Previously known as 'Birthday candles' - Last sunset has be revised and derailed from it's originally planned ending to be completed in time for a 30 day writing challenge. Though I believe for the better.
This is every chapter you've seen prior(With a few minor literary adjustments) if you've been following from the beginning, as well as a few new ones. all compiled into one long one.
Reviews are much much appreciated, as I worked hard on this one and feel very proud of how it turned out. And please let me know if you cried - as that was the challenge I put myself to ;)
Thank you for reading.
Kuroshitsuji (c) Yana Toboso
Part One
Pandora public high school was a prestigious school, full of successful students of all stereotypes and cliques. The boys and girls who went there were generally happy, always having bright smiles on their faces and joking around.
During classes most students laughed at the kind teachers jokes, were well caught up with the work, and got good grades to bring home to proud parents.
In the school, however, a navy haired boy was none of these things. During morning, lunch, between classes, and after school, he tried to remain as far away from anyone as possible. Always in the back of the classroom or on the back table of the library.
He did not have parents to bring home good report cards too… If he ever got any.
He was small, only 5'1", so it was easy for him to slip under the table in the library. Past the fifth bookshelf, slide over the beanbag chair, and you were basically invisible to the librarian's line of sight.
"Ciel Alexander Phantomhive, is there a reason you're skipping 4th period on this beautiful fall day, to sit cold and cramped under there? Is that book there really that interesting?"
But of course…even if the librarian couldn't see you, that didn't really mean the vice-principle couldn't…
"I find Ulysses by James Joyce to be far more interesting and, only half as long as sitting in my history class, Miss Grey."
Miss Grey was quite a beautiful woman, she was young, or at least looked so, with long blonde hair down to her waist. The ends seemed straw-like however, possibly from too much bleach and lack of conditioner.
Her eyes were a deep mahogany brown, like highly polished wood. She was petite, most of the students at the school easily surpassed her in height. It made for slight amusement when she was chewing some of the taller boys out, though at the same time it made her much easier to talk to.
"Well that's a bit of a stretch don't you think? I haven't had very much to do today, so this is almost entertaining. Now, why don't you come out from underneath that table and why don't we take a little stroll."
A 'stroll' was Miss Grey's way of saying 'Let's go to the office so we can reprimand at you some and send you right back to class with a fresh new detention slip'. Honestly Ciel didn't know why detention was supposed to be a punishment. During lunch, he got to sit in a quiet room alone, rather than a loud courtyard alone.
"Do you know how many times you've skipped class now?"
"This week in particular? Two. Counting this one."
"This school year thus far; eight times, Ciel. Four of which have been this month. And they keep getting more frequent."
Miss Grey and the boy walked through the campus. The ground was littered with freshly fallen maple leaves, though the janitors had swept them up just that morning.
Their 'stroll' ended at the office door. It was painted in a sky blue colour, odd seeing as that wasn't even close to their school colors of red and orange. Something about the color making students feel happier...Aside from the fact no one was happy when going to the office; He'd thought it was yellow that made people happy. Not blue. Not only that, but the paint was peeling away at the corners of the building, to reveal the old modest white underneath. He liked to think of it more as a show of how shitty the painter they hired was.
As they stepped into the lady's office, she shut the timber door, the glass panes rattling.
"So, what are we going to do with you, Phantomhive? We can't keep making exceptions to the rules just because of your… Well…"
She trailed off and gave a sigh, before straightening her long blonde hair, her bright crimson lips twitching into a frown. "We do care about you as a student, Ciel."
"And want my family's money…" The boy interrupted under his breath, which only made the girl frown more.
"If that was the case we would let you continue to skip classes and, keep sending you to detention as a result."
"Like you've been doing for the entire school year?" Ciel remarked, causing the woman to shoot him another angry or annoyed look. However she continued.
"…But we do care, so that's why I've decided to schedule you for tutoring. If you are refusing to learn in a normal school environment, we'll have to attempt to see if you will learn what you need in life on your own time. "
'What you'll need to know in life…'
Bull. Aside from the fact that everyone forgets what they learn in highschool to begin with, they knew just as well as him that he had no future. He had been doomed by fate already.
"And don't worry, we've already called and scheduled appointments with your grandparents, so no need to bring home any papers to sign.
Now, why don't we try to get you back to class before it's over. You can consider that punishment enough."
And before Ciel knew what to say or do, he was pushed down the school hallway with a sealed envelope to bring home… Which he most certainly wouldn't.
A tutor huh? Tutors made him think of ugly old hags with those stereotypical witch's moles on their faces.
Already he had intentions of locking himself in the best bathroom in his house with a bag of chips and his laptop, as well as his Ipad in case his grandparents got smart enough to unplug the internet in an attempt to get him to come out.
He made his way to his locker, there was only about ten minutes of class left anyways. No reason to go to it now.
The small boy sat on his knees and put in the combination to his bottom locker with practiced ease. It seemed the school board was nice enough to realize he had trouble reaching into the back of those top lockers like he had as a freshman.
He pushed his binders to the side of his locker and slid his hardback copy of 'Ulysses' in, before crinkling up the envelope and tossing it to the back, where most of his detention slips and homework had ended up.
He hesitated closing the locker, he was curious about the content of the letter. So he reached his hand back and pulled the envelope back onto his lap.
He stared at it a moment before ripping the top open and pulling out the now crumpled folded slip of paper inside.
He unfolded it and quickly read the text over. It had the information about the tutor in it and it surprised him to find out it was another student from the school…
Sebastian Michaelis. A senior.
Now he was quite surprised. The lanky raven haired senior was someone who surely didn't look like he was one to get good grades.
He dressed quite punkish actually, normally in lots of leather and hung out with that crowd that Ciel would normally see sitting in the office, the ones with the bright flaming red hair and piercings.
Maybe he would stay to see how who the girls in his classes nicknamed 'tall dark and handsome' acted first; before locking himself in the bathroom…
Part Two
A slender, dark haired man stepped up to the rounded cement steps to the front door of the imposing manor. He pulled one hand from his black leather jacket and tapped on the thick wooden door with a bare knuckle.
