I don't know why I let him go in the first place.

"I don't have a good feeling about this Finn." I told him. "It's dangerous."

"I know." He whispered. "But I'm sorry Annie, I've got to go. I want to make a difference. I want to help bring him down."

"So do I, but I'm not going! I can help out here! So could you! You could tell them no. It's not too late."

"I'm sorry." He said. I had only one argument left…

"But the baby, Finn…" A few weeks ago, we had found out that I was pregnant. We hadn't announced it yet. I was terrified… But excited. I wanted to have a boy. A little boy with Finn's hair and smile and adorable stubbornness. "What if something happens to you? Do you want them to have to grow up without you? What about me? I can't live without you! I can't!" I began to cry. The idea of life without him was unbearable. A world where he ceased to breathe, where his laugh was silenced, where I would never hear him say my name… I couldn't handle that world. I couldn't handle anything without him.

"I'll be fine, Annie, I promise." He looked like he might cry as well, his eyes sad as he wiped tears off my face. "I'll come back to you. I always do. And if not…" He trailed off, his thoughts somewhere else for a moment. "No. I will come back. And when I do, we'll tell everyone our news." He touched my stomach.

"But… Finn…" I couldn't think. I had a million different things to say to him. A million different ways to ask him to stay, to tell him to go, to tell him that I would never love another man so much as I loved him. But no words would come. He stared at me patiently, waiting for me to make sense of the things in my head. Finally, I spoke. "I love you."

"I love you too." He whispered. "More than you'll ever know." He hummed a song under his breath— a song from home, my favorite song. We had danced to it at our wedding.

He kissed me tenderly, his hands on my face as we fell back onto the bed. We kissed for a few minutes before lying there together, my head resting on his shoulder. He stroked my hair with a gentle hand.

"I should go." He said finally, his voice cracking.

"No." I whispered.

"I've got to, love." I shivered. I clung to him like a stubborn child, my arms wrapped tightly around his neck. He sat up slowly, cradling me close to his body. I was trembling. "I'll be back. I promise."

He kissed me again, whispering quietly in my ear.

"When I get back, the war will be over. We could go home, and live by the ocean again." I could hear the longing in his voice. "Imagine raising Natare in my Father's old house, right on the beach."

"Natare?"

He blushed.

"That's what I wanted to call the baby, if it was a girl." He smiled. "Natare means to swim in Latin. I should have talked to you about it before I got too set on it. Do you like it though? Natare?"

"It's perfect." I kissed him again. I had no idea he had thought about baby names already. "But what about it's a boy?"

"I'll leave that up to you." He said with a grin. His smile only lasted for a moment. Then it began to fade. "I really do have to go, Annie."

I threw my arms around his neck again, quiet sobs shaking my body.

"Be careful."

"I will." His voice trembled. "I'm going to miss you while I'm gone. But things will be even better after I get back. Don't forget that." He sighed shakily. "I love you so much."

"I love you too."

He kissed me one last time, and then he was gone.

I felt empty. I lay in the bed for hours, stroking my stomach, breathing in his scent. Everyday, someone would come to my room, beg me to come out. I didn't. They brought me food. They brought me words of encouragement. But barely any of it cracked my shell. I was oblivious to everything. My hair grew knotted and my clothes were wrinkled. I ate, but only for the baby's sake. Finn would never forgive me if I let it starve.

People told me things, things about the mission, about Finn. But I blocked it all out. Something was wrong, I heard it in their voices. Haymitch yelled at me once.

"God damnit Annie, why won't you listen?" I wouldn't look at him. "We think they're dead, alright? There was a mislabeled pod, the street flooded…" I covered my ears. I did not want to hear. I did not want to know. Finnick had promised me he would come back. So he would. I wouldn't hear otherwise. I shut my eyes and covered my ears and when I opened them Haymitch was gone.

Every time I fell asleep, I would dream of him. Wonderful dreams where everything was perfect. Us by the ocean, living in his father's old house, playing with our child and watching them grow. He was alright, he had to be. But one night, there was a dream that wasn't like the rest.

Finnick and I were swimming in the ocean. There was no land in sight, only sea. Finn was treading water, looking worried.

"What's wrong, Finn?" I asked him, but he didn't answer me. "Finn? Finnick?"

I reached out to touch him, but my fingers slipped through him like he wasn't even there. I screamed. I stared at him, uncomprehending.

"Annie." He said, finally looking at me. "I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"I didn't keep my promise."

I looked at him, confused.

"I don't know what you mean, Finn. You've never broken a promise to me! Remeber when we were kids and…"

"Annie, I'm sorry. I don't have much time." Finally, he swam towards me and placed one of his hands on my face. But I couldn't feel it. It was like he wasn't even there. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too." I said, smiling sadly.

