Title: Essential
Author: Mindy
Rating: K
Disclaimer: Characters are borrowed without permission. Lyrics belong to Pete Murray and are borrowed without permission.
Spoilers: "Midnight".
Summary: Doctor/Donna. Donna POV. Takes place as the Doctor returns at the end of "Midnight".
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"I love it, and how you clear my way,
Guide me into a brand new day.
And your eyes, you know I've found my place,
I see you, you are my saving grace.
Don't ever want to miss you,
Don't ever want to forget you.
The way you are today…"
It was only when she laid her arms around him that it even occurred to her to wonder what might have happened. It was only when she clapped eyes on him again, weary and shell-shocked, that Donna even allowed herself to consider the idea that the Doctor might not have returned. The thought was terrifying, shocking, inconceivable.
Generally, she was not a demonstrative person. Her upbringing had lacked a lot of affection. So she surprised herself when she opened her arms wide and took him in. They'd hugged before, of course, many times. The Doctor was very affectionate in that way and it was something she'd quickly become used to. But they'd only ever embraced in moments of spontaneous jubilation or relief -- tightly but always briefly.
What surprised Donna more was how fervently the Doctor returned her embrace, this time. He did not make a joke and propel them onto the next big venture. In fact, he didn't utter a word. For long moments, he didn't loosen his hold on her or let go. And that's when she finally realised.
The first time they met, she'd told the Doctor he needed someone. But she'd never, for a second, thought that someone might be her. She hadn't believed herself strong enough, brave enough, special enough for that position. But as she felt his twin heartbeats calm and his hands clasp her robe, she understood for the first time that the Doctor didn't need just anyone.
He needed her – specifically, deeply, inscrutably. To him she was someone. Right now, she was his someone and Donna had never been that to anybody.
She'd never been needed – never been honestly and intrinsically necessary to any person, particularly someone as extraordinary as the Doctor. This strange man -- so tenacious, so ambiguous, so wise and otherworldly -- for whatever reason, he required her comfort, her support, her presence, her belief. And her arms holding him securely til he was brave enough to let go.
It filled her with a sense of significance, of purpose that was unlike anything she'd ever experienced and, in that moment, Donna glimpsed herself through her friend's eyes. Maybe the Doctor was as right about her as he was about everything else. It was entirely possible that she was brave and special and brilliant and magnificent and all the things he so flippantly rattled off on a daily basis.
She'd always thought he was teasing her, or being kind. She'd never really known why, out of the whole wide universe, he'd picked her, why on earth he'd wanted her to accompany him. She'd never known what exactly she'd done to earn her place at his side or what she contributed in return.
As she held him in patient silence, feeling his chest expand against hers and his body relax, Donna closed her eyes. The truth was, she had never been destined for anything else. She'd never wanted anything as much as she'd wanted back aboard that daft ship after she'd missed her chance. Nothing in her whole mundane life had ever felt so right, so essential, and she never felt like she'd belonged anywhere as much as she belonged in the Tardis with the Doctor, hurtling blindly through time and space.
So for this one silent moment, for this enigma who'd become her best friend and saviour, she would allow herself to be essential. And for the first time in her life, Donna Noble knew how it felt to be exactly where she was meant to be -- and to be with the one person in the entire cosmos with whom she truly belonged.
END.