His crimson eyes scanned the small paper in his hand the school board had given him.
'Hello, I'm the student tutor for a Ciel Phantomhive?'
He repeated over in his head in preparation for when the door was answered.
From inside the house the youngest resident stirred from his spot lying lifelessly on the largest couch in the den area. He sighed, blinking his bright blue eyes from their sudden soreness caused by staring at an Ipad screen too long.
The boy made a few taps, pausing his game of Angry Birds - he found the game to be the saddest form of time wasting in the world, although also one of the most addicting - and set the tablet down onto the couch before standing to go get the door.
He walked past a series of life support equipment that sat against one wall of the room, half rolling his eyes at it. He was supposed to be wearing it, obviously, however what was the use? Sure, he could put it on and sit around like a vegetable all day, but what good would it do apart from keep him alive to suffer a day longer? Like hell did he want that.
He shook his head to himself and crossed the entrance hall, quieting and shooing the dog who was now barking relentlessly at the door before unlocking and opening it.
Sebastian lowered his eyes to the child, jolted from his thoughts and surprised to see someone so young. He cleared his throat once before finally speaking.
"Oh, hello, is there an adult home that I can speak to?"
He asked, crouching down a bit to meet eye-level with the other male. The child seemed to find this insulting; he could tell by the look on his pale rounded face.
He received no answer.
"Uh…Is there a Ciel Phantomhive here?"
He asked again, taken aback as the child rolled his eyes and, he soon realized that he was not a child at all.
"I know I'm not the most sociable person, but you should at least know what I look like if we go to the same school."
Ciel mumbled with a sigh, moving away from the door to allow the man inside and instructing him to remove his shoes with a series of flippant gestures and made no attempt to stop his large white dog from sniffing the newcomer in all this leathered glory.
"You haven't hardly made it past the front door and you've already insulted me. I can see how much I'm going to enjoy this already."
Sebastian couldn't help but smirk at this comment, though quickly hid it, his expression quickly changing back to normal. He let the dog sniff his shoes and hands, though made no other movements towards it seeing as, if asked, he wouldn't hesitate to kindly rant on his hatred for the canine species.
"My apologies. I'll try to be more sensitive from now on. …I'll try to start over. What an adorable dog…thing…you have here. What's its name?"
"Good. …As for the dog, you and he share a first name. His name is Sebastian, Alexander, Vincent, William, Phillip, Phantomhive."
The navy haired boy answered with no hesitation in his words from trying to remember all the names. Sebastian instantly raised an eyebrow at the smaller male.
"That's quite the verbose name for a dog don't you think?"
He asked, still oddly eyeing the boy. Already he was convinced that this boy was the most strange and profound person he'd ever met.
Ciel only shrugged, stretching and making his way back into the den to return to his game.
"I was only five when I named him you know. I think it's pretty impressive considering I couldn't properly pronounce any of them."
Sebastian gave a soft nod and an 'ah' before watching the boy sink back into the couch and pull the ipad up to his face and continue his game.
He stiffened slightly, standing there awkwardly and clearing his throat once more.
"Just so you know - I have no intentions of learning from you, or anyone for that matter. Your being here is useless and you can go home to if you want. We'll still give your damned money for coming out."
"Oh? Is that so?"
Sebastian answered with a smothered chuckle. Stepping to the other end of the couch from the boy. He watched his with intent crimson eyes, studying his facial expressions as he played his game and listening to the sound it gave off as he finished a level.
Ciel nodded sometime in the middle of his game, eyes not moving from the screen.
"I finished high school online…But I couldn't get a diploma, and I didn't want to settle for a GED back then, because I figured it would be harder to work with. Sort of useless to bother putting effort into getting an anything now, you know?"
The black haired man nodded in understanding, though he clearly understood very little of what was just said.
He had heard it all in his two years of tutoring, but this excuse seemed nearly legit.
"Then I'll tell you what…if you pass the math test tomorrow, then I won't even attempt to teach you. That seems like a fair deal, yeah?"
"How do you know my year has a math test tomorrow? Been perving on sophomore girls?"
Sebastian raised an eyebrow again before sighing. He supposed that was a 'yes, that deal will be fine…'
...
The next morning Ciel didn't bother coming in early. Math wasn't until the third period anyway.
If it wasn't for the stupid tutoring crap he wouldn't have gone today, having been too shaken up frustrated by the yellowing of his skin.
But in the end suffering from heat via an oversized hoodie proved to be a fair trade for successfully hiding the signs of his illness.
When he arrived at the school, he knew the routine. Straight to the office for a late pass.
This was something that was not new to him in any way. In fact he came in late nearly three times a week.
He stuffed the paper into his hoodies pocket as soon as the office aide handed it to him and turned to leave. He didn't get far past the door before Miss Grey spotted him in the hallway to his locker.
"Oh~ Phantomhive~"
She said in a sing-song voice, stopping a few feet in front of him and giving a bright and unnervingly happy smile. He could tell by the bright gleam in her eye she was secretly plotting something.
"The tutor came by yesterday right? Mr. Michaelis is quite the charmer isn't he? I'm sure if you were a little older and he shared your sexual orientations you and him would make a-"
Ciels eyes widened as he brought a finger to his lips in the classic 'Shush' motion.
He had gotten in trouble a while back when he was in his first year for kissing his boyfriend at the time behind the school. He was just thankful it had been Miss Grey who had found out. As it appeared she supported homosexuality and let them off easy.
However he still had no intentions of announcing it to the world, and thankfully his blonde haired blue eyed lover had left for Australia before anyone found out about them.
She shut up pretty quickly and gave a soft chuckle.
"I don't want to talk about my gender preferences with my school's vice-principal right now. And might I remind you I won't be around long enough for a relationship."
This made the girl frown, eyes filling with the slightest hint of sadness.
"How long did they say since your last visit?"
Ciel shrugged, he normally drowned out the doctors words.
