-dives into fandom-
Aw, my first Clack fic. -sniff- I adore this pairing like nothing else, but it figures the first thing I write for them is on the angsty side. Sigh.
There are spoilers for Chapter Six in Crisis Core, so if you're not down with that, you may want to flee. xD
Embrace
When Cloud was accepted to go on a mako excavation mission in Modeoheim with a Turk and first-class SOLDIER, he'd expected to get in there, stand back while the SOLIDER did all the work, and arrive back one miniscule step closer to being in SOLDIER himself.
It did happen like that, sort of – if you didn't count the helicopter crashing and he and the first-class walking ahead of the Turk – Tseng, was it? – and the other cadet like a couple of mountain goats. Finally, his whole childhood in Nibelheim was good for something.
It didn't really surprise him too much that Zack was the SOLIDER with them. There were only a handful of first-class SOLDIER's; his hero, Sephiroth (who he was sure would never be on such a minor mission like this), and two others that he'd barely heard of, but their names went in one ear and out the other.
Zack was really different than how he'd pictured a first-class should be. He'd heard that Zack always had a smile on his face, no matter what he was up against, but somehow...it was just nicer to see and believe it in person. Cloud had had little smile about until he met the person behind that infectious grin.
And there was something about him that was so easy to open up to, even though they'd just met. He hadn't told anyone since arriving at Shinra that he was from Nibelheim – it wasn't a big secret, he'd just never felt the need to tell anyone. But Zack had been genuinely interested; he could tell. He trusted that SOLIDER from the moment he took off his helmet and Zack did those ridiculous little squats, proclaiming they were 'backwater boys' – which wasn't a bad thing to be called, considering Zack called himself that too.
He was also the first one to believe in him. It didn't matter that they'd just met – Zack believed he could do it. As long as he kept going for it, nothing else mattered.
Embrace your dreams.
Zack didn't even mind when Cloud and Tseng sat pathetically in the bathhouse hall, looking roughed up from fighting all of the monsters that kept appearing. He just made sure they were safe – even though it technically wasn't his duty – and walked alone into the other room.
Cloud didn't know what happened in there, and wasn't sure he ever wanted to find out. He felt sick, like he was about to pass out. He briefly heard the sounds of battle, silence, and then what sounded like muffled sobs. But SOLDIERS weren't supposed to cry...were they?
He didn't see any tears in Zack's eyes when he emerged from the room. He did see the huge sword held protectively in his hands and the scar on his cheek. For some reason, seeing that scar made his stomach clench painfully, as though he could see the true pain it hid. Something else had changed, too, but he couldn't tell what. It bothered him that he didn't know. He felt as though he had to – needed to.
Tseng opened his mouth to ask something, but Zack just shook his head, utter desolation in his eyes. He barely glanced at either of them as he started walking out of the bathhouses, his fists clenched as though he was holding back.
It's okay, Cloud wanted to say. I'm here.
But they'd just met. It wouldn't mean anything.
As they arrived outside and a new helicopter came to take them back to Midgar, Cloud glanced at Zack and saw him release a single, white feather into the sky.
--
He still didn't see Zack cry, not even went he ran into him in the Shinra building and found him sitting in a chair in a deserted area of the SOLIDER floor, although the first-class certainly looked as though he'd been doing nothing but sobbing.
Cloud approached him carefully, not wanting to overstep his bounds – Zack was hurting, but at the end of the day, he was still his superior. He quietly sat down next to the other; not saying a word, just simply sat there. Zack's breathing was deep and even as though he were trying to calm himself down, even though he seemed pretty composed at the moment. He was holding the sword he had come out of the bathhouse with, staring at it like he was trying to ask it something.
He had no idea if Zack knew he was there the whole time or not, but at some point, the other seemed to finally calm himself down, whether because it was something in the sword or because Cloud was there, or something else entirely. In any case, he eventually set the sword down and turned to the blond, an utterly lost look crossing his face – like a puppy, Cloud decided, although Ifrit would freeze over before he said that out loud.
Zack stared at him for what felt like an eternity. It was nothing like how a superior was supposed to look at a lowly cadet; Cloud could see those glowing mako eyes clearly enough, despite the emotion clouding them. He didn't look away when Zack suddenly put a hand over his. It was a simple gesture, but somehow they'd both known they'd needed it just then. It was...comforting, somehow.
The raven-haired SOLDIER let go quickly, though, and looked away, acting as though he was about to stand up. Something stopped him and in a flash, he embraced Cloud, clutching him as though the blond were his last tie to sanity.
Cloud froze, not really used being hugged, but when Zack didn't let go, he tentatively hugged him back, relaxing in the gesture a lot more easily than he thought he would've. If anyone passed them, they would've thought they were just two friends, hugging for whatever reason friends would, but this...this was more than that. He knew that much.
Zack continued to cling to him tightly, muttering something under his breath that Cloud didn't quite catch when he finally let go. He looked at the sword again for a moment before grabbing it and standing up slowly, perfectly aware that the blond was still staring at him.
"Hey Cloud..."
His breath hitched. "Yeah?"
"...Embrace your dreams. Even if they change..." He looked over his shoulder, his mako eyes burning. "...Never let go." He gave Cloud another glance and walked off.
Then...
Don't let me go.
Sigh. -sobs- And that's how the aftermath should have gone. Nyeah.
Angeal's death just moved me so much. I was crying buckets when I got to that point in the game. And when I cry, apparently I sob out fics...not that I'm complaining. I hope you guys don't either. xD
I plan on writing more Clack, hopefully lots of fluff (they deserve it!), so keep a look out if you'd like. :D
Reviews for this would be lovely! -glomp-