Secrets Revealed
Secrets Revealed
Secret no. 1
Kai: -drum roll- Who's the father of Rose's baby? DAN-DAN-DAN-DAAAN
Kaito: -irritated- What's up with this again? I didn't know anything about this, you suddenly dragged me here.
Kai: Oh yeah, this is the 'Secrets Revealed'
Kaito: -frowns- I know, I asked what's up with this again?
Kai: Aren't you even curious about who's the father of the baby of Rose?
Kaito: Of course, I'm curious, who wouldn't? It's not even revealed, I think, according to my researches and--
Kai: That's enough, you're being the researcher guy again, we're here revealing secrets not researching so throw that folder away - grabs folder from the hands of Kaito and throws it away-
SUSPECT NO. 1 The Egg Head High Priest
Kaito: Egg head?
Kai: Yah, the 'Espasol' guy.
Kaito: -scratches the back of his head- What? I know that's a food, what part of the anime?
Kai: The first part, the first villain to show up
Kaito: Oh yeah, that 'Espasol' guy, now I remember
SUSPECT NO. 2 Edward Elric
Kaito: -raises an eyebrow-
Kai: What? It can be a possibility.
Kaito: Can you even read the title that says 'Secrets Revealed'?
Kai: Yeah, why?
Kaito: -eyes twitching- This is hopeless, It says REVEALED not POSSIBILITIES, search the dictionary
Kai: Eeeehhh??
Kaito: Then we have to interview the characters after this.
Kai: We better, thinking gives me headaches
SUSPECT NO. 3 Scar-san
Kaito: They just met
Kai: Well, it could be a possibility
Kaito: What's this? Baby-at-first-sight?
Kai: You could say that…
Kaito: You mean, They just saw each other then suddenly a baby appeared between them?
Kai: Could be…
Kaito: This is really hopeless
SUSPECT NO. 4 Envy
Kaito: Uh-huh? – raises an eyebrow-
Kai: Well… Envy disguised as Egg head, right?
Kaito: Okay, you got a point, now the Interview begins
INTERVIEW
Kai: -TRIES to be formal- ahem, ahem…
Kaito: STOP YOU EGG HEAD – Chases Egg Head-
Egg Head: Nooooo!! You'll never take me aliiiiiive…
Kaito: -Gets something from the pocket of his jeans- Then you'll never have this agaaaaaiiiiiiin –shows the Red Stone-
Kai: You had that all along?
Kaito: I told you, I also research
Kai: Whatever, now Egg Head-san—
Egg Head: Ask me anything, and I'll answer
Kai: Okay, okay, just stop cutting me off, now, Egg Head-san, Are you the father of Rose's baby?
Egg Head: What?? She has a baby?
Kaito: Okay, he's not the one, GLUTTONY!! LUST!! –Gluttony and Lust appeared out of nowhere-
Lust: What is it?
Kaito: You could continue the scene where he is about to be eaten in the anime
Lust: Ok, anything else? –grabs Egg Head-
Kaito: Nope, nothing at all.
Gluttony: Lusto?
Egg Head: No! You promised…
Kaito: Nope, I didn't, I just said, you'll never have this again, hmmm… it seems it's true, you'll never really have this again –shows the red stone- besides haven't you read our pen name? It says 'mischievous twins' not any other
Lust: Come Gluttony, our show was cut because of these mischievous twins
Kaito: You can thank us
??: Yare, Yare, How troublesome.
Kai: Hey, how did you get here, Shikamaru?
Shikamaru: Oh sorry, I thought this was our studio, sorry, -muttered to himself- This is getting troublesome by the minute –exits the stage-
Kai: This show's getting weirder every minute
Kaito: You're telling me – muttered Kaito- Okay, the next suspect… Edward Elric –grabs him out of nowhere-
Edward: -scratches the back of his head, confused- What am I doing here?
Kaito: We're here to ask you a question, Edward.
Kai: You're being formal.
Kaito: Who cares? Anyways, are you the father of Rose's baby?
Edward: -raises her eyebrows- Why don't you ask her? As if I'm the mother of the baby
Kai: -to Kaito- He could be a possibility
Kaito: Well, we need to mark him then?
