Disclaimer: Ok people, you know the drill, here's the part where I tell you that I don't own Dee, Ryo, Olivia, or Elliot they belong to Dick Wolf and Sanami Matoh. So guess what stupid lawyers!! *sticks out tongue* YOUR NOT SUING ME TODAY OR NE DAY MOO HOO HA HA HA!!! ok i'm better, but for real, please don't sue me.
~*~*= change of scene
A Time For Everything
By Magical Duct Tape Angel
Lost
Lost in the darkness of a land
Where all the hope that's offered is
Memories of being taken by the hand
And we are led into the sun
Dee sat alone at in the interrogation room, nervously tapping his finger tips against the table. This was the first time in a week where he had had to discuss what he preferred to call, "The Incident." It had happened in an alley way…he remembered that much. He remembered being drugged then dragged into the completely secluded area. After that though…it was hard to remember. One thing he did remember though…was the hoarse feminine voice and the excruciating pain. He could still feel her touching him, calling him names, and beating him with a baseball bat. Dee shuddered at the memories. All of them made him feel so dirty and embarrassed. He had felt this way before…but that time he had had to go through it alone, without the police knowing. This time, he had been lying in the alley bleeding to death when a little girl and her mother had found him and called the police.
Dee hated to think of both of those times. The first time taught him to never trust anyone; the second had taught him to watch out for women who hated gay men. He specifically remembered her saying that she was going to try and 'turn him around' and that she hated 'you people.' Despite having nearly been beaten within an inch of his life, Dee had managed not to sustain permanent damage. Sure, his right leg was almost completely shattered and his left wrist had practically been snapped in half, but other than those injuries, none of the others were permanent. He also had bruises everywhere and a cut that ran down almost the entire length of his back, some small burns from where she had put her cigarettes out on him and some other small cuts, but those would heal in no time at all.
Dee quickly opened the soda that he had bought on his way over here. Last night these two SVU detectives had called him and wanted to interview him. The man…Detective Stabler was his name, had told him that his department had a hunch that his rape had to do with many other rapes in the area. Evidentially this woman was going around and raping all the gay men she could find, trying to get them to 'see the light,' as she so eloquently put it. So, the SVU detectives had wanted to interview him and see what he could tell them, since he was one of the very few victims that were alive. Dee took a swig of his Coke, set it back down on the table, and began quietly drumming his fingers against the table again.
"God! What's taking them so fucking long? I have places to be you know." Dee said out loud. It was true, he had to run errands for Mother and she was expecting him back by 4 o'clock and it was already 3.
Just as he was about to reach for another swig of his soda, the door opened and 2 detectives walked in; a man and a woman. The woman looked vaguely familiar. She was wearing long black pants, a light blue silk dress shirt and black heels. It took him a few minutes to realize how he knew her.
"Olivia? Is that you?" Dee asked inquisitively.
"Dee? Hey man! How the hell are ya?" She sat down on the other side of the table and shook the hand that wasn't encased in plaster.
"Uhh...well as you can see I've definitely been better, but I was doing ok until this happened." Dee raised his eyebrows at her. "So who's your partner, or aren't you going to introduce us?"
"Oh sorry, Dee Laytner this is my partner Elliot." Elliot walked over to Dee and also shook his hand.
Elliot plopped down in the chair next to Olivia. "So where do you know Olivia, Dee?"
"Oh we go waay back. We went to the Academy together." Dee smiled at the memories. "She used to help me hide from J.J." Dee smiled again.
Olivia rolled her eyes. "Have you seen J.J. lately? I heard he got transfered to some slum department where he hits on one guy repeatedly."
As soon as Olivia said that, Dee just started cracking up completely.
"What?! What's so funny?" She gave him a very confused look.
"Your looking at the guy that he hits on repeatedly." He managed to choke out between fits of laughter.
"Really?! Is he still pulling that same shit that he did in the Academy?!" Now Olivia and Dee were both cracking up and having trouble breathing.
Elliot cleared his throat at the both of them. "Guys, uhh hello, we'll have time to catch up on old times later, but for now Olivia and I need to ask you some questions Dee." Elliot said condescendingly. Olivia quickly straightened up and regained her composure.
"Right, ok." Dee said uncomfortably.
"So, Dee, tell us about your partner, you were at his apartment the night that it happened right?" Olivia asked him.
