There is something about feeling the screams, hearing their voices echo
throughout your body, being more of an annoyance. Perhaps his amydala is
fixed. Johnny's running through the underground dungeon, crashing into
doorways and tripping over bodies; and the faces jerk back and bare their
teeth at him, snapping at his torn black pants, which are shreds about his
ankles. Johnny screams, and in this act frightens even himself, hopping up
like a frightened rabbit, and then he tries to run even faster.
"God... damn... YOU!" Someone screams, and then there's a maniacal laughter pervading through his soul. Damn, Johnny thinks, he hates it but he FEELS it, feels the emotion ripping at his flesh, the fear freezing him, forcing him to nonsensically run circles in a maze he should know well enough. He's freaking out, see?
In the form of a Modernist Stream of Consciousness:
Blood
blood is red
why is this brown?
Why is it after me? - Blood
I have it in me, it's rushing through my veins
rushing through the dungeon
I thought this place was my own
but I want out
out
this isn't me anymore
trapped
Gotta get the bone - Heinous Monkey Foam
NO! - Keep concentrating
monkeys behind me, chasing, catching up
the blood is pooling up underneath me, what if-?
No. Can't be mine. It's never mine.
Nothing to worry about.
I own this place. Why isn't it mine anymore?
Damn squatters.
No place to call home.
Not my body
I'm all alone. Wish I wasn't alone. At home. But I'm alone. On the telephone.
Darkness:
a lone ray of light casts down the center of the room
Phone.
Devi.
Society.
People.
Pause.
Nothing to hold me back
nothing to hold me in -
step forward... but wait
A black hole emerges from the black floor and black Johnny screams a black scream of shiny death and is falling, but death would be an escape wouldn't it? So he doesn't land, he just keeps falling.
Alice in the rabbit hole -
No, Satan down the spiral.
God be merciful
God give me a Hell to land in.
God help me.
God is asleep.
God is dreaming a thousand dreams of a thousand million trillion flash bars, people scurrying about and sometimes he has nightmares and sometimes he just dreams to pass the time, and sometimes he hates the people of his dreams, but he always has that option to wake up and let all the stupid dream people disappear.
Please God wake up
I can't wake up.
I don't know how to sleep.
My feet in the air... to dream
to die perchance to...
meet Satan and God and after all
dustmites, eating at my brain.
The world was gone.
A land, a splash, and a slight float on a dark surface. Give in, he thinks and doesn't attempt to float, he takes a breath but that air holds his small frame up against, the water. No use. Blow out useless oxygen, and he sinks to the depths. At the bottom sits a mirror, and Johnny, curious even in his last hour, kicks his feet to approach the mirror. At the sight of the reflection, he screams, water rushes into his lungs, and black clogs his eyes as the image plays itself repeatedly in his head, the upside down reflection of all the world, of the minute details skimming over the surface, pounding into his skull, until he wants to rip it off, something he can never escape, never....
god's eye.
can god vomit
If God was a woman ---?
no, A squatty gnome
oompa - loompa doomy doom doom.
Ripping own head off
strength....? questionable.
Johnny shudders and then white envelops him. A private heaven, perhaps?
Heaven is what you want it to be.
That would indicate some set notion of WANTING.
He doesn't have that.
"Sure you do."
Devi glares down at him. "You want things. You're just ashamed of them."
"Holes in you." Light seeping through flesh. Screams as something takes over.
Fucking...
but no. We mustn't get to that. Don't go that far. Wake up.
Primal urges
the same as emotions.
Meathead instincts.
Rise above that, Johnny.
You could do so much more.
The water drips.
Why are you saddened? Why does the water dripping concern you?
Nothing touches me, I'm invincible.
I'm apathetic. I'm above and beyond.
You can't touch me. I won't let you.
I'm so far up, I can't even touch myself.
I am nothing.
So fuck you.
Johnny wakes.
"God... damn... YOU!" Someone screams, and then there's a maniacal laughter pervading through his soul. Damn, Johnny thinks, he hates it but he FEELS it, feels the emotion ripping at his flesh, the fear freezing him, forcing him to nonsensically run circles in a maze he should know well enough. He's freaking out, see?
In the form of a Modernist Stream of Consciousness:
Blood
blood is red
why is this brown?
Why is it after me? - Blood
I have it in me, it's rushing through my veins
rushing through the dungeon
I thought this place was my own
but I want out
out
this isn't me anymore
trapped
Gotta get the bone - Heinous Monkey Foam
NO! - Keep concentrating
monkeys behind me, chasing, catching up
the blood is pooling up underneath me, what if-?
No. Can't be mine. It's never mine.
Nothing to worry about.
I own this place. Why isn't it mine anymore?
Damn squatters.
No place to call home.
Not my body
I'm all alone. Wish I wasn't alone. At home. But I'm alone. On the telephone.
Darkness:
a lone ray of light casts down the center of the room
Phone.
Devi.
Society.
People.
Pause.
Nothing to hold me back
nothing to hold me in -
step forward... but wait
A black hole emerges from the black floor and black Johnny screams a black scream of shiny death and is falling, but death would be an escape wouldn't it? So he doesn't land, he just keeps falling.
Alice in the rabbit hole -
No, Satan down the spiral.
God be merciful
God give me a Hell to land in.
God help me.
God is asleep.
God is dreaming a thousand dreams of a thousand million trillion flash bars, people scurrying about and sometimes he has nightmares and sometimes he just dreams to pass the time, and sometimes he hates the people of his dreams, but he always has that option to wake up and let all the stupid dream people disappear.
Please God wake up
I can't wake up.
I don't know how to sleep.
My feet in the air... to dream
to die perchance to...
meet Satan and God and after all
dustmites, eating at my brain.
The world was gone.
A land, a splash, and a slight float on a dark surface. Give in, he thinks and doesn't attempt to float, he takes a breath but that air holds his small frame up against, the water. No use. Blow out useless oxygen, and he sinks to the depths. At the bottom sits a mirror, and Johnny, curious even in his last hour, kicks his feet to approach the mirror. At the sight of the reflection, he screams, water rushes into his lungs, and black clogs his eyes as the image plays itself repeatedly in his head, the upside down reflection of all the world, of the minute details skimming over the surface, pounding into his skull, until he wants to rip it off, something he can never escape, never....
god's eye.
can god vomit
If God was a woman ---?
no, A squatty gnome
oompa - loompa doomy doom doom.
Ripping own head off
strength....? questionable.
Johnny shudders and then white envelops him. A private heaven, perhaps?
Heaven is what you want it to be.
That would indicate some set notion of WANTING.
He doesn't have that.
"Sure you do."
Devi glares down at him. "You want things. You're just ashamed of them."
"Holes in you." Light seeping through flesh. Screams as something takes over.
Fucking...
but no. We mustn't get to that. Don't go that far. Wake up.
Primal urges
the same as emotions.
Meathead instincts.
Rise above that, Johnny.
You could do so much more.
The water drips.
Why are you saddened? Why does the water dripping concern you?
Nothing touches me, I'm invincible.
I'm apathetic. I'm above and beyond.
You can't touch me. I won't let you.
I'm so far up, I can't even touch myself.
I am nothing.
So fuck you.
Johnny wakes.