Natalya peeks around the wall, then shuffles over to his seating cushion so quickly that he almost falls over from his surprise. He glances up at her, then look back to the bowls in front of him. His chopsticks hesitate before he leans them lightly against his rice bowl.
"Natalya?"
She hesitates, then shifts her hip against his to nudge him over. Kiku obliges, even though the cushion is too small, made for only one person- he isn't even really sure what she's driving at that she can't get from her side of the table, but-
"I want to sit… here." She looks down, her hair obscuring her doubtlessly emotionless expression, despite the almost tender words spilling from her lips. "Beside you."
He almost chokes on his tongue in shock but manages to clear his throat instead. Well… best be... calm about this… He nods once, then turns away to reach for her bowl across the table. He moves to serve her for a moment, but when he turns back around to hand her the full bowl, he finds her much closer than she was before- and when he relaxes back into his own space, their arms press against each other in a manner that he finds both comfortable and amusing. No matter what, Natalya was still something of a cat… desiring to be touched and yet uncomfortable with displays of affection, even in private. He finds her, above all else, cute. Listening to the rain as they eat quietly together, Kiku thinks to wonder why she'd chosen to move closer, then decides that such a rare opportunity is not to be squandered.
He gingerly lifts a small piece of sausage and tilts it in the direction of her lips, his own lips ghost-shadowing her as they direct her mouth to part by opening themselves. She obediently leans forward and he feels the wood lightly graze against her teeth. He looks at her expectantly, but she busies herself with piling more of the sausage on to her dish. Feeling his eyes on her, she glances at him.
"What?" Kiku moves his head in the direction of the food in her bowl, but she simply tilts it towards him to show him the contents. "It tasted good so I got more."
"Ah… but…" He decides to tease her. "I wanted some as well. Weren't you going to let me taste?" Natalya's face grows slightly warm as she stares into her bowl, then decisively picks up a small piece. She moves her chopsticks toward him, but he shakes his head, a teasing smile playing across his lips as he scolds her lightly. "Natalya, romantic plagarism isn't allowed."
"Romantic plagarism…?" Natalya's hand freezes uncertainly, falter. Her voice turns suspicious. "Kiku, what are you talking about?"
"I already fed you with the chopsticks, so… I want you to feed me, too." He places his hand over the one with the pair of utensils in it and lowers her hand to the table. "Not with these." Shifting forward, he lightly grasps her chin with the same hand and traces her lips with the slightly calloused pad of his thumb. His voice is barely a whisper as he breathes the words. "With these."
Natalya leans into his lips for a forgotten moment, then makes to kiss him before he slips away from the vicinity of her mouth. For a split second, she looks confused, but Kiku's expression is impassively patient. He mouths the words.
I'm waiting.
She lifts her hand and brings a piece of meat to her lips before glancing at his own mouth. He smiles, barely imperceptibly as she leans forward haltingly. A curious thought wondering why she'd chosen to move beside him flits through his mind when a telltale sound of thunder shakes the entire house and Natalya stiffens immediately.
For a brief moment, aside from the mild disappointment since he was certain that she was going to do it, her reaction amuses him- not from derision, but simply the concept that he alone is privileged to see this bittersweet side of Natalya that would shock others to know. Natalya Arlovskaya, queen of ice and snow, was afraid of thunder to the extent that she would cast aside her reluctance to get close to him, just to feel safe. The thought leaves him conflicted- each time she gets closer to him, he hopes that she is opening up, just a little… and each time, her actions can be reasoned and explained away.
Keeping this in mind, Kiku reaches out and hugs her lightly to him, feeling as she gradually relaxes in his arms. He knows that mentioning it aloud will only irritate her, a sign to her that he is pointing out a weakness and, truly, something that could not bother him less. Kiku holds her more tightly as she relaxes into him, enjoying the way her soft body presses against his wordlessly, even as he understands her meaning.