"He said about a month before my birthday so,Four months at best? Hell, I could very well drop dead today."
"Why are you here then? Shouldn't you be at home with your family? Resting?"
The boy snorted with laughter at this, shifting his book bag and beginning down the hall to his locker again.
"If I'm going to go, my last days will not be taken up by sitting in hospital beds, nor while being sedated with my stomach being ripped open by a doctor who has no idea what he's doing."
Part Three
Well then, Phantomhive?" the raven haired man by the name of Sebastian questioned as he finally became fed up enough about being ignored that he reached over to pull the handheld gaming system from the younger boys face. The boy seemed quite annoyed by this, to say the least.
"Well then, what?" He retorted in a mocking tone, turning off the game none the less before bringing his knees to his chest, though obviously in a bit of pain from this action. Sebastian however not catching notice of this.
"I've asked you five times now what your score on the test was. You're stalling, aren't you?"
"Of course not. I passed just fine. If you want proof I put it on the table for you, I thought you'd have been observant enough to see it by now, but I guess I underestimated you." Ciel muttered, giving a sigh of his own now and closing his eyes, nearly falling asleep just like that. However after taking about ten minutes to look over the tests score and observing the room more closely out of spite for the words said to him Sebastian spoke again, snapping Ciel out of his tired state.
"So, what's with all the oxygen tanks and equipment in the corner?" The blue haired boy frowned at this, too, obviously not pleased. This left Sebastian to re-think if what he just asked.
"It's for me, idiot. You really don't pay attention to anything at all, do you?" The boy sighed, sitting up slowly and running a hand through his hair. Suddenly feeling obliged to explain.
"I have a stomach cancer called Adenocarcinoma. It's not rare, or really that fatal in early stages. However, I'm currently far from being in the early stages of it. " Now Sebastian, just as anyone else would be upon hearing someone basically state they were letting themselves die in such a way, was quite shocked. The red eyed man didn't know how to respond to this, as it seemed like utter madness and blasphemy.
"…Then shouldn't you be hooked up to them?" He finally let the words spill out, concern filling his features.
"Why would I? I've already had enough out of life. I've been born into a rich family and become owner to a large company, have watched my immediate family all pass away, been in love once as well as heartbroken all the same…That's all life is, isn't it? Love, family, money, fame…I've had it all, I don't want it anymore." The boy paused, giving a small smile before continuing, as the other male that sat before him on the couch seemed to gain understanding to what he was saying.
"So to answer your question, the equipment in the corner is suppose to help extend my life for a few more days, and I won't do it."
This shut Sebastian right up. He wanted to laugh, the view this boy had on life was…Well it was sad. Possibly the saddest he had ever heard. Sure there were people, fakes or not, who felt their life to be so horrible and pitiful that they would hurt themselves, make suicide attempts, dress in depressing clothing and embrace anything that had to do with death and pain. But this boy was just…Indifferent, accepting, and utterly tired of having everything. He sounded like a raging absurdist.
There was nothing more to talk about on this subject it seemed. Sebastian watched the boy pull his game back up, that poker face having not changed at all through this talk.
"…Well, I'll still be coming over, to make sure you're passing the tests…I don't care how often you go to class, just pass the tests that come up so it looks good on me, and I won't bother you with any lessons at all."
"Sure. It's your time you're wasting, not mine." Ciel muttered back, eyes again glued to the screen.
Part Four
"You want me to…what?" Ciel replied, staring with an odd, unamused look on his face at the box in the taller mans hands. It was a box of hair dye, the words 'Raven Black' displayed in thick bold lettering above a picture of a woman with what he supposed was the so claimed raven black hair color.
"Help me dye my roots. All you ever do when I'm here is either play some type of time consuming game or act like a smart ass. So now you can act like a smart ass, but make my coming here worth my while." Sebastian seemed far too pleased with what he had just called him, a smirk showing on his face and he set the box in his hands and stepped inside, shutting the heavy wooden door behind him.
"Well? Are you going to help me or not? I have a large stack of math worksheets from the office you can do if-" Ciel quickly shook his head at this, letting his hand with the box still in it drop to his side as he turned and started up the stairs to one of the bathrooms they never used. This way no one would notice if the dye stained the white bathroom.
The small boy made my way up the stairs slowly, his free hand grabbing the gold railing as he did so. Hearing the sound his company's shoes made as they slowly stepped up behind him was irritating.
Once up the stairs he shuffled down to the end up the hall and opened the door there to reveal a dirty bathroom only ever used for the maids to fill water or pour chemicals into buckets. Really the word 'dirty' didn't suit it… more like stained. It was clean, but worn so that it would never be fit for companies use.
Ciel pointed to the stained bathtub after flicking on the dim lights to see better before lifting the box close to his face and turned it over in his hands to find directions. Not having any luck he opened it to find a large strip of paper that gave the directions in English on one side and Spanish on the other.
He set the box down onto the sink's counter that showed signs of paint drip, the stains and paint made this room look more like a janitors closet then a bathroom. He took the opportunity to glance at the person who was suppose to be his tutor. He had taken a seat on the tubs rim, watching Ciel closely with his legs crossed effortlessly.
"Do you need some help?" Sebastian's voice rang through the room, making Ciel jump slightly as he leaned down to search under the sink for some type of container as the directions called for. Obviously the cheap box of hair dye wouldn't bother to include something like that.
"You could do it yourself and avoid the risk of me screwing up on this… but otherwise, no. You can just sit there and let me do this for you like you wanted." He retorted in a level, if not amused, voice. Sebastian nodded idely. Really, what kind of answer had been been expecting anyway? While he waited for Ciel to finish the prep work he uncrossed his long legs and pushed himself back to sit inside the tub, his back leaning against the wall.
"…So if your hair color is fake, and your eye color is just contacts... is there anything about you that is real?" Ciel questioned sarcastically, continuing following the instructions and pouring the various mixes in the box into one plastic container, stirring the mix throughly. It instantly stained his hands black the moment he got even the tiniest bit on him. He shrugged it off, it wasn't like his skin wasn't already discolored, and clothes could be easily replaced.
