Hurting

Kirsten looks so hot when she's drunk.

Ryan rumbles to himself. He always feels guilty for thinking about it. But he wouldn't pass the possibility to comfort himself with another girl or women. And he can do no wrong. It has always worked for him. From Gabrielle he always got second-hand pussy without any efforts. Everytime it proved him right. Caleb is a jerk and this old bastard didn't treat Ryan as his grandson, so he had the right to have sex with Gabrielle.(Damn Marissa!) Eddie is a jerk, too, and Theresa said she didn't want to marry him, so he did nothing wrong having sex with Theresa. He used to love Sandy, but now Sandy becomes a jerk, so he has the right to have sex with Kirsten. He dated Kirsten's sister, so why not have sex with Kirsten?

He's hurt. It's all Marissa's fault. She drags him down. She nearly killed his dear brother! What the fuck did she think she is? It's none of her business! And how dare she reject his gift for Valentine's Day? It's Valentine's day! Did she know how important it is for a guy! She just moaned about Johnny's death? What's the big deal? Johnny deserved to die. He wanted to break their relationship! Stupid Johnny, if he brought Sadie into their life earlier, Ryan could've gotten Sadie and dumped Marissa to him. Ryan couldn't end up lonely, so what the fuck Johnny wanted from Ryan when there's no other girl around Ryan? He had nobody but Marissa at the time!

Volchok is a better guy than Johnny. Volchok chased Marissa only when Ryan got Sadie. Ryan always forgives people easily.(except for Marissa because Marissa's the biggest bitch and never did anything good for him!) Whatever Volchok did to him, he didn't hurt his feeling and didn't break up his relationship with Marissa. Johnny hurt his feeling so Johnny deserved to die. So he told Volchok to take care of Marissa. Everyone should grovel desperately for his forgiveness.

But now Volchok kind of pisses him off. Because Sadie's gone and Ryan is lonely. Why couldn't Marissa get back together with him? Why couldn't Volchok hand Marissa over to him? He's lonely! He has nobody now! Although he had a one-night-stand with a random girl, he's still heartbreaking! How could those ungrateful people stand to see he's lonely and hurting? His dear brother was gone because of the Marissa whore, His dad was in jail, His mother was an alcoholic. Sandy and Kirsten love him, but they never stop him from being hurt. It's ungrateful of them not to take care of him while he went back to Chino 2 years ago and not to allow Sadie to go to Berkeley with them! And Kirsten almost ruined his college life by informing him Theresa had a baby!

How he misses Sadie. He misses how Sadie told him his thing was bigger than Volchok's and her L.A. boyfriend's. They played strip poker again and again, but the game was not interesting anymore. The game had been interesting only when Ryan's seeing Marissa. Sadie's his goddess. She's so pure and innocent. She's a perfect anti-Marissa. She talked about her dead dog, her dead best friend, her dead cousin and her dead dad with smile. He looked affectionately at her face, "people's death is not the big deal. the most important thing is, you couldn't be friend with any other guy when you're taken. " He mentioned Lindsay. He said he missed Lindsay's complain which sounded so beautiful. Sadie asked him whom he loved better, he said he couldn't decide. Sadie was sincerely affected with his honesty. She said she'd love him forever, and she'd never drag him down as Theresa and Marissa did. They laughed at how shameless Theresa and Marissa were. How dare the 2 bitches ask for mercy time after time?

But now Sadie's gone. Ryan kinda wants Theresa or Marissa back. He's lonely and it hurts him most. Lindsay and Sadie are his ture love. They literally saved him. They did everything, everything for him! The most important is they never hurt his feeling! What the Chino whore did is just to lie to him about the baby, what the newport whore did just to shoot his dear brother and screw up his thanksgiving day in Chino! Ungrateful whores! Theresa and Marissa were just rebound girls for him, they wanted to get back together with him all the time, but it worked only when Sadie and Lindsay's gone. What the fuck do they think they are?

Ryan approached Kirsten, and kissed her in the mouth, Kirsten's very, very drunk and doesn't realize what happens......

"What the fuck are you doing!" Sandy comes in when Ryan attempt to strip Kirsten's dress. He shouts out, "Get out from my house!"

Ryan leaves the Cohens in great disappointment, he can't understand what's Sandy angry for. Sandy and Kirsten have falling out now, and Sandy's a jerk now. He had the right to sleep with Gabby because Caleb didn't really love her, he had the right to sleep with Theresa because Theresa didn't love Eddie-- her fiancee, so why doesn't he have the right to sleep with Kirsten when Sandy becomes a jerk now? They are so ungrateful and shameless! How much joy this Chino boy brought them! How could they forget it! They kinda help him, but begrudgingly they resents it and never fails to let people know he is being helped by them. They forget he's from Chino! He's vulnerable! He's from a broken home! Why do they pretend they are his benefactor and savior just because they raised him for only 3 years and pay for his college? He's from Chino! All the world own him a lot!

Where could he go now? Ryan recalls Marissa. That bitch seems to feel gulity about hurting him feeling all the time, it's time to make her feel better. Ryan walks in the direction of Volchok's residence.

"They hurt you for it? " Marissa asked anxiously. Volchok smokes in sillence. Ryan sighs.

Marissa, " I think you can go back to them. They'll forget it. People always remember how nice you are. There's no way you do anything wrong. If there's something wrong, it must be other people's fault."

" But not now." Ryan shrugs, " I have to stay here for a while I think."

"You know what?" Volchok frowns, " If they see you're actually more negatively affected, they'll bring you back instantly. People are not good at understanding emotional hurting. But anyway, we can help. " Volchok draws Marissa aside and whispers in her ear. Marissa nods, saying, "wow Kevin I can really see your growing! "

5 minutes later.

"What the fuck.... You do to me?" Ryan howls, looking at the blood at his crotch." You castrate me? Fuck!"

"Now people can really see your truly losses and feel sympathy for you." Volchok yells at Marissa, "gauze and alcohol! Be quick!"

The pain from his crotch almost makes he faint, but he still shouts," Fuck! You morons are really shallow! Emotional feeling is more deep! Why castrate me? I want my feeling hurt! You fucking ...." he could hold on no longer and fell into blackness, he drowns.

Fin