Always Watching You
By Malia C Quintro
A/N: Hey guys! Yes, I'm back with another Spider-Man Fic. I Know, even after my promises to finish my other one, [Let's Be Superheroes!], has yet to be fulfilled. But this came randomly while I was re-watching the Amazing Spider-Man movies and I couldn't help it! This fallows right after Gwen's death and all those months he's been hanging around her grave. So now everyone, gather round children…
Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Spider-Man, otherwise too much would be different ;)
Warning(s): If you're new to my work, you should all know now that I put mature ratings on most, my fics because somewhere along the line I'm gonna add some sort of graphic content. From fluffy cuteness to sex and gore, my stuff seems to jump around. I'm expecting all of the above, simply because Wade Wilson will be involved. Further more, I have no limitations to what sorts of pairings will be involved, which means
I include Slash. For those who don't know what Slash is, it's Yaoi. Boys Love.
Pairings List:
*Peter x Gwen
*Peter x Harry O. [Past]
*Wade x Peter
*Eventual SpideyPool
Chapter 1: Lose Yourself
*Peter's POV
She was my world. Every day, from the moment I woke up, she was the first thing on my mind. How long it would take me to get to school, how long it would take till I saw her face… And then she'd smile. The sun shining down on her, wind blowing through her hair… She was so beautiful. Smart and so kind… So full of life
One day, the day she needed me the most… I couldn't save her. And she slipped right through my fingers…
Gwen Stacey. My girlfriend died, because of me. And not one second dose it slip my mind… Not one, that I don't regret what I did to her.
I lost everyone. My uncle Ben, my best pal Harry, Gwen's father…
Maybe it guilt, or maybe I've finally cracked. One too many to the head, or the stress finally got to me, I don't know… I see her all the time, everywhere I go, Gwen's always around. And I know, I'm nuts! After all she's dead, right? Even then I can still see her. I hear her voice when she talks to me, I can smell her sweet perfume she used to wear every day…
I know its crazy… but it's the only way I can get through the day, and I can pretend she's still here…
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*Normal POV
~Gwen's voice is in Itallics!~
"Peter? Peter are you listening to me?"
Peter sighed rubbing a hand through his hair. He blinked his eyes holding a hand over his face to hide from the sunlight. Gwen sat next to him on the grass, her image in front of the sun now made her seem like she was glowing. Peter was sure he had never seen anything more beautiful and fought the strange sob that was crawling up his throat and blinked away the tears.
"I'm listening, I'm listening… I need to finish homework, got it." She smacked his arm making him glare and groan in fake frustration … Even though he couldn't feel it.
"Peter! It's important you finish all your assignments or-" Another long groan left Peters lips but she couldn't help laugh at the sight of his goofy grin as he rolled his eyes.
"I know, alright! Sheesh, lady please! You're killing me here! Nah, I'm kidding. I promise I'll finish it tonight okay?" She searched him over for a second with a doubtful look in her eyes before she hummed in satisfaction and smiled.
"Okay…"
Peter smiled leaning his face into her carefully, their foreheads pressed together and he imagined that pressure against his face. The gentle feel of their noses brushing together before placing a small peck to her lips. He swallowed nervously, fighting to keep focused. He didn't want her image to slip away. And he sobbed lightly placing his head on her shoulders, the image was blurring but he could still hear her voice. 'Please don't go Gwen…'
"Peter what's wrong? You're scaring me." Blonde hair fanned over his face mixing into his brown unruly hair. Peter wondered briefly if this was God's way of punishing him for Gwen's death. It was a pretty sick form of punishment if it was.
"No-nothings wrong… We should get going its getting late." He grabbed his back pack starting his walk home with Gwen walking right beside him.
~ ~ AWY ~ ~
Having Gwen around made it bearable to live, but there was a down fall to being the only one who could see her. For one he was, the only one who could see her. Two, nobody else could hear her. So he kept his headphones in his ears to make it seem like he was talking with someone over the phone. Otherwise people would start to paying attention and he didn't want that. He didn't want them to take Gwen away from him; didn't want the numbing medication or long talks with psychiatrists that didn't understand anything.
Peter walked into a small store to buy some milk and eggs for his aunt before they continued the long walk home.
The streets were mostly empty by the time he reached about a block away from the house and he looked over to see Gwen smiling back at him. Her cheeks flushed from the cold and the tip of her nose was red. He smiled and watched as she pulled her coat closer, observing every little movement and fidget. He could see her walking and the heels of her boots clicked along side his shoes in his mind.
"What's May making for dinner tonight?" He chuckled lightly to the oddly normal question she asked.
"I-I don't know… I think its spaghetti and meat balls tonight."
"Sounds good, hopefully you're not wrong and it's meatloaf night again." Peter snorted.
"Oh nah, no, then I'd be in trouble! That stuff is gross." She laughed loudly at his response, her head tilting back like it would when she'd laugh too hard and her nose would wrinkle just a little at the bridge.