Ciel thought about warning Sebastian how easily it would stain his clothes if he dripped some of the gunk, but at the same time Ciel had no intentions of persuading Sebastian to remove any article of clothing. So he let the subject lie.
Sebastian shifted as Ciel walked closer, silently asking how he wanted to sit to do this. Ciel sat on his knees over the rim, however the position both hurt his entire abdomen as well as his back and arms within seconds. The black haired man didn't look comfortable all folded up inside the tub either; those long legs suddenly weren't something Ciel envied.
Sebastian smirked upon seeing Ciel struggle with the position and adjusted himself again, laying in the bath long ways and taking hold of his wrist to tug Ciel in with him, pushing down on his shoulders to force him into a sitting position on his lap before handing Ciel the container full of the inky dye.
"You're abnormally small, you know that right? Anyhow, this should work better for us both, yeah?" Sebastian quipped.
Ciel couldn't stop his frown at this, both from being called small as well as the position he had been put in. He was right though; this position was the best he could think of that would work. Ciel didn't acknowledge the awkwardness and took the small shovel and comb applicator they gave in the box to use and silently began applying the dye around the lighter brown areas of Sebastians hair.
Half way though Ciel abandoned the applying device and switched to his own hands, it was much easier to work with that way. It was surprising how soft Sebastians hair was…Ciel had figured for being so punkish he'd be doing tons of drugs and things that could cause greasy hair. Not to mention all this dyeing had to dry it out quite a lot. But no, it was as soft as kitten fur. Ciel rather liked running his hands through it, it felt nice. Maybe Sebastian liked it too…His eyes were shut. Though Ciel assumed it was because he didn't want to get any of the chemicals in them. The smell alone was enough to make his own sting painfully.
After about an hour it was finished, and Ciel was right; both of their clothes had become completely stained. Though the stains on Ciels blue hoody showed up much more than on Sebastians mostly black clothing. Sebastian looked like a wet dog when he finally washed his hair out. He even shook it off like one.
Ciel expected him to say something while he sat there on his lap watching him examine his hair in the mirror in front of them. About how it looked good, or bad, or okay for his first try, something. But he just sat there, silently. Finally after what seemed like an eternity he spoke.
"I like your hair best…"
That caught him off guard. He didn't know what to say, so he didn't say anything. Just sat there. By the time Ciel thought of something the moment was gone and Sebastian was pushing him off his lap, tossing the empty box and container into the trash.
"I'll leave you alone now, then. Thanks for your help, Ciel. …Oh, have you ever gone to an arcade?"
"An arcade? Of course I have…Once or twice on certain occasions." he answered, a bit confused at what he was getting at. Ciel, too, stood up dusting his back jeans off from non-existent dirt.
"Good. I'll be taking you next week with some friends."
Part Five
Ciel wasn't sure what he'd expected the older, raven haired man to drive up in. In fact, the thought of him even having a car hadn't really occurred to him until now; in the brisk Saturday morning air.
Somehow though, the sight of the man driving up in a crisp white Prius just seemed off. He guessed he'd just expected something tougher looking, a motorcycle, some kind of hot rod or muscle car. Then again, the senior had surprised him before. He'd never guess someone with snake bites and leather pants would be applying for some notorious college.
The blue haired boy took his hands from his jacket pocket, carefully going down the shallow stone steps to meet up with the other. He heard the familiar unlocking and locking sound that seemed to be a constant for every car, and with that he opened the passengers side door. The senior who looked even more stereotypically punk then on a normal school day stuck out like a sore thumb against the dull interior of the car.
"A white car, huh? No candy red or jet black?" He mused; feeling the utter need to question the man on his choice in vehicles. The car was small; it made him feel quite safe, actually. He was used to large cars that swallowed him up, but this car seemed to be the right size for his small frame. He reached over to grab the seat belt, looking up to the other as they smothered a bit of laughter at the comment.
"My cars in getting some work done. An incident which involved a deer and me going faster then I probably should have been. This is my mothers. She was…Less than happy about letting me use it for the day." The man replied, starting up the car again and nearly breaking the boys eardrums with the sudden burst of loud music. A soft mumble of apology followed after he'd turned the small wheel like dial and lowered the volume.
He recognized the band as 'Farewell My Love', which he didn't mind as much as he did other emo or rock bands. He leaned back into the firm seat, wondering how new this car was so be so clean. The silence that took over was thick and heavy, settling over the aura inside the car like a wool blanket. Ciel didn't mind it, though. He lifted his head to watch the road quickly come before them, and vanish behind them just as hurriedly.
The boy found Sebastian was one of those fast and free drivers, making wide, quick turns; or for the sharper ones he'd half slam on the brakes and come to a quick near stop before turning. He seemed skilled enough though, and instead of feeling fear for his life he felt some sort of…rush, a feel of exhilaration and maybe even freedom. It was the first time he'd felt something like that in what seemed to be a very long time. He hadn't left the house aside from trips to and from the high school in a very long… The blue eyed boy even let a smile play at the corners on his lips; until he remembered the last time he'd driven like this. It had been with a specific blonde on a joyride with a stolen car. They'd gotten it back to it's owner without a scratch. With a wad of cash from his pocket they'd gotten out of the issue without another word or any police involvement.
The thought was shaken from the boys head as the older spoke, cutting the silence like a hot knife through butter. "You're going to be an eleven year old for the day." He said in jest, glancing over to see Ciels confusion before smirking. Lips curled in somewhat of a V shape. "You're small enough you could pass for one, it'll get you in for less." He explained.
Though Ciel understood the older mans reasoning he shook his head, fingers still tapping absentmindedly to the music playing. "I'll pay for everyone if you could just..not treat me as a child." The boy muttered in something of a groan. If he were to pick one pet peeve, being treated so young because of his height would have to be it.
"How many people are coming anyways? You said a few friends, is that right?" He asked.