She finally pulls away with a slow reluctance that eases the doubts in his chest. Kissing Natalya lightly on the forehead, he stands and turns to leave to grab a candle of the impending blackout that was sure to come. He hesitates, then offers his hand to help her stand. She reaches for it, then retreats, her voice a murmur. She speaks without her usual vehemence but he reads the warning beneath.
"I can stand on my own."
"I know," he replies. "I just want to be there, in case you wanted me to."
Placing a candle on the table, he lights it, then shuts off the light before sitting back down.
They finish the meal in relative silence as was usual when she came to visit, but the relaxed atmosphere of the flickering fire and her soft warmth leaned up beside him could not spell 'comfortable' more easily.
At the very least, he takes comfort in the fact that he has the ability to make her feel safe at all.
Natalya places her empty dish on the table gingerly in the dim light. She leans forward on her knees and lifts the half-full bowl gingerly from the table, half of her hip bumping against his shoulder as she backs from over the table. She stumbles slightly, but is caught by the waist as Kiku rights her. He quickly lets go, taking the opportunity to lean forward himself, collecting his dishes together and moving to take hers.
"Wait."
Kiku looks at Natalya curiously, setting the dishes back down onto the table. She doesn't reply, instead nervously fidgeting with the hem of her sleeves.
"Hm?"
"Don't rush me," she blurts.
"Rush… you…?" He leans away from the table, concerned. "Natalya, are you al-" Her voice rings out in a quiet murmur.
"I thought it would be easier if the lights were dimmer but… it's just as hard."
"Hard? What's just as hard?"
"Getting… getting close to you…" Natalya looks utterly embarrassed, and even in the light of the candle he can see her conflicted expression on a scarlet face. He leans forward but she stops him. "Don't move. Just… don't get any closer to me." Kiku blinks for a moment, struggling against confusion as he wonders if she's rejecting him. She takes a handful of his shirt and grips it tightly. "I… I want to." She doesn't move.
Kiku lifts his hand to cover hers gently. "May I make a suggestion?" Natalya eyes him and follows the direction of his eyes at the candle. It takes a moment but she understands, looking back at him dubiously.
"But… the thunder…"
He strokes the hand Natalya has gripped onto his shirt, then gently lifts it to press his lips against her fingertips. He murmurs sweetly against her skin. "I'll keep you safe." Her eyes travel towards the candle, then Kiku. Taking a breath, she blows out the candle, leaving only the sudden darkness and the gentle, steadier sound of rain as the thunderstorm subsides.
His eyes yet unadjusted to the darkness, he feels himself being pushed to the ground, then a warm weight being pressed against his abdomen. He doesn't move at first, then chooses to carefully, lightly, rest on her hips. Kiku speaks hesitantly. "Natalya?"
She doesn't reply, instead pressing her warm mouth against what she thinks his mouth- instead her lips land lower, against his chin. He smiles at her mistake, and moves to speak, but is surprised to feel her lips lift away, then against his skin once again in a jagged, unplanned trail that leads down to his neck, then loops up again to his ear.
So this is how you feel about me, mhm?
It tickles, just a little, as her hair trails against his face and follows her path of movement, and Kiku tenderly tucks the pale blonde strands behind her ear and quietly accepts the rare display of affection with quiet appreciation.
When her lips end their gentle cycle at his lips, he receives her kiss with a relaxed and easy patience that soothes her so much that she can feel time slow down around her.
Natalya tilts her lips out of the kiss, then opens her eyes to look at Kiku, He keeps his eyes shut, listening to the rain and reminiscing on the taste of her that lingers in his mouth.
Natalya presses her lips lightly against his once more with an offkilter pause, then speaks. "It's hard to get close to you, but... I think it's worth it, for you. B-because I... Because I..." She trails off, her pause so long that Kiku is prompted to open his eyes.
"Natalya?"
"Kiku..." She presses her forehead into his neck and murmurs the words like a secret into his damp skin. "I love you."