"Yeah, I was at Ryo's place." Dee's shoulders were visably sagging under the weight of his depression at the mention of his partners name. "We were hanging out and we had just finished eating dinner when the doorbell rang. Ryo got up to answer it and it was J.J. He had stopped by to give Ryo the files he had requested when he saw me. J.J. ran into the apartment and started grabbin' me and kissin' me and all that stuff and Ryo yelled at us both to get the hell out of his apartment if we were gonna do that stuff then he threw us out. I managed to shove J.J. off of me, and I stood outside of Ryo's apartment for a half an hour yellin' at him that it wasn't what he thought it was..." Dee sighed. "Ryo's never really trusted me. So, I got sick of makin' excuses to him and walked away, by that time J.J. was gone and I was left to walk home. I was about a quarter of the way home when I realized that I'd forgotten my gun at Ryo's, but I didn't feel like going back and gettin' it, so I figured that Ryo would bring it in the next day. The next thing I knew, I was bein' pounced on and felt a needle slide into my back, after that, the only thing I can remember is the pain, then waking up in the hospital." Dee made a quick inhalation of breath then sagged down into his chair.
The room was quiet for several seconds before Oliva finally spoke. "So you're involved with your partner?"
Dee gave a snort of disgust. "I wish." For a minute he looked angry, but then sadness seeped into all of his features again. "But, its only a one sided love, he's never receprocated, so I'm giving up."
Olivia quickly tossed a file onto the table that Elliot handed her. "This has happened to you before, hasn't it Dee." She said quietly.
Dee gulped then quickly tried to find his words of denial, but couldn't find them. "Yes." He said in a whisper.
"Who was it Dee? That did this to you the first time?" Oliva asked just as quietly as Dee grabbed the soda can hard, like it was his lifeline.
"It was Jess's partner." He replied, not looking at anyone, instead choosing to stare down at the table.
"And Jess was your foster father wasn't he? He was a cop that was killed on the job." Elliot said neutrally.
Dee quickly took a gulp of soda then spoke. "Yeah, it was after the funeral...that it happened. He told me he had some pictures of Jess that I might want and to stop by his place to get them...and I did." He shuddered at the memories and buried his head in his arms on the table.
"Have you told Ryo yet Dee?" Elliot asked.
Dee sat up abruptly. "No!" He said in an urgent voice. "I don't want him knowin!" Dee sighed after he said this and his shoulders sagged a bit, but he remained determined. "Ryo isn't gonna hear about this. I've requested that my files be kept from him, and as far as he knows I just fell down a flight of stairs as I was comin' down from my apartment."
Olivia looked at Dee intently, then finally spoke. "Dee, I think that he would want to know about it...maybe he could help."
"I dont want his help dammit!" He said angrily. "Ryo has this habit of taking in strays and I will not be just some stray to him!"
"Ah...I see it now." Olivia said knowingly.
"See what?" Dee said just as angrily as before.
"You think that if he finds out about this, he'll admit his love to you, then you'll always wonder if you were just someone he took in or if he really loved you."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
FLASHBACK
But I don't have a hold on what is real
Though we can only try
What is there to give or to believe?
I want it all to go away, I wan't to be alone
Dee lay alone on cold cement. He wasn't sure where he was, but he heard dripping coming from the ceiling, so he assumed he must be in a basement or a cellar. Everything was black, he had a blindfold on. His wrists and hands were bound, and he was completely naked. He was scared, anything could happen to him with him all tied up like this. He was just beginning to think of all the things that could possibly happen to him, when a deep female voice purred to his right. "Well, your awake Mr. Laytner."
"That's Detective Laytner to you." He said in that smart-ass way of his.
"Now, now Detective Laytner, its not nice to talk to people that way, maybe I should teach you a lesson hmm?"
He heard footsteps coming closer and closer to him, and he began to brace himself both physically and mentally for whatever was going to happen. In now way was he prepared for the hard high-heeled kick in the stomach. Dee groaned in pain and rolled over, facing away from her. He heard her evil laugh sound from behind him, laughing at his pain.
"What do you want from me?" he managed to gasp out through the pain.
"I think you know that Detective. Your gay aren't you?"
"For your information I'm bi." Dee said angrily.
She gave her deep purr of a laugh again. "Same difference. Your all alike. Its my job to try and get you to like women and only women. Its my job to turn you around and get you to see the light."
Dee was getting nervous now, he knew what was going to happen and it reminded him too much of what happened in his childhood. Through the blackness of the blindfold he could see the scene from his childhood playing through. (a/n: I know this is confusing, but its like a flashback within a flashback, think of it as like he's remembering what happened.) He was at Jess's funeral, looking down onto his closed eyes and still body. Then he was looking down into the deep dark hole that was Jess's final resting place. Jess's body was being lowered into the hole, just as soon as the first shovelful of dirt hit the lid of the coffin, a large hand clapped down onto his shoulder. Come on kid, I got some pictures of Jess at my apartment that you might want. Said the light haired man dressed in the police officer's uniform: Jess's partner. He was going back to the man's apartment. The man was looming over him. He was asking the man where the pictures were. Then the man was breathing hard into his ear behind him and there was incredible pain, like lemon juice being poured into a papercut. He was crying. The man was driving him home and threatening to kill him just like Jess had been killed if he told anyone. Would he like to join Jess? No! Was his insistent answer. He wouldn't tell Mother, he would keep quiet. What a good kid, so long as you don't tell anyone, you won't end up being worm food just like Jess. And with that he sent him off, bruised and cut and mentally injured.