"Yes." Sebastian replied, pausing as he turned a sharp corner, causing Ciel to nearly slam his head against the side window. "Two friends. They're from my year so you probably don't know them. I know for a fact they haven't talked about you at least." Sebastian explained, eyes on the road. Ciel took in the sight; the man having pushed the seat back as far as it would go so he could stretch out his long legs covered in those skin tight leather pants that Ciel vowed he would burn on the spot if he ever got the chance. He looked extremely calm all leaned back in the seat with arms and hands rather loosely grabbing to the wheel. His lips moved slow and somewhat articulated.
Ciel turned his head away once more, nodding as a sign of comprehension. The pair soon arriving farther into the city; crowds of people growing in mass and buildings seeming to move closer and closer together. Traffic also slowed to a near hault. At last Sebastian parked in a rather small parking lot next to an alleyway where two others stood, both of which dressed similar to the red eyed man. Ciel could only guess the loud noises of gaming machines was coming from their destination, seemingly just at the other side of the alley. Why they couldn't have just parked in that parking lot instead eluded him, but he said nothing on the subject.
He got out of the car, shutting the door and fiddling with his hoodie a moment. It was a wine purple color today, he'd mainly wore it just because it wasn't as used or worn down as some of his others, a bit larger too which helped hide the ailing color of his skin he was growing more and more self conscious of. The navy haired boy recognised one of the two older individuals waiting for them, the one with impossibly bright red hair. Even as reclusive as he was and how little attention he gave to others, it had always been hard not to notice that flaming color around the dull campus of the High school among all the natural colored hair. Said individual gave a bright smile as he and Sebastian approached the small group. The redheads face twisted again into an expression Ciel only wanted to describe as 'predatory' for lack of a better word.
"Oh, Sebby, when you said he was small I didn't think you meant sixth grade type small." The redhead purred, the voice everything but settling. Ciel slightly wondered if there was a sexual innuendo hidden in his words, but he disregarded it before he could disturb himself farther. Sebastian seemed to disregard the comment, too, and for that the blue eyed boy was ever so thankful.
"Ciel, this is Grelle and Claude." The red eyed man introduced in a level, monotone voice. At this the other senior came closer, just beside the one called Grelle. He gave a nod, and not one of those happy nods you make when you see your friend in the store, but one of those mutual respect nods people give you in the streets when their not looking for trouble.
"I guess we should get going then, huh?" Sebastian cut in, pulling out a small half empty pack of cigarettes, causing Ciel to roll his eyes at the utter stereotypically rebellious attitude as the tall man lit the stick. He said nothing however as the others agreed and began a slow walk around to the front of the loud building.
Once inside there seemed to be an extraordinary lack of game playing. Which Ciel supposed he wasn't so surprised by. After all these people didn't seem to be the type to come and waste their allowance or hard earned money on games of ski ball and bad racing simulators. No, he guessed they are more part of the crowd that loitered around and made fun of the people who took games way too seriously and bought gaming manuals just to get the machines high score. The people who parents made sure to tell the little kids who came to play not to stand around.
He didn't mind though, he wasn't wanting to rush off the play any of the rigged games, either. But it made him wonder what he was even doing here, standing around wasting his time while the people he came with talked about subjects that didn't even apply to him.
The boy had taken to staring blankly at a few children as they played, having to tune back into the others conversation once his name was called by his senior.
"So do you play?" The older asked, confusing Ciel a moment before he soon understood that the man was talking about the worryingly old gaming machine they stood by. He hadn't even bothered to see what the game was and had to lean back to check before answering the question. Pac-man, of all things. So he nodded.
"Well, I mean who hasn't played this at least once in their life?" He asked, earning a grin by the senior who quickly pulled up a game and gave him a little shove to the front of the machine.
"Go on, then." He pressed, still giving that devilish grin that made Ciel feel both comfortable and yet nervous all at the same time. But he played the game regardless.
He didn't even realize how long it had been, he just kept going until he lost. He got fifth on the scoreboard, and when he turned around noticed that a lot of those nerds and otakus had gathered around to watch. A few awed and others left while some gave him approving nods and hand movements.
He didn't know what to make of it until the red haired punk gave him a rather hard slap on the back. Which he guessed was meant to be a gesture of high spirits, but it caught him off guard and aside from nearly falling over caused him to start coughing.
"Top five on your first try, god damn."
Suddenly it made a lot more sense. People took these arcade games way too seriously sometimes. But his company seemed rather pleased. And though his body felt increasingly more like shit the more he stood and he knew he'd have to sit down in a moment or demand to be taken home, he took a few moments to relish in this 'accomplishment'. No matter how stupid he thought it. After all, it was the first time anyone had shown a sense of pride in him in…well a very long time.
Part Six
In the days that followed Ciel stayed home from school more often than not. He was gone seven days out of two weeks, to be exact.
Sebastian couldn't help but feel partly to blame for the boys sudden decline in health and regretted bringing him out in the weekend prior. That was until he thought about how happy he looked to be taken out and be treated like nothing was wrong and no less fragile than anyone else. His emotions and thoughts would just repeat themselves from there.
The black haired man had been called to be informed his tutoring wouldn't be needed both weeks Ciel had been mostly absent. Today was the first day since then that he could return.
So there he was; parked, slightly hesitant and still using his mother's car in the manors large circular driveway. He didn't really understand way he was so anxious to go inside. Perhaps afraid of what he'd see? He hadn't really talked or seen Ciel even on the few days he did come to school. He'd received a curt wave once or twice. That was the extent of it. So now actually being able to get details on how the other was doing was…odd. Then again, knowing him, the blue haired boy would keep the issue silent for as long as he could. Perhaps Sebastian would never know what was or had been going on.
When he entered the home he could faintly hear music from upstairs. Following the tune, he arrived to the short boys bedroom door. That anxious nerves feeling seem to have grown ten times the size it was back in the car now. But swallowing past it he bit the inside of his cheek and knocked; not waiting for a reply before entering the room with the biggest grin he could muster.