"You're horrible; you should stop lying to her and tell her you don't like it. Besides it's disgusting how much ketchup you use trying to get rid of the taste!" He laughed leaning into her.
"Oh, I'm disgusting? Have you tasted it? That stuff is nasty!" They laughed walking up the steps of the house and it took him a second to calm down with a sigh to open the door and walk inside.
"Aunt May! I'm home!"
"Oh Peter! Just in time for dinner!" Peter walked into the kitchen to find her cleaning the stove and turning off the oven. He groaned softly as Gwen snickered beside him, it was meatloaf night for sure.
"Now don't fuss, and take your things upstairs before you eat."
She smacked his hand as he picked at a green bean casserole sitting by the counter. Hands raised in surrender as he tried to munch the handful of food he snuck into his mouth with a grin. Aunt May watched him walking off towards the stairs with a shake of her head. A question she'd almost forgotten came back though as his foot met the first step of the stairs.
"Oh, Peter! I heard you laughing as you were coning in, were you talking with somebody hun?" Peter bit his lip glancing at Gwen up the stairs before looking back at May.
"No, I was on the phone with somebody. I'll be right back okay? Love you!" She sighed drying her hands off with a towel.
"Alright, love you too. Hurry and get cleaned up so you can eat okay!"
"Got it!"
Peter ran up the stairs throwing his back pack in his room and headed to the bathroom to wash up. Gwen was sitting on the toilet seat when he walked in. she was reading a book like usual, but she glanced up with a warm smile anyways. It was something the real Gwen would do when she waiting for him when they were in high school.
"I told you didn't I?" Her voice bounced in the small room and he groaned turning on the faucet while making strange noises like a grouchy cat.
"Ya, I know, you know everything."
"That's why you're second." He rolled his eyes rolling his neck to the right to glare at her playfully. After all, he wasn't really angry with her, it was only messing around.
"Ha, ha… Keep rubbing it in, you'll see later— You better watch out." She laughed leaning forward on the toilet with a smirk and expressive hands.
"Oooh! I'm so scared!" before he could answer aunt May's voice rang out from downstairs.
"Peter! The food's getting cold!"
Peter dried off and ran downstairs. He was starving and the fact that it was meatloaf didn't bother him so much anymore as his stomach let out a roar to express his hunger at the sight of the food on the table. Aunt May already sitting down and serving their plates. Besides her Gwen was sipping a glass of lemonade all dressed up like usual. Her hair pulled back by her black hair band and a daisy flower pin clipped on the left side of her head.
Peter felt his stomach drop at the sight and felt suddenly sick. But he forced the bile back down and took his seat with a forced smile. Gwen looked up to him concerned, her blue eyes flickered curiously over him in silent observation till aunt May broke the silence and Gwen dug into her plate.
"How was you day?" His eyes flickered between his aunt and his dead girlfriend briefly wondering if he should say anything about his day with Gwen or keep his mouth shut.
"Peter, it's not polite to keep your aunt waiting. Stop ignoring her." He swallowed putting down his fork to reach for the ketchup and glanced at Gwen with a curved brow for a second before squirting an unnecessary amount onto his plate. Gwen made a face making Peter chuckle but he quickly lowered his gaze nervously hoping aunt May didn't think he was crazy.
She eyed him suspiciously before digging back into her food again. Peter coughed trying to fight back another chuckle.
"Well?"
"Oh, I um… I hung around downtown and went to the park today. Thought I'd catch some fresh air for a change, my room was getting kinda stuffy." His aunt smiled at that. It was so easy to come up with the responses she wanted to hear, time only made it easier.
"It's good that you're going out honey, I was beginning to think you'd never leave your room. I know you're still dealing with what happened, but you shouldn't lock yourself away from the world… It's not healthy." Gwen nodded softly taking a sip of her drink.
"See Peter, I told you it's not healthy to waste away in your room." Peter sighed picking at the pool of ketchup on his plate.
"I know, you worry too much…" Aunt May looked up from her plate smiling at his response. Even though he wasn't talking to his aunt he looked up giving her a weak smile.
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After dinner Peter helped put away the left-overs and went up the stairs feeling more drained then when he got home. The act he had to keep up around people was so tiring and he wished everyone could see Gwen like he could for once.
He pulled off his shirt and jeans slipping into another shirt sitting on the bed and some sweats from the closet. Peter's form crashed on the bed trying mold into the plush blankets and pillows. Before he could doze off he saw Gwen set herself besides him. He opened an eye to stare directly at her face. Her nose inches away, and blonde hair spread around the pillow in golden strands.
Fingers reached out lightly trying to trace the soft edges of her face, there was nothing there; he couldn't feel a damn thing. But he imagined the pressure beneath his finger tips, and the familiar scent of her perfume wafted through his nose allowing him to finally fall asleep.
A/N: alright guys just to clarify, everything in itallics is Gwen's voice in Peters mind. Shes not there and shes not a ghost, peteres willing her image around him to cope with her death