I tried to write this not so much as a horror but as something concerning, causing uneasiness. These dark themes often come to my mind when I think about Remus and his story. I sympathize with him and adore him so much. Yes, I know he is imaginary, but his fate resembles to many fates I see around me every day.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing and I know nothing, as usual.
-It is an extremely rare formula. And extraordinary. The results promised should be outstanding.
-What kind of results? Mental? Physical?
-Both, my sweet lady, both. The uplifting of spirit and senses, all the ferocity and wits of a wild animal.
-Without any side effects?
-Not that I know of. And it takes only a little patience, if you were to say this project has your attention. I am willing to make it my absolute priority. Just think about it. It would be your little secret advantage. My discretion is certain, of course.
-You are being drunk, kind sir. Drunk on wine and imagination. If the formula ever existed, it is long time gone. Still, I will rise, formulas or not.
-No doubt, my beautiful. But I remind you, what is lost today can be re-discovered tomorrow.
-Jord, how do you plan getting your samples? Experimenting on people is illegal. And I doubt that any of… them will be keen to cooperate with you.
-I beg your pardon, my lady, those are not people. They are possessed, wicked, not meant to live among us. Their situation is tragic, indeed, and a merciful end is a gift to them. Not our compassion. Imagine, the only way to get rid of this horrible disease is to get rid of all of them. With the current state of anti-werewolf politic, who knows, tomorrow it may be legal to own one, and the day after to kill one. Please, my gorgeous, we should carefully spare our kindness for our own kin.
-I've never thought about them in that way. Actually, I've never thought about them at all. They're a minority. Hardly anybody sees them, therefore nobody cares. One or two missing, nobody notices.
-That's what I mean, exactly.
-But to dream about some formula is useless. It is a delirious fantasy, to pine for easy way to power. These thoughts are dangerous. I will hear no more of it. And if they are cursed, the potion may be cursed too. It may turn a person into some creature. I can't risk that.
-Open your mind, darling. Authority, supremacy, your strength mysterious and feared. I can get you where nobody else can…
Darkness... darkness and inability to move. Deadly quiet around. Is he dead now?
Fast pounding in his head, the body reacts to unknown danger, releases adrenaline. Tension and stress fill him within milliseconds. Is he dying? His heart is racing and fear spreads in his mind, begging his body for some reaction, any reaction. But he simply can't, his arms and legs seem unreachable. If he could move just a little… only an eyelid or a little finger… he must at least acknowledge if he still exist.
Is this how an eternity feels like?
But then there was an answer from his muscles. He suddenly gained control, he felt his body, all covered in panic. He clenched his fists and tried to push himself to sitting position, expecting relief, expecting it was all but a nightmare, but something stopped him. He opened his eyes wide and what he dimly saw scared him even more.
The room was simple, hospital-like, with tiles on the walls. There were no windows, but some indefinable light was still present, lazily sneaking from somewhere behind a plastic curtain. The only furniture was a simple white table at his left side… and one simple bed. In which he was laying. If this is a hospital, he is the patient here.
He was naked, and tied to bed firmly with long thick leather stripes. He tried to understand, to put a hand on this situation, to explain the visions he now sees to his brain, but he failed. Do something. His body demanded. Save me right now. Do something. Save me or I will scream. I will panic. I will raise hell.
He tested his restrains with all the power of his body but no movement was possible. He tried again, and again, but he felt like a flea trying to escape from a glass jar. He can push and he can kick all he wants, until he will drop tired to death. There was no sense to it. What happened to him? He could not recall. Did he attack somebody? Did he kill somebody? Is this some kind of prison? Did they kidnap him, expecting some reward for him, or information that he holds? He seemed to be alone, but eventually somebody must come.
And so he did.
He just started to get really chilly, when he heard the door shut in the distance. He almost stopped breathing as he concentrated on the sound of a person shuffling around the room behind the plastic curtain, opening drawers and boxes, rustling with paper, and probably moving some instruments around. He didn't think it was a good idea to scream, or to try to shout at the person. The person sure knows very well that he's in here, and why. He dreaded the person and began to feel sick, like he will just vomit if the person enters the room.
Without any explanation, the man in white overall suddenly appeared from behind the curtain. He looked uninterested, like if it was a regular day for him. He carried some instruments and began placing them side by side on the table. There were some tubes, plastic bags, metallic cases, and other tools he couldn't identify.
Remus couldn't stand it any longer. "Where am I?" he asked, "and who are you? Why won't you let me go?"
The man gave him one brief look with an eyebrow raised but said nothing. Then he went back to his strange preparations.
"Hey, talk to me! This must be some kind of misunderstanding, I don't belong here, I haven't done anything! I have friends who will search for me, is this some kind of joke? Please, let me out of this and I am sure I can explain everything! Somebody made a mistake!"