"You're going to make an amazing mother." He told me.

"You're going to be an incredible father." I laughed.

"No." He whispered. "No, I'm not."

"But…"

He kissed me, but again, I didn't feel it.

"I need to go now. You be strong, alright? Be strong for our baby." He closed his brilliant green eyes. "I love you."

"Finnick? What?… No!"

He stopped swimming. His body began to sink into the waves. I reached out, grabbed his hand, but it was no use. He sank into the ocean, and I was alone.

I screamed until my throat was raw. I tried to dive down and find him. I called his name. But only silence answered my cries. Finally, I decided to drown. I stopped swimming. I let myself float there for a moment before taking a deep breath of water. My lungs filled with water. My throat burned. Then I saw him, Finnick, swimming towards me. He took my face in his hands and spoke quietly. Even though we were underwater, I could hear him perfectly.

"No." He shook his head. "No, Annie, not yet. It's not your time."

Suddenly I felt someone grabbing my shoulders, pulling me out of the water and away from Finnick. He stared after me until I broke the surface of the water, and he was gone.

I was coughing violently. My throat burned. When I opened my eyes, I saw not Finnick, but Johanna Mason, crying.

"Why would you do that Annie?" She sobbed. She was holding my head, keeping me out of the water. I was in the bathtub, fully clothed. "Why would you try and drown yourself? Do you have any idea how I felt when I came in here and saw you with your head under the water? Why would you do that?"

I struggled to breathe, choking until I threw up. Johanna swore, and pulled me out of the tub and onto the bathroom floor. The floor was wet too. I realized that the tap was still on, icy water spilling out over the tiles. I trembled as I gasped for air.

"Finnick!" I croaked. Johanna bit her lip.

She wrapped her arms around me, dragging me out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. I sat on the floor, my arms around my legs, my chest still heaving for air. Johanna wrapped a towel around my shoulders.

"Are you alright? Annie? Why were you trying to drown yourself?"

I took a few deep breaths. It was still a struggle.

"He's dead." I groaned when I found the strength. "Isn't he?"

Johanna didn't answer.

"It's okay, Annie, you'll be alright." She hovered over me, unsure of what to do.

"He's dead, Johanna." My voice sounded scratchy.

"Annie… No… He's just…" Her voice trembled.

"DON'T LIE TO ME!" I found myself yelling. I stood up shakily, staring at Johanna, my eyes filling with tears. "HE'S GONE."

Then I collapsed.

When I woke up, I was in the hospital wing. There was an IV in my hand, I stared at it for a while, my mind blank.

"Annie?" I looked up. Johanna sat beside my bed, her eyes red. "Good, you're awake."

Then she started crying.

It was weird to see Johanna cry. I watched her as she buried her face in her hands.

A doctor appeared at the foot of my bed. She looked sadly at me, then at Johanna.

"My name is Dr. Green. It's good to see you awake, Mrs. Odair." I winced at that name. Finnick…

"Annie," Johanna said, her face pained. "Annie, I'm sorry."

"Finnick." I whispered. I remembered the day he left. "He's…"

"Yes." Dr. Green said. "He died. I'm very sorry."

I let out a wail. I knew that. But I didn't want to… I wanted them to tell me I was wrong, to tell me he was on his way back…

"But, we have some good news for you as well." The doctor said with a sad smile. Johanna started sobbing again. "We've discovered that you're pregnant. And, despite your… uh accident, the baby is alive and doing well. It's a miracle, really."

I closed my eyes. The baby will never know its father.

"Do you know the sex of the baby?" I asked quietly.

"Yes." Dr. Green said. "It's a boy."

She bowed her head and left.

Johanna began weeping again. She grabbed my hand.

"Annie I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." She cried. "And now the baby."

"I knew about the baby. He knew about the baby. He wanted to call it Natare if it was a girl. But we never came up with any boys names."

I started sobbing then. Johanna buried her face in the bed, crying silently. She was still holding my hand.

It must have been hours before I calmed down enough to think. Maybe I would drown myself. For real this time. The hospital wing was dark and quiet. Johanna was asleep. I could sneak into the bathroom, and hold my head underwater until I died. But the baby… I was torn. Should I kill myself? Could I? There was a little boy growing inside of me. Finnick's little boy. He had told me to be strong, to be strong for the baby. I had to listen to them. I'd kill myself. But I certainly wouldn't kill our child. I'd live for him. For Finnick, and for the baby. The baby boy… I wished I knew what to name him.

"Johanna," I whispered finally. Johanna looked up at me, her face tearstained."I'm going to name the baby Finnick."