caitlyn, are there
MONSTERS
in your bed?
ShaneCaitlyn
by Katie
This is INSANELY anti-Shaitlyn. I haven't written anything just straight up angry lately, or broken, and so I wanted to do it.
So enjoy the bitter Shane. :) In fact, just enjoy Shane. I know you guys haven't seen him from me in a while.
And yeah. I apologize that I haven't written for CR in like years.
–
There is nothing like the smell of revenge and cigarettes mixed together on a Saturday night. The underlying scent of cheap wine that you haven't been drinking and punch drunk love. There's also a little bit of bitterness in there but you're Shane Gray and there's no way in hell you're admitting that. Because that's weakness, and that's letting her win.
And that's just plain unacceptable.
–
The day you met was a blur. She ran into you in a mall and said that she loved your new album and wished that she had a voice like yours...well, if she was a guy (nervous giggle). Cute, bubbly, and witty in a silly sort of way. You feel flattered, and then when she smiles at you flirtatiously you have no choice but to smile back. You're Shane Gray and you're gonna keep this one for a while. Because she's pretty and has this dimple on her left cheek.
And freckles by her nose.
–
Summer romance is nice, isn't it? The way her name rolls of your tongue when you're – what's it called, making love or something – is like five shots of 30 proof whiskey. Absolutely nothing like it, the way it simply knocks you off your feet and leaves you unconscious. You are tripping, stumbling, creeping over this one girl and you're not even trying to catch yourself. You're the paparazzi – baby girl, welcome to your fifteen minutes of fame. And it's so so so wrong, because fuck, you're Shane Gray and this should be the other way around.
God, does she have to kiss your neck like that?
–
The leaves are falling off the trees. Kinda like the way her clothes used to just FALL off her frame. She's getting a little used to the party scene, and she's turning into every psycho ex you've ever had. Shane, where are you? Shane, can we go out tonight? Shane? Shane? Shane, bend over a little more, my foot isn't far enough up your ass. SHANE! The dimple on her left cheek and the freckles on her nose used to be cute, and now they make you wanna blow chunks. God, she is such a whore. Did you for real fall for this backstreet scrub? She covers herself with foundation and flashes you those not-so-pearly whites, like it still turns you on. At least she's good in bed though. You're Shane Gray and you like pretending she's someone better than what she is sometimes.
Maybe things would be alright if she took a vow of silence.
–
It takes her a month of not answering her calls to realize that baby girl, Shane Gray took out the trash. She leaves a message on your answering machine that sounds like: FUCK YOU SHANE GRAY I WAS A SAINT, I WOULD HAVE DIED FOR YOU, YOU WERE MY BEST FUCKING FRIEND. And you just laugh and laugh and laugh, because the endless credit card bills you're still getting for her damn Jimmy Choos and Juicy Couture shit tell a different story. And sweetheart, why would Shane Gray need you? He has a joint and his friend Sam Adams to dry his nonexistent tears. You gonna cry, angelface? Shane Gray could care less; karma's a BITCH. Caity the Sweetheart would know about that.
Damn, you love liberation.
–
It's been ten years, and you're married to Caity Jo's BFF (best friend fornever). She's beautiful and funny and legit sweet. She's given you three beautiful kids and helped you clean up your act and still giggles when you flash her that wolfish, "You're gonna get it tonight" look. She has dimples on both cheeks and a mole above her right breast, that you likes to lick in the heat of the night, when she's panting beneath you. She's soft and gentle and sultry beneath the sheets, and she doesn't take your plastic Donna Karan passport for granted. You just wanna say to Caity; "Baby doll, who's the martyr now?"
You love Mitchie will every fiber of your being; and hate Caity that much, too.
–
Not that great, but it's kinda based on a friendship I had that ended so I just wanted to get it off my chest.
Please review with more than "ZOMG GET THERAPY" or "i loved it," or whatever. Thanks.