'I don't own anything'

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, for some god awful and screwed up reason I need to be horny, on an invader Zim fanfiction high, or struck with brilliance with a computer nearby to type. ALL of which failed to happen because

1. I was on my period and I don't like to get too horny on my period.

2. YOU PEOPLE HAVEN"T UPDATED ENOUGH!! I'VE BEEN READING HERMOINE/FRED WEASLY HARRY POTTER SMUT!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT DOES TO PEOPLE??!?!?

3. eh, some random god like entity hasn't given me an idea.

In fact I am neither of those reasons typing, no I am doing this so people will know that I didn't die.

In a large underground cavern there is a small group of beings.

A young boy with scythe like hair that gave off an air of intelligence and insanity, like, what a mad scientist's aura would feel like,

a young girl with purple hair and squinted eyes and a presence that could make a million toddlers cry for there mothers and have squirrels explode on contact with the evil fog surrounding her,

a very short green male alien with a napoleon complex that gave off an air of intelligent stupidity, you know like how geniuses make a dooms day device but don't plug it in or die of starvation because they forgot to eat.

Another green alien this one female with purple eyes and a bit taller that seemed to ooze an aura that was dominant and pissed and seeking vengeance on someone.

A pair of matching red and purple green aliens that were really tall, stood, err, hovered side by side, doing the amazing feat of giving off an air of power and stupidity at the same time. And love of doughnuts? Man, I didn't think you could do that.

Next there was a robot with blue eyes that was insane.( sorry I can't do anything cool with him, he 's just there.)

And last but not least there was a robot with a gun for an arm giving off an air of anger and hate.

"All you see is dark. And you can here nothing. It is as silent as the grav-"

"Where is ZiiiiIIIIiiiiiiimmmmmmm? And why are you narrating in such a strange manner?"

"Never mind."

Suddenly flood lights illuminated the cavern causing the participants to blink. I stood in the middle of the cavern facing the Invader Zim cast.

"Hello my name's Minus Your Plus I am the torturer of cartoon couples; I am here to scar you all."

Red: "What Couples? There are no couples in this cartoon."

Purple; "YEAH!"

Dib; why is Zim here? He can love?

Zim; The ZIM can Lurve! I will Lurve you all to Death and take over the world! HA HA HA HA!

Gaz; I love no one, I only hate.

Tak; "Why am I here? I was only in one episode.

Gir; "Cause you're a hot alien lady!"

The occupants of the room turn to stare at Gir.

MYP; um, o.k. the reason that you are all here is that there are no couples in Invader Zim.

Red; I said that

Purple; HE SAID THAT

Red; Shut up purple.

Myp; Going on. I will give you all a partner and once I do my crazy powers will take over and Doom you to cuddling and have awkward situations against your will!

Everyone but MYP; WHAT! (Gir really said yay! and Mimi can't talk but hey! I tried.)

Dib; You can't do that! Wait are you a ZaDr Fan!?!? Oh my god if you make me kiss Zim I will dissect you and unleash my evil Hallowineens on you from my head! MY HEAD IS NOT BIG!

Gaz; You will not include me in this madness. If you do I will throw you into a nightmare world worse than HELL!

Gir; I Gets to smooch somebodys!

Zim; I will do this lurve and I will use the knowledge to concur the world!

Red; what is love anyway? Is it edible?

Purple; Protect the doughnuts!

Tak; If I get Zim, I will kill him, than I will kill you.

Mimi whipped out her gun arm thing and waved it menacingly.

MYP; SILENCE! I will pick the couples and the moment I do your bodies will take over and you will seduce the Female or male the only way you can.( I grinned evilly and scared Gir)

MYP; Red! you now have the hots for PURPLE!

The moment I said those words, Red's eyes got bigger and he turned toward a shocked Purple. A grin spread across is mouth and he hovered slowly toward Purple and gently took one of his antennas in his two fingered hand and fondled it making Purple purr.

Purple; W-what are you d-doing Red?

Red; something that I really wanted to do to you since I had seen you at the academy all those years ago.

Red than pulled the antenna down causing Purple's head to tilt upward and Red who had been hovering a little higher than him to kill him. There was obvious tongue use and Purple jerked away gasping for air, and all Red did was move to his throat, licking and sucking his way down.

I snapped my fingers and a door frame opened in the air and through the frame you could see a red and purple bed with Irken champagne and alien flower pedals sprinkled on it.

MYP; this is your room. Enjoy Purple, Red!

Red stopped his kissing and gave me a smug smile.

Red; Will do.

He scooped a stuttering Purple up in to his arms and hovered through the frame. I closed admittedly.

Everyone was staring after them in shock. I cleared my throat and they turned toward me

MYP; well, that was hotter than I expected. I wonder where he learned that. Is there alien soap operas?