The man gave a slight sigh and went back behind curtain. Remus heard him opening a drawer. When he came back, he held a piece of cloth and a tape.
"What are you doing? You can't do this to me, I am a free man! Stop it, you can't!"
But the man grabbed his jaw and held it open, and began stuffing the cloth in his mouth. Remus tried to protest, to scream, but he was firmly tied and helpless. It felt like hell, dry rag uncomfortable, and his mouth already starting to ache. The man finished his job with the duct tape. Remus was ashamed that someone sees him like this, that somebody is able to do this to him, without even telling him what is happening. He would rather die than face such a humiliation.
The man returned to the table and chose some item from the case. He unpacked it and Remus saw it was a large needle. At that moment he was already mad with panic, he just wished to fall asleep, to faint and wake up somewhere beautiful, even if imaginary… He shook his head fiercely as the man came closer to him with the needle, now attached to the thin tube, because he understood now what it is that this man wants from him. The man grabbed his arm and attached it even more firmly to the bed. He held it tight while the needle pierced the skin on the inside of the elbow. Remus felt pain and tears fell down his cheeks. He watched as his blood started to flow away from his body. He sobbed. Will this kill him, or will the man keep him alive? How long for?
The blood began to fill the plastic container on the other side of the tube. With the satisfied look, the man disappeared behind the curtain, where he made some paperwork, humming to himself. As the blood was leaving his body, Remus started to feel dizzy and numb. His consciousness was somehow misty, he tried to breathe deeply so he wouldn't faint. When the man finally returned, his sight was fading to blackness. But the man undid the tube and stopped the blood flow. Then he took the plastic container now filled with fresh blood and left again, without a single word. In the next room, separated by the curtain, he started working. Remus saw soft orange light, which probably meant that the man had made a small fire. He heard him opening, pouring, gently chopping different things.
The man's activity continued for about half an hour, as long as Remus could tell. In the end there was only soft bubbling and satisfied humming. By that time Remus realized he was cold, and starving. Although he was used to feel discomfort in his body, at least it was always only his own body who was torturing him. Until now. Now he was in the hands of some mad stranger, and this was danger he could not control.
His thoughts were interrupted by the incoming of another person. Remus heard his firm steps and then loud knocking on the door. The man answered the door, but Remus couldn't hear clearly what they were talking about. He managed to catch some words when they came closer, probably to examine the results of experiment of Remus's capturer.
"I don't think I need to tell you that this is not how it's supposed to look like," said the new stranger. It was also a man, his voice was deep and authoritative.
"I'm well aware of that, sir. But it is for you to judge, how far are we from desired substance. As you know, the instructions are not very clear. I will need a few more attempts, so I can compare my results. Did you find some more subjects for me? This one will not last forever. And he doesn't even look usable. I thought we were to extract the ferocity and power of the rough animal. This one is not even scary. If I saw him on the street I would give him a penny."
The stranger cleared his throat. "He has the blood, and the blood is all we need. Anyway, try to get as much out of him as you can. I do not buy them in the grocery store. I am still facing slight trouble finding someone willing to test the substance. We can't feed it back to our Subject One, we need somebody clean."
"Of course. I understand."
Then they walked outside of the room, still talking, but Remus could not hear them anymore. But he knew that this was madness. This is it, he was doomed. He will die as Subject One, nobody will give him any chance to explain that he is actually a human being. He tried to comprehend the situation, to prepare for the worst, but his brain refused. He was always treated like something less than human, but never like a feelingless creature. Many people considered him a monster and now somebody fulfilled this idea by torturing him heartlessly. Do his dreams, his soul and his past mean nothing to this cruel man? He is not an animal, he doesn't deserve to die like this. He knew he will die once, everybody does, but he is now going to leave this world without any dignity or a chance to make his peace. It was Remus's deepest fear to be dehumanized for his condition. Maybe this is awaiting every werewolf. That sickened him.
The man returned alone. He appeared from behind the curtain with another piece of cloth in his hand. He poured some liquid on it and casually pressed it over Remus's nose. The unnatural aggressive smell made him terrified, but not for long. He almost instantly lost consciousness.
When he woke up, he was in another dark room, which looked like a cell. On the floor was a bottle of water and some bread. The air was wet and smelled like a cellar. He wondered if he should eat. If he doesn't, everything will end much sooner. He was now well aware of his situation and his mind was clear and determined. He didn't touch the food. Instead he looked around the room, but there wasn't much to examine. One wooden desk for a bed, and one hole to pee.
He should kill himself while he is capable of it.
He paced the empty room in desperation for a while, but gave up after some time. His mind started to fall apart again. He wished so much to solve his horrible situation. It was hard to measure time in an empty room. Finally, he laid down and fell into a restless sleep.
