Disclaimer: Do not own. YOU MUST HAVE READ MORT HAS VISIOTRS FIRST! if you want. please don't hit me...
Mort was wandering in the park, arguing with the narrator. He was quite content. Just a walking' and a swaying', thinking about his corn, not noticing the odd looks he was receiving from protective mothers or the audience who want to know where the HELL this park came from…the usual.
Mort: YOU LIIIIIIIIE!
Narrator: Oh come on, all I did was say I did not love Him…
Mort: That's another issue. But for now, you said I was content!
Fan Girls: He is nay content! HE is nay content?
Audience: What is with the "nays"?
Fan Girls: He is sophisticated and there for we-eth say nayeth. For lo, yonder is a clothes store, let us entereth it….
Narrator: Had to get rid of them SOMEHOW….anyway, why are you um, "nay" content my dear little Mort, who be but a puppet of my keyboard…
Mort: I'll ignore some of the larger words in that sentence. But I am not happy since he-who-destroyed-my-just-about-happy-home still lives. HE LIVES! He walks this earth! He should at least have the decency to limp!
Narrator: Great. Go all psycho on such a nice day. Anyway, it's not like Ted destroyed your home…it WAS your wife who fu-
Audience backs away andstart taking down glass bottles from saloon shelf...
Narrator: Ahem. Ted ruined your 'happy' home. Just breathe Mort…
Mort: Thanks. I always forget about the whole breathing thing. Well, what am I to do about it? You all have time to kill? Or Ted to kill…heheheheheheh. Muhahahaha. MUHAHAHAH-
Narrator: That's enough Mort!
Mort: Aaaaw…being evil is fun, stupid cow…
Audience: Narrator- violence is not the answer! Don't do it!
Narrator: Oh what do you care?
Fan Girls: Ahem. WE care. And that is "WE" as in "Around a million mort mad girls with rich fathers and have all sworn to protect Him"
Audience: Yeah. That's a little to smart for them to realise by themselves, they may have had some outside help…
All heads turned just in time to see a guilty white rabbit jumping into a little hole…
Mort: That would not be a good idea. NOT A GOOD IDEA! Narra-where has she gone?
Audience: Oh god…
Distant voice of narrator: Hey mort! Teeeed is doooown heeeere! And a variety of sharp objects! Hard decision!
Audience: Well, there goes Mort. The narrator is so damn evil and surprisingly persuasive. The fan girls have gone too. It is left to us to remain dignity around here…
Narrator: Come now or I shall kick your figurative butts…
Audience: SIR YES SIR!
And with all down the little rabbit hole (how did they fit? No, really? Do rabbits just MAKE holes so people can jump into them to fulfil their psychotic fantasies of killing a guy named Ted?) The journey of Mort, an evil whore so ironically called "Narrator", a VERY annoying audience, fifty crazed anorexics and an evil sheep who had hopped along for the ride. Okay, there is no evil sheep. But who knows what they could find down there? It could be dangerous! And no one brought any spare healthy snack or jumpers! Or a first aid kit! They are going to die!
Continued after the break….