Ciel was in his bed when Sebastian entered. He looked calm and as if nothing was any different from how it was a few weeks ago. Hell, for all Sebastian had been told maybe there wasn't anything wrong, and that he had been worrying over nothing.
That was until the red eyed man noticed the large number of pill bottles and pumps that strung under the bed sheets and out of site. He didn't really care to know what they did in all honesty. Such goes the saying; ignorance is bliss.
"…You got a lot of work to make up, you know." He said finally, his voice breaking the increasingly awkward building silence.
The young boy only reached over to turn down the idle cd player by his bed, fiddling with the buttons a few time with fragile hands. Much weaker than Sebastian would have liked to remember as opposed to when they were pushing buttons on the rickety arcade machine.
"Did you say something?" Ciel hummed in a bored tone, bringing Sebastian back around to reality.
"Nothing." The tall man answered promptly, moving slowly to sit on the side of the bed. His hand moved discreetly over the sheets to make sure he wouldn't sit on any wires that may be hidden.
"You don't have to look so shocked." Ciel added, which made Sebastian jump. Was it that obvious? Well, he knew the other was intuitive...Or was his poker face just that terrible?
"I mean, I know cd players aren't really in style now. They're being taken over by ipods and the like. But it's not that usual for someone to use one." Ah- there it was. That old Ciel he had been waiting for. For a moment he'd worried the child had finally broken.
Though just at the taller man cracked a more genuine smile and opened his mouth to speak; a cough rang out from the younger.
Oh.
Like an instinct that black haired man reached over helplessly, as if there was something he could just press to make the other better. No such luck. Instead his hand was only slapped away by the ailing child.
"I'm fine-" The man wasn't so convinced of that. But what else was he meant to say? So without any further questioning, he gave the ailing boy the benefit of the doubt.
"Look, I really should just get to the point. You won't be needed anymore, Sebastian. What good is a tutor when you're not attending school, am I right?"
"How bad is it?" The question came spilling out before Sebastian could stop it. Earning him a confused and then a very angry look.
"Excuse me?"
"I said, how bad is it, Ciel? Stop skipping around it and tell me what's going on." Sebastian couldn't stop himself. His blood boiled. Why hadn't he been informed? Who had let it get this bad? Why wasn't this boy in a hospital? More so, was it his fault? It did seem like there outing was the turning point in the sudden decline. He could never forgive himself for that…
"It's cancer, Sebastian. Cells are corrupt and multiplying all over. I'm out of school because I can't make it outside without feeling like I'm dying, which I am. How much more do you really need to know? That they've practically saved me a seat in intensive care? You couldn't figure out 'how bad' it is on your own?"
That was enough to shut the man up. He'd been too invasive. "I'm sorry-"
"You don't just ask someone with cancer, no matter what stage, how bad it is. Just because I don't care doesn't mean someone else won't."
A nod. Suddenly the older man felt like a puppy who had done something they knew was wrong and could only look guilty as they sat in the corner.
"I just- I worry." He mumbled. That had been another instance where he spoke before he thought before he spoke.
"Oh no, no, no. You're not going to go soft on me like everyone else." The boy muttered, giving a feeble punch to the others arm. Which earned another smile, though it was a pained one. Not because it hurt. Quite the opposite, in fact. That playful hit felt so frail.
"Are you still going to let me visit? Even if it's not to bug you to do your work? I can't have you trying to kick the bucket on me."
There was a pause, then a small nod. Then came the most awful mix of sounds Sebastian had never considered he might ever hear. Between a racing heart monitor, choked coughs, and racing footsteps coming up the stairs to enter the room.
Part Seven
Every happened too fast for Sebastian to comprehend. One moment the younger boy was...well...At least not hyperventilating as he was being dragged off into one of the fancy cars outside.
After being shooed out he wasn't called again. Not for days. The anxiety killed him. Was it his fault? Perhaps he shouldn't have gotten the other so worked up. Either way, he was undoubtedly worried.
Finally, after what was close to a full week, he received a text. It was a simple one. Consisting of only numbers. Some may even call it cryptic.
'377'
What the hell did that even mean? No contact for weeks and this was all he got? Well, no doubt that was Ciel. Alive enough to mess around with him as per usual.
Thankfully, it didn't take the older too long to figure out the meaning of the numbers. They were the numbers of a hospital room. It was a way of asking for a visit. Or at least he assumed the other man wanted a visit.
It was enough of a hunch to pull the other man from his house and out into the mid fall cold to make a trip over to the general hospital. Still in that unfitting white Prius.
It took a lot of squabbling with the woman at the front desk to find and be let into the right room. But eventually he was up in an elevator running his head through the directions to the room.
Sebastian was possibly even more hesitant now then he had been a week or so ago, back when he intended to enter the boys room expecting the worst. This time he knew for a fact the others condition was bad - not just slacking off from school and priorities. Else he wouldn't be in a hospital.
The red eyed man found himself pacing once he was off the elevator and down the hall; in front of a room with small gold numbers reading 377. The door was closed and everything seemed quiet inside.
This might not be a good idea. He had caused the other to end up here in the first place, hadn't he? But then, Ciel wouldn't have asked him to come if he didn't want him.
In the end, curiosity won him over. He wanted to see how the other was, calm his nerves. Make sure he wasn't dead.
As silently and cautiously as he could, the senior pushed open the door made of a material he couldn't quite name. Both plastic feeling and yet very heavy and no doubt soundproof.
His reward was the sound of a steady heart monitor not so unlike the one that was in the boys room a few days prior when he'd come to visit. This one a bit louder and clearer than the other.
On the bed was a sleeping figure with their face mostly hidden. But he knew undoubtedly who it was by the dark navy blue hair.
Sebastian supposed he had taken longer than the other would have liked, as punishment they fallen asleep on him. The thought made him chuckle. The site calmed him. They looked peaceful like this - most likely still pained - but at least the drugs had knocked him out and let him escape at least for the tiniest moment. He wished he could be selfless enough to hope they never woke up…
What a wasted trip, in any case. Sebastian now had the choice of either leaving or waiting for the boy to wake. Either way resulting in lost time he could be spending doing something else.