When he woke up, the nightmare continued. The room, the bed, and the man fastening him to it. Then the needle and the pain.
He took two samples that day. At least Remus thought that it is another day. His hunger and thirst tortured him, due to the blood loss he could not think clear anymore. He just survived in the delirious state and didn't have strength to care anymore. When he was thrown in the cell again, the man didn't even need to put him to sleep. Remus let himself be half dragged and half carried. Crying, he crawled on the floor to the bowl of water and drunk it hastily. He gave up, and also ate the bread. His instincts were leading him now, and he wanted to survive so much. To take his right to fight for life, this belongs to every creature.
This time, he seemed to be in his cell for a longer period of time. It seemed like an eternity, nameless hours passed around him. He must have been asleep, because another bowl of water and piece of bread appeared. He devoured them like an animal, the thought of it made him laugh. So, an animal, after all.
Is somebody searching for him? They must be, his friends… He clanged to this poor hope, because it was the last hope he had.
When the man came for him again, Remus was awake. He stared right at him when the door opened. The man seemed uncomfortable about it, he avoided his eyes and carefully approached him with the wand in his hand. He casted a spell that made Remus's mouth firmly closed and his hands twisted behind his back. Like this, the man dragged him through the hall. He finally noticed the surroundings of his room. He knew that this can't be legal, the place was old and obviously abandoned. It could be an old muggle hospital or some other sort of health care institution.
This time it was different. The procedure made him sick and weak, as before, but this time it was worse. He could feel it, he could feel the life draining from his body. He was not made to endure such torture. Suddenly the thoughts crept inside his mind, the thoughts of dying. It was a fact, death was closer to him than ever.
The procedure was finished, and he was left alone, while the man hid behind a curtain, making his weird experiments. Time passed and Remus stared in the emptiness of his room. The thoughts about his suffering were interrupted by knocking on the door. Somebody was visiting the man again. Remus didn't allow himself to hope for a rescue, the knock sounded like a usual one, without any haste or nervosity. The man was obviously not expecting anyone, because his activity changed to busy running around, probably to quickly create an illusion of order by stuffing things into drawers. Finally, he went to answer the door. But Remus didn't hear any talk.
Only thing that could be heard was slow footsteps, making their way along the room. Remus held his breath.
"What is the meaning of this?" The voice belonged to a woman.
The man cleared his throat. "Everything is to yours prosper only, miss." He tried to sound calm.
"I didn't ask for any of this. Who gave you orders? I can't believe you did something behind my back. Is it something illegal? Whatever you are doing here, put a stop to it. A scandal is the last thing I need right now."
The woman was really close to the curtain now. He could see the shadow of her body, the lean straight figure.
"But… I may be really close to something, something important! You will see, my queen, you will thank me later. Jord has even gotten me the first subject, for the first time in my life I am free to experiment! This will get you so far, just wait and see…"
"I beg your pardon?"
"I mean, this will make you better than anybody else…"
"Oh, shut up about it already. What have you said about the subject?"
For a few seconds there was silence. Then Remus heard quick footsteps, almost running, and the shadows came closer. The curtain parted swiftly, and a pale woman all in black appeared from behind it. Her eyes opened wide at the sight of him, and she stared at him, frozen. The man emerged right after her and eyed her cautiously, trying to predict her reaction. He was wise enough to say nothing. This woman was important to him, Remus supposed he did this to him only to impress her.
She didn't seem impressed. She still stood in the same place, although her face changed from shocked to indifferent. The man couldn't take it anymore and he broke the silence.
"Nobody will miss this one. Jord arranged everything. There's no need to worry,things are under my control."
The woman looked at him and shook her head in the mocking way.
"The unworthy death for an unworthy creature," she said, now almost smiling. The man instantly cheered up. "Yes, yes, you are absolutely right," he exhaled in relieve.
"I didn't mean him," said the woman and all of the sudden, she pulled a gun from her jacket. Without hesitance, she fired it and the noise was so loud it made Remus half deaf for a moment. It echoed in the small room, like if the sound refused to leave. The man collapsed on the floor, the red mark on his forehead. He must have been dead at once, he didn't move and his eyeballs turned up.
Then she turned her attention back to Remus. He tried to think quickly, to not be afraid, because whatever will come now, from his position he can't do anything about it. Yet he shook in terror and his heart raced. The woman hid the gun and pulled a knife instead. She cut through the restrains that were bounding him and he curled on the bed, hiding his nakedness. He wanted so much to trust this woman, even if it was crazy to trust anybody in this cursed place. She was young, dressed in man-like clothing, but with a soft face.
When she spoke at last, she sounded tired. "This is unforgivable," she said, "it's a sin against humanity. But this is what we are."
She wrapped him in the sheet and lifted him in her arms without any trouble.