss his way up the other's neck and nipped on the under side of Shinji's chin before firmly pressing his lips onto the brunette's. Shinji's body became stiff and his eyes shot open and stared into lidded, blazing eyes. His ears were red and so was all of his neck as Shinji's blush spread.

Kaworu moved his lips gently over the brunette's and Shinji stared to relax, his eyelids dropping halfway. They stared at each other as Kaworu's hand moved up further and started to trace the smaller's chest, a pinky moveing in circles around a pink nipple.

Shinji groaned lightly. Kaworu stopped kissing the brunette and pulled away slightly. He licked his lips before plunging his tongue into Shinji's mouth with heated abandon. A pale hand left his chest and clawed at his pants, movements hurried and desperate. Black pants hung loose and a belt lay open as the hand now worked to undo the button and zipper.

Black cloth fell to his ankles and Shinji yelled in pleasure as long fingers twined around his erection and massaged the heated flesh. Kaworu growled into Shinji's mouth before the hand left him. The red eyed boy gave the other a quick few strokes before the hand left him.

Kaworu pushed Shinji's shirt off and lifted the back top underneath to his neck before the silver haired boy started kissing the smaller's chest Shinji gasped and hunched over as Kaworu's lips sent shocks and explosions through his nerves. Kisses decorated his chest before a feather-light lick graced his left nipple and then kisses were being planted around his stomach. A lick to his navel before a kiss to his thigh and a moan from above before a growl rumbled from below.

"Kaworu!" Shinji gasped and his right hand shot out to the silver locks below him as a kiss was planted to his slit. Kaworu held onto the back of the brunette's thighs as he kissed along the length of his lover.

"Shinji..." Pale lips whispered lustfully before taking in the rosy flesh of the brunette's erection. The hand in his hair gripped tighter and a growl vibrated through his chest and into the dick in his mouth as a feeling of possesion grasped him. Shinji gasped and writhed underneath the touch of his best friend and felt his legs lose their strength and rely solely on the hands on the back of his thighs to keep him up.

Kaworu looked up and saw Shinji covered in droplets of sweat and panting. His eyes grew feral and his grip on the smaller boy's thighs tightend as he swallowed. Shinji let loose a strangled scream as he arched backwards into the glass of the window. Kaworu growled again and swallowed once more, succusfully drawing a thick, white, liquid. Sucking out what was left, he allowed Shinji's now flaccid dick to fall from his lips.

The brunette was carefully lowered down onto the other's lap. Kaworu undid his pants and pulled out his erection and spat the liquid from his mouth onto his palm before rubbing it on and all over his throbbing dick. Licking three of his fingers, Kaworu held Shinji above him and slipped one finger in without the smaller boy noticing.

Pulling the finger in and out for a while, Kaworu kissed Shinji before slipping in the other finger. His partner gasped and squirmed for a second before settling down and relaxing. When Kaworu started streatching him, Shinji let out little groans. The two fingers streatched him and, before the brunette could relax, Kaworu slipped in a third finger.

Shinji gave a strangled cry. He grabbed hold of his lover and pulled his head to his chest, his body stiff and uncomfortable. Kaworu panted and nipped at the chest he found himself held to. The warm skin flushed pink under his ministrations. The muscle around his three fingers contracted and fought against him.

The fingers worked themselves in and out, slick with Shinji's fluids. Kaworu's hips moved and he started rubbing his erection against Shinji's and, with a harsh nip to his chest, the brunette sighed as the invading fingers left him but cringed when Kaworu lifted him up and placed the brunette over and on top of the touch of his cock.

Kaworu held Shinji's hips and moved his head so he could see his partner's face before brutally yanking the smaller down, his erection slipping passed stretched muscle to the hilt. Shinji screamed and his nails dug deep into his lover's skin. Kaworu growled at the sight of the smaller's pain ridden face and gripped the hips atop of him harder.

"Shinji..." The silver haired boy whispered visciously. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to hurt you..." His hips twitched constantly. "I'm sorry, Shinji..."

"Kaworu..." Tears rolled down Shinji's face. "Kaworu..." The words sent shivers down the larger boy's back and his erection twitched with need. "Kaworu..." Said boy lifted Shinji up a few inches and started to thrust inside of him. The smaller of the two bit his lip as the tears became heavy and sobs wracked at his throat. Shinji's nails clawed and scratched pale skin, causing red welts to form.

Kaworu again pulled the brunette down and wrapped his pale arms around a thin waist, holding the smaller still. They stayed, unmoving, in each other's arms, listening to the themselves panting for breath and both of their bodies continued to shake. Kaworu was filled with lust and Shinji still had tears trailing down his cheeks. Kaworu licked away the tears and buried his face under his lover's chin.

"Shinji..." The red eyed boy gasped. He looked up into brown eyes that stared down at him with adoration.

"I'm... I'm alright..." Shinji whispered.

"Is it feeling better? The pain, I mean. Is the pain fading away?"

"Y-Yeah..." The feral look in Kaworu's eyes faded slightly and he leaned up to kiss the other.

"I love you, Shinji Ikari." Shinji gaped at the taller boy and the blush on his cheeks deepend before lips pressed themselves to his own. The brunette relaxed into the loving kiss and moaned when he felt Kaworu move inside of him.

"Kaworu..." Shinji moaned. The other lifted him and continued to thrust lightly but swiftly inside of him. The pain had greatly decreased and Shinji started to move along with his lover's movements. Kaworu rained kisses along Shinji's neck. Both fourteen year old boys continued to move together as pleasure built up and soon Kaworu was gaining speed, his grip tightening and his breathing growing heavier.

Shinji yelled out his partner's name as he felt himself release for the second time that afternoon after feeling the essence of Kaworu spill and coat his inner walls in bliss. Shinji groaned one last time before falling forward and landed against his lover's chest. Kaworu gave a soft laugh and hugged the smaller boy to him.

"I think I was born to meet you, Shinji Ikari." He petted the brunette's sweat-slick hair before kissing his forhead. The two sat their for minutes on end. When Shinji felt strong enough to move again, he tried to sit up but was pulled back down to the pale chest. He looked up to glowing red eyes and saw Kaworu's usual passive smile that held s more intimate meaning. Shinji smiled back before hugging the taller boy to him.

"I love you too, Kaworu Nagisa." Kaworu grinned and kissed his forhead again. "Don't leave me... Please..."

'An Angel... He was an Angel... and I killed him...'

"Shinji..."