That was probably his fault. He should have been smart enough to bring something to do. He could get lunch and come back. That seemed like a good idea, but-
Suddenly he was met with the awful feeling of not wanting to leave. He had been worried for so long, it was a breath of fresh air to see Ciel sleeping so soundly. He wanted to enjoy it as long as time would allow.
So, as a responsible adult, he did.
That was until the boy woke a some three hours later, near closing for visitors hours. Which was just as well. As the other woke, Sebastian felt a feeling of guilt build in his chest rapidly. Nevertheless he mustered the best smile he could.
"Did you have a nice nap?"
"When did you get here?"
"Awhile ago."
"Awhile?" Sebastian nodded, ending that conversation. Only to be brought into another.
"How do you feel?"
"Shitty."
God the poor boy was blunt. But he was seeming alive. And Sebastian would rather have blunt remarks then nothing at all.
"How bad is it?" He asked. He was joking now, and thankfully the boy smiled instead of taking it as offence.
"Bad." Ciel answered, quietly. It brought a reality Sebastian hadn't been prepared for...neither of them cared to talk about it any more.
It continued like that for weeks, Ciel never getting well enough to leave the hospital. Every time he seemed to be getting better there would be another scene, leaving him back in that same bed to do it all again.
Sebastian kept moment he got. Time was much more precious now…
There were also texts exchanged. Eventually the older man got more involved in seeing the boy than he was in finishing school. He would bring his work to the small room and do what he could while only half thinking. But he never seemed to finish in time. More so - Sebastian quit work. It took up far too much time into what little visiting hours they seemed to have.
This was until, finally, Ciel broke the typical pattern.
"I want to go outside."
Part Eight - Final
"Outside?" Sebastian asked, looking up from a book hesitantly. Outside didn't sound like a good idea. Ciel was in better health than he had been all week, but it wouldn't take much for it to decline at a rapid rate again. Especially cold late fall weather.
"Yes, outside. If I wanted to hang on to life by a thread uselessly I would have quit school and come in here a long time ago. You know this isn't what I want. I feel like I'm in prison." He was right, of course. He'd told Sebastian before this wasn't what he wanted to end up like. But still - sneaking him out would be illegal, for one. Not to mention if he did kick the bucket out there the older man would feel too responsible.
"...Maybe." Sebastian finally answered. He didn't have a heart to say no.
"I was asking if you wanted to come, not if you'd take me. I'll leave with or without you." Ah, yes, there it was. The never-dying attitude.
"Ciel, I don't think that's-" Too late, the other was already disconnecting wires and climbing out of the bed. "What, do you think they'll just let you march on out?" To this the boy frowned, his cheeks puffing out just slightly with annoyance.
"Of course they won't. Now ask me if I care." He spat back, Putting on a pair of slippers by his bed for the rare occasions when he was allowed up as he spoke.
Sebastian stood stunned for a moment before approaching the frail boy, offering a hand to steady him, but not wanting to push.
"I may be dying, but I am not crippled" Ciel remarked but took the man's hand anyway as he tested his balance and ability to hold his own weight on the cold hospital floors.
It was shocking to Sebastian how frail those hands had become. They were obviously unhealthy before, but only now had it gotten to the point where touching them made him cringe with worry. They glowed an unhealthy jaundiced yellow, a sure sign of the state his body was succumbing too
The man didn't approve of this; but there was no way he could just let the boy go out on his own.
"We are going to the beach." Ciel said shortly. A reasonable request or rather, demand for a dying boy. Or so it seemed. He didn't bother sharing the fact it was the last place his parents had taken him before their unfortunate accident. He didn't feel Sebastian needed all the details, the man was barely concealing his sympathetic glances behind those red contacts.
"The..beach." Sebastian nodded firmly . "You still haven't explained how we are going to get you out of here"
"Through the front door, of course" Ciel remarked flippantly as he reached under his bed, producing the clothes he had been wearing when he checked in.
"Now stop staring and help me get these clothes on."
Sebastian sidled up to the boy, helping him steady as he attempted to put his clothes on. Even in such a short time he had lost a lot of weight. The clothes hanging loosely on his frail boyish frame. The baggy hoodies could only mask so much.
Ciel finished dressing slowly but surely not saying a word to the man who had started off as a nuisance...but quickly became a friend. The only friend he had.
Standing as straight as he could manage Ciel began walking towards the door. The door that he had stared at with venom these long weeks. The door he had no intention on seeing ever again.
The two managed to actually pull off the appearance of two friends idly chatting as they walk down the long foreboding halls. Neither paying attention to the nonsense spewing through their mouths, erecting such a clever smokescreen.
Soon the were in the parking lot getting into that dreadfully boring yet...somehow soothing Prius.
Sebastian was the first the break the silence as they drove along, the scent of briny sea air beginning to waft through the vents.
"You don't seem like the sentimental last sunset kind of guy...what's the deal with the beach?"
"It was somewhere my parents took me often when I was younger. They used to tell me that the ocean is eternal. Always connecting people no matter the distance. It is all philosophical nonsense of course, but, it seems fitting to die there, doesn't it? To die where death does not exist?"
"Die? What..what?!" Sebastian slammed the breaks nearly flinging Ciel into the dashboard. "What do you mean? You're not dying. I mean. ... Not now. "
"Actually, I am. Those weren't just painkillers I disconnected . they were vital fluids , electrolytes and such" Ciel turned his head towards Sebastian expectantly "You can go now. Stopping in the middle of the street is a road hazard, you know."
Sebastian stared incredulously "You… you planned this?!"
Ciel scoffed. "Time is ticking and I would like to reach our destination before my heart gives out if you don't mind."
Sebastian began moving again, still mumbling under his breath. For awhile the car was again silent, Sebastian had to glance a few times to make sure the young man was still breathing.