Dee could hear her behind him, putting out a cigarette on his back, he was oblivious to the pain. She had already raped him at least 3 times, maybe more, he didn't remember. All he kept seeing in his minds eye was Ryo, his sweet sensitive Ryo. He began to imagine that Ryo was bursting in through the door with back up, killing the woman and covering him up with his coat. Taking him back to his house and curing all of his pain. But Ryo didn't know he was here, he didn't care. Dee began to realize that Ryo was gone from his grasp. He wouldn't want him now…..he was contaminated. He also didn't want to expose his sweet, beautiful, innocent Ryo to this filth.
She leaned over and purred quietly into his ear. "So Detective, have you seen the light yet?" But he was so lost in his own mind, invisioning his Ryo and his Mother saving him that he didn't even hear her.
Sympathy's wasted on my hollow shell
I feel there's nothing left to fight for
No reason for a cause
And I can't hear your voice and I can't feel you near
He began to mutter under his breath. Words that didn't make make any sense to her. "Ryo…..Penguin….Ryo….love…..forever…." Then he began to sob and thrash and make too much noise, someone would hear. She quickly walked over to a corner of the room and picked up a piece of metal pipe and took it to the back of his head. He was unconsious as soon as the metal hit his head. She sighed, she'd have to take him out to the trash now, at least he was dead and couldn't talk like the last one she did over. She quickly untied him and grabbed his ankles and dragged him out of the cellar and put him out with the garbage bags.
All hope was gone, everything was black. Ryo and Penguin had left him. He began to cry and call out to them, but no matter how hard he called to them and tried to run to them, they wouldn't come back. He realized that Ryo had left him because he didn't really love him…He had wasted the past 2 years of his life for nothing. If Ryo didn't love him now, he never would. She must have Penguin hidden somewhere, tied up like he was, that was why Mother wasn't coming to his rescue. He began to weep uncontrollably, then there was a sharp pain in the back of his skull and all went dark.
Lost in the darkness of a land
Where all the hope that's offered is
Memories of being taken by the hand
And we are led into the sun
But I don't have a hold on what is real
Though we can only try
What is there to give or to believe?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ryo quickly jogged up the steps into the building. He didn't understand why Rose had chosen him to run these files over to the SVU unit. Rose had said that if he looked around some, he might find something that interested him. Ryo had no idea what Rose was talking about, so decided not to let it get to him.
He quickly made his way to the chief's office to drop off the files.When he finally reached the door to the office, he knocked quietly.
"Come in!" a voice called from inside the office.
Ryo opened the door and stepped in. "Detective Randy MacLean sir. I have some files for you from Commisioner Rose."
"Ah, yes, Detective MacLean, Berkley told me that you'd be by. I understand that your partner is Detective Laytner am I correct?"
"Yes, sir, but what does Dee have to do with any of this?" Ryo asked the Chief.
"He's being interviewed by 2 of my detectives concerning his rape, if you wait around for a few minutes you can see him, he should be out shortly."
"Wait, what do you mean Dee's rape? He wasn't raped, he just fell down a flight of stairs." Ryo gave the man a look that clearly stated that he was crazy.
"No, your partner was raped, Dectective. If you want I can take you into the interragation room right now so you can see him, I don't know why you think he fell down a flight of stairs." The Chief quickly stood up and walked out of the room, with Ryo right on his heels. The older man knocked on the door of the first interragation room and opened the door to let Ryo in.
The sight that greeted Ryo shocked him. The woman detective was crouching next to Dee's chair, in front of a pair of crutches that leaned against the wall. Dee was crying and rocking back and forth in his chair with his head in his hands. Dee's right leg was in a cast and his left wrist was also encased in plaster. He had many small cuts and what looked like burns all over every piece of exposed skin. The male detective was sitting across from Dee still trying to ask him questions.
Ryo just stood there for a few minutes, watching his best friend and partner cry until finally he found his voice. "Dee...." He said quietly. As soon as he spoke, Dee stopped crying and sat up rigidly. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights, his eyes were big and round and he was so scared that he was almost shaking.
"Ryo....." Dee gulped. "What are you doing here?" Dee tried to sound innocent like he was just catching up with old friends, but then he realized that Ryo knew something and hung his head. "Ryo..." Dee repeated quietly, this time he said it without the fear in his voice, instead his voice was etched with sadness. "You should be at work...you should have never come here."
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Hahahahaha don't you just love cliffhanger endings? I'm sorry if this fic counterdicts anything in the manga, but I've only read so far. Don't worry, I'll be updating soon. REVIEW ME!! If Ducttape doesn't get any reviews, Ducttape isn't happy. And if Ducttape isn't happy, then Ducttape doesn't write.