Kai: Of course, -turns to Edward and smiles – Thank you, Edward, I'm very sorry that Kaito just dragged you out of nowhere
Edward: Nah… It's okay, I better go – went out of the stage – troublesome twins
Kaito: You're being me
Kai: I'm sorry
Kaito: See? You're being me. Stop that
Kai: The what?
Kaito: WTF? Being me…
Kai: You're also being me
Kaito: It's just a payback
Kai: Whatever, Sorry about that, when our mood swings struck, I have Kaito's attitude and he has my attitude, so sorry about that again, anyways, NEXT
Kaito: -sighing- Scar-san!! I know you're hiding…
Scar-san: -chuckles- You'll never see me.
Kai: Oh really? –using the same tone in his voice-
Kaito: I can see your butt behind the crates but I can't see your face, anyways, nice hiding spot, I can spot you easily, thanks for not making my work troublesome –mutters to himself- damn, I'm getting the troublesome phrase right now! –pulled Scar-san behind the crates-
Scar-san: -readies his alchemy-
Kaito: -readies a cell phone- I'm going to tell the military that you are here, let's just say a tip
Kai: Like in the restaurant? Cool!
Kaito: Not that!
Kai: Well, I thought tips are only used for luxurious restaurant waiters? Are they waiters? Oh-oh! Also tell them I want some pasta
Kaito: Whatever! I have no time explaining things right now… So, back to Scar-san, are you the father of Rose's baby?
Scar-san: How can that happen? What is that, a baby-at-first-sight?
Kaito: You just proved my point!
Kai: Hey! Are you saying I don't have any point in publishing this?
Kaito: Could be…
Scar-san: You mean, Yes it is, cause it's minus one, I better go, I have to finish this philosopher's stone first –walks out of stage-
Kai: Hmph! Hey, I remembered something, you said 'you got a point' somewhere here
Kaito: Well, it's just once, so 1-10, so no big deal
Kai: Well… aren't you gonna call Envy?
Kaito: Okay –pulls another identical twin and gasps- We have another twin brother? I mean, we're triplets?
Kai: Hm? I didn't know that, surely mom or dad must have told us, I know we have 1 younger sibling and 2 elder siblings, I think he's a half-brother, tsk, tsk, tsk, dad's hormones should really be kept in check even if he's already near his 50's
Kaito: Kai, would you please stop rambling things that shouldn't be said in here?
Kai: Okay… so who are you, you imposter, you copy cat, you doppelganger, you—
Kaito: Kai, would you please shut up and keep quiet for a minute?
Kai: -automatically shuts up-
Kaito: So –turns to the doppelganger- imposter, reveal yourself, for showing like that is cowardice, Envy
Envy: -smiles and turns into his original homunculus form- How did you know it was me, Kaito? For a brain like yours, you could get in trouble
Kaito: Well, we must take advantage to the fullest while we're not yet in trouble now. So, are you the father of Rose's baby?
Envy: I don't know what you are talking about…
Kai: Yeah right, As if he'll admit it
Kaito: Yup! So I was informed.
Envy: I don't take interests in girls or boys; I'm only interested in killing o-chibi-chan and Alphonse-kun
Kaito: Uh-huh! Did you know that revenge is evil?
Envy: I don't care
Kai: Kaito, I don't think…
Kaito: Shut up! I told you to be quiet
Kai: But you said for a minute
Kaito: Just keep quiet, I'll tell you when you can speak
Kai: Okay…
Kaito: So… where are we? –turns around, Envy disappeared, going back to his show- Drats! We've been ditched…
Kai: Let the search and rescue operation begin!!
Kaito: You mean search and question operation begin…
Kai: Whatever!
Kaito: Kyouya (In Ouran)
Kyouya: -stepped out of nowhere- What is it, Kaito-san?
Kaito: Get your 100 special police force, we need to find Envy
Kyouya: Who? No, a better question, why would I use our special police force to find that nonsense character that you're looking for? I don't have anything to gain…
Envy: -came out of his show- Hey, who said I'm a nonsense character?
Kyouya: Me, considering you are just a dust and a waste of time…
Envy: Grrr… you're the third person in my blacklist, remember that?