They reached the beach quickly, mostly due to Sebastian being too preoccupied in his head to bother watching the speedometer.
"I...I support your decision Ciel." Sebastian said unbuckling his seat belt. "Its your life. Your decision. I just wish you had told me."
"You would have never let me leave the room if you had known. And I thank you for your... Support".
Sebastian wasn't sure whether the boy was being sarcastic or not, but, he could have sworn he heard a hint of sincerity in his monotone speech.
They quickly got out of the car and began making their way to the sand. Ciel only made it a few feet before collapsing, clutching his abdomen.
"Bloody anesthetics always wear off when you least need them too." he growled through gritted teeth.
Sebastian instinctively rushed to his side trying to help him somehow. This wasn't fair. He was still so young, not much older than himself.
Ciel lied there for a bit until the worst of the pain washed over him, he hasn't even noticed Sebastian's firm hand had been on his shoulder the whole time, quietly supporting him and giving him strength.
"Help me get to the shoreline… please." Ciel said gruffly, trying to mask the bit of wetness in his eyes.
Sebastian paused and nodded but instead of helping the boy up on his feet, he swiftly picked him up . "I know you're not a kid… and if you mention this to anyone… I'll kill you myself." he half forced a grin "Unlike you, I have a reputation to uphold."
"I'll take it to my grave." Ciel replied dryly, forcing a smile himself. Not exactly enjoying the whole being carried thing, but it did ease the pain quite a bit not having to support his own weight.
They approached the tide line and Sebastian set him down before plopping roughly himself down on to the cool mid autumn sand.
"So… now we just… sit?" Sebastian questioned, watching the tide roll in and out soothing his nerves.
"Unless you feel like running a marathon, yes, we sit." Ciel said smirking before a serious expression crossed his face.
"I want to thank you for doing this. You didn't have to and it would have been much harder getting here on my own"
"What are friends for?" Sebastian replied.
There was that word again. Friend. Ciel had never really had one of those. Between being, well, more influential than most and this often intimidated other peers, and the fact that after he got sick he saw no point in dragging another soul through all this. He had tried to distance everyone, but it seemed this crimson eyed charming demon of a man had thwarted his plan.
"Sebastian, promise me something?" Ciel said
"What is it Ciel? Want me to make sure they bury you with your IPad so you don't get bored?" Sebastian quipped.
"That's actually not a bad idea, but no, I was thinking… I never got a chance to see your car. My grandparents are already aware I wish to be cremated. When I die, I want you to take my ashes and scatter them… somewhere. It doesn't matter where. Just make sure we get there... Fast." Ciel said half murmuring. He was beginning to get sleepy. A sign his body was preparing to slip into a deep and final slumber. Without pain killers everything hurt now. His breathing was shallow and his expression turned to a wince every now and again. Thankfully his companion didn't seem to notice.
"I can do that. It's not like I can kill you twice." Sebastian said quietly while taking his jacket and wrapping it around the pale boy.
A sparrow flitted by as they sat there peacefully, pecking at what looked to be a long past fresh hot dog bun.
They sat in silence for what felt like an eternity for Sebastian, but it wasn't awkward. There was almost… a calming energy around both of them.
Soon, the sun began to set and the breeze began to nip at Sebastian skin. He turned to check in Ciel, placing a hand on his forearm. He was cold, very cold. Too cold. Too calm.
"Ciel…? Hey... Ciel." Sebastian shook him gently, knowing by the pit in his stomach that it would be to no avail.
"... You be good now." he mumbled quietly, collecting the boy and wrapping him in the jacket before carrying him to the car. He looked so...peaceful. Innocent. He chuckled to himself. Death was clearly a clever liar.
The drive back to the hospital was long and heavy. Sebastian knew he had done the right thing. He allowed the young man to go on his terms but still his heart was heavy. He had always wore the tough guy exterior to keep people away, and this precocious little rebel had just...shattered him.
Explaining himself to the hospital, his grandparents, and the police was less than fun. After a few hours of questioning and berating, he was permitted to go home.
Several weeks later...
The '68 mustang purred powerfully in the rounded driveway. He clenched the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white.
Finally he mustered up the courage to knock on the door.
He was greeted by the sad but kind eyes of what he presumed was Field grandfather.
"You must be that nice young man Ciel said was tutoring him. I found his last request a bit odd to have you handle...his remains but...that was what he wanted." He said quietly "Here. Take good care of my Ciel. Life was terribly harsh to him. He deserves a restful death" He handed him the ornate urn that Sebastian was fairly certain was comparable in price to his car.
"Yes sir. " He replied respectfully smiling "I have the perfect place for him."
Sebastian carefully took the vessel and carried it to the car, securing it tightly.
"Well Ciel, here we go. You wanted speed? Today, were gonna fly"
Sebastian smiled, placing an IPad with PAC Man paused on the screen by the urn.
"In case you get bored... " He said softly.
The man drove along quietly until he reached the coastline, the roads as clear as he had hoped.
"Ciel, you have your wings now. Let's fly. " with this Sebastian put the gas to the ground, the tires screeching at the sudden torque.
The car jerked to life as the needle flew past the glowing numbers on the dial. It took only moments for Sebastian to feel the sharp jerk as the car sailed passed the guard rail, throwing both him and the urn into a free fall. They say your life flashes before your eyes before you died. Sebastian saw Ciel, how he used to always hide behind that IPad, the time he got covered in black hair dye, the feeling of his lithe body on his lap and nimble fingers running through his hair. Oh what could have been. If only there had been more time. Sebastian's last thought as he closed his eyes was whether it be heaven, hell or void to greet him on this next journey. He wondered if he would be reincarnated. But no matter what happened, he would be with Ciel. The frail and defiant boy who stole a punks heart.
The waves crashed. The car plummeted. There was silence. There was peace.
The papers reported next morning of the tragic suicide of another emo teen. They spoke of the lost potential. They spoke of a grieving town. All mindless embellishment. They didn't know. There was no tragic ending, merely a uniting of two stubborn and guarded hearts in love.