Fanfiction: Guinevere, Post-Arthur death
Her voice cracked. It was something she despised more than anything. Every time she tried to speak, she couldn't help the small crack from coming through. She had lost track of the time. She looked up from her lap and was shocked to see the knights standing in front of her. Her eyes watered and she fought hard to keep the tears from spilling.
Gwen's chest felt heavy. She couldn't do this. She wasn't going to be cu tout for this. This was never how her life should've ended up. She shook her head. iNo, this is exactly how it was supposed to be./i She had always loved Arthur. Since the moment she had laid eyes on him as a young girl. She originally had only thought of it as a silly crush. How wrong she had been.
He had always been arrogant, but given his father that wasn't very shocking to her. Yet, he had always been very kind to those of lower status, such as herself. Maybe it is how he smiles at her everyday. Like her presence made everything in his life better. iSmiled./i Past tense.
She stood slowly, trying her hardest to stop her legs from shaking. She faced the men standing in front of her. Taking a deep breath, she folded her fingers in front of her.
How to address these men? Arthur's closest friends and allies. They had seen him through thick and thin, just as she had. What could she say that would ease their pain and suffering? She could talk of his great deeds and everything he had sacrificed for them to live. Of his personality and how everything around him seemed so bright and adventurous. Yet it didn't seem enough.
There weren't enough words in her head to compensate for what she was thinking. She was slowly breaking inside and her heart felt like it had broken into a million pieces. They were slowly spreading throughout her body. Infecting her like a poison.
She looked into their eyes, each of them looking just as, if not more, hurt as she. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her face began to twist as the tears finally fell from her eyes. She opened her eyes to find Leon also had tears rolling down his cheeks.
"I loved him too." The words slowly crept from her mouth as she finally crumbled to the ground. The knights rushed to help her up from the floor. She held up her hand to stop them as she began to sob.
"I can't accept that this has happened. He's Arthur. He always promised to come home and he always has. I don't understand what happened to make him break a promise. He was known for his word. I just don't-" Her voice cracked as she began to stand.
"Mordred." Percival had spoken from his spot in the corner. He was the only person who hadn't begun to cry. "We think he attacked Arthur. Merlin will be able to explain better once he returns." Gwen shook her head.
"I don't think Merlin will return to us. He once told me his purpose to was to protect and serve Arthur. Now that Arthur is- he won't be returning." She turned to face the altar of the thrones in the great hall. Her thrones. She was the ruling monarch now.
"I can't do this alone. I can't be queen alone." She walked up the steps and sat in her throne. She reached over and brushed the armrests of Arthur's throne. She could still imagine his arm resting there, his hand searching for hers. She looked back at the remaining few knights who had survived.
"I know nothing of strategic purposes. I understand the people and their needs, but not military or politics. I will require your help. I won't expect you to pledge your allegiance to me." She paused. "Actually I insist that you don't. I will only be queen regnant. I want you to remain in service to Arthur, despite his death. We will stand united and remain his loyal servants. No matter our rank. Pledge loyalty to him and the kingdom he loved so dearly."
She smiled. That is exactly what he would've wanted. For his knights to stay true to the kingdom they had sworn to protect. Not just the king who sat on the throne, but the place they called home. "You are dismissed for the day. I thank you for your service and dedication."