Kyouya: Whatever, I'm going back to our original show –mutters to himself- they're even worse than Hikaru and Kaoru combined, even when fighting I guess
Kaito: So anyways, Envy, have you decided to tell us?
Envy: No, I don't care about that, hmmm… you'll pay for this… - and exits the stage-
Kai: Men, we've been really ditched!
Kaito: Not quite, we have to ask the last person to answer this nonsense question. – exits the stage-
Kai: Well, who? I don't see anyone who can answer 'our' question…
Kaito: -Hits Kai at the back of his head- We haven't asked the mother dope!
Kai: Oh right… Her, hehehehe….
Kaito: I better go fetch her –exits stage-
Kai: Now that Kaito's out of here for awhile… Camera man-san, stop the taping –now the camera man already took a break a long, long time ago, the part where 'Espasol Guy' got eaten, and now thinks that the camera man stopped the taping- -sigh- what should I do? –went to the couch on stage and laid down- Man!! It's boring!! What should I do? Without Kaito, it's very boring… -fell asleep, eventually-
15 minutes of agonizing time
Kaito: -Returns with Rose-san and is holding two large frappuccinos - Kai? Kai? Kai?! Now where did that idiot go? –looks at the couch and saw Kai sleeping-
Rose: Do you think we should still wake up Kai-san?
Kaito: Nah, -turns back and took something from his pockets- Hello, is this Lavi-san (from D. Gray-Man, a red head)?... Well, I have a task for you…
A few minutes later
??: -enters the stage- I've got the materials
Kaito: Good, good, Lavi-san, now let's start
Rose: um, Kaito-san… why are you holding a marker?
Kaito: You'll see… -evil laugh, and went to the couch where Lavi is already starting his own 'masterpiece'-
After a few doodles here and there
Lavi: There… it's all done, great work Kaito-san!
Kaito: You too… Now let's wake him up – Jumps on Kai- Oi! Kai, wake up
Kai: -Rolls to his side- I'm still sleeping, man, don't wake me up
Kaito: I've got us some frappe
Kai: -Sits up and now fully wide awake- Where?
Kaito: -Raises the mirror to Kai's face- Here
Kai: Waaah!! What did you do? Why is there markers on my face?
Rose: I have nothing to say
Kaito: Well, it's obvious, someone just doodled at your face dumbass
Lavi: it's a great artwork isn't it?
Kai: I wouldn't call this artwork!!
Kaito: YOU wouldn't call it an artwork but WE could call it an artwork
Kai: You called him, didn't you?
Kaito: Just for fun, ya know
Kai: Well, it ain't funny
Kaito: For YOU, for US, it is
Kai: I hate you
Kaito: Don't worry I love you too, I just should my way of love for you
Rose: -out of the conversation- I thought I'm here for an interview??
Kai: Grrr! One day I'll get you for this
Kaito: Well, that's one day, so I'll just have to wait
Rose: Ummm… Kaito-san, I thought I'm here for an interview?
Kaito: Oh sorry, señorita, I'm just busy for playing pranks against my brother, forgive me –about to reach out for her hand but Kai just smacked his hand from reaching Rose's face- Ouch!
Kai: Well, you're about to do that creepy thing, trust me, he's really a pervert –got smacked on the head-
Kaito: Oh really, well, you're the one who's peeping and the one who introduced me to 'your' world, sensei
Kai: You just surpassed me
Kaito: Well, you gave me the 'materials', you're the one who polluted my mind
Kai: Well, it ain't my fault you got interested in it
Kaito: Well, If you didn't introduce that 'degrading thing', I wouldn't turn into a pervert
Kai: Well, at least you're saying you're a pervert
Kaito: At least I'm being honest
Kai: Whatever
Kaito: -shook head and yawned- I'm sleepy, I'll go to my secret hiding place…
Kai: Hey! Come back here, we ain't done yet…
Kaito: -yawning- Whatever
Kai: Come back…
Kaito: -exits the stage to go to sleep-
Kai: Kaito!! (Did our personalities interchanged again?) –sighing and turns to face the camera- Hey sleeps anytime he wants, so for now… In the end nothing was revealed…
Rose: Uhh… Kai-san, erm… I thought… wha?
THE END!!
As/N: Kaito really is sleepy, so good bye!